《The Bartender at the End of the Universe》Ch 12: Drinks and Friendships on the Precipice
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"You're going to what?"
"Dump it."
"All of it?"
"Yeah."
"But why?"
Ted looked up towards the building they had dubbed, The Oasis. He let out a sigh and shook his head. "I don't know exactly if I'm being honest."
"Then, why waste it? We do not have to throw it out," Sid offered.
"Yeah, have to say I agree with Sid on this one," added Sentenza.
Ted tried to sort through his feelings on this subject. "It's my uncle. He's the one who showed me a lot of this brewing stuff and got me interested in it at all. He'd always come to family holidays with some new experiment. He never had a lot of money, so he'd make alcohol for gifts. He was a little odd, but you could tell he really loved his family."
"Right, and did your uncle say to throw this stuff away?"
"I mean, yeah." Sid and Sentenza both looked confused, so Ted tried to explain. "My uncle had a lot of weird beliefs about homebrewing. It'd take just a small nudge and he'd go off on a rant about how people got too caught up on fancy equipment and a strict, technical process that left no room for error. While forgetting about the spirit of making alcohol." Ted chuckled. "Sorry, he always thought it was so hilarious how he fit the word spirit in there."
"It sounds like you were close." Sid pointed out.
Ted shrugged. "Sort of, but not really. It's hard to explain. He was around for a lot of the time growing up, but he moved away and lived near a forest when I got older. Then I hardly ever saw him." Something seemed to bother Ted, but he quickly shook it off. "Right, I'm rambling, sorry. One of the things my uncle told me was important, was the first run you did on a new still."
Ted looked down at the three connected pots sitting over the firepit Bakade had made. "He'd say, 'A still isn't just a bunch of copper and metal thrown together to catch steam. It's a sort of living thing. A concentration of a true outdoorsman's spirit.' and of course, he'd laugh at his own joke again, and keep repeating it like, 'Outdoorsman's spirit. The spirit. Outdoorsman's spirit you see,' until I threw him a laugh. Then he would continue."
"And you remember these words of his?" asked Sentenza. "Must've been important then."
"Well, I mainly remember that first line because of how much he repeated it because I didn't really think it was that funny."
Sentenza laughed and shook his head as Sid tilted his head slightly. "Odd, why did you not simply go along with it to humor him?"
"I don't know. Guess I thought it was funny how I didn't think he was funny? Ah, that doesn't make sense does it...well, whatever reason, I know I didn't laugh until he was practically elbowing my ribs with that ridiculous smile on his bearded face."
"That is alright. I do not expect your memory or reasoning capabilities to be perfect. Feel free to continue to explain why we are wasting this." Sid seemed finished, but as Ted was opening his mouth, Sid cut in and added, "I would think the thorough washing and running vinegar through that we did would be more than enough if the cleaning of foreign items is the purpose."
Ted shook his head. "He'd talk about how there were two things that were very important with a new still. First, it had to be run outside near trees. He said that it didn't have to be far out in the woods, like he did it, but that it had to be near some living trees. That like all sacrifices, it had to be prepared and done out in the wilds. In sight of nature. Even more important. He told me again and again, that every new still needed to be christened by having the very first run be some kind of rum and that it had to be thrown away. Not a drop could be drunk, otherwise there would be dire consequences. But he did say the dunder was fine to use for another run."
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"Oh? A bit superstitious don't you think?" Sentenza said as he whittled a small chunk of wood with his knife.
Ted nodded. "Yeah, definitely, but he was adamant about it. He even told me of the first still he had, and how he didn't run a sacrificial run. He called that still the Bloated Fungus, and always kept it around, but never ran anything through it. That's because he ran a rum in it first and used all of it but the heads. Even the tails he mixed with the rest and turned into different drinks. That turned out great. But the next run he did was made from watermelon. Everything went well, but when he distilled it," Ted paused as he shuddered.
After a moment refocusing himself, he continued. "When he distilled it, it tasted like rotting fruit. He still bottled it and put it aside with a label saying it was undrinkable. The next one was a hard cider he tried to distill, and again, that same taste of rot followed the drink. He said that after that, he cleaned it the very best he could. Soaking every part in the strongest cleaners he had, and he even got a fancy cleaner made for sanitizing stills. Then he ran a rum again, and at first it tasted great, but as it aged, that taste of rot rose up more and more, until it was so foul simply opening a bottle of the stuff was enough to make you gag."
"So, your uncle believed that his failure to make a sacrifice led to his still becoming cursed?" queried Sid.
"Well, he always ran a sacrificial run of rum using the same Dunder that he saved from the first run. So, I'd say he believed it. But some of his stuff was absolutely amazing. Like people who hated alcohol could all find something they absolutely loved that he made. Like he'd somehow have exactly what they never knew they needed already ready for them when he offered them a drink."
"What is this Dunder?" queried Sid.
"Ah well Dunder is just the stuff that doesn't get distilled in the rum. It's all the stuff left in the boiler after you distill. You're supposed to reuse it in each batch of rum, using about twenty percent or so Dunder in a new wash. Adds more flavor each time, or at least my uncle swore it did. The Dunder from this will be fine to reuse in the next run, just not the rum itself."
Sentenza sighed. "Well, Dunder or not, I still say it's an awful waste to throw out what is probably good rum. But it seems your mind is made up. No point in arguing it now."
Ted was about to say something when he heard the pot bubbling. He walked over and lightly touched the metal pipe sticking out of the lid. The pipe was already warm, but then like a flash it turned burning hot. "Ah! That's it. We need to get the heat down slightly now. It's time to actually tackle this run."
"He did what!"
"Threw it out. All of it."
"Why?"
"Some ritual from his uncle." Sentenza cut off one last little chip of wood before he set down the chunk of wood that now looked roughly like a squirrel. "I tell you Trizel, it was painful to watch. He never even tasted the stuff as it came out. Just put it all in these glass jars and dumped it deeper in the forest."
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"I still do not understand." struggled Trizel as he rubbed his forehead. "Our supplies are not infinite, and he throws out something we could have at least given as payment?"
"Why don't you check with him yourself if you're so worried? He's out back working with Sid and Bakade on some new project." suggested Sentenza. "I think I might take a short nap. Working in the woods can be mighty tiring on a fella."
Sentenza tilted his hat over his eyes and interlaced his fingers over his stomach as he leaned back in the chair. Trizel raised his finger as he was about to say something else but seemed to change his mind. As he lowered his hand, he left Sentenza alone at the table as he headed out of The Oasis. Outside it wasn't hard to find the three of them. Bakade was standing around watching as Sid and Ted used sticks to draw on the ground.
"What is this I hear about you throwing away perfectly good supplies?" snapped Trizel angrily.
Ted stood confused for a moment before it came to him. "You mean the sacrificial run?"
"Sacrifice? To whom? What deity is there that demands the first of your harvest in this blasted place?"
"I do believe we have a similar arrangement with a being who some may consider a deity," Sid pointed out.
Trizel rubbed the bridge of his nose as he grit his teeth. "Thank you for the reminder, Sid. Then if we're already feeding one 'deity,' what other one have you miraculously stumbled upon that it has earned your sacrifices of our supplies?"
Ted was taken aback. Trizel was so aggressive it threw him off somewhat. "It's just what you're supposed to do with a still. The first run is thrown out. My uncle said..."
"Ted, listen to yourself! Is your uncle here? Why hold to these beliefs? We are in serious trouble, and you do not seem to care at all!"
Trizel started to get himself more and more worked up. "There is an army at our gates, and you seem content to not only bow to all their whims, but also ensure our own supplies dwindle even faster!"
"Trizel," Ted started before the giant turned and stormed off.
"Get your priorities sorted!" Trizel yelled out as he stormed off towards the horizon.
"Wwwaaaaaasssstefffuuulllll," Bakade groaned as she looked at Ted and shook her head.
Ted sighed. He wished things were easier. He wished he knew what he was supposed to do. He wished he could do more than keep their heads above water. He wished. He wished. It seemed wishes were all he really had now. Thrown from his old life but doing little more than wishing he could do more here, just like he had been doing back there. He wasn't any different after all. The same man, simply moved from one world into another.
"Ted!"
Sid's loud cry shook Ted from his thoughts. "Sorry, what?" asked Ted as he blinked.
"I understand. You should not be expected to abandon your rituals so easily. But now that you have done your sacrifice, hopefully there is no need to throw more away."
"Well, my uncle did have this other thing about oak barrels that were left sitting empty for too long."
Sid raised an eyebrow at Ted as Bakade said, "Teeeedddd..."
"I'm kidding. I'm kidding," Ted laughed, although it sounded a little more forced than normal. "Yeah, unless we make another still, that should be the last of it. Of course, we don't need fertilizer, so there's not a big use for most of the leftover washes we're going to have."
Bakade put a hand over her eye sockets and shook her head. "Nnooottt Ffuuunnnnyyy," she groaned.
Before Sid could undoubtably agree, Ted started to walk back into The Oasis. "I think there's something I need to do. Sorry I have to cut this short, but I'll see you guys around, alright?"
Sid and Bakade both seemed a little confused and could only manage a small wave as Ted disappeared into the lone building on the floating rock, they now called home. The two of them looked at each other until Sid finally broke the ice by saying, "I guess that means I beat Ted by default."
"So, this is where you got to." Ted said as he sat down next to Trizel with a mug in each hand.
Trizel stared down at the pulsing purple orb their rock was orbiting and didn't acknowledge Ted's presence. Ted sat next to him in silence for a minute. The last time Ted was here was when he had first arrived. Finally, he turned towards Trizel and held out a mug of freezer rum.
"You look like you could use a drink," said Ted with a small smile.
Trizel continued to ignore Ted, even with the offering of alcohol.
Ted sighed and set the mug down between them. Then he took a sip out of the mug still in his hand. "Sometimes it can be hard, you know. Just to move forward at all. When I think about it, some days knowing I'll wake up terrifies me. I was ripped from my life, but unlike you guys that one wasn't going anywhere. Now I'm here, and it feels like it's the same thing just in a different place. It feels like I've just been floating by, barely able to keep afloat as the river flows faster and faster under my boat."
Trizel did not say a word and did not shift his eyes away from the purple glow down below. However, he did grab the mug Ted had set down, and take a sip before holding the mug in both of his hands.
"It's been hard not to break down some days. But you know what's helped me?" Ted looked over at Trizel, who sat stoically. Ted slapped the giant's back and genuinely smiled as he said, "You. In fact, everyone here. Yes, even Nugget."
Trizel couldn't help himself and cracked a small smile.
"You, Sentenza, Nugget, Sid, and Bakade. You guys haven't fixed everything for me, but when we hang out, it's like all the mental strain I put myself under gets released for at least a little while. It's genuinely fun, and without it I don't know if I could've lasted this long."
Ted took in a deep breath and let it out as a slow sigh as he tried to mentally prepare himself. "But still, everything isn't magically better. All of us still have our same problems we're going to have to face. It's just been easier for me to face them with people by my side again."
Trizel scoffed as he tried to hide his smile. "Just shut up and drink you big idiot."
Ted slowly nodded. "We'll get through this. One day at a time. You may not have an army anymore, but you've got us. We've all got each other's backs."
Trizel turned towards Ted and shook his head. "I thought I said to shut up and drink with me?"
Trizel turned towards Ted with a smirk and held out his mug towards him. Ted smiled back and hit his mug against Trizel's before the two of them tipped their mugs back against their lips for a drink at the edge of the world.
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