ALEC

The moment Clary left I practically ran to Jace's room. I knew he had been suffering in silence. And I knew I told Clary to give him space, but I couldn't help myself.

I reached his room and my fist was just about to hit the door, but then I stopped. The sound of sobbing from the other side made my heart ache. Instead I turned the handle gently and slowly.

"Jace?" I called out calmly. "Go away." He told me bluntly. His voice was scratchy as if he had been screaming and crying for hours. I walked over cautiously to where he was lying on his bed.

"Jace? Jace look at me." I told him. I grabbed his wrists and he flinched away. I released them immediately. "So-sorry." He mumbled while turning away. "Shh. Shh. Its ok. Don't apologize." I said gently. He buried himself farther into the covers. I sighed sadly and made my way next to him. He flinched even more.

"What can I do?" I asked him in a worried tone. He mumbled some more at me and moved farther away. I moved closer.

"Go 'way." He said to me again. I sighed. "You know I cant do that Jace." I explained to him. "He was right. He was always right." He mumbled over and over again. I sighed again and pushed myself against him as much as I could.

I wrapped my hands around him and put my head on his shoulders. He didn't flinch away this time which was good. I could hear his small sobs and mumbling come to a stop, and then I realized he had fallen asleep. I smiled at him. He looked peaceful. I knew he needed it.

I closed my eyes and fell asleep to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

***

When I woke up the next morning the bed was cold. I figured Jace must have gotten up hours before. I sighed as the pasts memories came flooding back to my head.

I got up out of the bed and began to make my way downstairs to the kitchen. Before I even walked down the stairs, I could smell something heavenly. I followed the smell the smell all the way to kitchen.

"Apparently Izzy's not cooking." I said while walking through the door. Jace gave a small reserved chuckled and Izzy had just walked through the door.

"Why do you say?" She asked accusingly. I turned to her and wrapped an arm around her. She looked up at me while waiting for an answer. "Because it actually smells good in here." I said with a smile. "Ow!" I yelled when Isabelle shoved her elbow into my rib. She laughed and walked over to Jace to give him a hug. I was watching him carefully and I noticed him tense up when Izzy put her arms around him.

All was quiet except the occasional pop of oil in the pan. "So what's for breakfast?" I asked after a while. He didnt move his head, but he shifted his body and showed me the pan.

We stayed in silence once again for all of breakfast. After the dishes were cleaned, I watched Jace begin to walk away. I ran up to him. "Jace." I said. He walked faster.

"Jace can we talk?" I asked while picking up my pace. "I'm busy Alec." He said without turning around. "With what?!?" I shouted at him while grabbing his arm and pulling him to a stop. He whirled around and faced me. "Just leave me alone Alec!" He yelled in my face.

"Why? So you can suffer by yourself? I'm your parabatai Jace. I know what you're going through." I yelled back. "No you don't Alec! You have no idea what I'm going through! Just back off!" He screamed. He turned around but I grabbed his arm and turned him towards me again.

"I SAID BACK OFF!" He screamed even louder. Suddenly I felt a jolt of pain on my face and then by both my ribs. I fell to the ground. It took me a moment to realize what had happened.

"Jace?" I whispered with pain in my voice. He was looking at his hands in complete shock. When his eyes finally met mine, they looked heartbroken. "A-al-c." He tried to say, but he couldnt. Instead he turned and practically ran away.

I stood up painfully and applied a healing rune to my skin. I immediately felt relief.

I walked up the stairs and made my way down the hallway. I walked to the door and opened it. I made my way over to the bed and sat down.

"You have every reason to hate me." Jace said with pain in his voice. I shook my head at him. "I could never hate you Jace." I told him. "You should." He said shortly. "Look at me." I said. He refused to. I placed his hands in mine. "Look at me." I said as gently as possible. He finally did.

"I am here for you Jace. What happened to you.... it was.... it was something I wish I could take away from you. Clary told us what dreams and memories of her father she has had in the past. I know it brought up memories for you too." I watched a few tears slip down his face. I used my hand wiped them away.

"I'm here for you. Wherever, whenever. All you have to do is ask and Ill be there. I'm always here." I told him. He gave me a small smile and nodded. "Thank you Alec." He said to me.

I smiled and pulled him close to me. He buried his head into my shoulder and I felt his tears seep through my shirt, but I didnt care. "I'm right here." I repeated to him.

After a few minutes we pulled apart. I heard Jace inhale deeply.

"Would you tell Clary to come up here?" He asked me. I gave another sympathetic smile. "Of course." I told him. I left him to get Clary.