Author's Note

Okay, I know. So Part 5 was probably the most explicit yet. I hope I haven't offended anyone's sensibilities.

I have to admit that I kind of went out of my way to make this part pretty graphic. Even this censored version goes pretty far. If my dad ever saw what I've written now, I'd really be in trouble. Seriously. I think he'd probably disown me or something and never speak to me again. He'd be so upset. Which, I think, is why I wrote it like that. When I was writing the graphic scenes, I kept thinking about how disappointed in me he would be, and this just made me describe the details even more explicitly. I wanted him to read it. I wanted to see his reaction. I'm not so dumb as to actually let him see any of this, but sometimes I feel like it's the only way I could ever get back at him.

I guess you're wondering what I mean by "get back at him." Well . . .

The thing is, I sneaked out again with Kyle. And this time my dad caught me. I'm so stupid. I should have known he would catch me. Kyle and I didn't even really do anything but go for a quick drive and mess around a little. Nothing like last time. He had to be back before his parents got home from some event or something, so I was only gone for about a half hour.

But when I climbed back through the window, my dad was actually sitting in my room. I almost had a heart attack. He even helped pull me back inside so I wouldn't hurt myself. It was so embarrassing.

He basically grounded me "indefinitely" from everything but homework. He took my phone away. At least he didn't turn the internet off this time. But he actually put a block on my window so it can only open like three inches. I don't know if that's even legal. He said he didn't want me to hurt myself.

But I don't know when I'll be able to see Kyle again. Maybe never. I haven't even told him what happened yet. I'm trying to figure out how to say it in an email. He's probably tried to text me, and he's probably wondering why I haven't texted him back. I think I might be putting off writing to him because when I do I'll have to face up to the fact that I won't be able to see him anymore, ever, and I'll have to stop pretending that I will. And I'll have to tell him all of that.

I have to stop thinking so much about Kyle. I'm just going to write stories. Write, write, write. Sometimes I feel like it's the only thing I've got.

xxBailey

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