《Humans Must Adapt!》Chapter 82: Hair Trigger
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She slams the arm into my newly made socket, and a jolt of pain goes through my body. I feel like I'm bleeding somewhere. I wiggle the fingers of the arm and start moving it up and down.
"What do you mean by biomechanical. It's not a living thing, is it?"
I examine the arm almost like It'll talk like Flash Gordon, who's floating next to me.
"No. It's an alchemical product that has the potential to imitate living tissue. Unfortunately, it's almost unresponsive to enchantments or modifications, but I have my tricks.
I activate [Scientific Insight+]
[Biomechanical Arm (Left)]
No rank and no description, meaning that this item's information has been hidden by somebody, probably the creator standing next to me.
"What does it do?"
"First of all, you have to understand what it means that it's biomechanical. Your blood should be flowing through the arm. Treat it like your old arm, but it happens to be made of metal. It should also match your mana after a grace period, allowing you to use skills from it or apply various passives if you have any."
I am enamored. I can feel heat and cold from this thing instead of only pressure. It's not perfect, but it's almost perfect.
"However, since It's metal, I made modifications to it. Adding enchantments like spell storage or attribute increase is almost impossible with the metal, so be happy with what you have. Try to figure it out on your own."
I looked over it with a keener eye and spotted a seam that didn't belong. I pushed my finger in, and to my surprise, it gave away to a compartment. It's small and tight, but it's reminiscent of a... No, it couldn't be.
"Is this a-"
"Here."
She hands me a shotgun shell, and I almost lose my mind.
This woman added a gun to my arm. I know I gave her artistic liberties with my arm, but how does this even work?
"Now what?"
"It's like flexing a muscle you have never had before. Your body should know how to rack and fire the shell."
I focus and maneuver my hand until something clicks in my mind, and I misfire out of my palm, blasting away some old junk in the corner. The tip of a barrel recedes into my palm and seamlessly disappears.
I get smacked in the back of the head by Rain.
"Fucking hair trigger. Do that outside."
"Sorry, but that's cool as fuck. How practical is it against monsters?"
"Depends on the ammunition. It's universal with what it can take if it doesn't blow up inside the arm. Just don't be sticking anything in there."
"Yes, ma'am."
"There are a few things you missed. Flex only the tips of your fingers."
I do so, and my fingertips become sharpened to a point. It's sharp enough to cut my skin, so I'm already impressed. The feeling of bleeding fades as this arm is undoubtedly mine now.
"So how do I detach it, and what happens to my blood?"
"Just think of it like a normal arm."
"..."
"How do I do maintenance on my arm."
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"Don't, or come back to me, so I have a reason to charge you. And when you can't pay, I get a test subject."
"Now that our transaction is done, I have a few questions."
"It seems you've been asking them already. What's up."
"Do you know where I can find an appraiser or buy some scrolls?"
"Are you planning to get your arm appraised? You probably shouldn't since most appraisers in low-level cities like these are scammers or incompetent. Do you even have money for scrolls? I haven't seen you wear anything else besides that gui."
"..."
"I'll give you five credits if you drink this."
She hands me a vial of something, and I pop the whole thing in my mouth and chew without hesitation.
"..."
"It tastes like shit."
"That vial was probably five credits, so forget about payment."
Before I could retort, my scalp and face felt unbearably itchy.
"Oh fuck, what is that?"
"Usually, people ask that before taking subsistences from strangers."
"But you're not a stranger."
"... just ride it out. You'll thank me."
I haven't de-toggled my [Broken Liver], and it's too late now. I realized what potion Rain gave me when hair started violently growing out of my face and head. The potion stopped working when my hair reached the ground. The entire process took less than a minute.
"What the fuck?"
"You tell me. That potion was supposed to grow your hair or make you bald, but this is ridiculous."
"Make me what?"
"Don't worry about it. What's male pattern baldness going to do to your bald ass."
"I thought that hair growth potions were expensive. Why were you willing to give me money to drink it, besides the gamble?"
"Honesty, you look like shit without hair. If I was going to slap one of my creations to someone, they shouldn't look like a monk that got kicked out because their appearance tempted others to kick his ass."
"Was it that bad? Now I look like a hermit that aged backward?"
"At least you can now cut and style your hair, and yeah, it wasn't pretty. You aren't the most macho man, and without hair, you looked like an ambiguous cancer patient."
"Holy shit."
"Don't look at me like that. Doctors made vaccines for that shit a long time ago. I'm busy tomorrow, so you have to leave now."
"Oh, one last thing. What do you know about a golemancer that dresses and acts like a gentleman."
"No Idea, but if they are as excentric as you describe, then finding something on the internet shouldn't be too hard."
I go to leave, but she says one last thing when I'm at the door.
"Golemancers depend on a magic item that they call their 'core,' and they use it to control more golems than they should be able to normally. It can take the form of anything like a watch or can be as elaborate as a tower. I won't get into it too far, but golemancers constantly search for materials or techniques to improve their core."
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"Thank you, Rain."
~
It turns out my hair gets the same resistance treatment as the rest of my body but at a lesser level. Maybe because hair is considered dead except for the follicles.
Keeping my hair at a consistent length while still hoping to grow my resistance will only get more arduous in time, so I might as well get used to a hairstyle that doesn't need much cutting to maintain.
I toy with getting a ponytail, but I dropped that idea and hacked at my hair until it reached my lower back instead of the floor. I had Duchess lazer my beard to keep me clean-shaven, but I didn't let her nuke the follicles.
I still haven't decided what to do with my hair, so I decided to stop caring and focus on something important. I pulled out my phone and glanced at my ring.
It's been a few weeks, and I wonder if it ranked up yet.
"..."
Don't tell me it hasn't been feeding on me this whole time? What the fuck was it doing?
I pull the ring off my finger and see the spotless marks on my flesh. I looked at the inside of the ring, and it looked like the roots were dying.
Don't tell me you could stay dormant in some random underground chamber, but you don't get a drop of blood for a week, and suddenly you're dying.
Maybe when I heal, my body pushes the roots out, and they can't get back in. This parasite sure is dumb.
This thing probably hasn't gotten any blood since I ate that forbidden fruit, and my blood became delicious... Wait, did it do that on purpose? If the ring did, it hasn't gotten a drop of my worryingly delectable blood, and that's funny.
Perhaps I can do this instead.
I went to Rain's workshop and asked for a last-minute change on my prosthetic arm. I wanted one of my fingers to have ports for my ring to access my blood vessels with the weird tendril things. I need to control the blood so I can limit the amount I feed this thing mechanically.
She agreed to the request without asking questions. It didn't take long before I slid the ring down my middle finger, and it locked itself right into place.
It almost shivers in pleasure as it partakes in my blood like a man stranded on a desert island without food for days, and suddenly a cruise ship buffet washes up on the beach.
Maybe it wasn't getting access to the delicious blood that drove it crazy. I definitely got blood on the ring a few times now that I think about it. Ironically, you do feel hungrier rationing food rather than fasting.
"So, are you a living thing or not."
I get no reply from the plant item hybrid as it continues to feed. I artificially limit the blood to match my passive regeneration before contemplating.
I want to just find this golemancer's house and burn it down, but I can't let the intrusive thoughts win. First, I need my payment from Nelson. A thousand credits won't get me far if I need to buy instruments for my plan. I flip my phone open and dial.
*ring ring* * ring ring* *ring ring*
*click*
"Ellis."
"Hey Nelson, did you get my report."
"Yes, I did, but we should talk in person. It's important."
I don't like the sound of this.
"Sure, your office?"
"Don't check in at the front. Use the back door."
*click*
Ominous. I'll get Rob to cram himself into a backpack, so I can sneak him in with me just in case. Unfortunately, Duchess and Khan are way too inconspicuous to sneak anywhere. Now I just need to find a backpack.
~
Master Wang has merchandise for his dojo left rotting in a room. I just took a duffle bag and a hat and ripped off any logos. Most of my clothes are safe in the mansion, so I put some inconspicuous clothing over my gui before heading to the FIB side buildings.
The entire FIB compound is walled off, but on my first day working there, Nelson showed me a shortcut that skips security. Now that I think about it, what the fuck.
I'm going to be optimistic with the government and assume that it's just a fire exit that doesn't lock for safety reasons and not a massive breach in security.
Walking inside, I quickly go to Nelson's office in the small hazard team's building before anyone can stop me. I'm positive some perimeter wards and cameras noticed my arrival, but since security hasn't stopped me, I'm free to do whatever.
I knock and enter Nelson's office. He looks worse than the last time I met him. I sit down and wait for him to speak.
"Ellis, it's good that you came so quickly. I have good news and bad news."
"I'd like the good news first."
"I wasn't giving you a choice, but the good news is that I have your money right here."
He sticks his arm out like he wants to give me a handshake. I'm confused by the gesture, but I grasp his hand, and a smaller system window appears at the bottom of my vision.
[User Nelson Nelson has initiated payment on behalf of a group. Accept 46,021.56 CCs?]
I mentally agree, and I check my balance. Neat, I have spending money now.
"Now for the rest."
"The rest?"
"The 50,000 is for the report, and the rest comes from all the resources that the FIB bought from you. Most of it was mana crystals and berries."
I took Nelson's hand, and the new amount of money stunned me.
[User Nelson Nelson has initiated payment on behalf of a group. Accept 375,000 CCs?]
My total life savings are now a little over 422 thousand credits.
"Damn, can you break down the money for me?"
"50k for hazard pay, a few payment penalities for sloppy paperwork. Don't get mad at me. I'm not the one who dictates how much you get paid. The rest came mostly from the [Snow Berries] because they are heavily infused with cold mana. Better quality than others on the market."
I nod along.
"Now, the bad news?"
"You're suspended without pay until further notice."
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