When I woke up refreshed in the evening, I thought that my journey to becoming a powerful sorcerer would begin immediately. Dreams of summoning massive icebergs and throwing fireballs at monsters filled my head until I was begging Mephis to teach me more. Unfortunately, when I asked him for another incantation to practice, he gave me a very awkward look.

“Can you teach me another spell?” My earnest expression made him fidget a little bit. “Please?”

“Um…about that, to be honest. I can’t.” He said with an embarrassed chuckle. “To be honest, I have no talent for most magics. It took everything I had to learn Chill so I never bothered with anything more advanced.”

“WHAT?” Though it isn’t in Mephis’s nature to mess around, I can’t help but suspect that he’s making fun of me right now. “Didn’t those assassins call you the Blood Warlock? Doesn’t that make you some sort of powerful magician? Or do I not understand what a warlock is? How can you not know magic?” My words only make his cheeks turn a bit redder. It seems he is genuinely embarrassed to be having this conversation.

“My situation is a bit complicated…” He rises from beside me and paces around. “I can’t use elemental magic like most people. Fire, wind, water, and earth, they are beyond my reach unfortunately. That which I can use cannot be taught. Ugh, I didn’t foresee this. No one could have. I was expecting it to take years before you were ready to learn magic. At that time, things would have died down and it would have been safe to move on to the next stage of the plan. Now though…we have a problem.”

“Problem?” I find a tree to lean my back against as Mephis often does. Unconsciously, I check to make sure that I’m actually leaning against a real trunk. One time I accidentally laid on a rare species of giant insect which disguises itself as a fallen tree. After that incident, I didn’t sleep anywhere but inside my old basket for a week. “Isn’t this a good thing?”

“It is. But it also means that we need to figure out what to do with you. The younger one begins to wander down the path of magic, the farther one will be able to go in the future. I’ve never heard of anyone starting at your age, but surely it would create a miracle if we could find you a proper tutor.” Mephis reaches into his bag and pulls out a piece of dried Mud Boar which he gnaws on while thinking. “Lian entrusted me with the location of some friends of hers who might be able to help, but they won’t be expecting me to contact them for another few years. Even if it takes us three months to get out of the Dead Forest, we’ll be very early. They may not be ready to receive you. Additionally, you’ve only just started learning how to handle a sword. If you go to them, I won’t be able to teach you. And your father hoped that I’d be the one to teach you the basics.”

“I…wait, why wouldn’t you be able to teach me?” I ask. Once again, the same embarrassed expression comes on Mephis’s face. The man who doesn’t think twice to slay assassins suddenly turns bashful.

“I guess I never told you what my title means huh?” He roughly rips a strip of jerky off with his teeth before grunting, “Blood Warlock isn’t an honor or anything. At least not to the people of this country. If I show my face, or these red eyes of mine, when going into town, they’ll throw me out before I can say hello. It was difficult enough just getting milk for you without starting a warlock hunt. Even if Lian’s friends were willing to accept me, their neighbors would certainly report me eventually. That’s why I stay here, in the Dead Forest where no one gives me crap. It’s a lonely life, but I find I’ve had enough of people.”

“There’s really no way around this?” I study Mephis closely, watching his face. Though he pretends to put on a tough front in front of me, I’m very adept at reading people. The bitter loneliness and the fact that this man’s only social contact has been an oddball three-year-old kid, tells me everything I need to know about how bad his situation really is. I thought it was strange how willing Mephis is to have me around. After all, even if I’m the son of his old friends, I’m not his child. But now it makes sense…even someone else’s child is better than no one at all!

“No way around it at all.” Mephis’s usually unscarred face begins to grow valleys and lines as he frowns. He doesn’t pressure me to make any sort of decision. Instead, he simply explains everything as it is. Completely different from all the people in my past life who only sought to use me for money or power. “You have two choices. One…you can stay here with me and learn swordsmanship. However, I will not be able to teach you any more of magic. I know the chants for a few other basic spells, but I can’t even demonstrate them for you. If you stay, you will be lacking the proper teacher to harness your magical potential. Two…I can try to bring you to Lian’s friends. They should have the connections to find someone who can help you learn how to truly become a mage. But I cannot guarantee they will accept you this early. And there is a very real possibility that Lian’s enemies will still be actively searching for you. The Dead Forest may be a dangerous place to most people, but so long as you’re here with me, it will be difficult for assassins to find you. If you leave now, you’ll forfeit that protection.”

“I…” My voice falters and I realize how unprepared I am right now to face the world. Even though I am small, Mephis treats me like an adult. He gives me control over my own future and I am eternally grateful to this man for risking his life everyday so that I may have the opportunity to grow. Lian…you made a good friend. “Do I have to decide now?”

“Not at all. Like I said, I was planning on having you stay here for a couple years. But keep in mind, if you decide to leave, it will take us a while to exit the Dead Forest. I am truly sorry that you have to make such a choice. If I wasn’t so useless, you wouldn’t have to consider risking your safety.” Mephis bows his head. I hurriedly go rush under his arms and push on his chin from below. When he opens his eyes, the crimson orbs seem shinier than usual. Right then and there, I realize that he is serious. He really was planning on taking care of me for my entire childhood. But even if it means he would be alone in this place, he wouldn’t hesitate to let me go if that’s what I wanted. This…is really too selfless isn’t it?

Tears well up in my eyes and I don’t hide them nearly so well as Mephis does. As a child, I guess such muscles which are responsible for deception aren’t developed yet. Or maybe such a feeling as I am experiencing is just impossible to hide. After all, even in two lives, I so rarely felt like this. It’s hard to even put a word on the feeling. Gratitude. That’s what it is. I…am grateful to this man for raising me! From the very first night I was born, to this day, he has been looking out for me at the cost of offending trained killers. I never met my father in this life, but surely this man has raised me as his own. No…better than most people would raise their own children.

“T-Thank you.” I stumble on the words. They are not something I am used to saying. But if ever there was a time, it is now. Mephis doesn’t understand the immense emotion I am feeling right now. I think I said it too quietly for him to hear. But then a faint weight falls onto my hair, so light that I barely feel it.

*Plop*

It’s a drop of water, like the first drop of rain on a warm summer night. Mephis’s tear is not followed by ‘you’re welcome’. He says nothing. Neither of us is willing to admit the things we are feeling, but the unbroken silence in itself is acknowledgement of the truth.

He heard me.

“What will you do?” My steward finally asks, while clearing his throat. His arms go around my shoulder from above, and I’ve never felt safer, even in my mother’s arms. “Will you stay or go?”

“I’ll stay. At least until you’ve taught me a little more swordsmanship.” Perhaps I am stunting my future potential as a mage like this. Mephis said I was some sort of genius. I’m not even sure I will need to learn how to use a sword if I’m so great at magic. However, everything outside of this place is wishy washy, an unknown. There’s only one thing I know for certain. “I don’t want to go.”

“If that’s what you want.” His voice shakes a little, and I’m glad our eyes are hidden from each other by my overgrown hair right now. “We shouldn’t waste time then. You need to learn as much as you can while you’re young. Every moment is precious.”

“Then let’s get started!”