"Cami? You've got a visitor."

"Coming."

Mori moved out of the doorway of her front living area and stepped aside so that I could be confronted with the reality of what my hiding away had done.

I hadn't seen Parker Hartingrove in two weeks.

Hands in his pockets, he turned to face me and I was hit with it all at once—the memories, the moments, everything.

The shock of it all.

Seeing his face, his eyes opened and filled with such a precious life that I had to look away.

It was torture seeing that on his face and knowing that his life had almost gone out completely.

"What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? Cami, are you serious?"

Mori cleared her throat and I stepped outside onto the front porch of her grandparents small home that I'd been staying in for the past two weeks.

I hadn't even had to go to school after the trauma of it all—Mori had been able to bring me all of my schoolwork and, of course, I'd gone above and beyond to finish it all ahead of time.

Nothing like a failed attempt on your life and the boy you loved almost dying to force you to want to dissociate by doing schoolwork.

Now, staring at the brother of said boy, however...I was starting to regret my decision for the radio silence.

"What the hell do you think I'm doing here? He's...he can talk, Cami. He finally has what he's been punishing himself over since his attempt. He's finally got what he was too scared to admit that he wanted, and he's miserable. Do you know why he's miserable? I'll give you one guess."

"Stop it, Parker."

His eyes were blazing with a fury I hadn't seen in them before.

His clothes were snug on his frame, filled out and healthy and glowing—Parker was absolutely glowing.

I could only imagine the shell of a person looking back at him.

"Why should I stop? I understand what's all happened, but pushing him away—pushing us all away? That's not helping. I can promise you that."

"How you do know that? I met you at your game and you pretended you never even met me, so why should I think that you'd ever even cared about me to begin with? Is this all about Grey, or are your feelings just hurt because I'm ignoring you?"

The confusion on Parker's face gave way to irritation.

"What are you talking about? We met on the bus on the way to the senior field trip to the museum."

"No. We didn't. We met at that scrimmage game at the beginning of school when you and Colton got into a fight. You don't even remember, I was insignificant to you then, just like I am now."

The vehemence in my tone that I spat his name out caused Parker to jerk back a step, but the bewilderment never left his eyes.

"Cami...I had a concussion. I was missing time for that whole day. There's a lot I can't remember, but that does not make you insignificant. I always thought you were so familiar to me, that was why I wanted to be your friend, to talk to you...and yeah, maybe I even wanted something more at the very beginning but you were drawn to Grey. I get it, I'm not bitter about it or anything—"

"Oh, thank you for not being bitter about a decision you never had any part of whatsoever."

"Okay, Jesus, Cami. Why are you so mad? What is wrong with you? You were fine that day you came to see Grey in the hospital, until you saw him. Then you just...you just booked it out of there like you were on fire. What the hell is going on with you? He needs you—"

"Okay and what about me?! I need someone too but I can't ask that of him, not after what he just went through! Not to mention what I just found out about your father. It's too much Parker it's just all too fucking much. Do you not get that? I needed to get away from that, from it all. I was so overwhelmed. Fuck, I almost died, too, Parker. He almost got away with it, too."

"What?"

There was that damn confusion playing out across his features, again.

"Colton. He almost got away with what he did to me the first time, and he almost got away with it the second. If Alec hadn't been there..."

"What do you mean, the first time?!"

"Parker, you cannot tell me you're this clueless. Please tell me you're joking."

"Cami. What happened the first time?"

His voice was lethal, filled with spikes and barbed wire.

"What the fuck do you think happened, Parker?! He. Hurt. Me. Rub two brain cells together and you'll get the answer."

He started panting, taking in deep, wheezing breaths.

"No. No no no no no..."

"Oh, yes. I've come to terms with it."

Mostly.

Two weeks of therapy three times a week was a start. I was getting there, but most times the memory was a sore, scabbed and bloody mess in my mind that I couldn't stop picking at no matter how much it hurt.

Therapy was telling myself that it was okay to let it heal and scab over, just a little bit.

And then the nightmares would rip it right off again.

"He was...he was in my friend group. I subjected you to him, at our house, at lunch...in the parking lot. I found out later what happened with the other girls, but I thought he'd just tried with you. Cami I—I am so fucking sorry I couldn't protect you."

Something broke a little bit inside my chest at his words.

"No one's ever said that to me."

No one had ever protected me before.

My throat burned as tears tumbled down my cheeks, but I didn't move to wipe them away.

"If you need him and he needs you, then why can't you just come back—for the both of you?"

"Because it's—"

Because it was too hard.

Because it was terrifying.

Because I was worried that since he could talk he'd say he didn't want me anymore because of what happened to me.

Because I'm scared he'll think I'm damaged goods and not worth it.

Because I don't think I'm worth it...

"I can drive you over there right now, Cami, I swear. He just got the all clear to go back to doing what he used to—going to school, exercising, anything he wants. You're going to see him."

He was going back tomorrow, just like me.

"Thanks for coming to let me know, but I'm staying here."

"Cami—"

"Thanks, Parker. I'll see you tomorrow at school."

He didn't get another word out before I closed the door in his face.

Mori didn't bother me for the rest of the night, but I didn't know if I appreciated it or hated her for it.

I was on fire on the way to school, riding alongside Mori in her grandmother's tiny two-door Mazda.

Kids were clustered around the cars in the parking lot, just like always.

They stared when we got out.

Pinpricks danced alongside my skin as each and every eye pinned me in place.

"Come on," Mori whispered encouragingly to me, but I was frozen.

Rooted to the spot.

A familiar motorcycle rumbled to life in the background and my heart stopped beating.

My thoughts stopped swirling.

My stomach dropped into my gut.

The chirping of birds filled the air with a symphony of song calls, bathing the atmosphere with a brevity of permanence.

Grey was here.

Grey was pulling into the school parking lot, and I hadn't seen him in weeks.

Hadn't cried with him. Hadn't spoken one word to him.

I'd only gazed into his open, alive eyes in that hospital bed, so similar to the one I'd just been lying in not hours earlier.

Because we'd gotten the call: Grey was alive. He was stable. He was in the ICU, but he was okay. He was going to be okay.

That life tether that I'd felt snap in my bones had come back to life, just like him. His soul returned to his body, and he was back, he was safe, he was there, there, there...

and I'd taken one look and left.

He reached out for me with a slow, steady hand, but I was already gone.

And now he was here, pulling up on the other side of the parking lot with an ocean of space and unsaid words hanging between us—a sea filled with what-ifs and broken promises to always be there for each other.

He was here and I had left him and—and suddenly I was hyperventilating, because there he was.

Bathed in sunshine.

Gilded in yellow light.

Dressed head to toe in black.

Shaking out his dark hair from the helmet and raking his fingers through feather-softness that I'd once had the pleasure of touching...before.

Kicking the stand up on his motorcycle and pulling the key out and pocketing it.

There he was...

Striding forward on sure steps.

There he was—

embracing Parker in the middle of the lot, and those were his lips...

speaking. Aloud. To his brother.

I wasn't the only one staring anymore; everyone's attention had turned to the golden boy and his shadowed brother.

The clouds parted as my feet took one, two, three steps forward.

His head snapped to me, and then,

and then

and then—

he was sprinting toward me and I couldn't control the sob that tore from my throat.

He was running and not looking back and I was flung into his arms before my brain could ever register the shock of it all.

His warm scent enveloped me and this was it—this was everything I'd ever wanted.

This was it.

I was home.