《i'm only human ♡ sam pottorff》chapter 19
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Ryn's pov
I tired to forget about everything that happened yesterday. The past is the past, you can't undo it. I can't undo it. Nobody can undo it. But, it's hard to forget the past when the past it scared on your forearm. My head is like a broken record, except it only replays the bad memories. I remember how Sam used to smile at me, and kiss me, and take my breath away. That's the good feeling. The feeling of knowing all that is gone, is the worst feeling ever.
I was trying to sleep. Trying to clear my mind. Then, I heard a knock on out front door. Everyone else was asleep so I thought I'd open it. I wasn't scared, but if the person took me and killed me they'd be doing me a favor. I slowly walked to the front door and opened it.
"Sam?" I snapped. I wasn't in the best mood to see him, but I also wanted to kiss him the moment I realized it was him.
"Hey, is Ava here?" He asked. I was disappointed by the question. I wanted him to come back to me. Not Ava.
"Yeah, but she's asleep." I stated trying to hold back any tears that were dying to get out.
"Can you tell her I was here?" I didn't know what else to say so I just nodded. We stood there looking at each other for a while.
"I think it's best if you go now." I lied. I wanted him to come in and be here with me.
"Yeah, guess so." He started to walk away and I watched him walk to his car. He suddenly turned around.
"Ryn?" He said. "I still love you, I'm just trying to get over you." His words made my heart hurt. I had to tell myself he was lying. I got into his car and drove away. I watched him drive until I could no longer see him. I shut the door and put my forehead against the door and began to cry. I turned around so the back of my head was facing the door and I slid down. My knees reached my forehead. I quietly sobbed. I banged my head against the door several times. I got up and went to my bathroom. I grabbed a blade. It feels like it's been forever since I've seen this thing.
I slit my arm several times until I couldn't stand it. A few tears came down my face. My arm was stinging. I just realized, Sam broke me. He tore me piece by piece. I still loved him, I just didn't have the gut to tell him. Honestly, he probably knew it. I sat in the corner of my bathroom. I was bloody, my eyes were red and puffy, and I was breathing deeply. I didn't need anyone to see me like this, again. Even though it was tough, I weakly got up, wrapped my arm in a cloth, and clumsily walk to my room. When I walked to my room I walked like a zombie. I was constantly bumping into walls. When I finally reached my bed I felt miserable. I was was weak and tired. By tired I don't mean sleepy, I mean I'm tired of life.
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"Why me?" I whispered to myself. The tears began to fall harder. Before I knew it, I cried myself to sleep.
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Ava's pov
"I hate seeing her in pain Sam." I stated. Sam and I were on a date, but I had to talk about Ryn. She was important to me. It sucked seeing her like this, but I knew that it was all because of Sam and me.
"I know. But I have to get over her. Listen, you're the only way I can even see her." He explained. I felt like he was dating me just because of Ryn. I didn't want that. This would have to be a true relationship. The wind slightly blew making my hair fly.
"You're beautiful Ava." I smiled.
"I'm cold too." Without hesitation Sam took off his jacket and put it on me.
"Thank you." I say. Sam grinned.
"No problem." I got butterflies in my stomach when he smiled. He really was cute. He gave me a smirk. I wasn't quite sure what it meant until he picked me up by my waist and spun me around.
"Sam!" I laughed. We both laughed then fell down in the sand on the beach. We stared at each other for a while. Sam slowly leaned in and kissed me. We kept kissing until some person told us to get a room. We just laughed at him. At that moment with Sam, everything was perfect.
Ryn's pov
I watched them kiss and play around with each other. It really made my heart hurt. I felt weak to the bone. I'm not a crazy ex girlfriend or anything, but I just had to see Sam. But I didn't want him to be with Ava. I should have known he'd be with her. The thing that made me most jealous was that he did things that he didn't do with me. For example, he just picked up Ava and spun her around, I don't recall him doing that to me.
"They're so cute. Don't you wish it was you?" Nikki asked. All the anger and the words I wanted to say remained unsaid.
"It looks like he loves her more than you."
"He might actually put more effort into their relationship."
"Why did he even like you in the first place you're and ugly ass bitch who gets drunk and gets down with guys."I had enough. Nikki was making me so angry I was shaking just to say something to her.
"Shut up!" I yelled. Most people on the beach looked at me, including Sam and Ava. I knew these people were judging me. I could handle all the judgment. I looked around at all the people staring at me, then I looked at Sam who had concern on his face. I ran off.
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"Ryn!" I heard Sam yell. I kept running. I pushed people out of my way and ran with Sam right behind me.
"Leave me alone!" I said referring to both Nikki and Sam. When I could no longer see anyone staring at me I feel down. Sam wasn't running anymore, but I could still see him from the distance.
"Why don't you just kill me now Sam?!" I shouted. We were at the part of the beach were no one goes. Sam stayed quiet. He didn't move. He just stood still. The reason why no one went to this part of the beach was because this part was deeper. Just one step, you'd be in twelve feet deep water. And I know this may sound silly, but I don't know how to swim. Being from California you'd assume I'd know. I don't.
A lot of thoughts went through my mind. All negative thoughts. I wanted all to end. Not all of it was because of Sam and Ava. Some of it was because I wanted Nikki to go away. I didn't want to become a Voice, but at the moment it sounded so much easier. I walked and walked until my toes were at the edge. I looked back at Sam one last time. Then I jumped.
I was kicking and yelling underwater. I was wasting air. I tried to swim to the top but I had know idea how. I remained underwater. Suddenly, everything was okay. I was almost dead. It was almost over. I shut my eyes and waited for the ending.
Sam's pov
I noticed Ryn wasn't coming up from the water. I became worried. I saw something suddenly come up from the water. It was Ryn. Was she dead? Oh no! I ran as fast as I could go until I got to Ryn's body. I picked her up and lied her on the beach.
"Ryn. Ryn? Ryn!" I shook her. I checked for a pulse, but there was nothing. I didn't know how to do CPR well, but I did it anyway.
"Ryn, please don't give up! I need you, Ryn, I need you." I admitted. There was still nothing. I was sobbing and I didn't know what to do. Ryn was gone. My head met my knees and I was curled in a ball crying. I stayed in that position for a couple seconds. Ryn started coughing.
"Ryn?!" I said with a smile spreading on my face.
"Fuck you Sam." She said very weak and dull.
"What?" I asked. I heard her clearly, but I just saved her life, again.
"I said fuck you Sam!" Ryn yelled. I gave her a confused look. Ryn started crying.
"I just wanted to die." She sobbed. I began crying more as well.
"Stop trying! Because as long as I'm around, I'm not letting you anywhere." I stated. She cried a little more, she was in pain and she wanted it to end, and I stopped her.
"Shh, it's okay." I said trying to comfort her. She pushed me away and yelled,"No it's not!"
"Listen, you're okay now. It's okay." Ryn just shook her head.
"No, Sammy. I'm pregnant." My eyes widened, I froze, and I could feel goosebumps on my arms rising.
"You're pregnant and you tried to commit suicide!" I shouted. I was honestly a bit angry, but I couldn't let it show. I calmed down and spoke again.
"It's okay Ryn." That was the only thing that I could get out of my mouth.
"Oh really! Trying to commit suicide while your pregnant is okay!" She hollered whiled throwing her hands in the air. I remained speechless. "Okay for real Sam, I need you to go. Take Ava with and just go. I promise I won't get mad. Don't even tell me where you're going and just go!" Ryn spoke. My heart nearly shattered.
"Is that what you want?" I asked.
"No. It's what you need."
"What I need is you!" I replied quickly.
"Please, Sammy. Just go." She said softly. A single tear fell from her eye. We both didn't want it, but Ryn thinks she's going crazy, and I don't know weather to believe it or not. I slowly nodded.
"Okay, I'll go." I got up and walked away with Ryn lying in the sand. The sky suddenly turned into a gloomy, depressing color. When I was a good distance away from her, I mouthed these words for the last time
"I love you."
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Basic Skills
Dix, a man whose entire name was a bad joke, thought he’d died and gone to heaven, until reality kicked him in his name again. Sure, he would have a whole new world to explore, one full of magic and adventure, but first he would have to be tested by the gods. They promised the tests weren’t deadly, just painful. If he does well, they might even give him prizes that will make him a target amongst the population of his new world. And the tests of the gods are just the beginning. Follow along as Dix falls back on his tried and true method of making it through life, letting his subconscious do all the work while he looks for girls. It’s not like that led him to his death once before, or anything. And what do you call a life after death anyways? A man too smart for his own good, he is woefully unprepared for what’s coming his way, no matter what he thinks. Trainers, friends, even gods won’t give him enough of a head start for the things people will ask him to do. Despite the odds of survival, he’s got a job to do. Time to get to work.
8 126The Choice is Not Yours
Author's Note: (As of November 20, 2021) I rewrote all the chapters perhaps more than a year ago, but haven't announced that I did so. Because that kind of announcement would include something along the lines of, "I'm working on the story so expect new chapters!" But the truth is, I lack motivation to do anything. And I would hate myself if I broke a promise. I'm extremely sorry if you have been patiently waiting for uploads. These days, I've been studying, not well, but studying somewhat. I will definitely bring more to show, with regular uploads. If not this story then there's another story I've been writing that's really exciting to me. It's not exactly similar to this story since it has a male lead and he is a baneful asshole with even less morals. I hope you'll like it when it comes to existence. And I'll leave my announcement off with the aforementioned promise. Meet Amber, a tomboyish, unstable, and cheeky lass who likes to keep to herself. According to her, she'll live the rest of her life on auto-pilot mode, awhile holding onto the few things that make her remotely happy. However, she forgot that people never really leave you alone, be it humans or even the Gods. And exactly that happens, ending her monotonous life on such the Gods' whim. But at what cost to her? Will she be able to hold onto the things she holds dear? Or will she fail miserably and lose herself in the process? That's what the Gods want to know. Disclaimer: I do not own the cover photo.Warning: If you are easily triggered, I am not writing this novel for you.
8 195The Strongest Species
Humanity won. In the war against the supreme dragons, humanity wrested victory from the literal jaws of the dragons. The strongest species lost their title and was cast down in history as ancient creatures, devoid of any civilization. Their cities, culture, and civilization were completely wiped out, with only the oldest of mages and greatest of anarchs remembering them. Humanity took the achievements of this immortal race and claimed it as their own. Humanity flourished. Now, a thousand years after the war, humanity has forgotten this primordial race. Unbeknownst to even the greatest of humanity's saints, the dragons did not lose to humanity just because of humanity. They had their own hand in their own defeat. But just like they were a cause in their own destruction, they will cause their rebirth without the help of any creature. The dragons will rise again. It's time to reclaim the title of the strongest species.
8 179dreadnaught: scifi apocalypses space marine
The year is 2044, as you might imagine technology has advanced. People are people. And the world economy is still in shambles. America experienced a full financial collapse about a decade before. Riots, rebalance, and redistribution. David was 13 when the protest massacre occurred when his mother died. Of course, the world does not rotate around a teenager. Four years of business college and two good friends and a dream of developing real power armor just to cosplay as a space marine. Of course when you got millions and no real drive for anything else after two divorces. You make it happen. All David had to look forward to was his five minutes of fame as an extra to the next Halo game presentation. They expected him to wear cheap cosplay. Instead, he brought about a million dollars of gear with him. All David expected was five minutes of fame before he turns into a bachelor shut-in for the rest of his life. Instead, the Universe got an update. Witness the rise of the Order of the Free Wardens. Witness the rise of the council of races. Witness the legend of the Dreadnaught. Greetings, I am Zalex. And this is my first ‘Space Marine’ story, Some things I would like to note. All locations, weapons, unit designations, mention of franchises (under the protection of fair use laws), history, and so on is fictitious or used as reference only. Any likeness to real individuals or events or otherwise is merely coincidental. This novel has excessive language use, mild graphic and suggestive themes, mild alcohol use, and scenes of violence. You have been warned.Patreon is now up: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=3631888
8 202Ask or Dare The Old Countries and The Soviets!
ask Me or My Darker Version (Shattered Glass Soviet) any question you think is necessary or personal. No face Reveals, I also except dares. Be careful with My Darker Version, and DO not make him trigger-happy. That is all. (Update: I am going to add the older countries to the ask and maybe make this an ask or Dare the old countries and Me and Shattered. Hope you enjoy!)
8 145Rejection
Kyle's life hadn't been easy. Born as a rogue wolf, packless and wandering, he was used to fighting for his life. He had hoped that after finding his mate, everything would be different.Instead, he was betrayed, rejected and cast out, left to die. Struggling to survive and avoiding pack wolves in general, Kyle soon found himself stuck with a few options left, all of which were not appealing.To survive, he had to put his faith, and life, in the hands of a pack. But could he trust them after what his ex mate, a pack wolf, put him through?
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