You father was coming home tomorrow. You've spent the weekdays and the weekends waiting for him. You needed to tell him about mother.

You haven't been in her room for a while. You were scared to walk in there. She didn't call for you at all since she had yelled at you. Cayden told you that he would take care of her for you, bringing her food and water.

You spent the evening wandering the house like you did on... the day your mother yelled at you.

Once again, you've found yourself attracted to your father's room. You were walking through the dark halls, heading to his room when you smelt this horrible smell. It was rancid.

The smell was at it strongest right in front of your mother's room. You couldn't go in there anymore. You didn't know how you've never noticed that smell.

You turned around, heading towards Cayden's room. You knocked on his door and waited.

Cayden opened the door, frowning. He had expensive headphones on, keeping one ear uncovered.

"What?"

"Can you check on mother for me?" You ask quietly.

He gave you an annoyed look.

"Yeah sure." He grumbles, exiting his room.

As you both walk closer to your mother's room, you notice his face scrunch up in what looked like disgust. The smell had hit him. He stopped at your mother's room, holding his hand over his mouth and nose.

"What the fuck is that?" He mumbles, coughing a bit.

He knocks loudly on the door. He was angry... you could tell.

"Yo, what the fuck is that smell!? You know you have to take baths right?!" He says, twisting the door knob.

The smell was even worse once he opened the door. The room was dark and you couldn't see much, but you could tell it was a mess in there. There was a single stack of uneaten food, and it was rotting. Your big brother must've been too lazy to clean up for your mother. Cayden walks into the room, leaving you in the hallway.

"Are you even listening to me?" Cayden growls, stomping towards the bed.

The room was a bit hot since the window had been open all week. There was nothing but hot air outside since it was the summer time. That must have made the food rot quicker. To add to that, a few flies must have flown in from the window.

Cayden nudges your mother, getting angrier and angrier.

"Hey! Listen to me!!"

He was pissed. You didn't like that he was getting so mad at your mother, but you refused to step in that room. You wouldn't walk in there unless your mother asked you.

Cayden was done with your mother's silent game. He didn't like that she was ignoring him. She had neglected him his whole life. Ever since you were born, he has been nothing but background noise to her, but not now. She needed him now because she was sick and he was going to let her know that. Cayden grips the blanket that was over your mother's body, ripping it off. Underneath was—

"W—what." Cayden stutters. "Oh god...." He groans, turning away. He sounded weird.

He threw up.

"What's wrong?" You say, hesitating before taking a step inside the room.

You walk closer to Cayden. He puts his hand out, telling you to stop.

"(Y/n)... don't." He says, his eyes wide. Somehow, in the dark room, you could see the change in his complexion. He looked pale... like he has see a ghost. "Don't... come any closer."

You didn't listen, but should have. You should have listened.

What you saw was mother. Her night gown had.... unsightly stains near the crotch area and of her skin was discolored. Her hair was dry and her lips were extremely chapped. She didn't look right and you knew why, but you refused to think that it was true. All the signs were showing, but you were in denial. No... she was fine.

"Momma?" You say softly, scared that she would yell at you if she woke up.

In her hand was a pregnancy test and right beside he was a empty pill bottle. Those were the pills that you left for her. Last time you checked, the bottle was nearly full. That was about three months worth the medication.

"Momma??" You say again. Was she ignoring you... was she sleeping? No, no she wasn't. You knew she wasn't.

You knew she wasn't just sleeping.

"Momma?!" You yell, shaking her. You didn't care that she shit herself, you didn't care that the bed was covered in her waste. She needed to get up. "Why are you so cold?! Momma?!"

She had to.

"M—Momma?!" You say, your voice cracking.

Your brother had never heard you make such a noise. It horrified him. He wanted to see you cry all his life... he didn't want his father to think that you were tougher than him and now... he finally got what he wanted... well that's what he thought. Even thought there were no tears physically going down your face, he could feel your pain. He didn't like it... he didn't like it at all.

To see someone as emotionally strong as you break, even if it was just a little bit, hit him right in the heart. You were his little sister... he was supposed to protect you from these sorts of things. He failed you.

You brother grabs you by the wrist, harshly tugging you out of the room. He slams your mother's bedroom door shut, leaning against it.

"(Y/n)..." your brother says, holding onto your wrist. "I..."

"This is all some type of joke right? I never did get jokes..." You say.

"(Y/n)..." Cayden says softly. This was the first time he's ever looked at you in such a way. It was caring.... kind. Why was he staring at you like that?

"That's just a well made prop right? Where is mother really?" You ask, looking up at your big brother with your innocent and hopeful eyes. He could hear the slight panic in your voice.

It stung... it was painful to look at you. He didn't know what to do. His mother... was dead and even thought he wasn't close to her... he knew that you were. He didn't like you sometimes, but he would never use something like this against you. He wasn't that low. He felt sick.

He hugged you. He didn't know what else to do and that was all he could think of. He was warm, just like mother. No... now, he was warmer than her. Everyone was.

You broke. Your shoulder started to shake, your legs became weak, your eyes burned, and your heart crumbled into a million pieces. All your brother could do was comfort you. Never, in his life, did he ever think he would hug you, but it made him realize things. Your mother didn't show him much love because you needed it more.

Everyone around you hated you since you were born and mother was all you had. You had no one now... no one to love you... except him and father.

"M—mom..." You sobbed.

"Shhhh." Cayden hushes you, running his hand through you hair. He was crying too. He was crying with you. "It's going to be alright..."

"No.... she... hates.... me....."

He barely knew his mother, it's not like her death really impacted him as much as it did you, but... you never cried in front of him before. All through your childhood, even though he was a bit of a bully towards you, you two still talked... and he loved you like a sibling should. He just didn't like to admit it.

You gripped Cayden's shirt, sobbing loudly. If it weren't for Cayden, you would have fallen to the ground. You would have curled into a sad and pathetic ball and you would have weeped for days. You knew she was going to die one day... you knew she was, but... no...

You're not stupid, you were just in denial. It's clear that she killed herself. She left you on purpose and that made her death even more painful.

She. Left. You.

"I know she doesn't." Cayden mumbles. "She could never... hate you. She loved you way too much."

You don't respond, gripping his shirt even tighter.

Seeing those tears run down your cheeks, hearing you cry.... made Cayden hate himself even more than he already did.

(Time skip)

Your mother's family had long given up on your mother. When your mother had you, her family abandoned her. They hated her and they hated you. The residents that lived in your town as long as your parents did were the only people invited to the funeral since your mother's family and your father's family said they weren't going to show up. Your father had prepared the funeral and the memorial all on his own.

It was open casket.

You were inside the church for the first few minutes of the memorial. The casket looked comfortable. She was rest on red, cushioned velvet and she was surrounded by white roses. She would have hated it. She would have wanted the things in her casket to be happy and girly because she liked those sorts of things.

After a while, you couldn't bare to look at her. She did not look like she was sleeping... she looked dead. She was dead. Your father didn't cry, the people around him didn't cry. Your brother looked upset, but you didn't think he was sad for your mother. He was looking at you the whole time.

After the first twenty minutes, you stood outside the church the for the rest of the memorial. You couldn't be in there. Everyone was gossiping about her. Some at least tried to pretend that they cared, but most did nothing but talk about all the mistakes she's made in the past. The wives that made fun of her, the business men that thought she was an easy catch, the children, that were now teens, that would always ruin your picnics... they were all in there and they did nothing, but talk about things that your mother hated most.

You felt more more empty than ever... you didn't think that was possible, but it was true. You had... nothing to live for. The woman, who was your everything, has left you all alone... or maybe... you were the one that left her. All you had was a note.... a suicide note. Your father had given it to you yesterday.

Your eyes began to water. Your face remained straight, but your eyes were overflowing with tears.

She left you.

She set you free.

You could now do anything. You didn't have to worry about your mother anymore. You could move in with Thomas, you could break any rule you wanted...your mother couldn't hold you back anymore. That's what some people would say anyway, but you wouldn't do any of that. You couldn't... you had no will.

You didn't mind that your mother was what effected your decisions.

To add to the atmosphere, it started to rain. The clouds were extremely dark. Those were definitely storm clouds. Even if it did start to storm, you would still stay outside. Hopefully, you would be struck by lightning. Then maybe... you could follow your mother into the afterlife.

(Time skip)

People were eating food from a buffet that the church had set up. Your brother had came put to check on you, asking you if you wanted to come in and eat, but you declined. Out of the kindness in his heart, kindness you didn't know he possessed, he gave you his suit jacket. To keep warm in such nasty weather.

The memorial was still going on... kinda. Your father had organized an after party and everything. Tomorrow would be the burial. You thought that was insensitive, but then again... some people just did that. You guessed it was to "lighten the mood", but no one was actually sad in that funeral.

You were done. You left the church, walking to the park.