I felt alone and broken, but what was there to do? I used to wallow in self-pity when feelings such as these came all of sudden, and see how miserable my life was compared to others.

And say to myself, 'Well no wonder you are like this, with how messed up you are. You'll never be as happy nor as good as others'

Yet, all of that talk only made things even worse, even though I managed to numb the pain away by getting high, change was the only constant.

The high was always followed by the low, and that low kept growing and growing until it became unbearable.

I remembered those moments at 8 AM when you did not get any wink of sleep, how bleak life felt. That bleakness and dread could not help but be projected into the future, and you start thinking, 'Is this how my life is going to be?'

However, now it was different. All I could do is sit through it, without feeding it anymore.

Maybe I got triggered because deep down I envied her somewhat.

After all, she felt something for someone.

To feel for someone you need to show yourself to them, open up, be vulnerable, and just be you. To show both the good and bad sides, then and only then does one develop feelings and form connections.

When two individuals look at each other with complete nakedness. I never had that.

As I grew up and started having issues accepting myself, I started thinking of myself as someone not worth knowing, a broken thing that had no worth nor use.

Useless things can only be thrown away.

So, I threw myself out.

Only interacting with people when it was necessary, even when I did was very superficial.

I always felt that other people could tell how dead inside I was, that was why I always felt anxious and awkward. Like I was constantly faking it, but I did not know sure if people knew, I only had suspicions so I had to keep on acting.

I learned how to make friends without actually making them. To put up appearances just not to seem too out of place, to live without meaning anything to anyone nor offending anybody.

To be a nice guy. It might’ve seemed like it was good to be regarded by people as nice but it was not.

It was soul-crushing, you mean nothing to them. You’re only nice because you evoke zero emotional reaction in them. You are bland.

Just like plain rice. You don’t hate it, you don’t love it. It just is.

The worst thing is, that bland flavor is something you gave yourself to push people away, yet through time you start believing a lie you created. It made sense, of course, we are social creatures, and other people's validation does mean a lot to us. Although no one might know who you are because you did not give anyone a chance to see, you start to also judge yourself based on that fake image you created as if it was real.

How messed up and complicated was that? No wonder I used to call myself an introvert and being drained by other people, look at how much effort I was putting into that.

Sigh...

*Swoosh*

The Mama bird came back, carrying the body of the Peak Mandrill.

She looked furious, I could tell that she knew her child died when she made that angry cry before.

I did not even have the energy to think about it.

Rest in peace, brother.

Though our time together was short and I was incapable of truly seeing what you are nor were you able to see who I was, I was a bit sad that you'd never grow up and see yourself.

I did not eat because I was full so I just closed my eyes and started cultivating.

My wing was almost healed up, I regained feeling in it and I could move a bit though with difficulty because it was painful.

I had a question I wanted to ask before

'System, why am I bigger than Kali?'

[You ate more than her, plus due to your Stat boost your speed and degree of absorption are way higher than her.]

I see, It was like using the body I eat more efficiently because I was stronger, it made sense.

It was only the morning, yet a lot of things happened.

It was worth mentioning that, even though it was technically morning, the forest was still dark due to the number of trees, how close they are to each other plus the thickness of the branches/leaves. However, also due to the clouds I think, otherwise, there will definitely be sunlight.

Cultivation felt nice though... It was a good way to keep my mind away from certain things.

Thinking of cultivation...

'System how do I break through to Mid Body Refinement?'

[Due to Stats Boost your strength is already sufficiently high however, your body is still at the Low Body Refinement stage. To be considered Mid all of your physical base Stats need to reach 20 Vitality, Strength and Stamina.]

'Would I get any power increase once I reach it?'

[Not really, no. It's only a measure of the strength of your body because your body needs to reach a certain threshold to cultivate your foundation. However, in higher realms, the conditions for a breakthrough are harder and result in big changes. For example, the difference between Foundation Establishment(Low) which has just broken through, and Body Refinement(Peak) who's close to reaching the next realm is very small. However, the difference between Core Formation(Low) and Foundation Establishment(Peak) is very big and can't be crossed in fights easily.]

Hmm... I see. I think I got a general idea.

'By the way, It's safe to assume that not everyone can see their strength in numbers correct?'

[Yes, no one.]

'Then how accurate are these numbers?'

I was more concerned about HP, resistance, and the damage I dealt.

[It's a bit complex, there are too many variables involved, and numbers are rigid but life is endless and more complex than that. I'll give you an example, You have 100 Intelligence, and your wind blades deal Int x2 meaning 200 damage. Let's assume we have two monsters both with 0 magical resistance, one has a normal body but the other has an organ outside of their very sensitive body. The damage you'd deal with both of them is way different, even though theoretically you'd only deal 200 damage. However, numbers can accurately approximate your base strength and the opponent's, but even then there are other variables, so just keep an eye open.]

I guessed as much because I noticed that when I hit the scales of the snake I didn't do much damage compared to hitting the Mandrills in the throat, even though the latter had higher physical and magical resistance.

Still, numbers did help a lot in estimating my strength.

[+1 Stamina]

Oh? That was the first time I had seen this notification, it was thanks to the cultivation of course.

I still had 11 Stats points and a whole 7 Skill points.

I knew exactly what I'd do with them.

I immediately put 5 Skill points in The Stranger, directly advancing to the Perfection Realm.

[The Stranger(Passive): +50% to all Stats. 5/5]

I now have a total of +150% base Stats, just from The Stranger and Blazing Heart. My other skills boost Agility.

I noticed that I could no longer add more Skill points to it...

'How do I upgrade my Perfection Skills?'

[The Stranger has reached the limit, certain conditions must be met for it to evolve.]

Certain conditions again! Since it said that word it won't tell me what even if I ask.

Now, for the thing, I had been looking forward to the most!

[Sky Dash(Active): Grants +30% Agility for 15 seconds while above ground. Cost(30MP) 2/5]

Its duration increased from 10 to 15 seconds, but this was not why I was looking forward to this!

When I upgraded my skills previously, I noticed that I got some information-like memories like I had been using them for years.

A Sky Dash Beginner can already fly like an expert but I had never flown so it didn't apply to me, now my mind was flooded with memories about using the Sky Dash Intermediate stage.

Yes!! I was very anxious about flying, I'd never done it. The concept of flapping wings and using them to nimbly dance in the sky felt so foreign to me.

But now? It felt like I'd been flying for years.

This feeling was too euphoric.

Another thing why I focused on flying so much was, that Mandrills gather in hordes. What we encountered earlier was no more than dozens of them, I was sure there are more of them.

They won't be coming.

Unless that Peak Body Refinement Monster isn't the alpha but merely a general of a sort, then it's a whole other story.

Looking at Kali resting beside me, I sighed...

I only needed a day or two max and I will grow feathers that would enable me to fly, if shit went south I'd carry her with my claws and bring her somewhere safe.

I continued cultivating and resting. I was not paying attention to my surroundings, it was pointless.

The Mama bird was here and I was sure that she could sense and see farther than I did. So, I took advantage of this opportunity and closed my eyes to sleep.

I noticed that bodies get absorbed faster when I was asleep, even mana regeneration and healing.

It was like the brainwaves in the wakeful state need a lot of energy so when the brain is resting that energy can be put elsewhere, probably.

...

I woke up a while later, I did not know exactly how much time had passed.

Looking up I could tell that it was not nighttime quite yet, there was still some light beyond the trees and in the direction in which the Mandrills ran off earlier.

My wing was completely healed up by then, I could move it around without any discomfort.

I had also grown larger. After all, I did eat three whole bodies, one snake and two Mandrills.

Spreading out my wings, I was overjoyed! I could not fly just yet, but soon! My feathers are even darker, not completely pitch black like the Mama bird but close enough.

I opened up my Status Window to check...

[~Status Window~

Host: Zed - Umbra Storm Eagle(Juvenile).

Titles: {Blazing Heart}

Level: 10

Experience Points(Exp): 1950/6000

Rank: Body Refinement(Low)

Health Points(HP): 135/135

Magic Power(MP/Mana): 182/182

Spiritual Power(SP): 190/190

Magical Resistance: 11(5)

Physical Resistance: 9(4)

Spiritual Resistance: 19(9)

Vitality: 26(39)

Strength: 16(24)

Stamina: 18(27)

Intelligence: 42(63)

Agility: 23(34)

Spirit: 36(54)

Available Stat Points: 11

Available Skill Points: 1

Karma Points: 0

[Skills]

[Quests]

[Map(Locked)]

[Party(Locked)]

[Shop(Locked)]

]

I was getting stronger by the day, the +150% Stats was huge!

I needed to acquire more titles, but I doubt all of them would be as overpowered as Blazing Heart.

That title felt like a push from the system when it felt my determination.

I had 11 undistributed Stats points plus 1 Skill point.

At first, I wanted to increase my Strength and Stamina to 20 to be considered a Mid-stage Body Refinement. However, there won't be any considerable power increase, Agility on the other hand should be prioritized because I had several skills that boost it, and my wings were almost fully developed.

The moment I placed my remaining 11 points in Agility, I could feel my body changing. More firm, nimble, and most importantly lighter.

I had 34 base Agility, and if we added the +150% then it was a huge 85 points in Agility.

From the information; I gathered in my previous appraisals, I figured that I could safely get away from a High-rank Body Refinement realm monster.

If we also calculate my other skills, mainly Bird of Darkness, Zephyr Child, and Sky Dash, then it'd be an extra 6, 6, and 10 respectively.

In other words, My ultimate max speed was a staggering 107!

As long as I did not meet any Peak-level monsters, I could safely run away!

I still had one Skill point left, where should I put it? Remembering how I was easily discovered the last time, even though I thought I was hidden, I immediately advanced [Mask Presence] from Beginner to Intermediate.

[Mask Presence(Passive): Masks the presence of the user to a certain extent in the dark. 2/5]

[+1 Strength, +1 Vitality]

Sweet, I now had 17 Strength and 18 Stamina.

Only a couple of points and I'll break through to the Mid Body Refinement Stage.

I went towards the body of a Vunamian Mandrill or at least what remained of it and ate it.

I still needed more, I stood on the edge of the edge looking down below. I found nothing, I closed my eyes and stretched my senses trying to find something.

Fortunately, I did find a body. It was the Mandrill that was too injured to move and died by my hands. The problem was, it was on the ground below, behind the tree in front of the side.

If I want to eat it, I needed to get down there.

Going down was easy, climbing up on the other hand...

I need it, so before going down I will practice climbing on these trees.

I walked on the branch, slowly step by step until I approached the bark of the tree.

I noticed that the Mama eagle who was previously closing her eyes was watching me. I think she was cultivating before.

I bit down with my beak and then planted my claws into the bark of the tree, but to climb up I need something to hold on to so that I can bite higher and keep climbing. At first, I thought of using my wings, but the bark was too damn wide, I could not get a grip!

Shit! I couldn't climb, it was frustrating.

I started flapping up and down with all of my strength and soon my body started to rise from the branch a bit!

I just rose for less than 5 centimeters and fell. It was too taxing for just that little altitude!

I need that body!!

Suddenly, I had a bold idea!