“You don’t need to do this,” I said, brushing some lint off of Cas’ shoulder. “And you definitely don’t need to be the first person to do it.”

Cas’ knuckles clicked faintly as he clenched his fists.

“I know but I do. If I don’t just do it now and get it out of the way… I never will,” he said, nervously adjusting the collar of his Space Corps uniform. “Where did they even manage to get one of these anyway? Do you think they have more or will you all need to wear this one? If so, I’m sorry, I am getting nervous and sweaty.”

I laughed at his weak joke as he wiped his sweaty palms on his leg.

“I don’t know. I assume they had some stashed somewhere. Or maybe they just made new ones for us? There are enough pictures of graduates in full dress, it makes sense that they’d be able to throw one together,” I said.

“Eh, I guess,” Cas shrugged. “But it feels just like the ones on the base. If I were making them from scratch I would have made them comfier.”

“Oh yeah?” I smiled, watching as Cas moved his arms about, testing the seams of the uniform.

“Oh yeah, a little bit more give here and there but mostly I’d make them out of the same stuff as the silvers. Gods, I miss them. They were so comfy…” He trailed off wistfully.

I sighed.

“They really were. They felt just like pyjamas but we didn’t get in trouble for wearing them to breakfast,” I added.

A mischievous smile came over Cas’ face and he laughed.

“Do you remember when—” he started before the door opened before us and Peggy emerged.

“It’s almost time, they’re just finishing setting up the interview space. They managed to get so much good stuff. It’s going to be such a blow to morale. God, I hope Harvey loses his mind when he sees this,” she said, an uncharacteristic snarl appearing on her lips.

The smile died on my face as worry flared within me but Cas was too distracted to notice.

“What stuff did they manage to find?” he asked anxiously.

“So much. Medical records, notes from teachers, everything They’re just sifting through it all now and trying to work out what we can use and what’s useless,” she said with an excited grin.

Cas swallowed, his throat bobbing nervously, before he nodded.

“You okay with that?” I asked softly.

The manic energy in Peggy’s eyes died down slightly and I saw her take in Cas’ expression.

“This is still completely up to you, you know?” she said gently. “If you don’t want to share any of this or if you don’t want other people looking at it, you can just say.”

His tongue darted out to wet his lips and his eyes flicked between me, Peggy and the door to the small room we were in just off the war rooms.

“Yeah, I guess it just feels a little weird to be sharing this kind of thing? I had to keep it a secret for so long and they always said that if I told anyone what was happening, it would ruin his chances of getting on the Council and they’d make sure I regretted it, you know?” he said, not quite looking at us. “It’s hard to push that aside, even now.”

“Yeah. I get that,” Peggy said, looking back towards the door. “They asked me if I’ll do it too.”

“And?” Cas asked.

Peggy shook her head, some uncertainty crossing her face.

“I don’t know. Part of me wants to. I could tell the full story about what happened, starting at the beginning. Tell them about how the Council failed my parents and didn’t protect me as a kid, right up until how I got here and what happened with Gem but… I don’t know if I can do it.”

My lips rose in a supportive half-smile.

“That’s fair. You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” I said.

“I know,” she replied with a dejected sigh. “But that makes it worse. If they just said ‘you’re doing it and you have no choice’, it would still be hard but I’d be able to do it but because they aren’t… I just feel guilty.”

“You shouldn’t!” I started.

“Yeah, I know. And I know that Andy would never force me to and he would even feel so guilty about me feeling bad but I still can’t help it. I know how much this would cripple morale and it was even my idea but I just don’t know if I can do it…” She shrugged before shaking her head slightly. “Anyway, we’re ready for you to come in if you want to start having a look at some of the stuff we’ve found so you can prepare. Did you write a script or anything, by the way?”

Cas glanced back at the screen on the table.

I knew he had. I’d woken up a few times in the night and seen him typing away, a determined look on his face. I don’t think he’d even slept at all. He was just staring at the wall when I woke up in the morning.

“Kind of. Well, I started to write what I wanted to say and it all just poured out. I don’t think I can say half the stuff I wrote though,” he said with a dark chuckle.

“How come?” I asked.

He looked down, a smirk appearing on his face.

“Didn’t Andy say he didn’t want it to be a personal attack? Just laying out the facts and explaining what happened and why I came to Freo, right?” he clarified.

“Yeah…” Peggy said slowly.

“So… I really shouldn’t say things like ‘fuck you, Harvey, you piece of shit. I hope you die’?” he asked.

I snorted.

“Yeah, that feels more like a personal attack. You’re meant to just be addressing the people of Nova and everyone else out there in the galaxies, not him,” I reminded him gently.

He sighed and looked down, the grin slipping from his face.

“Yeah, I know. I just know that he’ll watch it compulsively and I want him to hear me say it,” Cas said quietly.

Peggy fiddled with the screen in her hands.

“Then, that’s why you need to do this. Because, if it goes well, thousands of people will be saying it for you. Maybe more,” she said with a shrug.

He nodded and pulled his shoulders back.

“They will and then, one day, I’ll get to say it to him,” he muttered, almost to himself.

“But, for now, you can just tell everyone all the stuff he put you through,” Peggy said.

Cas nodded and glanced towards the door again.

“How many other people did they ask to share their stories, do you know?” he asked, his voice uncertain.

“Quite a few that I know of. I know they spoke to a few of the people who have been here longer, Tuc’s dad was asked too but he kind of already shared most of Tuc’s story and he didn’t want to tell any more of his own. Ummm… who else? I think Andy said something about Orion and Leo. Not Orion from out there,” she pointed back at the door, “our old tutor. But he did say that he wanted to speak to the other Orion too which makes sense because his story is dark. Oh, Elliot and Andy are going to do it too and apparently, Chal might do it! Did he already speak to you?”

Peggy turned her wide eyes on me.

I felt my shoulders tense in anticipation.

“He didn’t but I know it’s coming. I left the room before he could ask me,” I admitted. “I can go first though, if you want? We could trade our uniforms and go from there? Mine might be a little short on you though.”

Cas smiled at me distractedly.

“I’m good. I should be able to do this,” he said. “Damn, I hope that Chal does it though. I’d love to know his story.”

“From what he’s told me, it’s pretty rough,” Peggy said before her screen lit up and distracted her. “Andy wants to know if you’re having second thoughts. He says it’s alright if you are and that he’ll film his today instead if you want. Oh, he didn’t want me to tell you he was checking in.”

I laughed and Cas joined in, lacing his fingers through mine.

“I’m ready, let’s just go in and do this,” he said decisively and I knew that if we didn’t go in now, he’d change his mind.

I tightened my grip on his hand.

“Okay, Peg, lead us in.”