《The Bartender at the End of the Universe》Ch 205: Defending the S.S. Squeaker
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"Swing it. Just swing it now!" Og'drimun squealed.
Narissa, Pockets, Sid, and Death were all sitting along the back of the giant rubber ducky. Sid was holding a rusted twenty-three miles per hour speed limit sign like one you'd normally see alongside the road in a residential area. Metal pole and all, he was using it to swat away any of the bat creatures that ventured a little too close to their yellow haven from the red liquid below them.
There's one! Right there bro, on your left. Death called out as he pointed his bony finger towardmorere creatures as they flew closer to their bath toy.
"I am aware," Sid replied calmly.
WHAP!
Pockets had thrown a whipped cream pie at Ted's face. It landed with a wet smack. Attached to the pie was a rope that led back to her gloved hands.
"Grab onto that there life raft, and I'll pull ya aboard captain." She said with a slight pirate accent.
Ted was still next to Sentenza. Both of them had their backs up against the bars of the prison cell. The waves created by the water constantly pouring in pushed against them and helped keep them upright, if not also pinned against the cage.
Ted's face was now covered in a white cream, that was quickly being dyed various shades of pink as the water splashed up against it. As he wiped the substance he hoped was food away from his eyes, Ted couldn't help but think about the situation he was in. Strange creatures that hatched from some giant egg, but looked like mammals were chasing him. Red liquid that was far too thin to be blood was quickly filling the room they were in.
Not to mention a lot of his friends were now riding on top of a rubber ducky, with Sid defending them with a speed limit sign. Somehow what was craziest of all to Ted was that the sign was twenty-three miles per hour, not something like twenty or twenty-five. He'd never actually seen one like that before. It seemed to open the door to a lot of questions in Ted's mind.
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"Hurry and grab on!" Og'drimun warned. "There's a bunch headed your way."
The demon's cries brought Ted back to reality. He looked down at the rope and metal pie tin in front of him. Somehow both were floating on the red liquid Ted was sure wasn't blood. After all, it was far too thin and aggressively red to be blood.
BANG!
Ted flinched as Sentenza fired a gun right by his head.
"They're aggressive little things, aren't they?" Sentenza mused before his eyes gazed back into the prison cell behind them. "Thought it could sneak up by swimming, or maybe it just got lost from the rest of the swarm?"
One of the bat-like creatures was now floating on the water. At least, its body was. Ted looked back into the air, and most of them were still swarming around each other. Thick enough to keep ahold of Death's scythe. But here and there lone ones seemed to wander off. Either flying alone, or a few that had dove into the water and were currently swimming.
Ted slapped his cheek to try and center himself in the moment. His hand left a red handprint in the cream that covered him. "Alright! Come on Sentenza, let's get over to the others."
"Fraid I can't do that." Sentenza replied gruffly.
As Ted gripped the rope firmly he realized what his friend said. "Huh?" He asked. "Why not? The rope is right here, and it's a straight shot."
Sentenza shook his head as the waves continued to push on the two of them. "Got to take care of some things. Besides, they already seem to be having some trouble keeping themselves safe." He said as he motioned with his gun towards the duck.
Ted's eyes followed the direction Sentenza pointed, and he saw one of the creatures as it climbed up the side of the rubber ducky.
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"Hey, watch ou...ack!" Ted tried to warn them, but was interrupted ad Pockets yanked on the rope with all her might.
Somehow she had attached the rope to the line on an oversized fishing pole, and was currently reeling in Ted. "Ooh, I think I got me a big one!" She squealed in delight.
BANG!
Sentenza fired again, and shot off the creature that had swam up and onto their impromptu life raft. His eyes then drifted back towards the fake wall in the room behind him. It seemed to fold in more and more as the water rushed up against it.
"Perhaps one of you could assist in the defense of our raft?" Suggested Sid as he knocked away several flying creatures.
But bro, you're the only one with the cool weapon here. Death argued.
"You had a weapon, but you lost it." Sid countered.
Whoa, harsh man. It's not like I meant to. Those little guys just overwhelmed me! You'd have totally done the same thing if you were in my shoes dude.
"Besides, I'm helping plenty by supervising your use of the one weapon," Og'drimun declared proudly.
"Perhaps you could hand out more weapons?" Sid suggested as he turned to Pockets.
The clown had laser focus on her target as she expertly reeled in her prey. For a moment it seemed like she didn't even hear Sid. But, as Ted was yanked up, coughing and sputtering, onto the rubber ducky she turned towards Sid.
"Usually a guy is the one begging to show off his weapon, but I suppose if you're that curious, I could help you out just this once." Pockets said as she tossed the fishing rod out into the water and shoved her hand down. Her pants.
She pulled out a slingshot and tossed that at Og'drimun. She yanked out a Spear that she tossed to Ted. Next was a bowling ball that went to Narissa, but her hands came up empty when it came time to give Death a weapon. As she shrugged with an innocent smirk on her face, it seemed several knives were suddenly sticking out from between Death's ribcage.
Really? The skeleton groaned as he looked down at the various blades sticking out of him.
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