18

Liam woke up when the alarm on his watch rang. He got to his laptop, opened it, and started checking his inbox before he realized he was no longer working at Bureogis. Then he closed his laptop, put on his clothes, and walked to the bathroom to clean himself. The last few days had been out of the ordinary, to say the least, and Liam felt somewhat reminiscent of simpler times when he was just dealing with simple machines all day. But it was not just that which haunted his mind. Late in the night on the previous day, he was with Ristenel in the meeting room. It was just the two of them and it was just some casual talk about philosophy and art. Liam discovered that Ristenel, like himself, has also read many great classics, and seem to share a similar worldview. He felt, that for the first time in his life, he has found a woman who he understood, and who understood him. But as the evening ended, and they were both drunk from Ristenel’s wine collection, Liam started to think about what he did to Aiden.

Ristenel had been kind and smart enough to not reveal that it was Liam who sent the message to CEO Pros suggesting that some officers may not be doing what they should. However, when Liam sent Serp the message, he did not truly understand Aiden’s feelings for Elizabeth. In fact, before meeting Ristenel, Liam himself had never had any serious feelings for any woman. He had always wondered by boys chased girls when he was in school, and what so big about the whole deal. What he did not realize was that his intellect was so far beyond that of any of his peers that it was almost impossible for them to communicate, and that he would have been destined to forever be lonely if it was not for by pure chance that he was able to meet someone with the same level of intelligence. However, having experienced the character of Ristenel has led him to understand, and now he can finally emphasize with his brother. But when he tried to put himself in his brother’s shoes and to imagine what he may feel if Ristenel was arrested, tortured, and killed by Bureogis, Liam could only feel unbearable pain.

In short, Liam was not comfortable with himself. Nonetheless, the day must go on. He went downstairs and fund that Ristenel’s man has already got him all the none lethal weapons that he and Aiden required. He was halfway through inspecting the weapons when Aiden came down.

“You are starting the fun without me, I see,” Aiden said as he walked down the stairs.

Liam greeted his brother and the two of them went through the weapons. Liam looked at his brother and could see that Aiden was pleased with the quality of the weapons, but Liam can also see that something had changed in his brother. Aiden’s eyes didn’t carry the boyish innocence that they once had, and Liam could feel that Elizabeth’s capture has changed Aiden. He tried to convince himself that his actions were justified now that it made his brother more determined, but then realized that nothing could excuse what he has done.

It was then the Ristenel entered the living room, from outside, carrying two grappling hooks. Liam almost forgot about the equipment that they would need to scale the walls and told himself that he needed to be more focused if he and his brother was surviving the ordeal. Aiden tanked Ristenel and brought the grappling hooks to Liam. The brothers looked at the hooks and realized that they were made by Bureogis. They looked at Ristenel, both wondering what type of connection she had to get this equipment, as the grapples were not available on the commercial market. However, Ristenel just smiled, clearly not wanting to talk, and instead invited them to breakfast.

For breakfast, they had sausages, bacon, eggs, and bread, which both Liam and Aiden enjoyed although it was clear in taste that their food was synthetic. After breakfast, Ristenel reminded them that they would be leaving at noon and that it was probably better for Liam and Aiden to finish their final preparations. Ristenel told them that after everything was over if they wanted, the brothers can stay in the house and be part of her team to change the world for the better. That meant that of the little personal belongings they had left, they could leave in their guest bedrooms which can now be their permanent residence. Liam could not find a reason to disagree and saw that Aiden was satisfied as well. Personally, Liam even thought about donating part of his savings to the cause. While his brother was clearly impressed with the progress made in the dark zone, Liam himself had been hiding his amazement in his expressions, but inside, he felt exactly like Aiden.

Later, when Liam and Aiden had finished packing for the mission, the brothers both sat on the doorsteps of the house, watching the bright sun lighting up all of New York in front of them. They were not wearing exo-suites due to the heavy weight of the equipment limiting mobility but instead wore normal combat armor, as Aiden’s old team would be expected to as well. The two men sat there looking like soldiers before a battle, eager yet nervous to a sensible degree.

It had been a long time since the two had a chance to simply talk due to how busy their work had been. Thus they talked for a few hours and could have continued if it was not for the fact that a young woman, who told them that she would be their pilot, arrived outside of the Ristenel residence. They told the pilot to wait outside as they went inside the house, took all the equipment they needed from the living room, told the guards at the door that they were leaving for a mission, and followed the young pilot. They entered a mag-mobile, and after a short journey arrived at a makeshift airfield. The pilot had a small airplane along a line of larger ones, but Liam was gratified with what they have. They entered the airplane with their equipment, and after a short while lifted off.

The flight itself was moderate in length of time, expected to take around seven hours. However, Liam had nothing to do during the flight, except to play chess with Aiden since they found a small chess set at the front of the plane. However, the game soon got boring as Liam beat his brother every single time. Instead, they decided to talk some more. Yet, even the most interesting of conversations could not last seven hours. Eventually, both men opened their respective electronic devices. However, although Liam could see that Aiden was watching some old movies from the 21st century when the economy was strong enough to support large budget films, Liam himself didn’t feel like watching any entertainment. Instead, he returned to his thoughts which he seems to be visiting a lot lately.

Liam knew that if he told Aiden that he messaged Bureogis, it was possible that his brother will never forgive him, not that it mattered. Liam will not ever be able to forgive himself anyways. He reflected on how he always tried to convince himself that his actions were all necessary, to bring about a better world. He thought about his previous chess game with Aiden, where the pawns are given the promise that they could become anything once they reach the end of the line, but are mostly sacrificed along the way. Whatever the pieces are, they are confined in their function from the beginning of the game. Where all pieces, including the powerful queen, are to be sacrificed at appropriate times to protect the king. Liam thought that the game seemed like a terrible naked reflection of reality, stripped down to its barest and ugliest parts.

Is it not true that those born in the dark zone are given the beacon of hope, through religion, or the constant propaganda of the news media that they may become anything as long as they work hard enough? Is it not true that statistically, most will fail? Is also not true, that most born into the light zone received an education that prepared them for but a single purpose? They may be a rook, a knight, a bishop, or perhaps even a queen; they may stand above petty pawns; but in the end, were their paths not as set as those of pawns? Finally, who is it to say that it must be the king who ought to be defended, and not the rook or the knight, but mere conventions of the game?

Chess was a game of logic and efficiency, where each piece was a tool to be used towards a socially constructed definition of victory. Except in the real world, there stands an individual or a group of individuals behind each of the pieces. Each person was to themselves the king, and everyone else, depending on their value, was a different piece. Was it not this world which Liam wanted to do away with. Did he not want a world of relative equality and freedom with equal chance and opportunity, where people are not forced to use each other for their own benefits in the name of competition? Yet, he himself led white in making a Gambit with Elizabeth as the sacrificial pawn; and Serp, as black happily accepted the gambit and now was playing into a trap. But the sacrifice was real, the game of life wasn’t just a game, it is much more, it was also life.

Liam could see that in his relentless pursuit of justice, he has committed grave sins. He now realizes what has been haunting him. First, there was the guilt he felt to his brother after realizing what it feels to love a woman, but it was something more. It was the subconscious realization that in his pursuit to change the system, he slowly became part of it. He used people, he killed people, and it was all in the name of necessity. It was the fact that he continuously tried to justify his action as absolutely right. He now saw that actions may be right and wrong at the same time, for it just depended on the perspective. Different actions, to the different people affected, can be right and wrong at the same time, there are no absolutes, only interpretations.

Some interpretations are obviously better than others, and some perspectives more grounded in reality. But what Liam now saw that while it is true that his actions will benefit many, it will also harm. What was important for him to do ultimately, was simply to respect the humanity in all humans to the greatest possible extent. That meant respecting their perspective, their trust, and their personhood which he failed spectacularly in sending the message to counter-intelligence. He had betrayed his brother’s trust and Elizabeth’s autonomy, that was wrong but necessary for Liam and the people he fought for, and right to Bureogis which Liam fought against. It was necessary to see that the coin always had two sides, even when one only bets on one.

There is no need to justify the action as somehow completely right, because it is not, even though it will partially do right bring benefits to more people in the long term if Liam succeeds his mission. However, that right is not a replacement for the wrong which was done, the action still amounted to injustice. But, it was also necessary to see that the only acceptable injustice, is the one made to prevent greater injustices. That was what Liam had done, and he needs to accept his actions. However, he must never pretend to his conscience that he did right. The actions are merely and barely acceptable, on the fringe of morality, but can never be justified. He must always be reminded that it is the mindset that the end justifies the means which has led to the greatest moral catastrophes in human history and is leading to another one by the thought processes of the TAC IIs.

Liam breathed deeply, feeling comforted that his inner conflict was now partially resolved. Of course, he still had to find a time to talk to Aiden about the message. However, for now, Liam reassured himself that with an unwavering inner philosophy, he would be able to make hard choices again if he had to. Except that he would do it right this time. He looked at his brother who was watching the movie. By recognition of how much he had done Aiden wrong, the possible danger that they were about to go through, and the undeserving trust the Aiden would place on him during the task, he hugged his brother without warning.

Aiden looked like he was taken by surprise as his eyes widened. But he quickly dropped his earphones and tablet and embraced Liam. He didn’t know what his brother was feeling or doing, but he did know that they have been through a lot in the past few days, that his brother was probably nervous before combat, and that he himself could probably do with a little comforting since he was about to face his old team.