Turns out, this didn't take long at all to write. Enjoy.

Spoiler: dice

Akane, MechApt (open lock):

13d100: 747

Lock, fulfill its only purpose in existence by staying closed:

?d100: 141

The lock snicked open in seconds; Akane tucked her tools away with a quietly proud smile and carefully slid the second-floor window open so she could eel inside. The rest of the team, clinging to the wall alongside her, followed her in.

Spoiler: dice

Mari, Stealth:

?d100: 961

Keiko, Stealth:

10d100: 528

Akane, Stealth:

11d100: 646

Hazou, Stealth:

9d100: 85 DUDE???!!!

Sleeping Civilian, Awareness:

?d100: 87

Hazou was last through the window; the others had dispersed through the room, each to their own assigned task. Hazou waited a moment for his vision to adjust, then cat-footed to the bedroom door and eased it open a crack before peering inside. Honami had assured them that this suite had the same layout as the room next door that was occupied by Joutarou and his friends.

The room's occupants—a rich merchant and her husband—were sound asleep, so Hazou slipped inside...

...only to trip over a small valise that had been carelessly dropped near the door and faceplant on the hard wooden floor.

The merchant and her husband sat bolt upright in bed. The woman took one look around, saw Hazou, and screamed.

"HEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPP!!! JOUTAROOUU!!!!"

Things started to happen very fast.

The merchant and her husband rolled off the bed away from Hazou.

Mari, Keiko, and Akane came through the door at a dead run, weapons in hand.

The wall exploded as two hundred and fifty pounds of angry jonin came through it like a chakra bull in full charge.

Spoiler: dice

Keiko, Weapons:

18d100: 883

Akane, Taijutsu:

15d100: 647

Hazou, Taijutsu:

15d100: 817

Mari, Genjutsu:

?d100 - ?d100 (circumstance: poor lighting): 1254

Joutarou, Kenjutsu:

?d100: 1679 Total domination!

"Snakebite Black!" Mari called, delicate fingers dancing through genjutsu handseals with trained speed. Hazou and Akane circled left and right, coming in from their opponent's sides while Keiko sent a storm of metal from straight ahead.

The Iron Nerve took Hazou's body through the pattern of Inoue-sensei's orders without need for his attention, leaving him space to evaluate the situation. The room was just about the worst possible environment for a ninja fight: tight quarters, only one valid kawarimi target (the dresser), and poor lighting. The dim light would make genjutsu more difficult so, from one perspective, Snakebite was an odd choice. If Inoue-sensei managed to snag Joutarou with the genjutsu the fight would be over instantly. If not, she was effectively taking herself out of the fight for a few critical seconds.

From another perspective, it was the best of a series of bad options. In their planning sessions, she had made clear that his build, movements, and the sword on his back strongly suggested that Joutarou was a kenjutsu specialist. Fighting him at close range was a sucker's bet, she had said.

She was right.

Joutarou's sword swept from its sheath, slapping Keiko's kunai aside with contemptuous ease. It shifted casually to the right in order to slice Akane's throat open, then flicked to the left to cut Hazou's arm off at the shoulder. He balestraed forward and into a lunge that sent his point through Mari's face and out the back of her head. She fell back, the weight of her dead body tearing the sword from his hand and tugging him momentarily off balance.

The world froze around Hazou. He was in mid-collapse, halfway to his knees with white-hot agony screaming from his arm and shattering his thoughts into a million pieces. The geyser of blood coming almost straight from his heart seemed to take all his air with it, leaving him unable to do anything for a precious moment. He knew exactly what was going to happen. His lungs weren't working, but inside his head he was screaming for Keiko to run, get out, kawarimi away and vanish into the team's numerous escape routes outside. If she could make it to the edge of the compound and into one of Kagome's pre-prepared slips, she would be safe. Even a jonin wasn't going to follow her through what was waiting out there without getting mangled. All she had to do was run. And he knew, knew, that she wouldn't. Not when the dead body of her teacher, her mentor, her idol, her forbidden love, was literally hitting the floor at her feet.

Spoiler: dice

Keiko, Weapons:

18d100 + ?d100 (Mori Clan Final Technique: Unfettered Brilliance): 2108

Joutarou, Taijutsu:

?d100: 616

Keiko screamed and the universe screamed with her. Chakra lightning exploded from the walls, rippling across her skin and connecting her to everything and everyone. She danced up those strands of lightning like the goddess of death, sliding effortlessly around Joutarou's desperate handstrikes and carving him up as she went.

The first kunai stabbed between the radius and ulna of her victim's left arm, providing a lever that shifted his balance a little more, causing his next strike to come up short. The second kunai went into his bicep at an angle, giving her an anchor to pull him forward as she dropped her entire weight straight down, massive chakra adhesion letting her move faster and pull harder than a girl her size should have been able to.

He tumbled forward, limbs flailing, his cry of surprise cut off as the point of a pink shuriken went in through his mouth and out through the top of his head, ripping most of his skull off in the process. Almost before the stroke was complete she was thrown backwards by the first of a series of massive seizures, feet and hands and head beating a staccato tattoo on the floor.

The world went dark around Hazou as bloodloss carried him off into unconsciousness and death. His final thought: Why was the shuriken pink?!

You have died. There are no saved games. Start over: Y/N?

Time to create a new protagonist; character creation rules are the same as before. You have an extra week to vote, as the GMs will need the time to figure out where we go from here.

Voting ends on Wednesday, August 17, 2016, at 12pm London time. Also, this entire update never happened; I was just feeling bored at the idea of writing another scouting update. The actual update will be out later—maybe today, probably tomorrow.