Chapter 48 | IRRATIONAL JEALOUSY AND PANCAKES

It's not back to feeling cold like I thought it would be.

Sure, for the most part, we've both been locked in silence for the past two days, but we haven't gotten distant from each other like I thought we would have.

I thought losing Moose would cause Vaughn to withdraw himself from all socialization with me, but instead, he's remained the same.

Sure, there's no more happy chit chat, and there is less talking, but he did tell me a couple of stories about Moose when I asked him to.

My favorite was hearing about how Moose was terrified of the water and absolutely hated it, which is ironic considering how much Newfies usually love water. But once, when Vaughn decided to try and bring him swimming, Moose thought he was drowning, and started panicking.

So, he charged in and swam up to him, grabbing his forearm with his mouth and trying to pull him to shore.

That was the first and last time he went in the water--when he thought Vaughn was in danger.

I cried when I heard that one, much like when I visited his grave the following day, saying goodbye.

Packing up my bag with the things I'll need for my week in the village, I feel guilty for leaving so soon after Moose died.

I feel as if I should stay and offer moral support, but then again, Vaughn probably wants me gone.

I watch out the window as the sun starts to rise, and glancing at my phone's time confirms that it's a little after 9 am.

Hearing movement to my right, I glance over to see Vaughn sit up, rubbing his eyes slightly.

"Morning."

"Morning," I reply.

He stands up, ruffling his hair a bit with his right hand. "Did you eat?"

"No."

If I did, he probably would have woken up due to the scent of it.

"Are you hungry?"

"No," I pause. "Are you?"

"I can wait," is all he says as he starts to grab his things. "You should eat something, though."

"You don't have to come with me, you know," I say softly, ignoring him. I don't want to eat right now. "If you don't want to, that's fine."

He turns, looking at me oddly. "Mikaere, I'm not letting you walk for three hours in the woods alone."

I merely decide to nod, opting not to insist that he stay.

If he didn't want to, he wouldn't.

"Okay, thank you."

Twenty minutes later and we're walking through the woods, both quietly considering and mulling over our own thoughts.

I've been trying to keep Moose out of my mind, knowing that I'll start to get too sad if I think about him for too long.

So, I've tried to distract myself by considering what will happen during this trip to the village. Maybe nothing exciting will occur, but I remember hearing that Roan is returning this month.

I wonder if he's already there?

Or if he's heard something about me by now?

In all honesty, I'm just...tired. Tired of this back and forth between the village and Vaughn's cabin, tired of this back and forth with trying to learn useful information only to get nowhere.

It's getting exhausting.

But on the bright side, I guess I am in much better shape now. Walking through the snow for miles every week tends to have that magical effect.

And that's just about as positive as I'm going to get right now.

We walk in silence, not unlike the first time we went to the village together.

By the time we've reached the village, I'm starving, so I pick up the pace, aiming to get to the tavern in record time. As a result, Vaughn begins to walk faster also, falling into step beside me. He doesn't say anything about it, though.

I still feel uncomfortable about staying at the tavern, but if I work while I'm there, I won't feel as bad.

If Hayley and William were visiting, I would like to talk more with them, as they're fun people to be around. But unfortunately, chances are they probably are not.

After scanning the parking lot for Roan's truck and not seeing it there, I push open the door to the tavern, hearing the few voices from inside come to a halt.

I sigh, deciding I should start getting used to it, glancing around at everyone who is in here.

Benjamin, who hasn't particularly liked me from the start, one young woman who I remember asking about John, a man I've never seen before, and then Nina and Henry.

They're all at the bar.

The man who I don't know is seated at the farthest place to the left. Benjamin is a seat over to his right. The woman sits where Vaughn usually does--the last spot on the right side of the bar.

That leaves two places between Benjamin and the woman.

I start forward, deciding to sit next to Benjamin because I like talking with him for some reason. But after I take one step towards that seat, I feel two hands behind me on my waist, slightly guiding me a bit in the direction of the other chair.

Oh.

Vaughn probably doesn't want to sit next to the woman, who, I now notice, apparently hasn't taken her eyes off him since we entered.

So, I do him a favor and take the seat he guided me towards, and I'm pretty sure the woman's eyes narrow slightly in my direction.

How nice.

Vaughn sits to my left, and I watch as Benjamin shifts slightly, almost looking nervous. I stifle a laugh, turning to the familiar couple behind the bar.

"Hey, guys."

"Hi, did you two get here fine?" Nina asks.

I nod, "Yeah, the walk was pretty uneventful."

The woman to my right moves her gaze from Vaughn to me. "You walked here?"

I look at her, "Yes."

Oh, no. Vaughn, much?

"Why would you willingly do something like that?" She laughs slightly.

I shrug, not wanting to get into it. "Good exercise."

She nods, holding out her hand to me. "I'm Mya."

Shaking it, I introduce myself.

"Mikaere?" She replies. "I haven't heard that name before, I like it."

Before I can thank her, her eyes shift to the man beside me.

I internally sigh.

Of course.

"Mya," she holds out her hand to him in front of me, making me lean back in my seat.

I internally cringe as she does that, knowing how she'll probably feel when he ultimately ignores her and stays silent.

Except he doesn't.

He shakes her hand. "Vaughn."

She smiles, looking extremely pleased as she sits back in her seat.

And, by now, I'm a bit confused. Vaughn ignored Luna blatantly; why would he pay Mya any attention?

But immediately after I ask myself that question, I scold myself for sounding like a jealous girlfriend.

Maybe he's trying to be more courteous to strangers, actually acknowledging them. What makes you think you're entitled to be the only girl he speaks to?

Nina speaks up, "Are you two hungry?"

I nod, "Can I have pancakes, please?"

"Of course," she looks to Vaughn, who requests waffles.

"Waffles?" I ask him lowly, and he looks down at me.

"They're better than pancakes."

I scoff, "No, they're not."

Henry moves from his place where he was speaking to the unknown man, coming to stand in front of me. "Will you be working here again during your stay?"

"That's the plan, yeah."

He nods, looking glad before he walks off into the back room.

"So, Vaughn, do you like to hunt?" Mya resumes talking to him again, leaning forward.

I lean back, deciding to be a silent observer, much like how Vaughn was with the Mick guy and me.

"No."

No?

I didn't know that.

"Oh," she replies, sounding slightly confused. "Well, I do."

I think about something he once told me after he got the second deer. 'I don't like hurting animals.' I feel a pang in my chest as my mind flashes to Moose, beginning to drown out Mya when she launches into one of her own hunting and fishing stories.

I'm leaning back in the seat, and she's leaning in front of me, forearms on the bar. Ignoring me and invading my personal space just to chat with Vaughn.

And quite frankly, I hate her for it.

Something within me stirs when he actually bothers to answer her questions, even if they are just one-worded ones.

I've only ever been jealous of fictional characters or celebrities before, so this is a whole new experience, and I'm despising every second of it.

I mean, sure, it's not like he's flirting with her, but it's obvious she's trying to flirt with him. And, they're speaking in front of me like I'm not even here.

And I mean, yeah, I could speak up, but what would I say? I'd probably just stumble over my words and embarrass myself.

It doesn't help that she's pretty, either. She looks maybe twenty-two, shoulder-length dark brown hair. She has practically every feature going for her.

Except for her eyebrows.

They're as thin as my patience currently is.

She's still babbling on about how she once got, as she puts it, a 'twelve-pointer' with her crossbow the first night of the opening season.

Boring.

I'm bored.

And hungry.

I need something to focus on, something that doesn't annoy me.

And, I'm well aware that my jealousy in this situation is entirely irrational; he's not doing anything wrong by having a simple conversation with another girl. It's mainly just how desperate she seems, acting like I'm not even here.

But then, thankfully, I'm distracted by someone saying my name.

"Mikaere, right?"

I turn to the left, glancing over to see Benjamin.

"Yeah. Benjamin?"

He nods.

So now, I'm leaned back in my seat, looking behind Vaughn to speak with the man who, as I recall, is not too fond of me.

I appreciate the distraction, though. Another second of sitting between these two and suffering through Vaughn and Mya's exchanged words would have bored me to death, probably.

"So, how're you doing?" I ask, noticing in my peripheral as Vaughn glances at me. I ignore him.

"I've been better. You?"

"Yeah, me too."

"You look a bit...cramped there," he says as the stranger to his left gets up from his seat and walks out. "Gotta couple of free seats here. You can come and take one if you want."

Wow, who would've thought that he, of all people, would help me out?

Silently thanking him, I'm about to say yes when Vaughn places his right arm along the top of the back of my chair, around my shoulder, gaining my attention.

What is he doing?

He's been ignoring me to talk with Mya for the previous five minutes, and now he's putting an arm around my shoulder?

He looks at me, but I avoid his eye contact, glancing over to Mya.

She glares at me, blatantly.

And so, since I'm annoyed, as I did nothing wrong, I ask: "Why are you glaring at me?"

She looks surprised that I would straight up call her out on it, but she quickly covers it all up, putting on a fake smile when Vaughn looks at her.

"Sorry, wasn't directed towards you," she lies. "Just lost my train of thought thinking about something else."

I keep my face blank, opting to ignore her as I prepare myself to stand up and move.

In all honesty, I'm annoyed.

Sure, if Vaughn wants to talk to her, who am I to feel jealous about it? But then putting an arm around my shoulder when I start to speak with a guy?

Maybe the gesture didn't mean anything, and I'm overreacting.

But either way, I feel suffocated between these two at the moment, and moving sounds like a good idea to me.

Nina returns with a plate of pancakes and a plate of waffles. She sets the waffles down in front of Vaughn, but before she can give me the pancakes, Benjamin speaks up.

"You can put them here," he says, pointing to the place where the other man used to be.

Wow.

That's kind of bold.

Nina confusedly looks to me for confirmation, and I nod, sliding out of my seat passed Vaughn, who appears to clench his jaw for a split second.

I just ignore him.

Sitting down in the seat over from Benjamin, I dig into my pancakes after Nina places them down in front of me, and I thank her.

"Would you like me to put your bag upstairs?" Nina asks, and since my mouth is full, I can't answer right away.

Vaughn does, though. "I can."

Why would he do that?

I watch as he stands up from his seat, grabbing both my bag and his before walking to the back room.

"Up the stairs, the first door you see," she calls to him, and he nods.

My eyes unintentionally land in Mya's direction, who tries to raise one of her thin little eyebrows at me.

I simply smirk at her failure, turning back to my pancakes.

They're good pancakes.