Chapter 46

“This is absolute bullshit,” he murmured just as we walked into my history class. I sighed, knowing he would get pissed. But hell, in my eyes, today was going great. Just imagine what he would have thought yesterday.

“It’s not that bad. And if I think that, what’s your issue? It’s me they are harassing after all,” I pointed out as I headed towards an area where there were two seats open. Feeling other student’s eyes following me while they also filed into class, I brushed it off and we took our seats. Since all the staff here were informed that Francis would attend all my classes with me, they would treat him as if he weren’t there. But he could still sit with me, next to me and appear as if just another student. Most students didn’t know that; they assumed Francis was another student and therefore, they gave him menacing looks as well.

“Well, I am sorry if I get a little upset at hearing kids scream at you to ‘shake your fine ass’ or to ‘get the fuck away and out of here.’ Scream at you how you are a slut, a killer, a useless bitch. I’m sorry if that bothers me Albany especially when I hear all that in just less than a few minutes ago in the hall.” Francis was clearly upset about this. I mean, he was handling it well but now, by third hour, it was just getting irritating for him. Like I said: thank god he wasn’t here yesterday.

“Damn,” I said chuckling at his scowling lips. “You’re starting to sound like Luke.”

He sat back in his chair as people around us took theirs, the whispers starting as well as the multiple stares I could feel. He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, getting control. Opening his eyes, he glanced to me and met mine. I watched as the anger slowly drained away from his expression and all that was left was a small smile after he took in my words,

“Sound like Luke? Should I take that as a complement? After all, to you, he must have a sexy voice.”

I laughed, shaking my head. “Shut up.”

The bell rang again, signaling the start of class. Mr. Harris came into sight as he stood up from behind his desk and walked around to the front. Looking around at the kids that were still talking, his eyes caught mine and I recalled our little chat we had yesterday. His eyebrows lowered, his eyes narrowed and I smiled politely at him, waving and making Francis chuckle under his breath. We had a similar experience happen last hour with Mrs. Dugan, the one I bitched out yesterday. Unlike Mr. Harris, she kept her head down and a scowl on her face. Mr. Harris was too proud. After all, the teachers were given a strict message after Luke’s outburst in the principal’s office.

Unlike yesterday, today we had work to do. He handed us our text book and told us to define every term from chapter one. It was natural for me just to not do it, put it aside, and wait for class to end. That was my whole school career –doing nothing. Luke though wanted me to try because he said he would get me a better life, a good future. I knew he was trying so I guess I would too.

As I started on my work, I heard whispers around me but I ignored them. I also ignored Mr. Harris’s mean looks. But I couldn’t ignore what came into my eyesight as I was looking through the book.

A piece of paper slid into my vision next to my book on the table from where Francis was sitting. Sitting back, I looked at the note he passed me.

Luke was looking at you this morning. A lot. He wanted you.

Turning towards him, I met Francis’s amused eyes at my blank face. I mean, seriously? He was distracting me from my work when I am actually willing to do it. And with nonsense.

He gave me a wide smile and I shook my head, scoffing. It was too quiet – besides the constant whispers of course – to openly speak at a normal volume. I leaned closer to him and in a small whisper, used his words from earlier. “This is absolute bullshit,” I smirked. “He was not.”

He nodded and smiled, meeting my eyes and gave me a white perfect smile. I bit my lip as I took in his words. “Yes he was. When you weren’t looking, his eyes were all over you. All over you,” he nodded, making me laugh at how persistent he was being with this.

“You know, you could have told me that on our way here. Or any other time after that happened. You’re trying to distract me now from doing my work.”

His eyebrows lowered and he acted defensive – which made me try to stifle my chuckle.

“Hey, I sat through two classes patently. Plus, I had to deal with all these annoying teenagers. Either they are insulting you or they are flirting with me!” He complained.

“Flirting?” I asked, laughing. “Where the hell was I when this happened? Talk about absolute bullshit….”

He smiled, shaking his head and leaning in more to whisper in my ear. “You were looking the other way because you started to get jealous,” he nonchalantly put it. “Don’t deny that you think the Prentas’ are some sexy ass men.”

I smiled, shaking my head and chuckling at how funny he could be. I saw Mr. Harris giving us a suspicious look at how talkative we were getting. Turning back to the table, I grabbed the note he wrote to me and scribbled my own words, knowing I would be pushing it to talk back to him when Mr. Ass was watching.

Luke is desperate. He wouldn’t be looking at me; he’s got a wife.

I wrote, getting back on topic, and then I passed it to him. Watching his expression as his face was tilted down, reading, I admired the natural smile on his lips. They slowly tilted up and he glanced back to me, shaking his head in clear disagreement that made me roll my eyes. He took my pen and wrote something else down before sliding me the paper.

Luke’s desperate because of you. He’s beating himself up over you.

Oh how I would love to believe that. I wrote back to him on the same sheet.

That still makes no sense! Just drop it and let me go back to work. I know how awesome it must be to talk to someone as great as me but I really need to focus on my work. And you need to keep guard.

As he read the note, I couldn’t help myself from smiling at his appalled and outraged expression. He slowly turned to meet my gaze and he raised his eyebrows in question.

“Keep guard? What am I, your bitch?” he asked me quietly.

I nodded. “What else would you be here for? You’re here to protect me. Bitch.”

Yeah so that hour was a waste of time and because of him, I now have homework to do. But it was fun because it was with Francis

Before the bell rang, Francis escorted me out and towards my next class. We got permission to do so by the school with what all happened yesterday. Waiting by Mr. Rush’s door, the bell rang and the kids filed out. Francis was tense and nervous with every time we walked through the halls even though empty. His arm draped around me, we waited for all the kids to leave and as they saw me, we walked into the classroom where they couldn’t touch me in the presence of a teacher. Francis dropped his arm from around me and just before Mr. Rush saw us, he whispered in my ear, “Just tell me if you want my arm to stay around you at all times and it will.”

I blushed and smiled, looking down before I saw Mr. Rush come into view, his smile polite and somewhat amused as he walked towards us.

“Hey, Francis,” Mr. Rush said as we were now the only ones in his room since the bell just rang. He patted his back, greeting him. “It’s been a while.”

Francis laughed as he looked him up and down. “Wow, look at you man. You look so different and professional. I bet you’re a pedophile; what else would a guy like you be doing here teaching?”

Mr. Rush smirked at his humor. “I’m interested in teaching and the job! Not the students.”

“I bet your new fiancé would disagree. Hypocrite.”

He laughed hard at that and I assumed it was some inside joke or something. “Shut up.” He shook his head, smiling at him. Sighing, Mr. Rush went on. “Anyway, you look quite different too since I saw you last. You really cleaned yourself up,” he nodded with approval and gave him a praising smile.

Francis grinned and looked down, flattered obviously. “Thanks. A daughter will do that to you.”

Students started to file in and take their seats, the whispers already starting as did the laughter. Looking around, I could already see their eyes on me. Glancing back to where he stood before us, I saw his brown and kind eyes shift to me and he smiled with sympathy. “Are you doing okay today? I hope it wasn’t as rough as yesterday.”

I nodded. “It’s better. But I mean I’m use to this stuff. Thanks though for yesterday. I heard you were concerned and addressed it.”

He smiled. “You’re welcome, of course. You don’t deserve the BS everyone gives you.”

Class soon started and it was an average class hour. The chick that tricked me into sitting with them at lunch to get drugs out of me was shooting daggers at me. Other than that, Mr. Rush and Francis kept me in their eye. It was a nice break.

By the time lunch came, Francis went through the line with me and we both got something to eat. A few yelled at me like usual and I could tell Francis was getting pissed off. We walked towards an empty table that was off to the side and further away from the others. By the time we sat down without words between us, I knew he had something to say. Francis sat across from me, his eyes meeting mine and he could only stare at me until the silence that started to grow became too much.

“What? Do you have something to say?” I asked, wondering.

“Oh nothing, nothing. Just didn’t expect you to just take everybody’s shit.” He said as he took a bite of his food. All humor gone, he looked at me and waited for an answer as he chewed.

I raised an eyebrow at the amount of pain he was showing through his eyes. He hated what I was going through, pissed at the people putting me through this, and confused at why I was taking it. “What did you assume I was doing? Fighting back?”

“Uh yeah, yeah I figured that’s what you would do. That’s what you should do. Kick their sorry asses,” he said in an aggressive voice.

I chuckled and shook my head as I took a bite of my food.“I’ve tried when I was younger, and it doesn’t help when you’re insane. If I do, it makes it worse. It never stops and after a while, it just isn’t worth it. People figure that with my personality, I would fight back and be aggressive. And on the inside, I do. But I can’t act on it. I grew up getting beat down and it’s just a part of my life. It’s not a big deal for me.”

His lips seemed to fall into a deeper frown. “I just don’t get it,” he said.

“Get what?”

“How you… go on. I mean, before when we use to hang out years ago, I assumed you were tough about it all. That you were okay. We were mean and cruel, I remember. I thought you became cold like that to hide it. But now, you tell me you really just take this harassment people hand to you… I mean, fuck.”

“Well, every time we hung out, you never saw anybody pick on me like you are now. You saw me as the bully, not the victim. I was a bully for the fact that it was pay back. Pay back for being the victim all my life. But beyond our little group of friends, you never saw that I always – and I mean always – was the victim.”

He bit his lip, eyebrows dipping in hurt and he looked away. “I never knew that. I knew you had a hard life but I thought… I thought it changed you. I thought it made you not a victim.”

I shook my head. “And therefore I can’t really say how I go on. It would be easier if I started being mean and stood up for myself. I don’t know why I’m not like that. I figure I should be just like Clare and I’m not. I’m not a cruel person really. I just was when I couldn’t handle it. I think I can handle it because of the fact that it happened since the day I was born, that abuse. I was raised getting beat down. You hear about people that get bullied after moving to a new school and not being able to take it. You hear about them committing suicide. But what people don’t understand is that unlike them, I was abused forever. Others can’t handle it because they go from a good life to one where there is abuse. They go to a low level. I never could go to a low level because I was already there. I grew up with the same treatment and you just adapt to it I think.”

His eyes on mine the whole time, he absorbed every word like it was such an interesting thing to think about. I mean, it was in a way. It was a miracle that I really wasn’t crazy after all I’ve been though.

Francis reached across the table and grasped my free hand, holding it as he continued looking into my eyes with absolute sorrow. “I’m sorry I don’t know what it’s like. I’m sorry that nobody probably does. You’re so fucking strong for the fact that you don’t physically fight back. I mean…you’re just amazing.” He gave me a small smile at those last words and I felt the heat at the contact with his hand. It sent sparks up my arms and his eyes seemed to scar my heart as it seemed to speed up. I looked back into his eyes. I smiled slightly back to him and was happy he was here for me.

“Hey, you’re that crazy bitch everyone is talking about,” I heard from a voice behind me. Speaking of abuse….

I turned and saw who spoke. This smug dude walk towards me, his light brown hair longer and stopped at his shoulders. His face held thin lips, a big nose, and eyes that looked to have just found the winning prize for the day. He held a bottle of pop in his hand he got from the vending machine as he made his way over. Getting to where we were sitting, he stood next to the table and toward over us from where we were sitting. His eyes in mine, taunting, I saw him then focus his attention on Francis. Looking back to him as well, I saw he was defiantly not in the mood for this shit. Especially now after I just told him everything.

“And this must be the bastard that supports the work of a killer. I bet you get special favors from the little bitch to protect her.”

This wasn’t the first time someone confronted us today. Of course, it ended quickly with a couple insults and threats from Francis. But now, he was beyond pissed off.

Francis took in a sharp sigh, clearly not wanting to deal with this shit. I felt bad for him being here. I could handle the day like yesterday but Luke wouldn’t have it. I can openly imagine what he would have done if he were here instead.

Francis stood up and looking up and between the two of them, I saw that they were about the same height, Francis maybe a little taller. He scowled at him and his eyes were threatening. “Don’t fuck with us. She might be too proud to kick your boney little ass but that won’t stop me. That’s the whole reason I’m here. So don’t think you’re some intimidating little shit just like everyone else here.”

The boy only smiled and looked back to me. He took a few feet back and towards where I was sitting. Looking up at him in disgust, I watched as he slowly tilted the bottle he had in his hand over me and the next thing I knew, he poured it over my head. I gasped as the cold and sticky liquid reached my skin and face, droplets cascading down my face and clothes, down to my pants. It was clearly a full bottle because I was absolutely drenched. I was frozen in place, breaths hard as the horrible process happened. Of course, when the sticky brown liquid stopped falling, I got my vision back and looked around swiftly only to find Francis with his hands gripping the guys shoulder hard. Everyone watched in anticipation, most stared in interest, others laughed at me. My full attention though was on Francis.

He didn’t hesitate. He punched the guy hard in the jaw. I saw his strong hand on his shoulder didn’t let up and he held him back up after the impact made him jerk back. Francis got in another hit to the nose and he let him fall back.

He stared down at him, life and power in that gaze and it was clear he wanted him to get up and try to fight him. “Get up, you piece of shit!” he yelled at him and it was at that moment where I left my shocked state and realized something. I stood up and went over to Francis’s side instantly and grasped his arm.

“Francis,” I hissed at him. He didn’t look down at me; eyes remained on the moaning boy that was getting to his knees slowly. “You can’t do that; stop it. You can’t do that unless he physically does something to me that make it called for it!” He could get in major trouble for this.

Francis realized my words I think and looked down to me, a warm look in his eyes as they met mine and he shook his head. “It was called for,” he said in a low and raspy voice that sent shivers up my arm. A moment later though, we looked back to him. His nose was bloody and he was rubbing his jaw, obviously sore. A look came over him though that I found odd: he didn’t look surprised.

At this point, people were in action. The school staff was out here quickly and attended to the boy as they did to us. They didn’t look happy with Francis but they didn’t question him at the moment. When they looked at me and saw the mess I now was, they knew why Francis did it. They however didn’t know if it was needed for him to punch him though. Of course, they said they would talk later about it.

We watched as they led away the boy. Maybe to help him or suspend him. I don’t know. All I did know was that Francis was quickly guiding me out of the lunch room, his arm back around me even though I was sticky and covered in what tasted like Dr. Pepper (It was all over my face so of course I had a good guess).

“Where are we going?” I asked, feeling sticky and gross. Looking down at myself, I felt heat rise in my cheeks. A few people down the halls just stared at us, not knowing what to say. It was the quietest anyone has been around me here.

“You need to get yourself cleaned up. The man told me he was going to storage to grab you one of the school sponsoring outfits.” He said in a quiet voice. Turning the corner down a hall, we stopped when we got to a bathroom. Of course, it had to be closed for cleaning or something. We continued on down the halls until we got to the gym. Pausing for a moment, we went in and looked around until we saw the doors to the locker rooms. Standing outside of the door labeled ‘ladies’ Francis quickly left my side and peaked inside the door for a moment. Turning back around, he walked back to me coming back to me. He turned to look me in the eye, his hands now grasping my arms.

“I don’t think anybody is in there; didn’t hear anyone. Go in and clean yourself up. I’ll wait out here for that man to get you that shirt then I’ll come in and give it to you.”

I nodded and tried leaving his grasp to go into the locker room. But his hands tightened and he kept me there. Looking back up, I waited to see why he was holding me there. His hazel deep iris’ dug deep and he took a deep breath. “I am sorry. I should have been able to stop him before he did it.”

I chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, I’m fine.”

Pursing his lips, he looked like he wanted to say more. Sighing, he dropped his hands and gestured for me to go in and I did as he waited out there. Stepping into the large area, I found it eerie how quiet it sounded. I was in a school and nobody was yelling at me. I was by myself. Just… strange in a way.