868 Words

"If you were to ever have kids, what would you name them?" Sidon says absentmindedly from beside me. He traces little shapes on my hand with his finger; circles, stars, outlining the Triforce symbol.

I sign with one hand, "Never having kids."

He snorts. "What are you, nine? Alright, no kids, but what if?"

"Don't judge. For a girl, Iri, because it means fire and light. For a boy... Cato. I had a friend named Cato. It means smart, and if I have kids, they are not going to be idiots like you. And? Your turn."

"How lovely." I deadpan. "For a girl, Ora. For a boy, I don't know."

"You do know Ora means money, right?"

"Yeah. But it sounds pretty."

There's a long bout of laughter from me, quiet, breathy laughing. I hate my laugh. It sounds weak and girly. "In all seriousness, kids are dumb and I'm never having any. Besides, I'm happy where I am right now, just us."

"I don't know if that was meant to be a compliment, but it makes my heart warm."

I try and think of him as a parent, and I imagine what kind of life we'd lead. Definitely a chaotic one, I immediately conclude, since my responsibility skills are a nat zero. Our kid would grow up with one calm parent and one who screams profanities whilst yeeting knives across the kitchen.

Yes, I did that. It was fun, for me; the wall was a bit dead after though. I snicker at the thought.

"Why do you care about kids? They're assholes."

"Well, the truth is, my father is harassing me about a family and an heir."

I wince. I should've figured this is why, with him being royalty and all. "Just tell him you're gay and yeet yourself out of there. He'll get it and stop harassing."

The Sheikah slate fumbled over the word yeet for a long time before finally pronouncing it "yet". I'll have to program that word into the database. Sidon hums as he considers this. "Well yes, that'd get him off my case about a wife, but kids can be procured without being married."

Ew! "A concubine? That's gross."

"I know. I'm trying to persuade him otherwise without saying we're together, but that's hard. Especially since he ships it."

I pause. Ships it? Really? Honestly, King Dorephan is a teenage girl trapped inside the body of a king. I sigh quietly and take his hand in both of mine. We could get married, make a big affair about it, and everyone would be so surprised that the idea of children would be pushed away for a long while.

Not forever.

I wish there was some magic way you could just... make a child. Like poof, there's your kid. Just say a spell and clutch your bible or something like that. Well, not the Bible. Some other magic book.

I stare at the ground, squinting, as if I could see beyond this empty blackness in my head.

"Tell him about us. I don't care, and he'll get off your case."

"I don't know about that. He'd just tease me." Sidon laughs at the idea. "Yeah. And Muzu would flip out. His loathing for you has transcended time itself."

We have a good laugh at Muzu's expense, then the silence settles in again as we ponder our predicament. I don't really want to think about it right now.

I push the thought to the back of my mind.

Alright. That's it. I stand, startling Link, and briskly take the ring out of my desk drawer. I open the box and stare at the jewel, feeling like crushing it. This was all fun and games until Muzu brought up the damn concubine, and I stormed out, angry, slamming the throneroom door behind me. I heard my dad curse quietly at Muzu after.

Just to piss them off, I'll marry him right now.

"Link," I sit back down, holding the small box close to my chest. "we're alone, and I need to talk to you."

He looks at me confusedly but says nothing. I take his left hand in mine and place the small box inside, opening it. He clearly hears the noise, the clop, and blinks twice slowly.

"What are you doing? What's this?"

"Shush."

"Is this a ring?"

"Link, will you marry me?"

His face goes from shit, what? to pure joy. He waves his hands around in front of him in half-signs of yes, trying to articulate a response, but after a minute he just leans over and kisses me, nodding. I slip the ring on his finger in the middle of the kiss with a laugh.

He fiddles with the ring when we pull apart, running his fingers over the small blue gem and around the silver band. It's a nice ring that looks even nicer where it belongs on his finger.

"Do you think anyone will notice?" '

"Maybe, but you're good at lying, and you wear pretty weird jewellery." I look at his earrings, which today are ruby pendants in the shape of stars. "Not too far-fetched that you got a wedding ring for non-marital purposes."

He snickers, holding his hand close to his chest.