Chapter 25.

Gold Rush by Taylor Swift

"Look over here, Harry, please."

The photographer was pretty quiet, not like I had experience with them, Harry seemed a little lost. He played it off so well, I swore it was nearly unnoticeable, and I was jealous of it. I would've been so overwhelmed, he was so smooth and knew what to do even without guidance.

He wore an outfit that I thought was nearly pajamas. Of course he made it work, especially with the hat. It brought out the curls on his forehead. I knew of nothing else to do but stand a couple feet away from him, awkwardly. I caught his glances here and there, but he continued to be pulled back into a, to me, completely new part of his life.

The album didn't feel real until now. Of course it felt real when he was singing them to me with a guitar and a shy smile. This was real in the sense that so many people were going to see this exactly. The fact that there was a good portion of songs written about me on it; I couldn't begin to process that so I pushed away the idea continuously. I'd have to share him with people, and part of that felt like a very sweet thing to do. Until I thought of the privacy he'd lose and the comfort he'd lose. But he loved it, so it was okay. I could always be his comfort if things resorted to that.

I snapped out of it, realizing I was looking out at the sun that was fading over the Amalfi Coast. A four hour drive for this. I dare say it was worth it.

Another snap out of it came with the hands around my waist, sliding through my arms that wrapped around a cross body bag hanging over my shoulder.

"Oh!" "How's it going?" He grinned, coming in an odd amount of close to me. I tipped his hat back, pulling it off of his patted down curls as I resorted to laughing.

"I should be asking you the same question."

"We're taking a small break. I requested it."

"Ah, you did?" I teased. I quickly became aware of the people around us, the people that lived in their petal colored houses along this road that ran along the ocean.

There were some people screaming his name, sending me straight to my thoughts. Back out of them when he turned me away from it, obviously noticing a change in my face. "I'm sorry," He said quickly as he distracted me unintentionally with his finger tracing behind my ear.

I reached for my bag, stepping away. "It's okay."

His odd look should've told me something, but it didn't have the time with the calling of his name, Jeff and Harry's stylist had been trying to get his attention for a couple minutes now.

"So Harry," A man I didn't recognize came up to him. He seemed an overconfident fraud who refused to ever reveal his actual age to younger girls he tried to swoon, but that was merely my judgement from his voice and composure. I knew something was off about him from the moment he touched Harry's shoulder. "New album next month, aye? What's next for ya?" His ripping American accent was loud and stubborn in itself. I only felt so judgmental after seeing Harry's odd reaction to him.

"Um," Harry seemed to have been taken aback by the ever-insisting clock ticking down on his time. "Next month?" I asked him quietly.

I felt his hand on my back. "I haven't planned very far in advance yet. We're still waiting on things and I'm enjoying my time here at the moment." He turned all professional for a moment, again catching me off guard, though the previous was much worse to me. If the album was coming out next month... he would be leaving. It was inevitable.

The man left without me noticing.

"You look golden." He smiled a full smile, bearing his teeth and everything. Yes, he was trying to distract me. But when did I ever dispute distraction in the midst of foreboding sadness. It's how I got by in life, and it's worked up until now. Distraction was my most favorite of dangerous things.

It was then that I felt the sun on me and my stomach lost it's turning, I knew he was right. My insecurities left so quickly, hidden so well behind my smile and fluttering stomach that even I believed they weren't there. He turned and left me standing there, muttering in a specifically loud melodic tone, "You are golden."

I wanted to wonder what exactly that meant, but I felt that I knew exactly.

...

Death with Dignity by Sufjan Stevens

What he said earlier, about being golden. That couldn't be true, not when he was there where I was watching him with the sun shining nowhere but on him. Specifically on his eyelashes, which actually shined slightly like one of the stars that you have to squint your eyes and blink again to see for just a second.

He changed out of the outfit after the shoot, it didn't last very long. He wanted it to be inherently simple, and it allowed for us to spend the rest of the day and night in Amalfi. To my surprise, he came back in a white shirt and teal-blue swim shorts. "Up for a swim?"

"I am up," I said, oddly. "You're lucky I didn't know what to pack and resorted to packing everything." I changed in a tiny store that sat right along the edge of the road. It was filled to the brim with flowers, bouquets and dried ones hanging from the ceiling and every wall, mirroring one of my favorite places back in Florence.

"Posso usare il tuo bagno?" I asked an old man who was leaning over and adding purple hyacinth's to a bouquet of flowers. He smiled warmly and pointed me towards the bathrooms. Harry talked to the man the entire time I was in the bathroom. When I returned, the man had given him a flower and me, an excited smile.

Harry made his way over to me, taking a quick look back at the man for reassurance. Hands behind his back, he moved ever so slowly towards me as I stood in confusion. "What's going on here?" I questioned.

"Per te, mio ​​sole." He bowed, revealing an Aster. I giggled, absolutely sure I was blushing. "Harry, you know Aster means stars. Stelle, non sole."

He nodded excitedly, and I looked around for what popped into my head. It was conveniently right behind me, I pulled it's long stem from the stand and held it out to him. "Girasole." The man said from behind Harry.

"A Sunflower." I smiled. "Per te, mie ​​stelle."

...

"Just dive in!" He yelled to me after having done just that. "You're not scared are you-"

I rolled my eyes and dove in, gracefully if I say so myself. Sarah and Mitch stayed back home, it felt odd that I had become used to calling it home. Jeff was the only other with us besides the prep team and photographers.

I constantly watched Jeff completely obliterate H, dunking him under the water like little boys. I floated peacefully on my back, feeling the cold creeping upon us with the night. An innocent kiss on the cheek disrupted me, he swam away cheekily, aching for me to chase after him.

"Darby! We're heading in!" He reached out a hand for me, though I was still a couple feet away still from the rock he steadied himself on to help me.

"Thanks." I went to look up at the sky but he quickly reached for my cheek. "Don't look up yet." "I just wanted to see if—" I kept my head down and close to his, nearly resting my forehead on his.

"Of course, just not yet."

...

ICU by Phoebe Bridgers

"We don't have to leave yet, yeah?" Harry called to Jeff, who was already standing by the car.

He turned to me.

"What now?" I laughed, following his sudden lead. "Are you cold in just that?" He started back to the car to grab something.

"I'm fine." I called, though I was not fine, I was freezing with the night wind blowing on me in nothing but a swimsuit. He ran back faster than I could finish the sentence, with two sweaters in hand and an extra blanket.

"Pfft, thank you very much." I said while being handed the obviously warmer sweater. The other was a thinner navy cardigan, Harry took that one and gave me the chunky colorful one.

We walked along that coast for a while, he kept me from looking above me all along the way. It was until I asked where we were going that we actually made it to where H intended.

"This is it, actually." He said, nodding towards a small beach area. By small, I really meant small. It was nearly sheltered by rocks, and was probably only 15 or so meters long. I looked out at the ocean, accidentally catching a peak at stars that were closer to the horizon. I could hardly see the water at all, if it weren't for the moon there might as well have been nothing there. It was just thick and rolling ink that probably would have terrified me to go in. "How did you know about this place?"

"Truth?" He said, as if he were teasing me. I nodded my head. "I had no idea. Was just walking until I found something."

I threw my head back laughing as I lazily walked closer to the shoreline. "Wait wait wait wait wait-" He said, running up to me through bubbles of giggles. He pulled me into him, so abruptly that I slipped on the sand and pulled him to the ground. Before I could collect myself and stop laughing, I felt his hand guide my face towards his, still keeping me from looking up at the stars.

"What." I said, blatantly. I could feel his eyes on my eyes, my lips, my forehead even. "Hey-" I said, snapping him out of it.

He sneaked a peak up at the sky, as if to make sure it was still there for me. "Hold on a second, I'm trying to figure out the best way to make this perfect but also not cheesy."

I lay there on my side, in the sand. His hand covered my eyes gently, as I rolled onto my back. He kept it there, on my eyes, leaving me in shaking excitement. "Are you ever going to take your hand off-"

"Nope. Never." I could hear him smiling, I would've given anything to have seen it. It was the kind of smile that graced every bit of him; a scrunched nose, closed eyes, soft dimples.

He came closer to me, taking my hand and sliding it into the hand that once covered my eyes. I let it rest on his stomach without really thinking about it, I was captivated already.

There were more than there were even in Florence. And they were everything to me. I don't think it was just them that meant everything to me.

Only a couple of seconds passed and I turned my head towards him, watching what I swore was a distinct reflection of the sky in his eyes.

"Are you not going to look at them?" He asked, realizing that he was all that I was looking at.

I made a thoughtful face, sarcastically pretending to think deeply, waiting a couple moments for the words to process in my head. "No. I think I'm good." I sat up, pulling my legs to my chest.

"Oh yeah?" He followed close behind, pulling his legs up the same way.

There was a feeling there that surprised me, in the sense that even now I don't believe I could put enough complicated words to it.

"There's a poem I know. By Amos Russel Wells. I remember loving it when I was younger without ever being able to even fully process it. It's called The Stars Above the Sea. Just like this." I nodded ahead of us. He gave me silence, allowed me to continue in the feeling as I tried my best not to shatter it.

"I'm not sure I remember all of it, but I forced myself to memorize most of it last year."

"...Far, far away one mystery greets another vast and high, The infinite of waters meets the infinite of sky..." I kept my eyes focused out on the barely-visible horizon, and felt Harry do the same.

"The stars are singing hymns of calm above the sea's unrest... hm..." I remembered most of the poem without difficulty, but the distraction rooted in Harry holding my one hand with both of his, playing subconsciously with the tips of my fingers.

I smiled softly. I skipped to the end, it was my favorite part."...The sweet solution finds, where earth's tumultuous yearnings know the peace of heavenly minds? And still the sky's imperial grace, the tossing ocean mars; We cannot see the meeting place, But we can see the stars." My voice grew softer and softer.

He smiled in admiration, but I was quite sure he had no words. "It's such a pretty way to think."

It was perfectly quiet, I wanted nothing more out of the universe.

"I see you so differently now, Darby." He sprung out of nowhere. "...What?"

"Who knows what it is, I think I'd fail if I tried to explain it. All I know is that you're much... wiser. Than I ever expected. You've always been smart," I wondered exactly what he meant. A compliment like that felt disconnected from who I thought I was.

"But I think, uh, I just admire you for that. You're sweet and innocent, but you're far above the world, and humble at that. An aesthete... you have a thoughtfulness to creativity like I've never seen. And the way you think... it's too beautiful for anyone to deserve, I believe the word for that is eunoia but I have no idea how to use that in a sentence."

"...It's used as if it were a possession. Your eunoia, my eunoia, their eunoia." I informed him, a guilty pleasure.

"It sounds beautiful out of your mouth." With that was silence again, a sweet shy silence.

He was the master of breaking silence himself, I supposed he was as comfortable with it as I was. "Darby, the song I played last week in the studio, do you remember?"

He was going to ask me. Finally. I'd almost forgotten but it stayed hidden in the back of my head since the moment I heard the lyrics. And since Jeff told me about Harry's intentions on the title. Finally.

"I was wondering if I could title it after you."

"I-" He laughed at my response. A peek at the stars... "Absolutely."

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