《I'm just a mortal》THE REAL PAST
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- you f****** bread shuttle, are you stupid? .. come here
wait wait wait... " should I start from the beginning? "... but I hate to tell this part but..... anyway... I am just an ordinary person with some deference.... my mother from the east of Asia... my father from the middle east .. so I am a bit different... wider shoulders, tanned skin, stronger body and ever taller than the others
But this world is not a fairy tale... my parents broke up when I was five years old... I stayed with my mother... but I still at the religion of my father... because of this event my mother turned to lovers with the alcohol... after that, she didn't concern about me... so I need to work a part-time job in a clothes store after school
My day started at six o'clock in the morning, I made my breakfast while my mother sleeping cause the alcohol... after that, I go to the school.... the first thing that happened to me ins the school... that I get bullied
- you f****** bread shuttle, are you stupid? .. come here
- what do you want?
- you don't greet the three of us, you should apologize now
" What a hand trick " I can not stand and h humiliated and do nothing, my army vs those three armies... maybe I will have a big loss but not the biggest... after that section, I went to the bathroom to organize my appearance before going to the class
- hey Xuan Jian ... you fought again?
she is the only friend that I had in the school, lucky it was a girl .... but why she sticking with me .. I don't know .. maybe because she thin, wearing o glasses ( O--O ) ... maybe because no one wants to become her friend
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- yeah ... thank you for your concern .. Qui Li Yuin
- I said to you ... you can call me Yuin Yuin
Yes ... she is Yuin Yuin that we were engaged in-game world ... the reason that why she changed to this appearance? ... maybe because she didn't have confidence in herself ... why you ask ? .... because the schoolmate, the citizens and even you are judging people from their appearance ... judging the poor from the cheap clothes, judging the rich from their luxurious clothes, separating the ugly girl from the beautiful girl .... if you are not from the people who judging from the appearance.... congratulations you reach a high level of humanity... that doesn't mean that the other is not human
After half of the day ended, the teacher room always called me
- Mustafa, one minute, please
this is my teacher's room, the other children called her " ANGLE ", she is kind, lovely and funny ... as I think ... I just hear my name from two people the first is Qui Li Yuin and the second is the teacher room
- take this ( she take out a piece of paper that content some money
- sorry teacher ... I can not accept your money, because I didn't earn it
- I know but ... how do you live dependent on yourself
- I work a part-time job for two months until now ... and my grade didn't dropdown
- yeah, I know that your grade is good but ...
- sorry teacher ... I need to go to the cafeteria to eat before the break ends up
You asking that " why are you so cold blood? " ... the answer " maybe because I won't act like a cool guy .... maybe because I don't want to rely on anyone ... maybe because I don't know I act like that " ... I laughed so many times ... or to be accurate... I pretend .... the only person that makes me laugh from my heart, she was Qui Li Yuin .... and the thing that I laughed at .. is myself
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In the break ... the three persons that had beaten... now they are nine .. trying to outnumber me .... at some time I asked myself " why I get bullied? " ... is it because I have a deferent skin ?... no .. is it because I have a wider shoulder?... no .. is because I have grey eyes? ... pftt absolutely not, because it is contacted lenses ... why I choose the gray ? .. I want to be a little different .... so why? ... I indifferent religion from them .... between the students in my school there were the Christians, the Jewish, the Buddhist and even the atheist .... but because I am a Muslim some of them cooperate just to face like the players cooperate to the monster or the big boss
I just want to say " I am just a human like you, all humans have the right to make their believes " ... but this is just a word ... is there anyone want to listen?
The people always said " there is no fair in this life ".... but the truth is everyone is equal in front of Allah .... everyone takes their shares equally.... 100% ... but it takes different forms, health, wealth, smart brain, beautiful face, fit body, net mind and a lot of forms, but you don't feel it
After I have been beaten up, I endure the pain till the school end, after that I always goes to the nearby mosque for the pray ... after I prayed, I feel like a battery charged to complete the rest of the day, so I head to the clothes shop for the work .... in the way to my work I meet some Muslims that they wear masks but I am not, because I want to be different ..... if the all people is the same, you can not recognize your friend in the crowd
I work in a part-time job from seven to eleven at night .... after that, I went to the home to study and do my homework in two hours .... that makes me sleep just five hours only
I can not withstand with them, I don't blame my father that he married my mother ... I don't even know what happened between them before the marriage ... I had earned some wise because I got bullied ...." how?" you ask ... let's assume that in the Olympic race for one hundred meters... I was the last player, isn't that normal for me to see everybody in front of me, I can see their moves ... similar way with life... I am in the last place in the pyramid naturally I can know how the people thinking, listening to their life story, joy, sad and even there love stories
This is my life, the present-day like yesterday... my life became a routine... I have not anything else to say
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[ sob 😭😭.. what a sadness story ]
-... { cause of you, I feel my life turned into babysitting life right now 😥😥}
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The last video
Gonna be a sad one. Imma apologize beforehand. Some Breddy angst stuff and uh maybe some fluff but Idk yet//trigger warning for suicide/self harm/depression. Please, if you know this will push you in a bad direction, please please do not read. Also, if you unexpectedly find yourself being affected in this manner, do not hesitate to talk to me or someone else about it//
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