I spent the whole night crying and weeping into my pillow. My mother or Maria hadn't even heard me come in, Hazalen and I made sure to be extra quiet.

Hazalen was so drunk she passed out on the bed so I had time to myself to reflect.

After my encounter with Damien happened I just left the castle, it was sickening to even be in there. Thank goodness it was a masquerade ball or else you would see me crying until there was no more water left in my body. My mask hid all the emotions I was feeling on the inside.

I guess that's what you always do though, huh Damien?

Fury, sadness, betrayal, rejection and most of all stupidity.

How stupid was I to believe somebody like him could see something in me? I thought he actually liked me, that we had a chance at something great.

Also that he would stay loyal to me. He is the Prince of Deltora, he can have anybody he wants forever and always, yet he would want to settle down with me? Where was the logic in that?

The last thing I expected was Veronica, my best friend. We had shared so many great memories together the past three months... and she does this. Go behind my back when she knows the lust I bare for Damien. What was she gaining from this? From betraying me?

Or maybe the real question is, what was she gaining from being my friend. After the gossip of the prince being "interested in me" went around she became my friend. Veronica's advice rang in my head again... she warned me about Damien before we were even friends. About how it's all a game of cat and mouse.

Well then I guess I was the godsdamn cheese then, Veronica.

Your bait you so badly needed.

And it worked.

______________

"Um.... Mrz. Woodz?" Maria felt my forehead. I drenched a hot towel and warmed my face up with it, so that when Maria came in my face would be hot.

"I don't feel so good... I don't think I should go to school today Maria." I groaned out.

Dang I'm such a good actress.

"What if I made some of my cheeze gritz?" Maria bribed me, her hand propped up on her tiny waist. One of my eyes peaked open.

Oh how I loved her grits.

But no, I just can't face Damien. I need one more day to process everything and figure out where I go from here.

"No, I don't think that will just do it Maria. My head really hurts. I also have such bad cramps." I held my stomach. Maria gave me a pity look. That was always the guilty card, every girl has been there and done that.

And Mother Nature really was not helping me out with figuring out my emotions this weekend.

"I guez one day won't hurt Mrz. Woodz. Let me tell your mother," Maria rushed out of the room. I sighed to myself, propping my head up on my arm and staring at my reflection in the mirror across from my room.

My bedspread was in all different directions, completely messed up. My pillow was wrinkled and a little wet from last nights crying; not quite dry yet. My long hair was in knots and waves of frizzy brunette.

And my face...

Let's just say I looked like Maria's grits gone wrong.

What to do?

How do you face somebody after an event like that? I'm just so confused. I don't know what to say or how to start confrontation when I don't even know how they feel about it. Should I confront him? How am I supposed to know when I can't even figure them out myself?

Did he not like me? Was it all in my head?

Probably.

Was Veronica just using me to get to Damien?

Yes.

Could I remain just friends with Damien after what I saw?

No.

No... no I could not. I don't even want to talk to him. I won't confront him about it, he can do what he wants to do and I'll just... do me. I'll tell Hazalen what happened and we won't talk to Veronica.

I don't know much about friends, but I definitely know friends stay loyal. And there was nothing loyal about that.

I know, I know... I'm just running away from my problems.

But sometimes you just need to run away to realize what really matters, who cares, and what to do.

How do you fix something if you don't know what is broken?

~~

Maria gratefully brought me lunch in bed. I was cross legged with a large piece of paper in front of me. I was sketching out a face. I didn't know who I was going to draw yet. Instead I just let my imagination flow on the paper, the chalk scraping against the cream board creating a sculpted jaw.

As soon as Maria walked in I put my facade back up. I rubbed my temples and groaned in pain, putting up a quite a great act.

"What are you doing Mrz. Woodz?" She placed the bread and cheese along with the grits on my nightstand.

"Drawing something... I don't know who this is yet." I glanced down at my drawing. He was familiar, as if I had pulled him from my memory deep down.

"Um, Mrz. Woodz..." Maria seemed scared as she analyzed the picture, her eyes gazing over every detail with a frown," You should not draw such tingz," she started to take it from me.

"Why? Stop Maria," I chuckled but Maria didn't seem fazed.

"You should not draw this man ever again," Maria gave me a disappointed look. I have never seen her so livid before, I had no idea what was going on with her.

"Why? What is wrong with it?"

"The person who you drew."

"Who is it?" I ask curiously. I glanced down at the paper, confusion across my face.

Who did I draw that caused such familiarity? I didn't understand what was going on.

Maria succeeded to take the paper from me," No need to worry who, just eat your lunch and find something else to do." She snapped. I gave her a bewildered look and watched as she walked out the door.

What was up with that?

I read a book I found in the attic while unpacking in the meantime, until Maria would collect my food. As soon as Maria took the empty silverware out of my room I locked the door and proceeded to take out another piece of paper.

I was going to find out who this man was one way or another. I drew him again, but this time more detailed. His nose was wider in this, but his jawline more sharp. Blue-green eyes that shone through the paper, as if he was alive and staring right back at me. I got lost in the artwork, adding little details I felt like was needed or felt... right. I was pulling the image from the back of my head one by one, detail by hand.

I knew this person from somewhere, somehow.

And I was going to find out who he was.

"Mrz. Woodz!" Maria banged on my door. She sounded so formal... so attentive. "Please let us in Mrz. Woodz!"

Us?

I dashed and threw the artwork under the bed, the chalk in my marble drawer. I unlocked the door to find Maria with a bright smile on her face, forced.

"You have a visitor, Mrz. Woodz. He came by to make sure you were feeling alright."

He?

Oh no.

She stepped to the left, to reveal a tall persona behind her.

"Well I'll just... leave you both to it!" She giddily speed-walked away. If she is under the impression that Damien, the Prince, actually values my feelings then she better think twice.

"Annalise," he took a step forward.

But I took a step back.

And slammed the door in his face.