It had taken me some time to recover. My sister's Regeneration spell and the much more potent Cure Wounds spell cast by Eld'tide's mother had knocked me right back out. But at least it had been a dreamless sleep that awaited me and not more of these weird dreams I couldn't quite remember. Except for that sneering face full of contempt looking down at me. That came back to me time and again, whenever I was awake. Kaele noticed that I was deep in thought at times, she barely left my side after all, but I couldn't quite bring myself to mention these fuzzy dreams to her. They were weird after all and I didn't want her to think of me as weird. Thankfully she didn't inquire. It guess it was only natural to be lost in thought every once in a while after all that had happened to us in just a few short days.

And it wouldn't even be an incorrect assumption that all these things were on my mind. They were gnawing at me, some in an intellectual, others in an emotional sense. It would take time to find all the answers I would need to unravel the going-ones that were behind this sudden attack on our domain. I would have to deal with the void in my heart first. I had hoped, hoped so very hard, that the thrice cursed ghoul had been lying when he had claimed that mother had fallen and that he had her impaled on a stake in front of his tent. His claims had been no lie though. Mother had died on the very first day of this bloody mess and he had her set up like a trophy. Worse, the monster had gorged itself on her flesh in plain view of the village's defenders.

The thought alone was enough to make me sick but I had to be strong. Not for myself but for all the others. Especially for my sister. Still, I had to lean on her when they finally allowed me out of bed and back on my own feet to say my goodbyes to mother, before her pyre would be lit. Most of the people had already bade their farewell to their lady in the last days, as she lay laid out on the pile of wood and kindling that had been prepared for her. She had been wrapped in a burial shroud, or rather several of them, and the wood she lay upon was drenched in essential oils. Four warriors of her banner, including Khuzan's mother, stood guard around her. The rest were busy making sure no stragglers of the human army remained within our lands.

Numerous floral wreaths had been draped over her and the pile of oil drenched wood upon which she rested as well. Kaele and I brought some more. Many of the people who were busy cleaning up the aftermath of the siege and the battle that ended it looked up as we passed by them. Most bowed their heads to us. Some shared words of grief or encouragement with us. I hardly noticed them, lost in my own grief and my own pain. The guards took a step back as we approached. I straightened up best I could as Kaele stepped ahead of me, placing her flowers next to the cloth wrapped head of mother's body, tears streaming down her face. That last few steps took every last bit of strength I could muster. Finally I sank to my knees opposite of my sister, placing my own flowers and crying my own tears.

Some of the oil the wood was drenched with soaked into the dress I was wearing over the bandages still covering more of my body than I liked. The relationship between me and mother had been complicated at times. She was the one who had Khuzan's mother Uzzana put me through such harsh training ever since I was old enough to hold a training weapon. Often enough she had joined me though, coming out of it no less exhausted and bruised than me. She had been the one to sing me to sleep as well, when I hurt and was exhausted. She had been the one to teach me how to read and write alongside Kaele, encouraging me to keep going whenever my sister picked up these skills so much faster than me. I had disappointed her at times but I knew that she had been proud of me in the general.

Her frowns as much as her smiles had been what had guided me on my path to this very day. It was hard to believe that she was gone now, that she would never smile neither frown at my antics and achievements ever again. I had known that she would scold us for sneaking out of the house and the village. I had been certain as well though that she would be proud of us as well. But now, now there was only silence. It was as if there was a big gaping hole in my heart. I knew I wasn't the only one who had lost a loved one. The air had been heavy with the smell of smoke, even after the grand fire we had set on that hill had died down again. It had been the smoke from numerous smaller pyres. Still I was left wondering how they could all keep going.

How could you keep going on with your live when your heart was bleeding? I raised my head, looking at the weeping Kaele kneeling at mother's other side. Was it because they still had someone else? Someone for whom they had to be a pillar of strength? Was that how my sister kept going despite everything? Could I do the same? Could we both stand strong by leaning on each other? Or would I only bring both of us down like that? Well, I would have to try at least. One of the earliest training sessions in the sandy fighting pit I could remember came to my mind. “No matter how often you fall, as long as you can get back up onto your feet you aren't defeated. As long as you can stand up, you can keep going.” I quietly spoke the words she had spoken back then, as she had extended her hand to pull me back to my feet.

Thus I got back to my feet after brushing my fingertips along mother's cloth wrapped face one last time. It took a lot of effort, especially as I had to mind my tender side. I really didn't want to reopen that wound after others had gone to such lengths to make sure I would survive it. Kaele must have noticed, as she stood as well, wiping tears from her eyes. I rounded the pyre and pulled her into a hug, to allow her to cry some more. It wasn't a very comfortable hug, as Kaele was considerably shorter than me and her horns poked me in sensitive places every once in while but I let her weep at my bosom anyway. Uzzana stepped close and put a hand on my back, providing me with some much needed support. She must have noticed that I was swaying a little.

The support she offered was of an emotional nature as well though. She had put me through grueling training more than once, but she always been there for me as well. She had been there for the people here as well, when mother was killed and put on display in such a degrading way. It had been her who had led the defense of the village and later the counter attack, when we drew away enough of the enemies force. It had been her who had kept most people alive and the worst from happening. There was much we had to thank her for. More than I probably was aware of right now. “What are we going to do now?”, I asked in a whisper, just loud enough for her to hear.

She patted my back. “First we will take a few steps back and I will get you some torches to light the pyre. We will join the evening meal in her honor afterwards. And in the days to come we will finish cleaning up around here.” She paused briefly. “We still haven't finished burying all the human dead. We aren't done gathering the spoils of war either. And of course we have to make certain that there are no more stragglers hiding in the forests and hills. Once all of that is taken care of, you need to think about traveling to Bleak Peak.” She paused once more to swallow hard. “The king's court needs to learn about this, the steel and iron we gathered needs to be handed over to the treasury … and you need to make your claims to the domain, so the king can bestow it upon you, making you the next lady of Caer'zoth.”

She must have noticed the incredulous look I threw her way. That was a pretty long list of things to do and very few of them would be easily done. She flashed me a crooked smile. “Don't worry. You just take one step at a time. First things first.” I could only nod. She led us a few steps away from the pyre. A prudent measure. The thing would burn fast and hot considering all the oil the wood had been drenched with. Many people had stopped whatever they had been doing, gathering around us, to see mother off and pay her their respect one last time. One of the guards handed us torches and we lit them with magic. I threw mine at the funeral pyre, shortly followed by my sister and as the thing caught on fire we stood and watched, together with all the other people. The people that were now our responsibility.