I didn’t sleep well. I’d spent the whole night with my eyes shut, just in case they came to check on us which they did several times. I tried to stay in the same position as well but I was too restless. Soon, this would be over. Either we’d be free or we’d be trapped. Probably for life.

I needed to know. The uncertainty was driving me insane. The lights flashed on and I squeezed my eyes shut against it.

Don’t get up yet, pretend you’re still asleep until they come in and wake you. Peggy ordered, immediately fully awake.

She probably hadn’t slept either, I doubt any of us did.

“Trial time! Get up!” I heard the Guardian shout through the door.

I refused, lying as still as possible, as if I was still asleep. I heard mutters on the other side of the door before it was thrown open. The Guardian’s footsteps came closer until they were standing over me.

“Get up!” They called again.

I didn’t move. My heart hammered in my throat as I anticipated being hit but instead, a hand gently shook my shoulder, trying not to jostle my injured body. I opened my eyes slightly, peering up at the familiar grey mask.

“Time to get up.” They said softly.

“Wha’s going on?” I tried to slur like sleep was refusing to release me.

I couldn’t have been very convincing though because the Guardian chuckled almost silently.

I sat up, pretending to need their help to pull me into standing. I did actually. The painkillers were starting to wear off and moving was hard again.

“You have five minutes to brush your teeth and hair and get presentable then, we’ll come back for you.”

I fell back against the wall as they let go of my shoulder and nodded, forcing a yawn. I stayed there until they shut the door behind them.

You all up?

Yeah. I didn’t sleep. Cas answered immediately.

Me either. They’re just waking me up now. Peggy added.

How are y’all feeling about the trial?

Nervous. Peggy answered.

Yeah… but at least we’ll get to see each other! I’ve missed you all so much! Gem thought excitedly.

I smiled and grabbed my toothbrush, rushing to get ready before the Guardians came back to get us. I didn’t have a mirror so I dragged my fingers through my hair, ignoring the stabbing pain in my shoulders, hands and head, trying to bring it back under control. It felt frizzy, as it always did when I couldn’t look after it properly but there was nothing I could do about that.

Footsteps travelled back along the corridor, past my door and stopped outside Cas’. I paused, listening carefully to the distant whisper of voices and the gentle snick of handcuffs. I stepped towards the door, excitement raging in my stomach. I’d finally be able to see my crew again. It was different to talking to them, this way I could actually make sure that they were okay. The door opened and it took everything in my power not to rush out of it and hug Cas. Even so, I was still standing too close to the door when it swung open. The Guardian stepped back before recovering and holding out the handcuffs for me.

“Please. Can I just hug him first?” I asked, trying to look past them to Cas.

The Guardian looked back at their colleague before looking back to me and nodding once.

I dashed out of the door, barely seeing Cas before throwing my arms around him, trying so hard not to squeeze him too hard and hurt him. Tears gathered in my eyes as I held him. He felt so alive and warm. It was the first time I’d voluntarily touched someone in months. It gave me the same feeling I got when we entered the Nova atmosphere and saw the base again. It felt like coming home.

I stepped back too soon and stared up at him. Even with the dark circles under his eyes and the slight swelling to his cheek, he was the most handsome person I’d ever seen.

His goofy smile echoed mine and I reached out my hands to hold his.

I missed you. I thought, trying not to let the tears fall from my eyes.

He winced as he gripped my fingers weakly.

I missed you. His eyes scanned my face, seemingly reassuring himself that I was still alive.

I looked down at his bruised and swollen fingers. Some were tied together with scraps of his old scrub top in a makeshift splint. I loosened my hold but Cas gripped me tighter, not willing to let go just yet.

“We need to cuff you.” One of the Guardians said, hesitantly holding the cuffs out to me.

I turned, not wanting to look away from Cas and held out my wrists. They clipped them on so loosely I could probably have slipped my hands out if I tried but I resisted the urge, instead allowing them to attach a chain that connected Cas and me to the Guardians.

We followed them to Peggy’s door where she was standing ready as soon as they unlocked it. She grinned at us, dark shadows also decorating the skin under her eyes, and allowed the Guardian to clip her in behind Cas. We walked eagerly but slowly forwards towards Cory’s door and waited impatiently to see him again. He wasn’t standing at the door like the rest of us had been, he was waiting further back inside his room so, despite craning our heads, we couldn’t see him. The Guardian who wasn’t holding our chain walked into the room, holding the handcuffs out for him. He followed the Guardian back out, holding his hands together carefully, one of which was heavily bandaged. The clean white material stood out against his dark blue top. He stopped in front of us, his eyes taking us in, roaming over our exposed skin and checking for visible injuries. He grimaced slightly before smiling at us gently.

What happened to your hand? I asked.

It’s alright. He answered, walking to the back of the queue and refusing to look at us.

What’s wrong with his hand? Gem immediately asked.

Nothing. He answered again, weakly, knowing it was pointless to lie but still doing it anyway.

Gem’s door swung open and she was waiting. She pushed past the Guardian her arms wrapping around me immediately. I grinned, ignoring the pain in my ribs, feeling her reach out and pull Cas into the hug too, his body pressing against my back. She let go after squeezing tightly once more and continued down the line, pausing to grasp Peggy’s shoulder before stopping in front of Cory.

She threw her arms around him, holding him tightly as he rested his head on her shoulder. I heard her whisper something to him but stopped listening. I didn’t need to hear what they were saying, they deserved as much privacy as they could have. After a little while, she stepped back slightly and he looked down, ashamed.

“Cory, show me.” I heard her say quietly and turned as much as I could to look too.

His shoulders drooped and he unwrapped his right hand to show us the injury. Blood rushed from my face as I stared at the space where his fingers should be. Two were missing. His ring finger and his little finger were gone.

“Oh, Cory.” Gem whispered, taking his hand tenderly.

“It’s fine.” He muttered, blood colouring his face.

Gem turned, her back stiffening, fierceness burning in her eyes.

“Was this you?” She demanded of the Guardians, the hand that wasn’t holding Cory’s clenched into a fist.

One stepped back from her fury.

“No! Gem, it wasn’t them! It happened before!”

Gem turned back to Cory, confusion written on her face. Finally, I remembered. The cut on his hand. It had looked bad when we first came to the jail but I’d completely forgotten about it. My heart sunk. I was the Captain. I should have remembered and insisted that he got treatment.

“It… it happened when I was… working on you…” He trailed off.

“Oh.”

“I should have gotten it looked at sooner but…” He shrugged, not wanting to tell her how deeply depressed he had become.

She stared down at his hand clasped in hers.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, touching his forehead against hers and bringing his cuffed hands up to stroke her face.

“Why are you sorry? This was my fault.” She whispered, tears gathering in her eyes.

“No, it wasn’t. I would have done anything to save you.”

He kissed her forehead softly.

She refused to look up as tears dripped down her face.

“It was my fault really. I should have let them do something about it earlier.”

She peeked up at him and his lips rose into a smile.

I love you.

I love you.

“Sorry to interrupt but… We need to bring you to the Council room…” The Guardian said uncomfortably.

Gem kissed Cory gently on the lips before turning back to the Guardian.

“Alright. I’m ready.” She rolled her shoulders back and held out her wrists to be cuffed, slipping into place behind Cory.

No retreat. I thought, squaring my shoulders and staring at the lift doors.

No surrender.