Levi sat on a park bench eating his egg sandwich and listening to his police scanner. It had been a quiet day, but he knew that at any moment a call would go out and it would be his time to shine.

A girl walked by and pinched her nose shut. “Pee ew, what stinks?”

He smiled. Not because he had just farted, which he had, but because one day when they asked what stinks there would be hope in their hearts that it would be him, and there would be smiles on their faces not the glares and not the scowls that he normally got.

His police scanner chose that exact moment to go off. Bank robbery in progress on the corner of Lexington and Lois Lane. He jumped to his feet, his brown spandex glistening in the sunlight as his cape flowed behind him. He shoved the rest of his sandwich in his mouth and mumbled, “Duty calls, citizens.” before hurriedly grabbing his lunch box and radio and blasting off into the sky.

The people in the park who had been standing around watching this spectacle suddenly found themselves drowning in butt propellant. Some gagged, others threw up. A few passed out at the lack of oxygen. Luckily, not a single person struck a match.

While he was flying over the city, he tried to remember exactly where Lexington and Lois lane was. He was pretty sure it was over by the Chuck E. Cheese on Fifth Ave that he kept getting kicked out of. Sure he was technically too tall to go into the ball pit, according to the sign. But that didn’t mean he didn’t fit, which he had proven on more than one occasion. The last time they had kicked him out, they had told him to never come back. He could hear cop sirens below him. He looked down and saw multiple cop cars racing to what he could only presume was the location of the robbery.

That was enough for him to get his bearings. He looked in the bank’s direction. Traffic was grid locked. The police would never get there in time.

A blue blur shot down the street, weaving in between cars and through traffic. Levi knew what it was at first glance. It was a superhero that went by the name of Blue Streak. He was a speed runner that could run at the speed of sound. He was also a jerk. It looked like Levi wouldn’t be the only superhero at the bank today. He gave it more gas, arriving at the bank just shortly after the Streak. He descended to the ground on a cushion of wind. Blue Streak stood on the ground looking up at him with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. But he wasn’t alone. Another hero stood beside him that Levi had the misfortune of meeting previously. It was Jacque the Jock. He was a strong man that specialized in sport themed weaponry. Today he was dressed in football pads and wearing a baseball bat across his shoulders and behind his neck. There was someone else, too. A girl dressed in spandex with light brown hair. He hadn’t met her before and by the look of her generic purple unitard and oversized belt, she was new to the hero scene.

“Go home Stench, we got this,” Blue Streak shouted at him.

“It’s tailwind, and if you’ve got this then why isn’t it already taken care of?” Levi asked, his feet making contact with the ground.

“I’m recharging.”

“Oh god, what’s that smell?” the new girl asked.

“That would be Stench,” Jacque said in his fake French accent, motioning towards Levi.

The new girl gave him a little wave of recognition.

“Don’t listen to them, My name is Tailwind. Nice to meet you.”

“Hi. I’m still working on a name.Not really sure yet, but I’m leaning towards Kick Girl.”

“Not bad. I like it.” Levi said.

“The Stench’s super power is flatulence. That’s why it suddenly smells like a truck stop bathroom.”

Levi shrugged. “It’s not that bad. You get used to it after a while.”

“I don’t want to get used to it, I want you to leave,” Jacque said.

“I second,” said the Blue Streak, plugging his nose.

Levi turned to the new girl expectantly, who just shrugged and said, “I don’t care if you stay.

Levi clapped his hand together, “Good, let’s go get these guys.” He looked over at the others, who stood there motionless. “Or girls, we don’t know.” He looked back, they still they didn’t move. “Oh, that’s right, we’re waiting for Streak to recharge. How long does that usually take?”

“I’m almost ready.” Blue Streak said.

The bank door flew open, letting out the ringing of the bank alarm and the masked bandits. Levi looked back over to the others. Blue Streak waved them on. Jacque was already charging into action. The new girl stood there like a deer caught in the headlights. The bandits pulled their guns. These were no kid toys. They were full auto dual action burst shot revolvers and none of the heroes were bullet proof. Jacque looked for cover, but the street was empty. The new girl continued to stand there while Streak stepped in behind her. It was up to the Tailwind to save the day. He let out a low rumble. A fart whose base was so low it shook the ground. The gunman fired wildly as their arms became noodles from the movement. Then their legs gave out, and they toppled to the ground. Two of them lost their guns in the process. Levi launched himself off the ground, spun around, and landed behind the robbers as they scurried to their feet and fought to gain control of their weapons. The Stench stood over them, shaking his finger. They each fell unconscious, one by one.

“Silent but deadly,” he said, more as a quip than to anyone in particular.

A fourth bandit came running out of the building, his gun already raised and poised to shoot kick girl. Levi reacted, letting out a burst of gas that sent the man flying into the brick exterior of the bank and shattering all the windows on the first three floors. He ducked and covered his head as remnants of glass showered down upon him. Luckily, most of the glass was blown inward, not outward. Oh, god. There were probably a lot of people that just got hurt from that blast. He looked around, hoping that someone would tell him that it wasn’t his fault. That he did what he had to do and everything was going to be ok. Only the new girl and Levi remained standing as Jacque had fallen victim to the silent but deadly attack.

“I’m out,” said Blue Streak before bolting to avoid the PR nightmare that was the bank robbery. And then the wind changed direction and the new girl fell unconscious, leaving only him.

Oh crap, what was he going to do? The cops had already warned him about intervening in police matters a couple times and after the last time where he may have or may not have accidentally (and definitely did not want to talk about) pooped on some people. Just a little.

He needed to get out of there. The sirens were close, they would be here any second. He pushed off and propelled himself upward and onward, giving the new girl one last look.