《Ode to Fallen Angels》Chapter 19: Of an Escape (Part 2)
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Time was of the essence. Baraqiel couldn’t waste a single second, but their mind was doing circles on itself! They really should stop Gabrielle, but staying in one place meant that the Demiurge could find them much, much more easily; but following their current route was leading them straight to him! But then, what to do!? As the girl carried them, the “angel” decided to try and tug on her for a bit.
Plan A: Logic.
“Can’t we go to your house instead? It can’t be that far away!” First, trying to appeal to the girl’s logic. She couldn’t be that daft, right!?“I live right here in the chapel, your small-ness. Do not be afraid, you will be safe there.”
Strike one!
Logic wouldn’t save them, because logic was actively working against them now! Baraqiel’s mind drifted loudly, trying to steer the conversation away from “home” now, but how!?
Plan B: Sincerity.
I could always tell her of that bastard…
The easy choice, but what if this girl was working in tandem with the Demiurge? She did live with him, after all! Well, maybe it was because of fear or endearment, but Baraqiel was really praying that wasn’t the case. Their heart wouldn’t be able to take a betrayal like that, not now. Besides, if she really did know of the experiments, why would she be so determined to help them instead of calling for the Demiurge directly?
No matter. Things weren’t as easy as taking that leap of faith now, no matter what arguments the child had.
So, plan C. Bargain!
“Maybe it’s best to go somewhere else? A place with fewer people…”
Barracks, a hospice, a gods damned tavern! The child did not care at all, as long as it wasn’t that church abandoned by any sense of love and/or sanity.
“The closest place like that is Gwynedd. The city doesn’t have lots of people… but it is very far away, your shivering-ness. You will freeze before we get there.”
Strike two!
Baraqiel felt the need to smack themself in the face. Of course! It made sense in the most disgusting way: why would the Demiurge do his terrible experiments anywhere close to other humans that could intervene? He was insane, but he wasn’t stupid: he knew people would feel disgusted by his tirades.
That would also explain why no one ever came to check for them…
Alright then, plan D! Fear!
“Are you sure the Father of this Chapel will like the idea of you bringing someone home…?”
Yes, the Demiurge may act and pretend all he wanted, but there were things impossible to hide from others: and that man just exuded aggression. There’s no way his violent, vindictive nature was a secret for this girl, even if she didn’t know of the experiments at all!
“Father doesn’t like many things.” The girl stated, matter-of-factly. “He will probably yell at me, or kick me, but I can take it. As soon as I tell him you’re an angel, you will be fine.”
Strike three! Wanna try again?
For a second, Baraqiel had to stop and recognize this girl’s spunk. It took a special, endearing kind of dumb to put yourself in the line for a perfect stranger, and the kid wasn’t sure if they should feel happy or devastated by this. At least it was a way to confirm she wasn’t working with the guy.
But all these positive feelings were flushed away by the realization that they were growing closer to the corner of the chapel, and the entrance was probably there, waiting for them.
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Plan E! Just… uhm… make something up!
“Gabrielle, wait! I’m… I’m… allergic to churches!!!”
The angel yelled a bit louder than they intended, just blurting out the first thing that came to mind. And surprisingly, this did work! The girl stopped all motions for a second, blinking slowly and processing those words.
Until.
“...What does “allergic” mean, your wordy-ness?”
…Sigh.
Yeah. That one’s on me.
With a feeling of defeat over their shoulders, and taking the chance, Baraqiel decided that there was literally no point in making up complicated lies. Gabrielle would either not-understand them or power through them with her well-intentioned determination.
So. Back to plan B: Spit it, Baraqiel.
“Gabrielle. I cannot go in there. Please.”
“Why not.”
The girl went straight to the point, and Baraqiel was convinced it was the only way Gabi knew how to talk to others. With a slow, deep breath, they decided to stick to the truth. But, how to break that truth to this girl? Was she innocent enough to be harmed by these images? Couldn’t be the case, if she looked at them in such a sorry state and immediately assumed they were an “angel” of sorts.
“Have you ever heard screams in your chapel, Gabrielle?”
—
The girl narrowed her eyes for a moment there, meditating on her answer carefully. Screams? The other girls were incredibly noisy, running around from side to side while laughing and fighting with each other, and the nuns often yelled at them for it! But that couldn’t be what the Angel meant, right? Then…
Wait… could it be, did they mean her screams…?
Now hold on a second, Gabi. You’re not supposed to speak of the Basement, to anyone. Or the Father will know.
Doubts started to cloud the girl’s world, like the storm that raged all around them a few moments ago. The Father had been intense in his effort to make one thing clear: talking about the Basement was bad, and it didn’t matter what, when or why, she was not supposed to say a thing! Or else she would be punished.
Or worse: she would never Ascend like the others.
While the physical rain had died down so much that one could feel the weakest rays of moonlight, Gabrielle’s brain had its very own thunderbolts and lightning.
The Angel spoke again.
“Have you ever been in the room under the Chapel, Gabrielle?”
Gabi’s body tensed even harder, feeling hard as stone. The punishment: a slap, a hit, or a kick. They didn’t hurt, or at least that’s what the girl tried to repeat over and over to herself to not make a sound: they didn’t hurt, no matter how swollen her spots get, no matter how red, black or blue, they didn’t hurt.
And yet she felt afraid, trembling, her breathing starting to pick up louder, and louder.
They’re testing you, they really are testing you. If you say a word they will tell on you. But if you don’t, you will be lying to an Angel. This is a test for a wicked girl, for a bad witch!
—
Gabrielle’s facade of neutrality broke down right in front of Baraqiel’s eyes, her lack of emotions pushed aside by overwhelming fear and stress. The breathing, the way she bit her lower lip, her body refusing to budge. The “angel” had seen it all before, they had felt it all too. The paralyzing horror of incoming punishment, fear of pain and consequences away from their control.
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This girl was not an accomplice to the Demiurge: she was but another victim, in some more insidious way.
“Hey… hey, Gabrielle. Listen to me.” The Angel spoke softly, almost in a whisper, their hand rubbing the girl’s back. “You are not in trouble… alright? I am not going to tell Him anything. I promise.”
The words took a moment to echo deep enough in the girl’s psyche, the deepest breath flowing out of her lungs. Relief was returning to her, but Baraqiel could tell from a single glimpse into her eyes that this wasn’t enough.
So they whispered again, uttering words they always wanted to hear.
“I am on your side, alright? I am with you.”
—
On my side.
Gabrielle’s skin was so tense it hurt, as if someone was pulling from all possible directions, squeezing the girl within. But these words made it stop, slowly, forcing her body to wind down and her thoughts to come to a very sudden stop. On her side, with her. Some kids had tried to tell this lie to her before! Some nuns too, mostly to get her to tell on other girls.
But this felt different… mostly because of the way Baraqiel spoke. They didn’t yell, they didn’t sting with their words at all, never rushing or hitting her. Maybe it was, again, because she had covered her terrible hair from the Angel’s sight, but this wouldn’t be enough to hide it from them right?
Maybe… maybe they were actually on her side. And maybe she could trust them.
With pain abandoning the girl’s limbs, and the rain stopping for good that night, Gabi took a deep breath and spoke, feeling the calm return to her face.
“Yes, your kindness. I have been in the Basement many times but… I am sorry. I have never been able to properly do it.” She confessed. “I cannot ascend no matter what I try.”
“Ascend?” Baraqiel blinked softly.
“Yes, your highness. I always wake up back in my bed after feeling the light in my body.”
Gabrielle could feel a shift in the “angel”’s stance, but couldn’t really put a name or reason to it. She simply couldn’t understand, or maybe even see, the frustration and anger flowing into the kid’s balled fists.
To make it sound so grand and martyr-like. Baraqiel growled under their breath, pieces starting to connect and make much more sense now in their head. That’s how that bastard keeps her quiet.
After mulling on that feeling for a while, Baraqiel finally spoke up.
“So you have never been in the second room, then.”
“There’s a second room?” Gabrielle’s eyebrows rose. Clearly, there was a lot more to Ascension than she could ever understand. “Is that where the Ascended go?”
Baraqiel sighed, once again taking their time to talk. There was no way to soften that punch, so they may as well simply say it and be done with it.
“The ‘Ascended’ as you call them? They get pulled into that second room and connected to some bigger contraption. And then, they have to do this thing again, over and over, for days…”
Bigger Contraption? Gabrielle understood that part easily, the Angel was talking about the Coordinator Spire! The machine Father used to try and attune them to… something. Something that had to do with Ascending, for sure! But, Gabi thought one only had to endure it once or twice before Ascending, right?
Was this Angel saying that “Ascending” meant being connected to the machine again? But for longer, never returning from the machine. The one time Father spoke of this, he said that Ascension was the greatest honor, and it meant a relief that lasted forever more.
No way it was a lie… all of it!? Not a single truth!? Was it all for naught!?
A wave of primal anger shook the girl, trying to make her just drop this “angel” off her body and denounce their lies! All of these words had to be lies, right!? Because if they weren’t, that meant Father was the liar! And if he was, then… then…
No… No, Baraqiel is not lying. What would an Angel win by lying?
Anger towards the Angel sublimated into something else, something even worse: disappointment in life itself. A feeling so bitter, so intense, it squeezed Gabi’s heart and lungs at once, making her choke slightly on the pain as her knees gave, touching the muddy floor.
The Angel carefully patted her shoulder. She felt like jerking away from the motion this time but didn't have the power to do so. Right then, she didn’t have the power for anything.
“I am sorry, Gabrielle.”
“Why… Why is he doing this!? Why would he do this to us!?”
Baraqiel gently looked at her through the holes of her helmet, shushing the girl gently. She nodded, of course. They couldn’t wake up the others!
“Sorry, your quiet-ness.”
Not as hard to talk to as I thought…! said the “angel” in their own mind. They were starting to see how to get through the girl’s thick skull, in a way much more effective than just shouting.
“I… do not know,” Baraqiel confessed. “I spent so long in there and yet, I have no idea what he is after. All I know is that he was trying to make something happen, and failing. Over, and over.”
“Wait, you were there!?!?” The girl had to be shushed once more. She nodded. “Sorry… But, really, you were? Is that where you came from?”
Baraqiel nodded, and as they did, Gabrielle’s mind raced around two possibilities: The first one was that this “angel” was just a kid, like her! Someone who had been trapped in there for a very, very long time and now somehow escaped. The other possibility? The machine was making angels! And this Angel was the first one that was produced by it.
As much as she wanted to believe the second possibility, it was clear even for her that this was all just torture.
“I was the only one who escaped, the others are still down there…” Baraqiel kept going. “I will go back for them, but first I need to rest, and hide before that monster grabs us. The Demiurge…”
The word.
The word echoed in Gabrielle’s mind as her body tensed once again. The vision, it was all connected.
“Please help me Gabrielle, just. I don’t know where, but take me away from this place! I need you…!”
Everything came to a sudden stop. The Moon was almost fully visible in the skies above, and Gabrielle felt as if it was a giant eye just, staring at her, waiting. Judging.
Ohh Saint Martha… what would you do now…?
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