《Humans Must Adapt!》Chapter 78: Chains
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"Who are your accomplices!?"
"I want my lawyer."
"Where did the bombs come from?! Is there a supplier, or did you make them yourself?"
"I want my lawyer."
"Are you a part of a religious group, or what's up with the baldness?"
"I want my lawyer."
"Sigh, answer me, kid. What's your name, and what's your lawers name."
"... I want to make a phone call."
~
I don't have a lawyer, nor do I know any lawyers. Obviously, the enforcers believe that this is a suicide bombing gone wrong or something. If I could talk to my father, I could get the number of his [Lawspeaker] friend who helped when the banks took a dive and tried to take his business with him.
[Lawspeakers] are lawyers, but lawyers are not [Lawspeakers]. I don't know how exactly, but their designation gives them synergies with judicial systems.
I recall that [Lawspeakers] used to be reserved for followers of the god of order. But after the humans tainted the other races with complicated bureaucracy and paperwork, any lawyer could "become" a [Lawspeaker]. It's basically a prestige class.
I got a chance for a phone call, so I called my foster father.
*ring ring* *ring ring*
*click*
"Son."
"Hey, I've been wrongfully detained. Does your lawyer friend handle criminal defense?"
"Ah, how did you get a phone call?"
"I annoyed the detective until he left the room. This place kinda sucks. They didn't ID me before detaining me. And they haven't searched my person because I still have my cellphone. "
The detective denied my phone call and left me alone, so I just used my phone.
"Ellis, is anyone watching you right now?"
"I wouldn't know, but I'm crouched under the table, pretending to struggle with my shoelaces since I only have one arm."
"YOU HAVE ONLY ONE ARM?!?!"
Ah, shit.
"WHAT IN THE HELL?!"
"Calm down and get me a lawyer. I got to go. By the way, I'm being detained in the enforcer H.Q. near the strip mall... Near where the strip mall was."
"WAS?!"
I hang up and put my phone away. The detective walks in a few minutes later and looks me up and down.
"Please tell me you have been processed."
"..."
"Gods dammit Johnson. How the fuck does he have a pension before I do."
Johnson... I remember Johnson. That's where I recall the voice from. Fucking Johnson.
"Alright, kid. I'll let you in on something. Not cooperating when we book you is only going to hurt you. We will have you processed regardless, so the quicker this happens, the less pain for everyone."
"..."
"Sigh. Have it your way, kid."
A particular ring on his finger flashes as my restraints start tightening. It feels like I'm bound by steel wires that constantly writhe.
"Don't move. I'll be right back."
Nice joke there. Too bad I'm not laughing.
I strain against my invisible restraints, and I get nowhere. The most I can do is wiggle my fingers and toes, but that doesn't help.
The room is soundproof, but I can't get the feeling that almost every enforcer in this building is away. I was kind of dumped before getting some half-ass questions. Either there isn't enough manpower right now, or they want me to marinate in my juices until I crack.
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I twiddle my thumb in anticipation.
~
Somebody who looked like an intern came by and scanned my fingerprints before leaving. It was a strange encounter since I couldn't move, but he was still scared of me. I wanted to spook him further, but I decided not to. If I make him piss himself in fright, I'm the one who will be stuck with the smell since I can't leave the room.
The door opens again, but instead of an enforcer, it's a peculiarly dressed person.
Instead of a human, standing before me is a member of the Theriomorphic family. A therion is an umbrella term for any race that derives most of its characteristics from a single animal. Most of them are humaniod, and most consider the human race a long-lost cousin. Surprisingly we have a lot of similarities besides the jarring differences in anatomy.
This particular therion is a feline. This cat person is a bit on the heavier side but is "nicely" dressed in a way that screams out that he's a sleazy lawyer. Cheap suit with a tie on incorrectly, a briefcase that is improperly closed. I wonder what kind of cat he is. He doesn't have a mane or any stripes. He instead has fur of a mute orange-brown color.
"Is this where one Ellis Vincere is being held?"
"Are you my lawyer?"
He sits down in a chair across from me.
"Yes. Yes, I am. A good one at that!"
"..."
"How rude I am. Hello, my name is Chains."
"Chains?"
"In my culture, it's believed that we will live out seven important phases in our lives, and we will have a new name for each one. My full name is Free Chains because I wanted to escape my previous life and be free. Be free of chains."
"Oh? And what culture is that?"
"Most Felidae therions have something similar, but I am specifically a Silvestris. The Tigris and Leonins have similar beliefs, but the number of 'lives' we live is different."
"Why do your race names sound similar to human words for animals we already have?"
"You tell me, we are speaking the human language after all."
"Fair enough."
"Alright, let's actually get down to business. So are you a terrorist?"
"Nope."
"Alright, that settles that then."
"You're just going to believe me?"
"I don't see why not. Even if you were guilty, I'd get you out of trouble anyway since that's my job. Now I'm going to do a maneuver that will probably get you off scot-free for the time being. Then we can get you free of those 'chains.'
~
All Free Chains the [Lawspeaker] did was get proof of the mistreatment I endured while still not directly being told what I was being arrested for. A tornado of words came out of his mouth, and even I was impressed by his "bull shit."
Since no one saw who blew up the strip mall and the surrounding area, and I was never expressly told what crime I was suspected of committing, the enforcers technically abducted me instead of arresting me.
Tack on the lack of medical treatment while in their care and being placed in bindings meant for dangerous convicted criminals, we could even get grounds for a lawsuit.
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Luckily my passive regeneration didn't remove the proof of my injuries. I still have shrapnel sticking out of my skin from the house explosion and the grenades. Technically, the foreign bodies from the house explosion were under my skin since I healed over them, but that's semantics.
I could walk free right now, but Chains told me the enforcers had one move that could detain me for a few days. Since I am a "victim" or a "witness" of a terrorist attack, they could bring me in for questioning. If I refuse or show any signs of mental instability, I could be forced to take a psych evaluation and be detained for up to 48 hours.
At some point, a law was implemented due to flawed data regarding crime and its causes. They related the number one cause (by a large margin) of crime was mental health related. Now it's being used as a tool against me. Woopie.
The universe is out to get me. Even if I ace this evaluation, I know that by some gods grace, I'll be put into a mental institute. I'm not saying I'm crazy, but that the enforcers are corrupt.
I decided that answering some questions was easier. With my lawyer by my side, I get "interviewed" by the same detective from earlier.
"So. Mr. Vincere, you are now ready to talk."
"Yes, but as a victim of a crime rather than a perpetrator."
The detective seems annoyed. Almost like a criminal is sitting in front of him, and he can't do anything about it. Good.
Free Chains spoke up. "My client consents to having mana or magic instruments that could detect lies present."
We spoke about it earlier, and this seemed the easiest way to get the enforcers off my back. Even if I am "legally" free to go, that doesn't mean I won't be bothered by enforcers trying to get me to "slip up."
The detective nods and places a yellow crystal golfball on the table.
Free Chains whispered to me, "That instrument will glow when it detects any spoken falsehoods, so watch your tongue."
"What were you doing at 8:08 pm?"
"When was that?"
"When the bombs exploded."
"I was trying to get to safety because I had a bad feeling."
The orb doesn't glow.
"Why did you have a bad feeling Mr. Ellis?"
"A man who orchestrated a bombing at my house with me inside attempted to adduct one of my closest friends with a bunch of armed goons. I don't believe in the enforcers, so I went in person. After a confrontation, he pushed a button on a suspicious remote, and knowing that he has a penchant for bombs, I feared the worst."
The orb doesn't glow.
"Can you describe this man?"
"I can sketch him."
I took some paper and started drawing a few pictures of this golemancer before and after I fucked up his jawline. The detective doesn't wait for me to finish and starts asking more questions.
"Who is this friend of yours that got abducted?"
"Flash Gordon, he's my rock."
The orb doesn't glow.
"Do you mean that literally or figuratively?"
"Yes."
The orb doesn't glow.
"Sigh. I find this hard to believe that you had nothing to do with this. You were the only person retrieved from the strip mall, where the explosion was most centered, and you came out of it basically uninjured. There were reports of a hairless naked man beating people up in the streets and dead bodies found in a house that exploded. Explain that."
The orb doesn't glow.
Free Chains pipes up after hearing all this. "I'm sure the great minds of the Bluefield Enforcers can come up with the answers to your question. All of it was answered in your previous inquiries."
"I need to hear it directly from the source."
"Incorrect, as making him repeat answers to questions you already asked, but differently is considered 'manipulating the scenario.' Where you only want one narrative, so you twist questions until you get that narrative from the victim's own throat. That act is condemned in this country."
The orb doesn't glow.
"Sigh, alright. Then answer me how you managed to survive such a blast."
Before I could come up with an answer that would hide my magnificent mansion skill, Free Chains spoke again and answered for me.
"Ellis Vicere is a local prodigy. It took him only a month in his institute to ascend from D to A, and he's top of his class as well. I know you probably are too busy to keep up with local news, which is a bad thing for your line of work, but it was recently published that he's going to represent this city in the capital and then once again, but for the entire human race!
So you want him to disclose his skills and abilities? You know how many confidentiality laws there are in this country. Even owning a 'lie detector' like the one casually in your pocket is a felony without the proper license. So you can keep pushing personal questions, and we'll find grounds to sue."
The orb doesn't glow.
"..."
"..."
"Do you know who his grandfather is?"
"That's enough, Chains."
I didn't know eighty percent of what he said, but apparently, my new school rank came out, and I didn't even know. How did he know...
We stand up and leave. I left the finished drawing on the table. Since I was rushed, it's not 100% photo-realistic.
"I thought you would ask one question, and I would be on my way, but you didn't ask the question." I lean into the orb like it's a microphone. "I did not blow anything up."
The orb doesn't glow.
The detective said one more thing when we left the room.
"I appreciated your time."
The orb glowed.
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