That was the question booming inside Benjamin's head, the three words flickering like on a movie screen as he wiped his sweaty palms against his skinny jeans and tried to keep his heartbeat at a reasonable level. Was he nervous? But why? This wasn't such a big deal — going over to Lucifer's apartment to talk about feelings with him, yeah, sounded totally reasonable. That was why Benjamin was telling himself that his erratic heart and wild thoughts were the outcome of standing in a slowly moving elevator, his fear of lifts being the sole reason why he was freaking out.

But even if he refused to admit it to himself, it wasn't just the elevator. It was what awaited behind those doors, which began to slide open once the ride had come to an end with an annoying little ping, causing Benjamin to exhale heavily. Adjusting his leather jacket, he eventually stepped out and drew in a deep breath before walking further into the room — he had never visited Lucifer's apartment before, but he had to admit that it was fine as hell, with luxurious furniture, a glowing liquor shelf, tall bookshelves, grand windows and a lovely piano in the middle of the room. It was very refined, and earned an approving nod from Benji as he eyed the surroundings.

And for a while, he forgot about the nervous butterflies in the pit of his stomach, but once he noticed Lucifer tiredly poking at the keys of the piano while a faint cloud of smoke emerged from a nearly empty glass of alcohol, Benjamin remembered Linda's words and the rush of adrenaline that had encouraged him to take action. He wasn't good at this kind of stuff, but as he stared at Lucifer's back, still hidden by the fancy jacket of his suit, he couldn't help but acknowledge the desire to do that — to bond, do something other than make out and have sass fights.

"Um, hi", Benjamin broke the silence quietly, and whilst he proceeded to shake his head in embarrassment and glance down at his nervously shuffling feet, Lucifer lifted his head to shoot a glance at his visitor. Gulping, he quickly looked away without a word, and unsure how to proceed, Benjamin started to twist his fingers whilst stepping towards the piano, and in the process, Lucifer. "Is everything okay?", he questioned carefully, but when he eventually reached the man by the instrument, Benjamin got his answer.

Nothing was okay.

Lucifer's jacket was torn, his short bloodied, his hair disheveled. Dark circles surrounded his eyes, and concluding from the sad glisten on his features, he had shed a fair amount of tears, along with blood. He looked like he had come out of a war, and accordingly, it had taken a toll on him in every way — Lucifer was shaking, his breaths uneven and quiet whimpers rising from his throat as he directed a profoundly heartbroken look over to Benjamin.

"Oh my— You're definitely not okay. What happened? Why are you— why are you alone? You should have called someone, you could have called me. What's going? Do you— do you want to talk about it?", the Espinoza stammered in panic, drowned in worry as his hand landed onto Lucifer's shoulder sympathetically and with support.

Lucifer remained silent, except for the quiet cries that slipped from his lips, as he let his body fall towards Benjamin. Benji was anything but used to situations like these, but as Lucifer proceeded to sob against his shoulder, he instinctively wrapped his arms around him and squeezed hard, offering him warmth and protection from the cruel, cruel world. He didn't know what had happened, but he didn't need to — the lack of information didn't stop Benjamin from holding Lucifer gently in his arms, his jaw resting atop the man's head as he felt him tremble against his chest.

"I killed him", Lucifer finally murmured against Benjamin's flannel, the words blurred together and almost impossible to divide from one another through the hoarse, shaky voice. But with enough effort, Benji could figure it out, and for a second, his own body froze and his mind began to think over the possibilities of what Lucifer meant. However, he realized that he wasn't scared of him, and with that in mind, Benjamin took a tighter hold of the poor man.

"Who?"

Drawing in a breath with way more struggle than he should have, Lucifer shook his head. "My brother", he whispered, "he was going to kill everyone... He was going to kill you too", his voice barely audible, but it was enough for Benjamin to hear. After gulping loudly, he looked down at Lucifer, who was still twitching with sniffles and staring at the wall, paralyzed with heartbreak and hatred towards himself for the horrible thing he had done. And in that moment, Benjamin realized that they were a lot more alike than he had thought — both played it cool, pretended to be these beacons of confidence and carefree attitude, but beyond all that, were sad men with real struggles, real insecurities, real darkness.

"Did you— did you really kill someone? Your... brother?", Benji trod carefully on the subject, imagining that his words were like knives into Lucifer's heart, and he didn't want to cause the beaten man any more suffering. If anything, he wanted to take all of it away. But he had to confirm, he had to be sure. He needed to know who he was holding in his arms. And when Lucifer didn't reply anything, Benjamin sighed and lifted him up, holding his shoulder with one hand whilst the other went to wipe his tears away.

"Listen", he drew in a deep breath. "I don't know why, but you're different than all the other guys. I'd actually like to make sure that everything is fine, or at least will be. And right now, I can tell you need someone to be there for you, so here I am. Whether you want it or not, I'm a surprisingly good friend, so I'm not leaving you. Okay? I won't let you push me away, and whatever happened, I'm sure we can work this out together", Benjamin explained, pushing away his own troubles and worries and devoting all of his attention to Lucifer. Yes, perhaps Benjamin was feeling like a disappointment and he was beyond messed up, but right now, Lucifer needed a friend, and Benji was more than willing to be that for him.

Forcing a dry, unamused smile through his tears, Lucifer shook his head and looked away. "You don't— you can't understand. You still don't believe. You—you think it's all a metaphor", he protested, insisting that there was no way Benjamin could comprehend everything without knowing all that Lucifer did. But, luckily, the brave man had a solution.

"Then make me believe", he blurted out, and surprised by this, Lucifer looked up with wide eyes. Smiling suddenly, Benjamin nodded to confirm that he was being serious, before continuing with, "I want to believe you, so give me all you got", whilst his hand caught Lucifer's trembling one and wrapped around his cold, slender fingers. The blood on them spread onto Benjamin's skin too, but in that moment, he didn't really care.

Lucifer parted his lips, as if to protest, but he ended up shutting his mouth and taking in a deep breath to prepare himself. Swallowing thickly, Benjamin offered one last nod, and with that, Lucifer squeezed his hand a little bit tighter whilst staring deep into his blue eyes. Benji did the same, getting lost in the abyss of dark brown, but eventually, they grew red and bright. He still looked like the same Lucifer, but the name started to carry more meaning as Benjamin stared into his devilishly red eyes, the wicked shade earning a small gasp from him.

But even if he was unable to explain it, it didn't push him away. When Lucifer let his eyes return to normal, the Devil looked down only to find his fingers still interlocked with Benjamin's, surprising him. Confused, he looked up at Benjamin and let his sad expression light up just a little bit. "You're not afraid of me?", he whispered hoarsely, and licking his lips briefly, Benji could only stare at him, causing Lucifer to fear that it ended up being too much for him to handle, after all. But, eventually, the man broke into a smile and shook his head.

"Like I said, I'm not leaving. You're not my enemy", Benjamin reassured, his thumb gently wiping the tears rolling down Lucifer's cheeks. "In fact, I think you're... well, I'm sorry about the cliché, but beautiful. Besides, this is nothing compared to the date I had with a Swedish guy last year. Nej tack", he rolled his eyes, and at last, Lucifer stifled a chuckle. Shaking his head, the Devil pursed his lips in a soft smile and looked over to Benjamin, a hint of gratitude in his deep, dark eyes.

"I truly don't deserve you, Benjamin", Lucifer muttered quietly, and chuckling at the foolish words, Benji disagreed wholeheartedly — Lucifer deserved only the best. Happiness. Not this kind of heartbreak. "Don't you have a lot of questions? I am, after all, the Devil himself", he then questioned, and shrugging, the younger man let go of Lucifer's hand to turn to the keys of the piano.

"I do, but they can wait. Now, I heard playing piano for the ladies is your move. Neither of us is a lady, but still, I'm gonna play for you, so get ready", Benji cleared his throat, and after cracking his knuckles, he rested his fingers on the instrument, but he couldn't begin when Lucifer had softly intervened, his accent still drenched in heartbreak and the aftermath of uncontrollable sobbing, but even then, it was lovely as always.

Resting gently against Benjamin, Lucifer nudged him. "Are you saying you're making a move on me?", he wondered, and laughing lightly, the Espinoza shook his head.

"For now, I'll just be your friend and a shoulder to lean on. I mean— don't worry, I will always be that for you, no matter what. But maybe not just that", he teased Lucifer, completely forgetting the fact that he was the actual Devil.

To Benjamin, he was still just Lucifer Morningstar — the only person who could handle all of his sass and sarcasm, someone beyond wonderful, a man that carried darkness within him. Someone that Benjamin could relate to, more than anyone else. And as he began to play the piano for Lucifer and tried his very best to keep the man's mind off of his deceased brother, he couldn't help but feel like maybe he had finally found someone truly important to him. Like maybe they could be there for each other, and maybe, he was right where he belonged.

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