《The Due》13 - Post Battle Contemplation
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The woman stretched out with snaking tendrils. “Give him to me. I will give him what he deserves.”
Walter looked between the woman and Tushen’s soul. It would be a fitting punishment, spoke a part of Walter. Who else but the victim deserved to mete justice? But Walter could see the emotions rocking the woman’s soul. He could easily see her becoming something she hated, all in the name of justice.
But was it his place to tell the woman no? Out of all the souls, her justice would be the most deserving. And perhaps she wouldn’t succumb to vengeance.
Walter sighed. He didn’t expect the decision to be so hard. He wished there was someone he could discuss things with. Especially since he had a lot more questions after severing Tushen’s soul.
Wait, Walter could reach out to Davy. The god had said how to contact him, and who better than another god to go to for advice?
Davy? I need your help.
Davy’s voice appeared in Walter’s head, accompanied by the sounds of a sailing ship. You alright, lad? You sound tired.
Now that Davy mentioned it, Walter did feel tired. He slumped over, stumbling to place a hand on the wall. The ghost woman, or daemon, or whatever she was, hovered over in mild panic. Walter waved her away.
“I’m alright,” he said. “Just tired. Apparently that took a lot out of me.”
What did, lad?
Walter quickly recounted the tale to Davy.
And now I don’t know what the correct decision is, Walter thought.
He heard a sigh come from Davy. Lad, I told you not to get caught up in doing the right thing. Make a choice.
But what if it’s wrong? Walter asked.
Since when are gods wrong? Davy countered.
All the time. The Greek pantheon was full of them.
Davy sighed. Lad. That’s not what I mean. I thought being out in the world would help.
What?
Listen, lad. Gods aren’t human. A god doesn’t hold the concept of morals. A god is aspects. Right and wrong doesn’t enter the picture.
How can it not enter the picture? You’re the one that said I change according to how people see me.
Walter could feel Davy scratching his head through their connection. He looked over at the wisp woman while waiting for Davy’s answer.
She had stopped next to the remains of the three skeletons and was using her newfound corporealness to dig graves. Turum’s body laid nearby, looking less like someone dead and more like someone asleep.
Okay, lad. Davy said. I’m going to try and explain things so your human soul can understand it. But! I’m not an expert on this and I’ve never had the experience you humans have had, so don’t expect any of this to be concrete.
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Walter nodded, only to realize Davy couldn’t tell. Got it.
I guess I’ll start with human souls. You and your kind were made to observe the world for answers. For example, if you wanted to know how fire worked, you had to watch it burn. It’s why you always need to have an explanation for things. That’s your human soul wanting to explain the world.
When Sod contracted you he gave you the powers over death in his world. Gods aren’t like humans, lad. They don’t need an explanation for how things work, they just know.
What? How? Walter asked.
I’m getting there don’t get impatient. Davy cleared his throat. Gods are aspects of a thing. An example from Earth is Zeus. He’s the aspect of the sky, and as such has the powers of the sky. There might be hundreds of stories with varying descriptions of what he does, but at his core he is the sky. Zeus doesn’t need to observe the sky to know the sky. It’s the same for you, lad. You’re an aspect of Death, you don’t need an explanation for how it works. The afterlife is yours to make as you see fit, right and wrong doesn’t cover it.
So, what? I just make a decision and it’s right? Walter asked.
No, I’m saying that as a god you can’t make a right or wrong decision because your aspect already knows what the answer is, lad. Davy answered. Now, make your decision already.
The god broke the connection with Walter, leaving the man frustrated.
“I hate having no direction,” he grumbled.
Davy felt like a professor that gave everyone in the class the tools to succeed, but never offered direction because, “it would stifle growth.” Walter hated those professors.
The ghostly woman hovered over him. Her burial finished.
“I didn’t want to be the sole judge of this,” Walter said with annoyance.
The woman nodded, but there was no feeling behind it.
Walter held up Tushen’s soul. “Let’s get back to this.”
“Will you give him to me?” She asked.
Walter looked at the soul in his hands and tried to piece things together. The portion of himself attuned to death reached for answers, and a number of them returned. Poetic Death showed Walter leaving Tushen somewhere where the soul had no control. Tushen would spend his years learning to give up his need to control. Once learned the soul could return to the cycle.
Vengeful Death showed Walter creating a place of torture. Tushen would be subjected to all the horrors did and would inflict on his victims. Only when the soul was broken would it return to the cycle.
Merciful Death showed Walter stripping Tushen of all that he was and returning him to the cycle as a blank slate. The soul would return another day, changed wholly from the new life.
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Just Death showed Walter handing the soul over to the woman. She would create fitting punishments for Tushen’s soul, and the man would learn his lesson from the experience. Only then would the two souls return to the cycle.
Finally, Inevitable Death showed Walter crushing Tushen’s soul completely, using the pieces as fertilizer for weaker souls that entered his domain.
Other facets of Death showed their answers to Walter, but many were reflections of these five. None of them showed Walter an answer he wanted. Of course, Walter wasn’t exactly sure what it was he wanted to see.
“What would you do with Tushen?” Walter asked the wisp.
The woman’s raspy voice echoed through the caves. “First, I would force the man to see every act he committed from my eyes. Every emotion, every feeling, would be used to show how he wronged me, wronged us.”
The vitriol in the woman’s voice gave Walter pause. He’d never heard anger like that outside of movies. It was like the woman wanted nothing more than to torture Tushen for eternity.
Just Death agreed with the woman, but it left a dark pit in Walter’s stomach. If he did hand Tushen’s soul over, the woman’s anger would never subside. Her soul would carry that vindictiveness until a line was crossed and Walter was forced to punish the woman’s soul.
In Walter’s mind, it was a false justice. What use was a punishment that caused another to suffer? No, a truly just punishment would be something else. Tushen would need reprimanding, but Walter couldn’t do it at the cost of this woman’s soul.
Poetic Death reached out, again showing Walter their decision. Tushen would learn how to let go of the need for control, returning to the cycle a changed man. Walter almost accepted, until he saw that the change wouldn’t actually be for the better. Poetic Death would remove Tushen’s need to control entirely, leaving the soul to the whims of others around him. And while it was poetic, Walter couldn’t help but imagine his death at the hands of the sea. He didn’t want to subject others to the panic that came with a lack of control.
He rejected Merciful, Vengeful, and Inevitable Death as well. Vengeance wasn’t a route Walter could take, and he didn’t want souls to see him as a punisher. Inevitable Death was impossible for Walter, as he knew he could never destroy the soul without losing a part of himself. And Mercy didn’t feel like mercy, though Walter could see how resetting the soul’s experience could seem like it.
But, Walter had to make a decision. The godly part of Walter demanded it. This choice would help shape his domain and how his power manifested.
So, Walter did something he didn’t like doing; he introspected.
What kind of god did Walter want to be? He already knew that he wasn’t the wrathful kind of god. Walter didn’t have it in him to unleash plagues on those who refused to obey. He wasn’t a retributive god either. That only brought more retribution down the line.
No, Walter wanted to be a god that brought Peaceful Death. He wanted to be the kind of person that reached out a comforting hand to those struggling, no matter how far gone they might seem.
Walter knew that the decision stemmed from his own experience with death. He knew that he couldn’t live with himself if he stood by and let someone else experience the same pain he did. Or worse, cause said pain.
His feelings sorted, Walter started to see a new path, one that would free the wisp woman from her burden and perhaps Tushen as well. There was no guarantee, but Walter knew he had to try.
The god looked at the woman—Purum, a part of himself said—and spoke.
“I can’t give you to him.”
The wisp woman Purum hissed, her misty hands sharpening into claws.
Walter took a breath. “I know you want justice, and I know that you think the most fitting punishment is giving the soul to you. But I know that if I do that, you’ll never rid yourself of his influence. He’ll always be a part of you. And I don’t think that’s right.”
“I don’t care,” the woman said.
“But I do,” Walter said. “Look, I know you think nothing matters besides your vengeance, but I can’t live with myself knowing there was another way.”
Purum narrowed her eyes. “What other way?”
“Part of my duties as a death god is collecting souls,” Walter started. “But I can’t do it alone.”
Walter motioned past the cave to where he knew Flipper was waiting. “Flipper is a helper, a ferryman who collects souls and takes them to my domain. But he’s an animal with no experience. He can’t understand people. You, however, can.
“I want to hire you as a helper. More specifically, a helper who collects the souls of victims like yourself. You would know the pain they deal with better than Flipper ever could, and you could help them remember that the pain isn’t what defines them.”
Walter held out his hand. “How about it? Instead of punishing the one who caused your pain, you can save those who would become like you. You could work to keep them from becoming daemons, saving them from causing more pain.”
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