“But the numbers are meaningless.” Lettie murmured. The strap under her chin made speaking difficult.

“That which is not measured is meaningless! Assigning a value, even an arbitrary one, allows measurement and provides meaning. And with meaning comes growth. I have thought of everything.” Her father carefully tapped all the syringes, making sure that any dangerous air bubbles were pushed out.

“No, that does not follow. My strength is “ten,” but what does my “strength” mean?” She wondered if someone with a strength of twenty could break the padded shackles. Probably not. They were steel wrapped in padded cotton.

“Strength means strength. Your ability to lift and carry. It’s a holistic evaluation. You are just being silly now.” He tightened the rubber gloves over his hands. It was an absolute pain finding ones sufficiently insulated against heat and electricity, but retaining enough fine control in case surgery became necessary.

“Really, I’m not. “Strength” is more than just muscular development, it’s about muscle utilization, the ability to derive work from the muscles that exist. To say nothing of ligaments, tendons and the bone structure to support the work AND the different varieties of muscle fiber that do different types of work. A person could have significant muscle mass and have less effective ‘strength’ than a person with less muscle mass. It would be task dependent. And that information is not obtainable without testing.” She didn’t know why she was arguing about this. Clearly her father had long since passed the point where he could be reasoned with. In a moment of horrible lucidity, she decided that she just didn’t want to be burdened with something dumb.

“Pish posh. You could say the same about “charisma,” or “dexterity.” There is always going to be a degree of difference based on utilization. Nevertheless, the external evidence tends to correlate strongly with the ultimate result. Plus the numbers are constantly updating, to reflect new information. See, the system is perfect.”

The radioactive cores were all charged and ready to dump their high energy particles into bits of Lettie’s brain and nervous system, clearing the way for the nanites and drugs to follow. Her father had spent a fortune in both time and money to collect the very best.

“Again, I must question the premise. You argue that an arbitrary value allows quantification, and I see that you are looking to promote manipulation of those quantified values. But building a system to reward activities based on yet more arbitrary numbers, resulting in “rewards” of upward adjustment of my numbers- you can understand why I find the whole system absurdly inefficient and arbitrary. Don’t you?” She hated that she sounded pleading. She wasn’t the pleading sort. But her father was laying out all sorts of little hooks, and picks and rasps on boiled cotton gauze, and she was concerned.

“Oh sweet child.” He smiled fondly at her. He could still remember her first scraped knee, and the way she cataloged all the little bacteria trying to infect the wound. “That’s the gamification element. The more you do, experience, learn, the more strange things you collect, the better the system will be able to improve you. Be it muscle growth, improving facial structure, and even letting you think better. It’s not just about building a better you.” He squeezed her hand affectionately. “It’s about having fun while you do it. Love the life you live, right? Now. Mouth guard goes in. We didn’t spend all that time brushing just to crack your teeth when you convulse!”

She would have protested that too, but he got the hard black rubber in before she could say anything. He then strapped it around the back of the board that her head was strapped to. Her whole body was strapped to.

“I envy you. I am so glad, proud, that I can do this for you, but I also envy you. By the time you are my age, you will have proven the value of the system. You will be the torchbearer of the whole Pi Clan, leading them to a new era of power and prosperity.”

“Mmmrrrrmmmr?”

“Oh yes. You haven’t seen it. The way the other Clans bully us, push us out. “Useless without a tech base,” they say! They haven’t a fraction of our understanding of the world, but still they dare presume to lecture us on “utility!”” He swept his arms open, grandly waving at the floating spheres of plasma and bubbling liquids. A glass bowl full of something blue turned into white crystalline sand for a moment, then returned to liquid form.

“I ask you, who are the really useless ones? The murderous Ma? Core carving is a niche technology. The Xia? Walking clocks who think they are temporal vampires. The Bo? Damn near are actual vampires!”

Lettie frowned. “Mmmmrrr!”

“Alright, no, they don’t actually drink blood. The caloric density is far too low. But come on! I saw one punch his way out of a coffin, as he had himself buried, because he didn’t want to pay for a hotel room. These are not mentally sound people.” He took a long sniff of a powder, the effects of which only he knew. “Not mentally sound at all! But you will be. You will be stronger, faster, smarter, prettier than all of them. And once you prove my system works, it can be rolled out to the whole clan, and then, then! No matter the stage of the epoch, the Pi will reign supreme!”

He coughed, realizing he had been just a touch over the top. “Well, even if it doesn't work, I will always think that you are the prettiest, smartest, bestest girl in the whole world. Always and forever.”

He reached for the handle of the big lever that would start the current running through Lettie’s nervous system, then paused.

“Now, I know you will understand when I say that anesthetics would have unforeseeable drug interactions, and spinal blockers would be downright counterproductive, so you may feel a tingling sensation, some warm spots and occasionally a bit of a pinch.”

“MMMMRRRR?!”

He pulled the lever. The transformers let out a high pitched whine as the dials flicked back and forth, showing that Dr. Volt and Mr. Ampere were attending. Lettie’s back arched, fighting against the straps holding her to the table. Her father watched the dials with hawk-like eyes (it took him ages and an awful number of hawks to get them just right.) Once they were all in the green zone, he threw the second lever. The cores were silent, invisible x-rays and gamma rays stabbing into her brain, her bone marrow, running down her spine. They etched microscopic patterns in her bones, the placement and logic of which were known only to him.

When the cores had dumped their charge, he switched them and the electricity off. He produced a crown of needles, along with bands of needles to cinch down over her arms and legs. Once they were installed, he got a board the size of a dinner plate out, with more than a dozen hypodermics sticking out of it. He gently, but firmly, pressed it into her belly.

“It took me ages to calculate the right doses and the right order for the doses, you know. Absolutely ages.” He muttered. Lettie wasn’t conscious enough to hear him, but he still wanted her to know. He started pressing the plungers down, one at a time, across her body. He was humming a little tune as he did it, using it to keep time.

“Now, the finishing touch. Do you know what these are?” He held up a beaker full of gray liquid in front of Lettie’s vacant eyes. “I’ll tell you. Nanomachines! Older than the Nacon, if you can believe it. I found them on our trip to Mizzoula. I bred them up from almost nothing, bred twenty three different strains of them. Now that your body is primed for them, we can start inoculating you with them. They will scavenge what they need from your blood and digestive system. They will grow and adapt to you as you grow.” He waived at the row of identical beakers behind him.

He sniffed again. “I am so damn proud of you.” The beakers got poured into IV bags plugged into some of the needles already in her. He watched their levels sink, slowly coursing through her body.

“One last thing, sweetie. Almost done. It’s been perfect so far, just like you.” He carefully placed a white ball, pockmarked with little red divots over a black disk. The ball floated above the disk, spinning, as green threads of light projected up and over its surface. The black disk turned a pale blue-white. He waited, staring, hardly daring to breathe. A minute ticked past. Another. Lettie’s breathing was growing erratic, her heart rate was all over the place. She would die in another minute.

“No. NO! I FORBID IT! You must initialize! You are to be the core, my daughter’s second heart. Her third brain!” The machine ignored him. Lettie was gasping, like she couldn’t get enough air in.

“I will not be defeated by some defective rock!” He tore his shirt off, muscular chest gleaming in the lights of the operating theater. He slapped adhesive pads connected by wires to a machine, against his chest. “I didn’t want it to go this way. I wanted to share so much with you. Just not this way.” He crammed a copper cap on his head, thick wires running out of the top and into the base of the stone. He reached for the final switch, the one with the red handle. He grabbed it tight.

“For the Pi. For Lettie.” He pulled.

For a fraction of a second, his bones seemed to light up as the energy coursed through him. His head exploded into flames, as the light under the floating stone turned green. The rest of his body caught fire, his feet drumming against the floor as the electricity burned through him. The fire started spreading, first along the floors, then an electrical fire broke out in the machines themselves. In less than a minute, the whole operating theater was a sea of flames. The beakers with the extra chemicals and drugs started bursting, igniting, adding an extra layer of awful to the inferno. Perhaps mercifully, the roof collapsed, dumping torrential rain into the fire. The generators shorted out, the electricity stopped running.

The rain fell on hissing, spitting, embers. And then, a fist punched up through the burnt boards and shingles! It withdrew and punched up again, and again. A second hand joined it, then rising from the ashes was Lettie. She spat the mouth guard out and-

“WaaaaHAHAHAHAHAAAAA” Her shrieking laughter echoed off the trees, until it was cut short by hacking coughs.

“Damnit Dad. What the hell was all that? I know you know how to make fuses.” She looked around. “Where are you? Also, where are my clothes?” She got no answers. She carefully picked her way out of the ruins, stopping when she found an unexploded vial.

Silivian Alcheium. Rare kidney reagent. Effectiveness 3%. Next kidney enhancement at 0% Consume reagent?

“What the fuck was that!” She yelled, dropping the vial.

*DING* Hi Sweetie! If you are hearing this, you have successfully activated the Infinite Development System. Well, I’m still working on the name. Option two is Cosmic Cauldron System. Option Three is World Eater System. If you want to change the default… ask me! If I like your suggestion, I’ll do it.

“Dad?”

*Ding* I am a recording, so if you are trying to ask me any questions, I’m afraid I can’t answer them. You need to learn how to use the system in interesting ways, fueling your growth. I would suggest scavenging around for any reagents you can pick up, and see what hidden systems you can unlock. It’s going to be one wild adventure.

“I… don’t want an adventure. I told you, I wanted to pick a town and settle down. Build a little house with a big library. You know. Maybe meet a boy you don’t try to do experiments on.”

*Ding* Last but definitely not least, I wanted to tell you. Happy birthday, sweetie. Seventeen is an amazing age, and it will be an amazing year for you. I love you so, so much, and I can’t wait to see what kind of world you make. As always, you are my most brilliant creation.

She looked over her burned, bruised, bloody, naked body, then over the burned ruins of the building in the empty, muddy, rain filled clearing. She was shivering. Pretty soon she was going to be losing dangerous amounts of body heat.

“Thanks Dad. Amazing birthday. Wouldn’t change it for anything.”

*Ding* Last, last thing I promise. I know you will worry about this, so I recorded nine hundred and ninety nine years worth of birthday wishes, just in case you live that long. If you go over that limit, don’t worry, there is a randomizer function so you will always get something new. Also, do be sure to think of yourself as MY most brilliant creation. Your so-called mother contributed nothing. Now go have adventures!

“I am going to beat the absolute shit out of you, old man.” She glared around the clearing. “You better run!”

Two weeks later, in the junkyard outside of Maztal, a young woman strode through the glass-flower wall, into the millenia old pits. Nobody really knew how old the Maztal junkyard was, and that suited Lettie just fine. She picked up this and that, unsatisfied, until she held a broken cup.

*Ding* Unique ceramic detected. A complete chemical and structural analysis can open up new bone improvements. Analyze?

Lettie grinned. “Hell yes.”

Seven grueling months later- “A measly six percent increase in density and durability? What do you even mean durability? And six percent increase against what?! The numbers mean nothing!”

Two years later. A carriage was being chased by armed men with spears on cheve. One rode up alongside- “Forgive me, Prince. For the Crown!” He stabbed in through the window. He pulled the spear back, unbloodied. A copper device with a glass bowl at the end of it faced towards him and briefly glowed a light blue. Then a wide blast of sound and heat shot out, removing everything above the trooper’s nipples. Lettie grinned mirthlessly as she pulled the gun back in.

“Never thought I would marry royalty.”

“Well, it’s a sham, really. I like boys, you see.”

“Oh, what a coincidence, so do I. Want to find one to share?”

The other trooper pulled out a pistol and started shooting into the wagon.

“Delightful idea. After we deal with this fellow, and before our divorce?”

She leaned out and took another shot. She missed, the range was crappy.

“Good plan. Hey, is that real Gondolfini Liquor I saw in the cabinet?”

The prince looked scandalized as he pulled an automatic rifle out from under his seat.

“Madam, the Kingdom does not have the concept of alimony.”

Lettie grinned. And fired again.

Two years after that, a boot slammed through a rotten door in a hovel in the bad (well, worse, really) part of Hueco Ixta. A young woman stomped in and slammed a human head and a clay bottle down on the one shitty table in the shack. The head had an obsidian knife sticking out from between its eyebrows. The jug had a painting of a feathered snake on it. The grizzled old bastard emerging from the bed pointed his crossbow at the floor, thick black eyebrows rising up to almost be lost in his long, greasy hair.

“Shit, lady, what do you want inked?”

“The Grand Temple. All twenty three steps.”

He raised an eyebrow higher, somehow. He then reached out to the jug, popped the stopper, and took a sip. Then a second sip.

“Damn. Yeah, we can do the Temple-”

She raised a finger.

“The real temple. Hieroglyphics and worshipers.”

He frowned, crossbow slightly rising.

“With just this?”

She eyeballed the craggy looking bastard, all two meters of him. She reached into a pocket and pulled out a small wooden box. With great care, she set it on the table, then slowly pulled back the lid. A tiny green frog, barely the size of her thumb nail looked up at them. It croaked.

“Alright, we're doing this thing!”

*Ding* You have unlocked a two percent increase in epidermal resistance to electricity. Congratulations!

“Dad, I swear when I find you, I’m going to smack the hell out of you.” She sniffed, dropping the wires and picking up her glass. “Where the hell are you? It’s been ten years already.”

One year later-*Ding* Quest generation system has generated a new quest!

“Oh damn, I had hoped you were broken. What have you learned, magical eavesdropping system? Another chance to improve toe grip by .05%?”

*Ding* Prospecting in the Ramparts! Multi-Part Open Ended Quest. Rumors of ancient ruins containing profound technologies swirl around the savage peaks of the Western Ramparts. The System can confirm that many, many, many civilizations “hid” their “top secret” research facilities and doomsday bunkers in those granite mountains. Go out there and find something good!

She shook her head. Like hell she was going to-

“Reach for the sky, Lettie! Make me work for it and you die slow.”

“That’s Madam Lettie to you, shit kicker!” She spun and drew, her hands blazing as she fanned the trigger of her pistol. She dropped the first one, but his two buddies were firing back. Not willing to play around with those odds, she drew a black canister out of her belt and threw it at them.

“Take my rads and go!” She screamed, as she dove behind a trough. Then there was an almighty WOMPH, as the flashbang went off. She popped back up and picked off the two blind pricks.

The street was empty after the violence, but she knew that half the town was related to the trio. She looked over at her lousy nag. It wouldn’t get her far, but it should get her to Sky’s Echo. The townsfolk were starting to rush over, some holding pitchforks, others muskets.

“Quest Accepted.”