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"Hey Ky," I say, looking up from starring at my feet.

"Hey Stan," Kyle says.

"Your voice sounds dead," I point out.

"Why does everything just have to go to shit?" Kyle asks.

Kyle's words, along with the tone, immediately get me worried.

"Dude. What's wrong? We saw each other at dinner like four days ago. What happened?" I ask.

"I've had trouble with... well, um, eating disorders," Kyle says.

"Wait. What?" I ask.

"It's like... I feel like I'm falling back again. I was fine. I mean, I was really good, for a week or two but now it's shit again and I don't know. Plus, I almost couldn't get up this morning, that's the least of my worries to be honest," Kyle says.

"Yeah. Lets go back a bit. What were you struggling with?" I ask.

"Well... I don't know, if it classifies. I, fuck, this is so hard to talk about," Kyle says.

"Go on. I'm not judging," I say.

"I was setting very unhealthy amounts of calories per day and my body somehow threw the rest out, if it could. I'd faint a couple of times a week. I don't know. Basketball was kinda my escape from that shit, as well as you and the rest. I don't know. I don't want to fall back, please, I really don't want to. It was the worst time in my life and I still haven't gotten the weight back, let alone become ready for this again, mentally or physically. I don't want this, I really don't," Kyle says.

"But isn't it kinda easy to control? If you don't want it, it shouldn't come. I'm sorry, if that's insensitive. I don't know shit about these things," I say.

"It's not like that. To be honest, it's the first thought you have. 'Oh I should probably lose some weight.' 'Traditional way is not fast enough.' 'I could try this.' Afterwards, it consumes everything. It was easy for me to hide because my eating didn't look different, I just puked most of it out. Even mom didn't notice, nobody did. I don't want to feel like it again, but the same 'voice', just to clarify, I don't actually hear voices, it's a metaphor. Anyway, the voice is coming back again and it's so much easier to listen to it. I'll die, if this keeps happening, I'm sure of it," Kyle says.

"You're good the way you are," i say.

"I wish it was that easy, really do," Kyle says.

"Kyle. I'm here, if you need it. You are going to get through this, you have to. You're too young to die, too amazing to hate yourself. Please Ky," Kenny says.

"Where the fuck were you?" Kyle asks.

"Just by there. I was about to say 'sorry for eavesdropping', until you mentioned eating disorders and I decided to stay to listen in case Stan hurt your feelings," Kenny says.

"Hurt my feelings? How weak do you think I am?" Kyle asks.

"Not like that, you're strong. It's just a sensitive topic for many people and I thought that Stan could hurt you because of how sensitive that spot clearly is," Kenny says.

Kyle nods and hugs Kenny, holding onto him like Kenny just saved Kyle's life.

"Thank you, thank you so much," Kyle says.

I notice that Kenny is crying, hugging Kyle tighter and tighter.

"I don't want you to hurt. You don't deserve it, at all. Don't die, don't feel bad, just give all the pain to me," Kenny says.

"Why would you deserve it?" I ask.

Kyle nods.

"More than Kyle does," Kenny says.

"No you don't! Nobody deserves any pain. Seriously. People should be able to throw their pain in the air and shoot it with a fucking shotgun, let all the pain explode into pieces," I say.

"Oh none of us would have enough bullets to use," Kyle says, chuckling.

I nod.

"Hey guys," Butters says, half-happily walking to us.

"Why so happy?" I ask.

"The student council finally respects me! It took ages but now they respect me! Why are you all so sad?" Butters asks.

"Butterfly. Lets go to the side for a minute," Kenny says.

He takes Butters by the hand and drags him away. His mouth moves very quickly, probably explaining the situation to Butters, who looks at Kenny with a serious face before they come back.

"When you fall back, I'm personally putting you in some sort of help group. I'm here for you. The minute that happens, I'm getting doctors on it. You are not being without us in case you throw up. If you throw up, we will get you into a help group that minute. Understood?" Butters asks.

Kyle hugs him as well, crying slightly. I'm probably crying as well. No can do, I guess. And of course Butters starts crying.

Why is everyone crying? I know why, obviously, but nobody cares about their masculinity here, I guess. Wow.

"I love all of you," Kyle says.

Kenny joins the hug, dragging me into the hug as well.

"We're like penguins. I'm in the middle, the one keeping warm," Kyle says, chuckling a little.

We all laugh, although it sounds like crying because of the fact we were just crying minutes ago.

"My laugh sounds like a dying seal," I say, smiling.

"Same," Butters and Kenny say.

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