My throat lumped and dry. My lips cracked, begging to replace the water lost through my crying. My back of my hands had drawn blood from where I had clawed at them attempting to ease the frustration of the situation.

I pulled the covers off my bed and made my way to the kitchen, I peeked in the freezer, searching for some ice cream. I pulled out the only container inside. It felt too light.

I pulled the lid of and sighed at the lack of emotional support inside the container. Pulling out my phone I began to message Hayley to bring some ice cream on her way home. Until I realise she wasn't going to be home until late. With a sigh I messaged Max, hoping he was home or could pick up some on his way to his.

Do you happen to have any ice cream in your freezer I can borrow. I'll buy you a new one to replace it.

Yup I'll bring it over now.

Thank you.

It isn't long before my doorbell rings and I make my way to the door, pulling it open carefully.

"Ice cream for Lacey Carter?" He asks, holding up a practically brand new container.

"Thanks." I say with a small smile. Taking it as he hands it to me.

"How did the talk go?" Max asks me as I let him in, making my way towards the kitchen. He shouldn't be here. I should ask him to leave. Make him understand he shouldn't be here. What if Seth comes over, things are going to blow up. Why can't he see I don't like Max like that.

"Not good." I say letting out a long sigh, not listening to the part of me I know I should be. Pulling open the ice cream container. I immediately delve into it.

"Not good?" Max presses, asking for some more information.

"It's so hard. I just want him to know I love him and only him. And I mean I guess I can't change that he's insecure but he's just being such a dick about it. Like he's just being so petty and I don't understand it." I rant out, letting my frustration load out. Lacey shut up. Stop inviting Max inside your brain.

"Like it's not even like you and I are in any way romantically involved. He just has it in his head. And like I know you shouldn't be over now. But then again, I should be able to have my friends over when I choose and he should be able to trust me. Like what does that say about me if he doesn't trust me? What did I do to make him not trust me. Or what put that seedling of doubt into his mind?" I continue, scooping ice cream into my mouth occasionally.

"It's me he's jealous of?" Max exclaims. Standing up from the chair he was perched on.

"Yeah. It is." I answer, cringing at the tension that could be brought about. Max thinks to himself for a second.

"I'll talk to him." He states making his way to wastes the door. I rush to the door, leaning my body against it so he can't get out.

"No way. Not happening. It's just going to make the situation worse. If your not aware of it then it looks like we're not even hiding anything or discussing the fact Seth and I are fighting about it." I reason, as Max stands in front of me.

"Okay... okay you're right." Max says moving away from the door, back into the kitchen.

I scoop a large amount of ice cream onto the spoon, eating it carefully.

"I'm going to make blueberry pancakes." I announce, turning towards the cupboards and rummaging through them for the ingredients. Seth's favourite.

"Do you have blueberries?" Max asks. I stop, my hands wrapped around a flour container. I let it go and pull open the fridge, in search of some blueberries.

There are none.

I close the fridge and lean against it, sliding to the ground wrapping my arms around my knees. Letting my head flop back against the fridge.

"I just want Seth." I say as tears pool in my eyes, threatening to spill over my eyelashes.

"Hey hey.. it's okay. It'll get better and work itself all out. You just gotta be patient with him okay." Max says and he crouched in front of me holding out his arms. "What time is Hayley going to be here?" He asks me softly.

"She said late." I reply with a shrug, pulling the blanket around me. Sitting down onto the couch, Max plops down next to me.

"Ok. Is it okay if I stay until she gets here? That way if you need a hug or anything at all I'll be one word away." Max offers standing politely.

"Yeah" I say nodding. He bites his lip thoughtfully, his mind drifting before he nods. Carefully lying down besides me and pulling me to him, wrapping his arms around me supportingly.

"He needs to see how much you love him and only him." Max says quietly.

"Yeah." I mumble, barely awake enough to comprehend what he was saying. He keeps talking as I drift further and further into unconsciousness. The feeling of Max's arms being mistaken for Seth's.

***

"What the fuck." I hear a voice snap, pulling me from my sleep. I sit up, rubbing my eyes.

"Seth. Look man it's not-" Max's voice starts.

"Are you kidding me Lacey?" Seth yells as I gain my bearings on the world. Though the pain in Seth's voice is enough to jerk me wide awake.

"Seth, he was comforting me." I defend, meeting his eyes. The eyes that hold so much pain behind them. The pain that threatens to rip my heart to shreds.

"Lacey I'm done with your shitty excuses. I'm done with your cover up stories and all this bullshit. I'm done with you. I'm done." Seth yells. I flinch, as if he's stricken me across the face.

"Don't. Don't do this." I say standing up and moving towards him pleadingly.

"We're done Lacey." Seth says, turning his back to me as he makes his way towards the door.

"No no no. Seth no. Jesus Christ please just understand the story before you go assuming. We're not breaking up because I was being comforted by one of my damn friends." I yell, almost beg. A desperate attempt to salvage him. Keep him in my life.

"Yeah well I was once your friend comforting you Lace. I was once comforting you." He says, the second sentence trailing off, I can hear the pain in his voice. I can feel it. Our eyes meet, burning in passion, desperation and pain. Mine full of tears. His angry, pained, a hint of tears threatening to build.

"We're not done." I say shaking my head, letting the tears fall down my face.

"Yes. We are." Seth mutters, turning and making his way out the door. I walk after him. Frustration and pain overcoming me.

"Seth. Please. Please. Don't do this." I cry after him, watching him retreat down the hall. A hand tugs on my wrist and I fling around.

"You should let him calm down. Then you can talk to him." Max suggests. I glower.

"Please leave me alone." I murmur quietly as I make my way back inside my apartment.

"I don't know if that's a good idea." Max trails off. I narrow my eyes at him.

"If you want to know. I'm not going to kill myself. That kind of shit would ruin Seth." I snap at him, wiping the constant stream of tears from my face.

"I know-" Max starts before I cut him off.

"Go." I say before closing the door behind me and sinking to the floor.

"Lacey.. sweetheart." Hayley's voice rings out as she reaches out to pull me up. I shake my head and bat her hands away.

"You need to get into bed, eat some ice cream. Have a good cry?" Hayley tells me. Cooing and encouraging me up. I push myself off the floor and head into the bathroom, turning on the shower and getting into it, clothes on and all.

Hayley watches this unfold following me, mothering me.

"Leave me alone Hayley." I choke out as the water floods over my body. My clothes sticking to my skin.

"I'm here to support you it's okay." She says softly.

"I don't need support. I need space." I snap. Hayley nods slowly and makes her way out of the bathroom, closing the door most of the way shut.

That's when I let it out. Muffling my tears by putting my hands in my mouth.

I just lost the best thing in my life. And I probably wasn't going to be able to get it back.

I probably wasn't going to get him back.

He's done. For good. He's done.

He's done.

The boy who saw the light in me when I thought it was impossible. The boy who gave me will and motivation to get out of bed in the mornings. The boy who made me want to put my seatbelt on. The boy who made all the stinging showers become less frequent. The boy who pushed me to be the best me I wanted to be. The boy who taught me how to love. The boy who showed me true love.

And he's done with me.