《Playing with the Dead: The Dark Art of Bullshit》Inn - CH 17

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Many explorers brag about their long arduous journeys into the depths of thick inaccessible jungles, into inhospitable mountains, and even the occasional treacherous sea voyage. And while these journeys seem remarkable, their danger pales in comparison to a bundle of buildings too closely packed together. Only in large cities will you find apex predators lurking down numerous alleyways. In cities, safety is an illusion. Nowhere is safe from the Innkeepers who work part time as serial killers, the thieves with knives, and the dastardly librarians with their ideas. Danger lurks in every shadow, waiting to drag the unaware and clueless into the darkness to be devoured. The most admirable explorers delve inward, discovering the dark underbelly of stone and structures where treachery is as common as trees in a forest.

I didn’t take long for Rose to lead us to the Inn.

Azog rubbed his hands together, unable to hide the big grin that covered his face. A not so mighty Inn stood before Azog in all its brilliant glory. Most people would consider the Inn as well kept, but quaint. The slightly off-white walls, and well maintained red roof stood out among the more common drab stone buildings that surrounded it. The door to the Inn was a small and humble door. Personally, I felt that this was inferior to Azog’s Coward’s Brew. It felt forced, out of place, and lacked the character that a real Inn should have. Sure, it was different. But they were trying to be different for the sake of being different, and, well, maybe to attract more customers. Azog disagreed with my assessment.

“This is lovely. So your friend owns this place?”

“She does. I even get a hefty bonus for recommending people to stay here. You two are going to make me rich!” Rose shouted.

“Isn’t that a conflict of interest?” I asked.

“That ‘s just doing business. You’ll love staying here, trust me.”

I didn’t trust her. I barely knew her, and what I knew caused me to question the slim and nearly non-existent trust I had already built up. Frankly, I didn’t even know if she’d slit my throat at night and steal every last coin I had on me.

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“Well, I could use a good night's sleep. It certainly won’t be the worst place I’ve hunkered down for the night,” I relented.

“Far from it.” Azog agreed.

If only he knew, I thought to myself.

“Well, we’ve been standing outside staring at slightly off colored white walls for what feels like an hour, but probably has been closer to ten minutes. Should we go in?”

“Calm down, Arthur. When you’re granted a sight this glorious, you don’t rush through the process. You need to learn to savor the experience.”

“I’ve savored the experience for the last ten minutes. The metaphorical taste has left my mouth and my actual feet are going numb from standing.”

“I agree with Arthur, the sooner we check-in, the sooner I get paid Mr. Bossman.”

“Very well,” Azog relented.

Azog swung open the tiny door and ducked through it, Rose entered next, and I brought up the rear. Inside, perfectly upstanding neatly aligned wooden tables stood. These tables were nothing like the mismatched unwanted furniture that was the hallmark of the Coward’s Brew. Sure, the tables and chairs looked nice, but, again, they lacked the character and endless possibilities that came with every piece of furniture being unique. It was dreadful and soulless, I concluded.

It wasn’t as if this Inn was empty. There were a decent number of patrons who sat at the end of the tables eating what was probably boring unimaginative slop, smiling as if this was the ultimate experience, as if you couldn’t find anything better in this miserable city. I was confident you could, but I held my tongue.

Sitting behind the counter that served as a reception as well as a bar, was a woman who smiled with teeth that were too white to be natural. Not even the darkest of dark magics could produce whiter teeth. Not a single strand of her curly brown hair was amiss; her uniform did not have a single crease. There was attention to detail, and then there was this lady. Maybe I was being a little too harsh, maybe my foul mood carried over from the long walk.

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“I’m Miss Alice. How are you doing, you lovely people? Welcome to Esmeralda’s Rest. You’ll be so well rested that you’ll have the energy to take on even the mightiest of challenges!” said Miss Alice.

“Do you run this place?” Azog asked, as his wide eyes scanned the Inn. This was what separated the amateurs from the professionals. Azog was already thinking about ways to implement what was done here to his Inn back in Mudvale.

“I do. I’m afraid the owner Esmeralda caught a mighty disease and is unable to run her Inn in such a weakened state. As her daughter, I fret daily that the gods will look down on her and cleanse her of the demonic illness that seeks to consume her. Nothing for you darlings to worry about.”

“Demonic illness? Have you consulted the priests?” asked Rose, who looked worried. “Lady Esmeralda was kind the few times we met; she was quite a generous lady.”

“Yes, we’ve consulted the ArchBishop. Do not fret, young tour guide. Esmeralda’s generosity has passed on through me. We take care of those who provide for the Inn.”

“Thank goodness.” Rose exhaled as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Esmeralda’s Inn was the most generous Inn for tour guides in the city by a large margin. Sure, Grog’s groggery paid almost as much, but ‘almost’ just wasn’t the same.

“So how much for two rooms?” I asked, cutting off the meandering meaningless drivel that didn’t lead to getting a place to rest.

Miss Alice smiled as if she was a predator and Alric and I were her clueless prey. Encountering this type of person was not new to me, as they often rode down into the small village of Mudvale to fleece the impoverished village of anything of real value. I clutched my coin purse extra tight, because I knew it wouldn’t be long before I separated with my coins.

“For two lovely travelers, only 3 silver a night.”

It was the perfect amount. Anymore, and Alric and I would’ve looked elsewhere. But we were tired and going elsewhere meant more walking, so I shed a tear as I parted with the coin.”

Miss Alice handed Alric and me our room keys. She looked hesitant for a second, before she spoke up.

“These are dark times. Many shady individuals have been running around our city. Make sure you’re not out too late and your doors are locked. You never know what you'll run into, or more importantly, what will run into you.” Miss Alice warned us.

Miss Alice turned away from the three of us, and turned to wipe down her already spotless bar tap. Maybe it was my imagination but her kind demeanor disappeared for a second. She looked troubled. Neither Rose nor Alric seemed to notice, as they chatted about bubble baths and famous destinations that could only be found within Nosturdam.

I said farewell to my companions, as I watched them head up the large wooden stairs, to the second floor rooms. Once they were gone, I turned and walked out the door. My breath was visible under the cold night air, and the dim magic street lights barely illuminated the city buildings. My mana sight was less taxing at night. For once, I could let down my hood and take in my surroundings.

The glorious colors danced around in the darkness. The sickenly gold hue of gold mana was rampant throughout the city, but it wasn’t the only mana. A rainbow of mana hues moved around, being pulled in different directions. Among the different types of mana, I saw the dark red mana from the testing device the guards had used. It flowed through the streets, meandering to some unknown location. I decided to follow the dark red mana to see where it would lead me. I needed answers that weren’t found while taking a bubble bath.

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