"Jasmine" he spoke almost without noise

"No" I repeated, the only word I could speak, the only word to explain the possibility of him being real, alive, in front of me

"Jasmine" he repeated again, seemingly struggling with his own approach, taking slow steps towards me

"You died" I shook my head "you died"

He shook his head slowly, approaching me with caution "I did, yes, but when they put me in the ambulance.. they started CPR, and I came back.."

I fought back the urge to throw up, watching him as tears dripped down my neck

"I couldn't.. I needed you to believe that I was gone, it was the only way I could keep you safe.."

"How could you do that.." I spat quietly, rage beginning to form at the reality of what had gone on behind my back

He was becoming close, and I tried to step back, but I had reached the wall, my back against it

"Why would you do that.." My heart was bursting with both heartbreak and relief, I didn't know how to feel, I didn't know how to react

"When we'd heard that Wyatt was going to back off because I was gone, I thought it would be better to keep you safe.." he tried to explain, no excuse valid enough for me

"You let me believe you were gone.. you didn't have to do that" warm tears continued to fall "you could have told me.."

"I'm sorry Jasmine" he took one final step so he was standing directly in front of me, he eyes never leaving mine. He was struggling in the moment just as I was, I could see that

"I'm so sorry" he whispered, his hand lifting to my face, his palm against my cheek

It was an indescribable feeling, having someone touch you who you had believed for over 2 months to be dead. I had dreamt of one more moment with him, to touch him and tell him how much I had missed him, for just one more opportunity never thought to be possible.

I closed my eyes and when I opened them again, his forehead was leaned on mine. This was what I had wanted more than anything, to have him back, and here he was, in front of me, so without another thought, I threw my arms over him, pulling him close as I suppressed my sobs into his neck.

He held me as tightly as I held him, his arms wrapped around my middle, pulling our bodies as close together as we could.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" he continued to whisper into my hair, his fingers running circles around my back.

Eventually I had stopped crying, but I was not yet willing to let go of him. I had no idea how long we remained embraced for, I didn't care. It was only when I felt a small nudge inside my stomach that I jerked backwards, remembering.

"We should sit" Dawson held my face, a small smile on his lips before he pulled my hand to sit at the table in the centre of the room

"June.. she told me that I needed to come back.."

"June?" I repeated, and then it made sense, another blow "June knew you weren't dead?"

He nodded regretfully

"And Isaia and.. your mother?" I began asking questions, already feeling betrayed in the most cold of ways

"No, my mother found out this morning, so did Isaia" he revealed

I could only imagine how his mother had felt, if not worse than I had

"Why June, why did she know?"

June and Dawson had a rocky relationship, why had he trusted her with his secret above anyone else?

"It just happened that way with my captain, I guess it was a way for her to redeem herself for what she had done" he explained "she also cares about you, she wanted to make sure you would be okay.. I preferred her over Oliver Harding anyway"

I released a long sigh and leaned back in my chair, Dawson's hand and mine entwined, my fingers playing with his

"June, she told you to come back?" I asked, looking at our hands, placing pieces together

It was quickly understandable why she had reacted the way she had when I'd told her I was expecting. She knew he was alive, she knew that this was something that she couldn't keep from him. I was angry at June, but at the same time I felt bad for the position she'd been put in.

Dawson nodded "She wouldn't tell me why.. she said that I needed to see you, to talk to you, that things had changed.."

So June hadn't told him of my news, our news. I was thankful for that, but it made me scared because now I was going to have to tell him. I didn't know how he would respond to the idea, what if he hadn't wanted it? What if he pulled away and it ruined the second chance I had at getting Dawson back?

I was terrified.

My lips pulled together and I leaned forward again, looking to the floor. Another subtle nudge in my tummy made me flinch unintentionally, it was as though it could sense my nervousness, reacting with jolts and twists.

"Are you okay?" Dawson had noticed, squeezing my hand "you.. you seem different"

I suppressed a scoff, he had no idea.

"Continuous mental trauma does that to a person" it came out more snarky than I had intended, and when I looked up to him, I could see the pain in his eyes "Did you even want to come back?"

"Of course I did.. I just wanted to make sure you were safe first" he edged forward on his chair

"There could have been so many other options other than you pretending to die Dawson, I just can't.. I can't see the sense.." I sighed

"At the time it was the only one that made sense to us, and you're right, I should have fought for other options, I shouldn't have allowed you to believe what you did" he admitted

It was nice to know that he had regretted the decision he'd made. It was comforting to know that he felt sorry for having lead me to believe he was dead. It wasn't fair, for not only me, but his mother and Isaia too.

"So what happens now?" I asked, now that the secret was out, did it mean that Wyatt would seek revenge again, or had the time that had elapsed changed that?

"I don't really know, it all happened so fast, June called me last night and I was down here early this morning, she lead me to believe there was a sense of urgency for me to return.. at first I thought maybe you had fallen ill, or worse.."

Again, I looked down, unable to make eye contact with him knowing the news I was about to break. He'd missed almost half of my pregnancy, in a way, I guess there was a sense of urgency for him to know.

"What's going on Jasmine?" He took both my hands in his, and I felt a wash of emotions run through me

My heart rate had doubled and when I didn't respond, he lifted my chin with his fingers, forcing me to look at him

"I don't know how to tell you.." I mumbled

I could see he was worried for what I would reveal, so I tried to deliver the news as gently as I could.

I pulled my hands from his grip and with a sigh I began to take my remaining jackets off until I was only in my tight long sleeve shirt. Dawson was watching me carefully, unsure of what I was doing. He was focused on my face, so I moved my hands against my stomach, only slightly protruding, yet obvious to the fact.

His eyes quickly drew down, noticing the movement. He was quiet for a moment, realisation kicking in.

I was biting my bottom lip, hard, afraid, waiting for him to respond.

"You're.." he mumbled, his eyes then lifting back to my face as I nodded

"I found out after you.. after you died.."

His expression was indecipherable, taken back, shocked, just as I had been when I'd discovered the news. I was expecting him to be surprised, there was no doubt for that, it was the aftershock that I was concerned about.

"It didn't feel real, not until I went to the doctor and it started making me sick"

"Jasmine" Dawson whispered before pulling me close to him "I should have been there, I should have been there for you.." he spoke into my hair

"You didn't know, I hadn't told anyone.." I pulled back

"How far..?" He dropped his hands, his fingertips gently brushing against my stomach

"Almost 17 weeks" I told him, watching his face carefully as he made backwards and forwards lines with his fingers against the fabric of my shirt

He slowly shook his head with a sigh

"My mother, does she know?"

"Not unless June told her" I shrugged

"She's going to be overwhelmingly excited, just so you're aware" he smiled, the first sign of acceptance from him coming to light

"And you?" I asked directly, needing to know

He was smiling, and it made my heart skip

"I mean, it's a huge surprise, and I'll need some time to really.." he trailed off, his eyes moving down to his fingers on my belly, absorbing the information "I know nothing about this kind of thing" he whispered lowly, laughing

Seeing him so nervous, it made me laugh with him. He was apprehensive, but so was I. I just needed to know we were on the same page.

"Neither do I" I told him "but apparently they have books that are supposed to help, I don't really know.."

He continued to laugh, taking a more full grip on my stomach as he leaned forward, kissing me

"Well we'll have to find these said books, won't we?" He spoke against my lips

And that was enough for me.