“Drill and ceremony is a terrible, boring thing. At the same time, it is at the core of the military heart. The practice has existed since the very first professional armies and links us with a shared tradition. So, when you’re burning underneath the afternoon sun, after hours of turning in synchronized movement, just remember one thing. It has sucked for long before you were born and will suck long into the future.

Embrace the suck.

--Change of Command Rehearsal for the 2nd Division, Lenorian Army. AC 1499.

As the charge clears the forest, Sergeant Lee’s domain gradually fades away and the water returns to encompass us all. The titan crabs shrink once more, back to sizes roughly commensurate with our own. Up ahead, I can see three pufferfish dressed in white, with a large floating figure amongst them. It takes me a second, but I recognize Nurse Joy.

I’m starting to get a little uncomfortable being carried around like an invalid, but the others aren’t complaining and to be honest, I feel a little intimidated by what I’ve seen from the heavy crabalry so far. A minute later we reach the medics and Nurse Joy springs into action.

Her previous bubbly grace is no longer present and I see she’s replaced it with a cool, professional pragmatism. She begins to quickly ramble off to the pufferfish beside her.

“Triage now.”

Her eyes shift with her detecting skills, and she immediately focuses on Bill and me. The other crabs have circled up, pulling security and scanning the exterior for any signs of danger. The two of us are left floating with the medics as the others are released from the domain which held them in place. As I look at the three pufferfish, I note the rank on their chests. They’re privates, just as I am.

Nurse Joy talks low, giving directions as needed and I realize they must be in training as well. I feel a bit rankled at the notion that my injury is just part of a training exercise for somewhere else, but at the same time, I feel reassured. Although the impaling root hurts, it’s probably not that serious. As they finish up, one of the training medics looks to Nurse Joy and says with a hesitant tone,

“Ready for transport?”

The manatee leans forward and suddenly her bulk takes on a hint of menace.

“Are you asking me or telling me?”

At the question, the pufferfish bucks up and replies confidently,

“The patients are ready to transport!”

Nurse Joy nods and repeats the phrase to the crabs guarding the perimeter. Afterward, I hear her whisper to the pufferfish,

“Remember, regardless of rank, if you’re the medical professional on ground and there isn’t a security concern, what you say goes.” She pauses, and then asks a follow up question. “But if there is danger, what is the first concern?”

The two other pufferfishes have joined the first and one of them speaks up,

“Suppress the enemy, then offer treatment.”

Nurse Joy beams at him. She says, “Of course, with a medical evacuation, security should already be established but there are always exceptions.”

Sergeant Lee talks over the conversing medics,

“Teleportation in five seconds.”

A blinding flash of light later, and I’m back in the infirmary. As I’m moved to a stretcher, Nurse Joy hovers over me. I feel a pulse of mana from her, and mana circuitry lights up. I don’t even get a chance to speak before Nurse Joy says,

“Sleep now.”

And the construct sends me under.

I wake up, groggy and disoriented and see a masked face leaning over me. I try to move and panic as I realize I’m paralyzed. I can’t budge a muscle, and I have no feeling in my body. The masked face speaks to me and I recognize Doctor Benselsik. He whispers,

“Your internal organs are inefficient. I can replace them with a siren’s, our miniaturization tech has progressed rapidly the last few decades and I’m pretty sure I can fit it all in there.”

Nope, no, I like my organs unmodified thank you very much! I try to express my disapproval but realize with that I still can’t move a centimeter.

Doctor Benselsik furtively looks over his shoulder before turning back to me. He continues whispering,

“I’m about to disengage a portion of the paralysis module. Just rotate your eye stalks if you agree to the procedure.”

A moment later I can feel I’ve regained the ability to move my eyes. With all the will I have in my disposal I remain motionless. No siren parts for me, thank you very much!

Even though he is wearing a mask, I can see the frown on his face. He turns to the bed I’m on and starts inspecting a panel off to the side while muttering,

“Is there a problem with the module? The maintenance techs checked it last month. Why isn’t he moving?”

He seems to have completely ignored me for the moment as he tries to puzzle out the perfectly functioning magi-tech. It was then my savior arrived. Nurse Joy bustles into the room from around the corner saying,

“And how is the patient Doctor…. DOCTOR BENSELSIK!!! Put him back to sleep right this instant!”

She rushes over to me and whispers once more,

“Don’t worry. The regeneration suites are active. I’ll make sure he doesn’t do anything untoward…”

A wave of relief passes through me as I fall asleep once more.

I wake up thrashing, shaking off nightmares of squid arms and fins instead of legs. I quickly do an inventory and sigh with relief. It seems Nurse Joy did as she said. I’m going to try to stay away from here as much as possible in the future. A nod in the wrong place at the wrong time could be catastrophic. My appendages seem to be fine, but it’s hard to tell about the internal organs. As I think about it, I realize that any drastic change like that would probably be reflected in my status. I haven’t checked it in a while and as I move to do so, a blinking notification catches my attention. I flick a mental claw to bring it up and I’m flooded with a wall of text,

Congratulations!

You have survived multiple extreme training scenarios with life-or-death stakes!

You have survived combat with creatures far surpassing your level!

You have successfully led subordinates during those same encounters!

All your subordinates have survived!

You have gained experience!

You have leveled up X6!

You are now level 31!

You gain +12 to all Stats from the Level up!

The rush of stats infuses my body and I pull up my status.

Character Screen

Name:

Sir Crabby McCrabbington I

Age:

10 Months

Level:

31

Class:

Coastal Squire

Race:

Elemental Crab

Titles:

Triumvirate Unveiled, Scion of the Crab Gods, Lore Contributor II, Bridge Between, Skill Smith

Health:

640/640

H-Regen:

0.64/sec

Mana:

840/840

M-Regen:

0.85/sec

Stamina:

1360/1360

S-Regen:

1.3/sec

Basic Stats

Strength:

66

Wisdom:

85

Vitality:

64

Intelligence:

84

Dexterity:

72

Charisma:

81

More...

Another notification catches my attention, the *more* button blinking slowly on the screen.

Congratulations!

[Mana Manipulation] III has increased in level!

It is now level 5!

[Earth Manipulation] III has increased in level!

It is now level 7!

[Water Manipulation] III has increased in level!

It is now level 6!

[Riding Mask] III has increased in level!

It is now level 3!

Step by step, incremental progress Crabby. I heave a deep sigh, bone tired. I’m making progress but it feels so slow sometimes. I push the negative thoughts away and focus on the present. I lift myself off the stretcher and down onto the floor. As I do, the door to my room opens and Drill Sergeant Lee walks in. He’s looking down at a tablet in his hand and as he gets closer, he pulls his eyes away from it. He says to me,

“Private Crabby. We’ve already received statements from your teammates regarding the incidents which occurred. As team leader, review them to ensure they are accurate.”

He hands the tablet to me, and I take a few minutes to read their accounts. I’m bemused by the recordings, as I don’t even need to read who it’s from to recognize the person who wrote it. The Bill brothers are overly technical. Wilhelm is terse and short-winded, Mina effuse and bubbly. And finally, Luna, a strand of optimism threading through her narrative that brings a smile to my mandibles.

Everything appeared to be accurate, so with a nod I hand it back to the Drill Sergeant. He asks me,

“Do you have anything to add?”

I think about it a moment and almost say no. They had pretty much covered everything, but there was something which I don’t think they had noticed in the heat of the battle. I say,

“Err… I could be wrong Drill Sergeant, but… I feel like the forest was overly targeting me. Almost to the point where it ignored other, easier targets to try to get a hit in.”

Sergeant Lee nods and replies,

“Yeah, the forest is dumb, but it ain’t stupid. The senses it has aren’t fully understood, but every time a team goes in there, the kelp invariably attacks the person in charge.”

I hazard a question,

“Why was the forest there?”

He glares at me for a second before loosening up. He continues,

“The Kelp forest is actually a semi-controlled training area for higher levels. Unfortunately, in this case it appears to have left the range of land reserved for that purpose. The reason is unknown but currently being investigated. Anything else PRIVATE Crabby?”

I can tell I’m beginning to aggravate him, but I go in for one last shot. I feel it’s important to say,

“Yes, Drill Sergeant. When I was temporarily incapacitated, Private Luna immediately took charge and made an effective plan. If it wasn’t for her efforts, we might not have made it out alive. I know we’re new soldiers, and in training, but I’d like to recommend her for a commendation of some sorts.”

We stare at each other, the lobster and I, the silence stretching overlong. Then Drill Sergeant Lee *grunts* and says in a low voice,

“That has already been taken into account. Good job in trying to take care of your soldiers. You take care o’ them and they’ll take care of you. Now come on, everyone’s waiting on us. We have things to get done.”

I follow the Drill Sergeant into the hall, and we take the winding turns back to the sleeping bay. It’s empty and we continue forward. We leave and go to the hallway heading to the running and exercise area. As we exit, I see my teammates at the position of attention, lined up and facing center field. I almost jump out of my shell with excitement when I see Todd standing off to the side.

What’s going on?

There’s an old octopus standing in front of the squad and I quickly fall into formation. As I run to take my place I’m able to make out his rank. The Octopus is a Captain. What I now know to be the commander yells,

“Publish the Orders!”

And Drill Sergeant Lee begins reading,

“For exceptionally meritorious service under fire and for exceptional leadership under duress, Incursion City Army is proud to promote Private Crabby to the rank of Specialist. Signed, Frederick Burley, Captain, Commanding.”

The octopus barks out,

“Give a round of applause.”

I look to my team and they’re smiling at me while enthusiastically clapping. A strange swell of pride rises in my shell as I awkwardly wave and manage a quiet,

“Thanks everyone.”