[ZERO SPACE]

Kicking a knight’s metal helmet was a bad idea, but Shae tried it anyway. The helmet was made of steel. Shae’s ankle was made of bone and meat.

The resounding impact shattered Shae’s ankle and alerted five additional knights. Red eyes from their visors cast a crimson spotlight on a barren castle courtyard. Rolling storm clouds draped them in shadow.

Each knight carried a rusty sword – they were dull weapons, but still capable of slicing through Shae’s flashy clothing. Shae didn’t wear armor like most people. On his budget, he had to choose between looks and protection. The former was cheaper, but Shae was paying for it now.

With his back against the ground, Shae fired two purple pistols. An endless stream of bullets ricocheted off knight armor, chipping away at stone walls.

Shae’s pistols were a vanity purchase. Unlimited ammo, at the expense of strength. They were stronger than paintballs, but less effective than a well-placed blade. At least they were purple; Shae liked that color.

There was one more trick up Shae’s fancy sleeve. He observed the knights through oversized sunglasses, aiming a pistol high.

“PIERCING SHOT!” he screamed.

A violet bullet erupted from one of Shae’s guns, forming a sizzling hole in a knight’s skull. Red eyes grew dull as metal and meat collapsed into a smoldering scrap heap.

“Yes!” Shae whispered. One knight down. But several more to go, and Shae was on his last leg. He cursed himself for not using his power earlier, when there was just one knight.

Shae wasn’t alone either - he had friends. Or at least he used to, before he ditched them all. They were supposed to stay together. But no, Shae had to go and be the hero. Several months of effort were now jeopardized by Shae’s ‘heroics’.

This would be the perfect time for his friends to show up and save him. That’s how these things worked, right? It was always in the nick of time. Any second now.

The first knight’s boot touched down on his injured leg. The next, on his groin. Then several more switched it up, altering between his torso and face.

Shae wasn’t worthy of knight swords. No point in wearing down weapons when a series of simple stomps would do. Eventually, there wasn’t much left of Shae to stomp on. Just pulpy meat and flattened flesh, pouring out from flashy pants and a dressy jacket.

Satisfied, the knights returned towards to their patrols –

-- A long orange sword relieved two knights of their guard duty. A war hammer crashed down on another knight’s skull. A wooden staff fractured two more armored legs.

Asira landed between two knights, brandishing a sharp stare, concealed behind two sharper swords. She was a pteranoid – a fuzzy pterodactyl-like creature with human arms and legs. Her long wings extended outwards; her reptilian snout released a vicious snarl.

Orange clothing covered every inch of her body, leaving only her eyes exposed. She was a ninja – in title only. Her color didn’t lend well to stealth. But she was good with swords; that was ninja-enough for her.

Asira’s swords met two knight weapons halfway, simultaneously blocking their attack, and opening them up to –

-- Umi’s war hammer. Armor shattered like glass beneath his massive weapon, stacking several knight bodies in a neat little pile. This wasn’t a weapon meant for human hands. This was a weapon meant for brutoids, like Umi.

Brutoids were large and bestial humanoids. Six eyes, four arms, two legs; a formidable race. They paid for their strength with reduced speed. It was easy to make fun of Brutoids, because it was easy to get away from them.

A single knight tripped backwards over something hard and wooden – Bander’s staff. Bander flashed the knight a smile, then flattened its skull with several staff swings.

Bander was a magicoid, a small and adorable race. Most magicoids didn’t like being called adorable. Especially Bander. What magicoids lacked in strength, they made up for with powerful magic. What Bander lacked in size, he made up for with a massive robe. It gave onlookers the illusion that he was four feet tall, instead of three.

As the last knight fell, Asira breathed a sigh of relief. They couldn’t afford to lose anyone else. Eight of them had entered this castle - their party was now down to four, and that was including Shae’s corpse.

Asira’s orange swords whipped through the air, spinning several times before sliding into their sheaths with impossible accuracy. This flourish was wasted on her defeated opponents. She had a bad habit of doing fancy sword stuff when her foes were no longer around to see it.

“Alright, where is that idiot?” Bander asked.

Umi stepped in a pile of Shae. “Found him!” The brutoid laughed, scraping off his boot with the top of his hammer.

“Called it,” Bander grumbled.

“Just bring him back please,” said Asira.

Angelic white energy gathered around the tip of Bander’s staff. He raised it to a sudden fanfare of angelic voices and trumpets. Rays of light pierced through the storm clouds, creating a holy haze on the battlefield below. Meaty matter ascended into the air, distorting and churning until it once again resembled the entity known as Shae.

Shae was a humanoid. Or just a human, for short. Humanoids were disadvantaged, compared to other races; they had no unique features to assist them in combat. It was too late to change that now however. Shae’s outfit over-compensated for his vanilla species-choice.

Bander watched Shae’s reformation with weary eyes. He had seen this spectacle dozens of times this week. Most of those times, for Shae.

Shae awoke with a gasp –

-- His gasp was cut short by Bander’s foot, shoving him back into the ground.

“Shae, next time you do this, I’m going to resurrect you somewhere weird,” Bander growled.

“We all will,” warned Asira. She didn’t know what she meant by that, but her intent was clear.

“Maybe you all should get better at keeping up with me,” said Shae.

“You and me are support, idiot” Bander snarled. “Let Asira and Umi do the heavy lifting.”

“I love heavy-lifting!” shouted Umi.

“Well, maybe I’m sick of taking up the rear,” Shae said.

“You’re about to take my staff up your rear…”

“Enough!” yelled Asira. “We’re running out of time. We need to finish this, like, now.”

“Yeah, I gotta pee real bad,” said Umi.

A dark shape passed overhead, too distant to make out. It wouldn’t be distant for long.

“Riz’aeoth… he’s getting closer,” Asira warned. “If he reaches us before the cliffside arena, we’re super screwed.”

The route ahead opened into darkness. Two sets of stairs - one ascending towards the castle’s exterior wall, and another leading down into the castle barracks.

“We have to split up here,” said Asira. “Umi, you’ll take the barracks with me. Bander, please take the wall with Shae.”

Shae had dreaded those words. It wasn’t just the thought of working with Bander. He knew how high up that castle wall was. Not all the armor in the world could save someone from a fall like that. That was his justification for not wearing armor.

“Do I really have to pair with Bander?” asked Shae.

“You two need the practice together,” Asira replied. “And if either of you die on the wall, I’m reporting you both to Chief.”

Bander and Shae grew tense. Chief was far scarier than Asira. Angering Chief could result in weeks of menial labor, humiliation, or even temporary expulsion. And those were the best case scenarios.

“Don’t worry,” said Umi. “Ledgess will watch over you!”

Umi held up a blue rosary around his neck. A smiling turquoise dog with sunglasses – this was Umi’s deity, Ledgess. Umi prayed to this thing, and he wasn’t the only one. Many others shared Umi’s puppy-idol passion, and they rarely worshipped in silence. The party groaned as Umi recited a lengthy prayer; none of them dared interrupt.

Another roar from the restless clouds ended Umi’s prayer mercifully early. “Amen!” he shouted.

Shae massaged his temple with the tip of his pistol. “Could me and Bander at least not take the high –“

Too late. Asira and Umi were already racing down the barracks stairs.

“Come on, you idiot,” yelled Bander, already halfway to their assigned destination. Shae followed with faint hope that this route wouldn’t be as bad as he expected.

It was far worse. The castle wall offered a spectacular view of the forest below - it towered higher than any tree. A thousand foot death-drop, into an endless void of pine.

The clouds released an onslaught of torrential rain, coating the walkway in a slick wet surface. A single wrong step would send Shae or Bander sliding off the wall, into the worst possible death. A fatal fall into a legion of sharp trees below. Getting closer, and closer, until –

SMACK

Bander’s staff came down on Shae’s head.

“Focus on the path ahead, you idiot,” snarled Bander. “I can’t revive you if you fall down there.”

A horde of soldiers blocked the way, aligned into an exploitable formation. These soldiers were nothing to worry about. Simple humans, in simple clothing, with simple weapons. A potential challenge for inexperienced fighters, but easy enough for a pistol wielder of any skill level.

Shae’s guns twirled around his fingertips. He took a step forward –

-- Bander’s staff intercepted him.

“I’ve got this,” grinned Bander. “Watch my back.”

Bander let out a cute little war cry, mowing down soldiers with acrobatic staff strikes. It wasn’t often that Bander could dominate weaker opponents with melee attacks, and he wouldn’t be denied that pleasure.

Shae sighed, finishing off stray soldiers with lazy bullets. He watched Bander’s back, as promised. Watching him twirl through an onslaught of easy enemies, energized with kinetic glee. Bander was hogging all the glory, as usual.

Just then, Shae saw it – the perfect shot. An irresistible opportunity. It was a tough shot, but Shae knew he could do it. He just had to believe in himself. He lined it up, and –

BANG

Right into Bander’s ass.

Bander hollered in pain. It was a bad idea, but Shae had no regrets. He just had to choose between admitting it was intentional, or admitting he was a terrible shot.

“Shae, what the hell?” Bander yelled.

“Sorry, didn’t see you there,” Shae replied.

CRASH

A heavy flail head landed inches away from Bander’s feet. This flail head was larger than Bander’s torso, and half the size of its bearer – a giant knight in ruby red armor, the same color as its eyes.

“Wait, this knight isn’t supposed to be here,” said Bander.

“Looks new,” Shae responded. “Let’s kill it!”

Bander was way ahead of him. And Shae was grateful for that – he didn’t want to be anywhere near the knight. He bounced several bullets off the knight’s armor. They didn’t do much damage, but Shae’s intention wasn’t to maim - it was to distract.

Bander took advantage of the situation and his own size, sliding across the rain-soaked ground, through the knight’s legs. His staff cracked across the knight’s helmet. A powerful hit! But it wasn’t enough.

The knight countered with a brutal kick into Bander’s sternum. That kick would have exploded most magicoids, but Bander took it like a champ. The impact however, left him sprawled out across the castle wall with several fractured ribs. Coughing out blood and rain, Bander’s staff rose to ward off the approaching knight.

Shae was enjoying the show, but his ass was on the line too. He couldn’t imagine what Chief would do to him if he failed. Or what this knight would do to him.

His pistols charged up with a forbidden purple power.

“PIERCING SHOT!”

A violet bullet emerged. Penetrated raindrops exploded like fireworks in the stormy sky. The knight’s armor followed suit, a violet streak cutting through one end of the knight’s chest, and then out the other, before finally, cutting through the middle of Bander’s raised staff, splintering it into a thousand wooden pieces.

The knight collapsed, allowing Shae to see –

-- Bander. Gripping his stump of a staff. Those little magicoid eyes were no longer adorable. They were adorable, and angry.

“Shae, you idiot!” Bander screamed.

“Wait, I didn’t mean to…”

Bander was on him in seconds, struggling to pry the pistol free from his hands. Shae fought back against the magicoid’s surprising strength. But Bander wasn’t fighting fair; Bander was biting.

“Ow, stop! I swear, I didn’t mean to do it that time!”

“That time? I knew you shot me on purpose!”

A dark figure swooped through the clouds, oblivious to the drama below.

“I just meant to graze you.”

“I’m about to graze your face with my…”

BANG

Shae’s pistol fired. An unintentional bullet, released in the struggle. The bullet missed Bander’s head by inches. What it didn’t miss, was the large creature in the sky.

An angry roar bellowed from above. Like most living things, this creature wasn’t happy about being shot.

Shae and Bander’s eyes met. This was the first time either of them had seen eye to eye in a while. For once, their heads were in the same place.

Run.

Shae and Bander separated as a fireball tore through the clouds, exploding only a few feet behind them. The castle wall collapsed at their back, giving Shae an uninhibited look at the forest below. Vertigo-induced shivers slivered up his spine, sending him into a dizzied dance away from its edge.

Bander squeaked as Shae stepped on his hand. The magicoid’s injured ribs had finally caught up with him, and his staff wasn’t around to heal him. Shae knew there was no way Bander would make it on his own. Fortunately, Bander was small.

Shae scooped Bander up in his arms and took off in a sprint, another passing fireball dousing his body in red light. He hurdled over fallen soldiers, stepped over slippery puddles, and bounded over the dead ruby knight. However, his feet failed to notice the ruby knight’s flail. Its long chain snagged Shae’s foot, causing him to face-plant against slick stone. Bander slid out of his grip, off the edge of the wall, and into the unforgiving forest below.

That was it. Bander was dead. And that meant Shae was dead.

“Shae!” Bander cried out.

Bander’s cry came from beyond the wall. Shae crawled on all fours, inching towards the wall’s edge, to discover –

-- Bander. Still alive. Hanging from a loose piece of stone, becoming looser.

“Shae…”

“I’ve got you!” Shae promised. But he didn’t mean that. Bander was just a little too far over the edge for Shae’s to reach – curse Bander’s short magicoid arms.

Shae looked past Bander’s terrified eyes, into the dizzying fall beyond. He wouldn’t wish a fate like that on his worst enemy. Bander was his worst friend, but a friend regardless.

Thinking quick, Shae snatched up the very flail that tripped him. This flail was even heavier than Umi’s weapon. The flail head was firmly rooted in the ground; there was no way Shae could lift it. And that’s what he was counting on.

Shae tossed the flail’s handle over the wall’s edge. Bander’s fingers curled around it, transporting his full weight onto it as the loose stone broke free, plummeting into the endless blackness below.

“Climb up!” yelled Shae.

“I can’t, idiot,” responded Bander. “You stepped on my hand!”

Another explosion - this one from up ahead. The flying creature’s fireballs were striking down in random locations. One of them was bound to get lucky soon.

Shae peered down at Bander, dangling from the chain. The thought of falling returned to his mind. He dry-heaved in Bander’s direction.

“Don’t you dare!” warned Bander.

Sucking in his gut, Shae took hold of the flail’s chain. Several tugs later, Bander was back in his arms. Shae dry heaved again - this one was not completely dry.

“Damn it, you idiot!” Bander screamed. “This is why you don’t eat before a mission!”

The staircase down from the castle wall was just ahead - this nightmare was almost over. But before the staircase, there was a massive hole, carved out by a rogue fireball. This would be a difficult leap for Shae alone. Bander’s weight made it that much harder.

Another roar from above. Two huge red eyes pierced through the rolling storm clouds. If Shae could see those eyes, he was certain the creature could see him too. It wasn’t going to miss again.

“Don’t just stand there, idiot,” Bander yelled. “Go. Now!”

Shae stopped thinking and started running. His feet touched down on the edge of the hole. Both knees bent inwards with gathered momentum, and then uncoiled, springing him and Bander across the chasm, as a fireball ruptured the wall behind him.

He dove onto the staircase, sending both him and Bander into an unstoppable topple. The stairs seemed endless; Shae and Bander met every one of them with a different part of their bodies.

Bander arrived at the bottom first, becoming Shae’s involuntary landing pad. Only Bander’s ribs were broken before. Who knew what else was broken now? But Bander was still alive. Shae hadn’t technically failed Asira’s criteria.

Shae wasn’t in great shape himself. He sat up on his ally, taking time to address his wounds, before addressing the needs of the angry magicoid below him.

A door ahead smashed open. Asira emerged, by herself. Both teams met with puzzled expressions.

“Shae?” Asira asked puzzled. “Where’s Bander?”

Shae pointed below him. “He’s alive.”

Shae was ejected from Bander by a much-deserved punch to the groin.

“Where’s Umi?” Bander asked.

Asira didn’t respond. She brushed her wing with her sword. This usually meant she was hiding something, or had an itch.

“Asira?” Bander asked again.

“I couldn’t save him,” Asira cried. “I didn’t realize that place would be so well guarded.”

“It’s the guard barracks,” Shae groaned. “Guard barracks are full of guards”

“Yes, I know, but there were more than there should have been,” Asira said. “Something changed here!”

A distant roar demanded their attention.

“We don’t stand a chance without Umi,” Bander said. “Let’s just call it.”

“No,” Asira insisted. “We made it this far. Let’s see what we can do.”

Asira drew her two swords, making sure to spin them in Shae and Bander’s view.

“How much healing do you have left?” Asira asked Bander.

“I had plenty,” Bander said. “Until Shae shot my staff!”

“It was an accident!” shouted Shae. “Also, I only have one piercing shot left.”

“Just one?” groaned Asira.

“You were supposed to be saving those, idiot!” Bander snarled.

“I had to save myself first,” said Shae. “And I only need one. I won’t miss.”

Asira sighed, admiring her reflection in her orange swords. A bright energy washed over her blades, then faded away.

“We can still do this,” Asira said.

Another roar. This time, from somewhere up ahead.

“Asira, it’s impossible,” said Bander.

“Come with me, or I’ll report you to Chief.”

That settled that.

The three of them stepped forward into a large stone arena, built along the edge of a cliff. Shae found himself face to face with another massive drop, only this time, it was obscured by a dense gray fog, concealing a view of the thrashing ocean below. Not being able to see the fall somehow helped put Shae’s mind at ease.

“Raz’aeoth,” Asira shouted. “We’re here. Come out!”

No one responded. The party’s nervous eyes scanned the surrounding fog.

“It’s not working,” Bander said. “I swear, it wasn’t this hard to get Raz’aoth’s attention before. Did something else change?”

Shae had one of his rare, good ideas. He fired random shots into the fog. Asira and Bander watched in horror, too stunned to dissuade him.

Bullets swirled through the air, assimilated into the mist, until finally –

THUMP

One of them hit something. Something that didn’t like to be shot.

A pair of large red eyes opened in the fog. These eyes were even bigger up close.

“Here he comes,” yelled Asira. “Remember the plan!”

A mighty roar echoed across the arena. Large wings beat away clumps of dense fog.

“Our plan involved Umi!” Bander yelled. “And my staff, for healing!”

A fireball divided the group, all of three of them diving in different directions.

“We’ll improvise!” yelled Asira.

The large shape drifted in and out of the fog. Sometimes it was visible, sometimes it was not. Shae shot at it regardless.

“I can’t tell if I’m hitting it,” Shae yelled.

“On it!” yelled Asira. Her two swords came together, producing a pale glow. Orange light shot forward, piercing through the clouds, revealing –

-- A giant blue dragon. Big, blue, and scaly. Just about as generic and terrifying as a dragon could be. Shae unloaded every last bullet he had into it, and then some.

“We need Umi for this!” Shae screamed.

“I told you!” Bander added. “We’re screwed!”

The dragon was tired of being shot. It emerged from the mist, revealing its massive body. It was at least one hundred Banders long.

Asira’s swords slammed together, shining a beam of light into the dragon’s eyes. The dragon didn’t like that. It turned towards Asira, diving towards her with lethal speed.

Asira maintained a deep focus, staring right into the dragon’s eyes. She was ready for it. Waiting for just the right moment. And then, at last –

-- The dragon’s fist came down. Asira exploded into red mist, her remaining atoms leaving a bloody stain on the arena floor.

“Oh shit,” yelled Shae.

Something snapped inside of Bander. He threw rocks at the dragon as it passed, missing with every one of them.

“Wheeeeeee,” yelled Bander. Bander didn’t have Shae’s fear of heights. He demonstrated this by vaulting himself over the edge of the cliff.

It was down to just Shae. But Shae had a plan. One last shot to save himself. One last chance to be a hero.

Shae held his pistols steady, aiming towards the dragon’s eyes. This wasn’t going to be easy. But he knew he could do it. He just had to believe in himself.

“PIERCING SHOT!”

BANG

A violet bullet soared through the air, tunneling through thick fog, before disappearing into its misty mass. Shae had missed. A simple test of skill, and he had failed it. There was no one left for Shae to blame but himself.

The dragon’s head reared back, then unleashed a blanketing wall of fire. It enveloped the arena, the castle, and everything beyond.