"Ok call me as much as you can. I'll see you in a week." My dad says hugging me tightly.

"See you dad love you. Say bye to Molly for me." I say with a grin as I climb into the back of the car. Luke and Bea are in the front. Seth is squashed between Callie and I.

I close the door behind me as Luke pulls out of the driveway.

"How longs the drive?" Bea asks turning back to ask Callie.

"2 hours." Callie says pulling out a bag of Cheetos.

"Oh my god you brought Cheetos?!" Luke exclaims excitedly. Callie chuckles and hands them to Bea who opens them and hands some to Luke.

"Would you like some Cheetos?" Bea offers Seth and I. I shake my head and Seth does too. Bea nods and returns them back to Callie, not before giving Luke another handful.

I put my AirPods into my ear, press play on my music and curl up in my seat. Closing my eyes as the car bumps beneath me.

I feel Seth lace his fingers through mine and keeping my eyes closed I smile softly. One of the AirPods are removed from my ears and I peek open one eye to see Seth pulling a face as he puts one of my AirPods into his ear. I just chuckle and shake my head.

"This music is so sad." Seth says pulling a face.

"It's not. It's meaningful." I say shaking my head closing my eyes again. Seths finger runs back and forth along the back of my hand.

Bea and Luke sing obnoxiously to some music at the front laughing and Callie has her nose buried in a book. And that's how it remains for the two hours.

***

"The boys house is a block over right?" Bea asks me as we stuff our clothing into the wardrobe her Callie and I were sharing for the weekend.

"Yep. It's easily within walking distance." Callie says with a nod as she pulls out her makeup bag.

"This place is gorgeous." I say peering out the large double glass door sliders. It's a very typical bach that leads right onto the beach.

Our room was quite large, two double beds were carefully positioned at one end of the room, then closer to the doors there was a little coffee table seating area. All decorated in soft blue's and yellows. Other girls had asked for the top level rooms but Bea Callie and I had settled for this room which lead straight onto the golden sand beach.

"What time are the boys coming over?" I ask as I pull out my special bikini staring at it and considering it before shaking my head and swapping it for a plain forrest green bikini.

"Whenever they're done unpacking they said." Bea says with a shrug, tying her hair into a messy bun throwing on her oversized shades. She had pulled on her neon pink bikini and a white coverup.

"Ok hurry up I want to go for a swim." Callie nags me. I hold my hands up in surrender before I head into the bathroom to change. As I return Bea and Callie are sitting on the beds waiting patiently.

I grab a towel before following them out the door onto the beach.

"Are you swimming?" Bea asks me as we lay down our towels.

"We're at the beach? Of course I'm going to swim." I say with a chuckle as I begin to head towards the water. Callie in tow.

"I'm going to tan first." Bea says nodding towards her towel.

"Okay see you in a bit." I call as Callie and I get further away.

"So what is happening with you and Seth?!" Callie asks excitedly as soon as we are out of earshot from Bea.

"Well. I don't really know what's going on between us. We're dating I guess? But then we act like we're together. I have no idea." I say trying to form an explanation.

"And Bea's okay with it?" Callie asks me confused.

"I don't know what happened. But she kind of accepted it I think. She just doesn't want us to rush things. Which is fair enough." I explain as we reach the water.

"So you two are together finally?" Callie asks jumping up and down excitedly.

"Well I don't know. We're dating. I'm not sure what that means exactly for us. But yeah." I say treading deeper and deeper into the sea.

"What do you mean you don't know? You two literally are in love with each other." Callie says shaking her head in confusion.

"Well I don't know. It's all so confusing. My minds saying one thing, my hearts saying another, my anxiety is doubting everything." I say letting out an exasperated sigh. The frustration of the confusion I had been facing escaping me.

"Do you like him?" Callie asks me as we stop, when the water reaches our shoulders.

"I mean yeah of course I like him. I've known him forever." I say with a duh face.

"Ok I'm asking the wrong question here. Would it kill you to see him with someone else?" She asks me. My eyebrows shoot up. I think about Seth with Mia and instantly I feel disappointment and anger flood me.

"It definitely doesn't sit right with me." I say letting out a deep breath.

"Well if you want my opinion. You two are endgame. It's obvious. To everyone. Like I'm not sure how you two don't see it. That sort of love is so rare. And here you two are. Completely oblivious to how in love with each other you are." Callie says seriously. I mull over her words carefully.

"Hey ladies." A male voice calls startling us. I turn and see Carlos and Malcom.

"Hey guys. Long time no see." I say with a chuckle as they swim over to us.

"Ha ha. How are you lovely ladies?" Carlos asks looking between us.

"Good." I say with a nod looking to Callie.

"Yeah I'm good." She replies. "How about you two?" Callie continues politely.

"Yeah also good." Carlos says. Malcom nods.

"Want to join us for a game of volleyball?" Carlos offers nodding towards a volleyball net being set up.

"Yeah sure." I say with a nod. A bit of beach volleyball never went amiss. We paddle towards the shore, then up the beach.

"Hey Lacey, Callie. I see Carlos and Malcom got a few new recruits." Devin says with a chuckle.

"That they did." I say with a grin. We get split into teams and unfortunately I get the pleasure of being in a team with Tommy, I also have Carlos on my team. While Callie, Devin and Cory are on the other team.

We pike the ball as we volley it back and forth. Our team wins a few sets.

"Ok last serve." Callie calls. I nod my head.

"Yeah this is tiring stuff." I say with a chuckle bending over, my hands on my knees to catch my breath before standing up again.

Carlos serves it to the other side. Callie volleys it up as Devin carries it over the net. Tommy volleys it up and Carlos just volley's it. I take the opportunity and smack the ball over the net at the ground where it hits the ground.

"Yes Lacey." Carlos says with a grin double high fiving me.

"Good job guys." I say with a small nod to the others. Callie ducks under the net and wraps her arm around my shoulder.

"We'll see you guys later." She says waving to the boys as we head back towards the towels.

I spot the other boys lying down chatting to Bea, I instantly search for Seth and find him, dark shades cast over his eyes, looking in my direction. I wave to see if he's looking but his head shifts slightly to face Luke.

Weird.

"Hey guys." I say grinning, flopping onto my towel next to where Callie and Seth's towel has been placed.

"Hey sweets." Dallas says cooly.

"Hey Lacey." Luke says with a grin.

"Hey." Bea says pleasantly.

I turn to face Seth who's attention is not on me and is instead looking out at the ocean.

"Hi princess." I say with a grin. He turns to me and raises his eyebrows at me.

"Hi." He says curtly before turning his attention away from me. I turn to Callie who's confused expression matches my own.

I sink onto my towel, resting my head on my hands as I study Seth with confusion. His jaw is locked and tense, his shoulders too.

I sigh gently before turning back to Callie. The late afternoon sun warms my back I sink into my towel closing my eyes, the chatter around me becoming white noise.

"Let's go get changed for the bonfire." Callie says shaking my shoulder not long later. I open my eyes to find Seth, Luke and Bea gone. I nod and stand up, folding up my towel and following Callie towards the house.

"What's up with Seth?" Callie asks me as she digs through the wardrobe.

"I'd like to know that myself." I say zoning out thoughtfully.

I pull out my phone and call him. No answer. I type out a message and send it.

Hey is everything okay?

I chuck my phone across the room onto my bed before pulling out some denim shorts and a simple lavender tank top. I brush my hair and dutch braid it. I pull out my shades and place them on top of my head.

Callie is dressed in a cute sundress her hair in a curly ponytail.

"Where's Bea?" I ask her.

"She went with Seth and Luke to pick up some firewood materials." Callie says looking up from her phone.

"Ahh." I say with a small nod. I head out of the room into the kitchen, not before grabbing my phone and slipping it into my jean shorts pocket.. I pull open the stocked up fridge and tug out some pasta that I had brought for a snack in the car ride that I didn't end up eating. I scoop it into a bowl and microwave it.

I swing myself onto a barstool and blow on the steaming pasta before biting into it.

I pull out my phone from my pocket. No reply. I sigh and place it on the table. I look outside towards the beach.

I see a few guys building up some wood and dragging a few logs around it. I spot Bea and make my way down. Bringing my pasta with me.

"Hey Bea." I say moving besides her.

"Hey girlie." She says with a grin. "ooh." she says pointing to the pasta in my hand. I nod and hand her my fork. She takes a small bite before handing it back to me.

"Have you seen Seth?" I ask her.

"Yeah he's just grabbing some last bits of wood from the back of Oscar's truck." She says with a nod. "Here he is now." She says pointing towards an incoming figure. My head snaps towards him as he nears. His sunglasses are gone and he's got a hoodie on over some shorts. He drops the wood onto the pile before dusting himself on, not looking at me.

I nibble at my lip anxiously as he begins to talk to Oscar.

Should I pull him aside to ask him what's wrong? Do you think he knows I'm here? Is he mad at me? Maybe he's upset? What if he doesn't actually like you and is trying to distance himself from you?

Questions thunder through my mind as my anxious brain overworks itself.

"Seth." I say suddenly my feet moving towards him. He turns to me his eyebrows raised.

"Yes?" He asks me curtly. Oscar looks at me curiously.

"Can we talk for a quick second?" I say nodding towards the empty shrug.

"Why don't you go talk to your best friend Carlos or maybe even Tommy?" He says sourly.

"Why would I do that?" I ask him my eyebrows drawing up in confusion. My heart panging at his coldness.

"That's a real good question Lacey. Care to fill me in on that one too?" He asks tensely. Oscar moves away noting the tension between Seth and I. I flinch, Seth calling me by my actual name felt like a slap to the face.

"Look just come for a walk with me so we can sort whatever is going on without making a scene." I plead. Seth draws his lips into a line and nods. We begin walking down the beach in silence.

"What's going on?" I ask him as our footsteps crunch on through the sand.

"Don't act so innocent. Your literally dangling your ex and your ex friends with benefits infront of me. Do I not exist to you?" he says angrily.

"What do you mean dangling them in front of you? Wait you mean me playing volleyball with them?" I ask him in shock. His eyes narrow as he nods tensely.

"Oh my god. Are you serious? I'm not allowed to talk to boys? Is that your issue? I played volley ball with them. I didn't kiss or hug or even slightly romantically touch any of them. And by the way it's not like that should even matter because what are we? We're dating but what the fuck does that even mean? We act like a couple, we kiss like a couple, we talk like a couple. But we're not a couple? I don't even know how you feel about me or what you want for me?" I rant anger and frustration of the last few days surging through me.

"No your allowed to talk to guys that's not what I'm saying. But you were clearly flirting with them, throwing your ass around. You had them wrapped around your fucking finger and you knew it." He snaps stopping from walking.

"Are you serious right now? I was playing a simple game of Volleyball I honestly don't give a fuck about what Carlos and Tommy or any other guy for that matter think about me nor am I trying to have them wrapped around my finger. Don't you think if I wanted them I would have them? If I still wanted to be with Tommy, who by the way strangled me, then I would. If I wanted to be with Carlos who was merely an emotional outlet for me, who I am still friends with then I would have taken him up on his date offer wouldn't I have?" I yell angrily. Seth looks down at his shoes and shuffles his feet.

"You know it actually hurts. That you think so little of me. That I would throw myself around like that. One of the guys being one who strangled me. Strangled me." I say my voice breaking tears pricking my eyes. I start moving past Seth towards the house.

"Lace wait." Seth says grabbing my arm gently. I tug my arm out of his grip and walk up to the house. I get inside and push past a few girls who give me apologetic glances. I close the bathroom door behind me locking it. I fall against it and sob.

After a while I wipe my eyes pulling myself together. I splash cold water over my face to calm down my red eyes, before slipping out of the bathroom. I enter the kitchen and see Seth speaking angrily to a girl who is replying back angrily.

He looks up and spots me, moving towards me. I shake my head at him.

"Lace please just listen." He says walking after me as I make my way towards the bonfire.

"No Seth it's okay I got the message thanks." I snap.

"Lace stop." He pleads.

"Leave. Me alone. For tonight please." I say stopping and turning towards him taking a deep breath.

"I don't think of you like that. I just." He says quickly. I hold my hand up to stop him.

"Just please." I say taking a deep breath. Seth nods. I turn on my heel and continue towards the bonfire. I spot Callie and Dallas chatting on a log and I slide onto the log next to them.

"Hey sweets." Callie says pleasantly.

"Heya." Dallas says smiling at me.

"Hey guys." I say putting as much effort into a smile.

"What happened with Seth?" Callie asks me.

"I don't want to talk about it." I say shaking my head. Callie wraps an arm around me and leans against me apologetically. I give a small smile and hug her.

Seth joins the circle next to Luke and Bea and I do everything in my power not to look at him.

Does he really think that little of me?

"you were clearly flirting with them, throwing your ass around. You had them wrapped around your fucking finger and you knew it."

His voice echoed through my mind.

Callie let's me go and grabs my hand, holding it gently. I wrap my other arm around me. Ignoring the hurt that makes me want to double over and scream.

***

A plan had been made for the boys to sleep over the night. In the lounge. Some boys had picked up some mattresses and the couches had been set up in the living room. Boys in there. Girls in their rooms.

Stupid plan if you ask me but who did?

I had been silent the whole night. Staring into the fire. Focusing on the unsteady flickers. Everyone decided to congregate in the kitchen/dining/living rooms.

I went into my room and threw on a hoodie and my green checked pyjama shorts before getting into bed. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep so I scrolled through tiktok.

There was a light knock at the door. I rolled over and saw Callie peeking her head around. She walked in and closed the door behind her.

"Are you okay?" She asks me as she puts on her pyjamas. I nod softly and let out a soft sigh. She climbs into bed besides me and turns off the light. I roll over as she hugs me. We lie like that for hours. Eventually Bea comes in and joins us, not knowing the reason. After what feels like hours Bea and Callie's breaths both fall even.

I carefully remove myself from in between them, careful not to wake them. I patter down the hallway, through the living room which is full of sleeping boys, and a few girls I noticed curled up with a few of the guys. I continue into the kitchen.

I tug open the fridge and search for a snack.

"I'm making some pancakes if you want some? Cinnamon." A voice says making me jump. I close the fridge door and see Seth standing over the stove flipping a pancake.

How had I not noticed or heard him when I walked in?

"Yes please." I say with a small nod. I grab a glass and pour myself a glass of water before lifting myself up onto the island. Seth scoops a pancake onto a plate and sprinkles chocolate chips over top of it even though I can see chocolate sprinkled through it, before handing it to me. I place it besides me, ripping a small chunk of it and chewing it.

"Why are you awake?" I ask him quietly. Seth winces.

"I think you can figure that one out." He says drawing his lips together.

"I don't think of you like that Lace." Seth says pouring some pancake mix into the pan. "I'm scared." He admits out loud. My head snaps up.

"I've never felt like this before. And I'm so scared that you don't feel the same way Lace. I make excuses to try ease the disappointment in the likely case that you don't feel the same way. I just I'm scared Lace. I'm sorry." Seth says his voice cracking slightly. I swing myself off the bench and step towards him. I reach my hands up to caress his face gently. I look into his eyes, his tears threatening to fall.

"I'm scared too." I admit, brushing the tears from his cheeks. "I had all these rules to avoid falling for someone, because in the end I thought I wouldn't live until 18. I wanted to limit my interactions, stop forming connections, less collateral damage. But with you it just happened. I found myself wrapped up in the thought of you and I can't stop. You understand my struggles and you know nearly everything about me, but you still treat me like normal and it's not weird. I wake up in the mornings and I'm excited to see you or I'm excited to leave the house, where that excitement wasn't there before you." I start rambling before I stop, realising what I'm admitting.

"Your my excitement to start the day too. I go to sleep wanting to be with you, I wake up wanting to go see you. It's always you, whenever anything happens I need to go to you. It's like your the peace in my chaotic mind and with you I can breathe and I know that sounds ridiculously cliche but it's true. Lace I love you. And I can't kid myself that I don't. I am so in love with you." He says, his eyes widening at the realisation of what he is saying.

"I am so incredibly fucking in love with you too." I whisper. The tears from Seth's eyes fall a grin stretching across his face.

Our lips collide, passion surging through us. Seth's hand grips my waist as I tiptoe to kiss him. Emotions pass between us, a knew identified meaning. We pull apart, resting out foreheads against each other.

"Will you officially be my girlfriend?" Seth asks me. I smile and nod. He grins and kisses me again.

A burning smell causes us to pull apart once again.