There are many different forms pain can take, and I was never so overeager in my youth as to give them all a taste, stupid risks are not something that I take pleasure in. As such, one would think that my lack of experiencing pain, would lead to a rather low pain tolerance.

These past days have proven that theory wrong.

My ears are ringing, a symptom of shock.

The burns along my arm ache, but it feels at a distance, not much worse than the stinging pains across the rest of me.

The pain doesn’t bother me.

Foreign mana burns its way through me as I draw it in faster than ever before. It cuts deeper than ever before as I crunch it down and convert it into that pleasant warmth, but honestly, I don’t much care about that either.

“Kyra, you’re going to be okay.”

“I’m fine. I’m so fucking fine. I’m great.” I lie, as the burning frustration inside of me peeks out into the world. Oh, I want to scream. I want to rage. I want to burn this whole fucking world to the goddamn ground.

Vii is crying as the warrior carries her roughly, jostling her shattered body. She should be on a stretcher, but these inbred, backwards mutts aren’t familiar with such simple fucking ideas.

“Vii, don’t you fucking die.” I know she can’t hear me, her cries continuing unabated, but I have to say it nevertheless. To myself, to the warrior carrying her, and to the world itself.

“She’ll be alright. We just need to get to the healer.” The warrior says without a mote of worry, “This happens all the time. There was once a guy split in two and our healer put him back together again.”

“Fucking brilliant.” I hiss in reply through grit teeth.

I look down at the mess that remains of my arm, feeling a cold detachment from it.

The skin on the palm of my hand, up to my elbow has completely peeled away, and the pink flesh beneath is not a pretty sight. I wiggle my fingers, the skin cracks and splits, oozing liquids.

“Magic fucking sucks.” I say, swallowing back my rising stomach, “What kind of fire magic burns your own hands?”

“Amateur magic.” Nel says quietly, “You acted brashly.”

“It saved Vii and Eshya a moment sooner,” I reply.

“It did, but proper magic will do that without destroying your body.”

“That sounds nice,” I say poking at the burns, with a sick curiosity, “Learning some healing magic might also be nice.”

“Yes. It would. Where is the healer?” Nel asks as we break out into the training area.

“This way,” The warrior leads while carrying the weeping Vii. He brings us to a corner of the field where the injured are all lined up neatly on the dirty ground. No sterile bedding, no tent to protect from the weather, not even a goddamn cushion.

An assistant quickly approaches to direct us, we’re left to rest in the dirt side by side, next in line among the countless wounded.

“They’re to be treated properly,” The warrior makes clear to the assistant, who looks at us appraisingly for a second before nodding.

“This task is taken care of; we need to return. The others will need our support if they uncover any other beasts.” The warrior says the moment he drops Vii to the ground.

Nel, clutches me tightly, tears building in her eyes.

“We’ll be fine.” I encourage her, lying through my grit teeth, “This healer’s fucking great, right. Go, I’ll take care of Vii. When you come back, it better not be to join us in line.”

“Okay…” She says, giving my shoulder one last squeeze, “Make sure you don’t die. You’ve still got to ask me out, remember?”

“Yeah, and you’ve still got to turn me down.” I laugh, a flash of happiness overcoming my frustrations for a heartbeat.

“Who knows…” She says, following the warrior who’s quick to run ahead.

I shift myself closer to Vii once they’re out of sight. Half the bones in her body are broken, her wings are folded in all the wrong places, her are legs twisted around the wrong way, one crushed and bleeding from the bite wound. Her face is twisted with torturous pain as she weeps.

I suspect she’s lost the energy to scream out loud.

“It’s okay Vii, you’ll be fine.” I say, trying to think of something to say. There’s nothing. And to be honest I’m not sure she even hears me.

Her breathing is incredibly laboured, and I can feel the life oozing out of her every second that passes. I want so much to grasp her hand, or pat her shoulder, or show my support somehow, but there’s nowhere I can touch that it won’t just cause more pain.

The other injured in line aren’t critical. Mostly broken limbs, with a few burn victims like me scattered between. Most are well enough that they’re looking towards me and Vii with concern, and sympathy.

Thankfully, the healer doesn’t take long to arrive. One minute we’re alone and the next he’s standing beside us. Either he teleported or I blacked out.

I wish I knew which was more likely.

“Help her.” I demand, locking onto his eyes, but he doesn’t even spare me a moment.

“A bad case.” He says, “There’ll be tremendous internal bleeding, not to mention the trauma to the organs. I can’t imagine she has an hour… this will cost serious mana.” He says the last with a resigned sigh.

The assistant who guided us to these spots stands by the healer’s side, listening closely to his words and writing a few things in a pad.

The healer places a hand on her belly, and slowly her bones snap back into place in the most horrifying form of healing I’ve ever seen. Her legs and wings untwist and straighten, the bones reforming in the golden glow of mana.

“Be aware, it takes a long time to develop complete Skills that can do something like this.” He explains to the assistant, or perhaps apprentice, “Also be aware of how you a spend the energy of the mana. Wastefulness is an unforgivable sin, especially with so many wounded left to treat.”

I can’t even tell what’s going on in in Vii’s torso, but the healing glow is intensifying there, as he continues to spend more and more mana.

“Using the body’s own energy and hastening it’s healing process is the ideal. Though, it’s also important to improve where possible. Natural healing will often heal wrong, you need to invest enough time, effort, and knowledge into your Skills to avoid exacerbating such problems.”

“I need that magic.” I whisper as Vii sags, the pain finally fading from her expression as she slowly collects herself.

“You can wait,” The healer says, “You aren’t going to die for at least a few hours yet. She’s still recovering, make sure she doesn’t move for, well, so long as your still alive.”

“I was talking about learning your magic not… wait, hours?”

“I’m not your teacher, and I doubt you have the talent for it.” He mutters continuing to lecture is apprentice as he goes to check on some other patients.

“Hours?” I say, “Must’ve heard him wrong. Definitely heard him wrong.”

“Kyra? Where are we?” Vii asks, her eyes fluttering open as she starts to shiver slightly.

“Don’t move.” I order her, “We’re at the training grounds getting healed.”

“I got caught by the beast.”

“Then I burnt it.” I say, proudly raising my crispy fried arm. I know that there are tears rolling down my cheeks, but such physiological reactions can’t be helped.

“Woah, that’s…” She looks at it again, then to my face, then back to my arm.

“That’s bad.”

“Nah, still got a few hours left.” I reply.

“Until what?”

“Until I die, apparently, maybe. Who really knows? Besides, you’re healthy now, so that’s a good thing. Just don’t move too much.”

“I, okay… but how are you not screaming in pain right now?”

“Oh, I can barely feel anything,” I reply, “Half because of shock, half because of an all-consuming rage burning in my soul.”

“You don’t look angry.” She says, looking up at me the same as she would have yesterday. I was worried she might be scarred, and unresponsive, so this simple conversation is pleasant.

“Thank you, I’m trying very hard.”

“Oh, is Eshya…?”

“Fine, unless she got into another fight after we left.” I reply.

“Good,” She nods, “What was I thinking, of course she’s fine.”

We converse lightly from then on, polite topics, simple topics. Occasionally Vii will become unresponsive, paling and shivering before returning to normal again. It terrifies me anew each time.

The tables turn as Vii shouts me awake from a short black out, the healer arriving with his apprentice in tow.

“Oh, you’re here to teach me magic?”

“No,” he says, tiredly reaching down and touching my arm.

I almost reflexively pull back, but nothing happens, my reflexes completely shot.

A flood of mana races in from his touch, unlike most other mana I’ve come across it’s soothing and gentle. It travels across my skin, healing what’s there and inspiring rapid regrowth of what’s missing. My energy is sapped as the missing skin regrows.

“There you’re healthy now,” he says to me, before turning towards Vii, “You, move and jump about for me.”

Vii tilts her head in askance but does as instructed. After half a minute of movement, he nods.

“You’re fine to go as well.”

“What was going to happen if she wasn’t?” I ask.

“All of her bones would split again, and she’d be a puddle of mess on the floor.”

“Huh, that’s not a nice image.”

“No, it’s not.” He confirms, “I’ve only seen it happen a couple of times, but… it is uniquely unpleasant. Especially the sound.

“Anyway, I’ve more work to be done.” He sighs. “More mana to absorb.”

“So, we’re both healthy now.” Vii says cheerily, leading me away from the last few remaining injured. They don’t seem in all that dire of a position.

“We should go and help Eshya and Nel.” I say.

“No need. The beasts are all gone.” Eshya says, approaching us. “Today’s work is over.”

“We hope that they’re all gone.” Nel follows, “We must remain vigilant.”

“Look at where we are, we should always be vigilant,” Eshya replies with a shrug.

“You two didn’t get hurt at all?” I ask.

“My bones are stronger than Vii’s.” Eshya says, lifting her arm and squeezing it, “More mana dense.”

“I will work on my mana.” Vii says quietly, “I will work so damn hard on it.”

“So, we’re done?” I ask, looking between the girls, “What are we supposed to do, then?”

“There is something going on over there,” Nel says turning and gesturing to a large gathering of people. It’s a blend of the locals and the warriors that are a part of Red’s group.

“What’s going on over there?”

“Want to look?” Nel asks.

“I want to sleep, but I’m not sure I can with so much still happening. Do you know what happened to the other students?” I ask.

“No, I haven’t wanted to ask.” Nel replies, shaking her head and looking down.

Vii is going to jump into the air to check, but she freezes up as she flaps her wings, deciding to walk with us instead. Her injuries, even healed, must still be affecting her.

I see the backs of tall soldiers in the centre of whatever is going on, they stand in tight formation with tall shields line up side by side. Together they form a circle with their shields all pointed inwards.

The gathered crowd surround the formation, standing on crates, chairs, and whatever else they can find as they watch whatever’s happening within. Some flyers even watch from overhead.

I hear the roar of a beast from within.

Red’s standing close by, standing on a crate rather than flying. I step up, squeezing beside her to get a look for myself. The others hang back, not feeling quite as eager to get so friendly with our teacher.

It’s only standing atop the crate that I truly see all that’s happening inside the shield circle.

There’s a beast facing off against a student.

The student isn’t doing well.

The boar like creature charges, its horns impaling the small insectoid. Screams fill the air as the student flails about before they’re tossed aside worthlessly.

“Next,” Red says. As I watch, another student is thrown into the circle while the last is still fighting for his last breaths, ignored by audience and beast alike.

The new student, crying and blubbering to an uncaring audience, is the goat girl that we found in the wardrobe.

The shields at the edge of the circle shove her back in as she tries to escape, and pleads for their mercy.

Red’s expression is more schooled and stiff now than I’ve seen it before. Usually she’s more energetic than this, but something about this arena seems to bother her, too.

I suspect her issue is more to do with the failings of the students than the brutality of it all. She’s just a bit fucked up like that.

“Oh, you’re still alive. It’s good to know.” Red says, her gaze not leaving the goat girl as she desperately tries to run away from the beast that charges her down.

My rage is stirred by the sight. I don’t have any particular affection for the girl, but I can easily imagine Nel or Vii down there. Imagining Eshya is less of a problem since she’d probably enjoy it…

“I’ve heard that some students made a good impression on the locals. Was that you?”

“Eshya, Vii, Nel, and I.” I explain, “We fought. Nearly died loads of times. It’s been a bit of a shit day.”

“That it has… I suppose we won’t bother throwing you four in there, then.”

The goat girl’s attempts at survival were meaningless from the start. She trips and escapes the sharp tusks only to be caught by its hooves.

“Given another few days I could’ve made something of her.” She sighs at the sight of the trampled goat girl.

“Why didn’t you?”

“After she ran like that? It would take weeks at best to get her back into fighting shape after that, assuming I could convince anyone here to spare her for that long.

“No, I’d rather spare my efforts on those I can save.”

“Like me?” I ask.

“I hope so, but your mana situation is still rather dire isn’t it?”

“I can do a pretty mean blast of fire magic.” I say, “Though I need to learn how to not burn myself.”

“You what?” She turns away from the next student, one she apparently has no hope for.

“I blasted fire magic. I threw most of my mana into it, so maybe thirty-five? Forty? units.”

“How did you survive the mana shock?”

“I didn’t get any? I mean I was pretty shocked to have my arm burnt to a crisp but that’s about all.”

“Useful.” She says, nodding to herself, “I’ll get you throwing fireballs tomorrow. Get used to building your mana back up.”

The truth is I’m full up already. The pain of absorbing and crunching mana feels so inconsequential now, the greater frustration is how slowly I’m able to draw it once I hit this point.

“Say, Red. Do you actually care about us?” I ask, watching as a minotaur takes to the field. He’s the one who saved us during the battle, and he’s putting up a tremendous fight, but he’s still losing.

She doesn’t immediately reply, gazing out into the field as the minotaur loses his weapon and tries to tackle the beast.

“I wouldn’t be doing all this if I didn’t care.” She says, as the minotaur catches the bull and tries to throw it over. His muscles are heaving but he’s not going to win.

“From your standards what I’m doing is certainly quite a bit shit.” She continues.

In the battlefield below, a warrior from the townsfolk cries out and enters the ring. He levels a sword and hamstrings the beast. The minotaur handily throws the beast with the opportunity given, violently beating it until it stops moving.

“This is the only way I know to save any of you.” She finally says, joining the cheering for the victorious minotaur.

My rage snaps.

I relax, only now realizing how tense I was. My shoulders feel loose as I gently roll them while stretching my neck.

The slaughter starts again.

A new student. A new beast.

A new corpse at the end of it.

It’s ugly, it’s awful, it’s unacceptable.

Everyone looking have resigned themselves to this fate. They don’t look on with complete apathy, rather, to them this is normal. This is the world they too live in, and one day they’ll be that corpse.

This is nature. Survival of the fittest.

I get it.

Just as I get what needs to be done.

Humanity has already put nature to the sword for better and for worse. Looking back now, at the mother nature I knew back on Earth, I see how she was crippled by humanity. Denied the freedom to express her ineffable cruelty.

The goat girl is still alive, dying slowly and painfully as others tread on her soon to be corpse. They too soon join her in the dirt, beast and student alike.

So how can I stop this?

I’ll do as my ancestors have done before me.

I’ll fuck mother nature until she submits, and I’ll make her my bitch.

To do that, I’ll need people. I’ll need an empire.

“Red,” I say, “You’re real fucked up.”

She shakes her head and sighs.

“Kyra, I get it. You were raised protected, you didn’t see this side of reality. You need to adapt to the world around you. Or you’ll die, like them.”

“No. It’s the world that will need to adapt to me,” I say. My feet feel steady on the ground, my heartbeat slows, and I feel an overwhelming calm. The cold rage is still storming inside, but it’s no longer distracting.

Red looks at me, her eyebrows raised.

She doesn’t get it. She’s lived a difficult life, and she’s trying to do her best with it, but it isn’t enough.

“Captain Lefue,” I say, “When the time comes, I’d like for you to stand with me. As fucked up as you are, so long as you still care I’m sure you can be saved.”

“…you are offering to save me?” She says with an awkward, hesitant laugh. She steps back, her eyes are wide, and I know she’s listening.

“I’ll change this whole fucking universe, or as much of it as I can reach.” I declare, “I’ll need to prepare first. Train me as well as you can.”

With that I leave her to her slaughter. Her fucked up attempt to save people.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Classes & Skills

~Mana Form: Grade 1

Current goal: Develop your mana form.

Current mana density: 61 units

~Fire Magic: Grade 1

Current goal: Develop a Skill for fire manipulation.

-Skill: Flame burst

~Defensive Techniques: Grade 1

Current goal: Develop a Skill for reactive mana skin.

-Skills: Mana skin

~Combat Techniques: Grade 1

Current goal: Develop a Skill for mana infusion.

-Skills: Mana shield.