I punched in the code combination to the dorm, and the door swung open to reveal bright light that shone in our eyes.

It was an indication that someone was home.

Axel was half-naked with a damp towel draped around his neck, lounging on the couch with a laptop on his knees which he typed feverishly while maintaining a dull expression at the screen at the same time. Chestin was practicing moves at the side of the room with the training equipments installed and stored there for our use. Helene was on the line with Carlos, checking up on home and her three— almost four— year old daughter. Kora stationed her small self in the dark kitchen and was in the process of searching the fridge for edible treats that would fill her stomach until someone paid enough attention to feed her. And Sammy, he was oddly showing a trainee agent around the dorm.

My brows darkened upon entering and I could feel my body boil. Sammy caught sight of me first as he spun around, his mouth still parted open from giving Diana a tour of the place.

"Anne!" he frowned, his arms dropping slowly as he took me and my form in. His eyes hadn't drifted to Liam yet, but he didn't hesitate to take a step forward to me, to which I cut him off by saying, "You have the nerve..."

The boy's eyes flashed confusion and possibly even hurt. Diana spun around and her mouth let escape a sharp gasp, lowering her head when my eyes drilled uneasy stares into hers. Sammy stopped with a quiet skid and attracted the attention of Helene and Kora from the side. The two females eyed me with disbelief and they were only able to utter my name.

"Jamie," Chestin's voice interrupted, a bit staggering from exhaustion.

Axel looked up from his work and his fingers stopped immediately. His eyes went wide, then cold as he glanced to my right, and I swore I saw the glasses lenses flash like his eyes had caught a prey. "James-"

"Why are you here," I ignored my teammates and focused my attention on the intruder of my place, "... You dare?" My own voice startled me as it dropped venom with each word.

"N-No Agent W-W!" my student's voice trembled as she was forced into the spotlight all of a sudden, "I don't dare, I don't ever dare, I-"

"Get your existence out of my dorm. Or can your incompetent head not understand the consequences of breathing the same air that I sleep in?" the voice that came out belonged to some foreign Jamie that was hidden underneath her well-composed one. Never, had I spoken such words to a mere student.

"Get. out., Greenwood."

My voice rang throughout the spacious dorm room as the terrified girl scrambled for her belongings as if she had planned to sleep overnight and play checkers tomorrow noontime. My gaze never left her form until the last bit of her hair had left the dorm and the door had clicked loudly shut.

I looked back at my teammates, disappointed that the atmosphere had become like this when I next reunited with them. But I pained the most staring at the 16 year old boy that admired me so.

"What in your stupid mind made you think that just because I was gone, you could bring your classmate over to OUR dorm. And did you just... give her a fucking tour? Do you have a death wish, Sammy Walden Adler?" I spit out in irritation, eyes narrowing in disbelief at the boy who was staring at me with glossy, bewildered eyes, "Where has my trust gone in you, boy? Who allowed you, Sammy? Speak."

Sammy lowered his head and let out unsteady breaths. "Anne, I'm sorry. I didn't think it was this big of a deal. I'm sorry— it got in my head how much time I spent with you to the point where I didn't register your rank when regarding others. I'm really sorry, Anne."

"It was me that allowed her in, chill out on beating down the boy," Chestin came in sternly, catching my eye.

I turned to my partner and raised my eyebrows. "You?" I clarified, tilting my head a few degrees, "Is this some joke to get me agitated enough to kill someone, Chestin?" My mouth was parted in an unruly smile, but my tone was deadly and on edge.

"You want to talk 'joke' and 'agitated?'" He retorted back, making me hold back a flinch as the man wiped a sweat from his forehead and slowly walked forward, "You wouldn't mind explaining the man to your right, would you?"

Kora and Helene watched in silence as they comforted each other with concerned eyes, standing on the side as they eyed me and Chestin go back and forth, for real this time, in the first time of their living history.

"You saw what played out," I spat back, then frowned as I realized something, "You... didn't seriously just leave me sitting there in the main hall a while ago while not calling for anyone to help... did you? Better yet, did you not even think about coming back to check up on my condition? Because you were clouded by your selfish emotions you left a teammate hanging? If this thing cutting the flesh on my wrist exploded, I wouldn't even be here to argue with you— would that have been a better scenario, partner?"

Chestin gritted his teeth. "I did go call for help. But I was ordered to attend some matters in my SFAD division. You didn't forget I am an agent as well, right? The corporation comes before our own team, and you know that. But," his voice wavered and sighed, softening as he searched my eyes for understanding, "You are strong, Jamie. I trusted you to look after yourself. After being your partner for so long, if I didn't have the faith in you that I have now I'd might as well be a shameless double agent pretending to work with you! But I was in the wrong quite frequently lately and I do acknowledge that I have been giving you a tough time after you came back, and for that I do deeply apologize, Jamie."

I let out a gradual sigh as I eyed the man with unreadable expressions. Was this the end of our stupid arguments up till now? Please... let it be, I didn't know how much more I could take of the man feeling and being humiliated because of me and in front of me.

"... It's alright now," I finally let out, and I see his eyes glinting up with a warm happiness that I hadn't seen in a short while, "What's in the past is the past. As long as you know what you've done wrong. Maybe I could have listened to you more. Now we know we have a lot more to learn about each other then we think, Chestin," I finished in a bitter-sweet end, giving him a faint, reserved smile. He returned my smile after taking a moment to soak in what I meant.

The healing scene was shattered when a low cough penetrated through the air and sent chills down my spine and legs. I was sure the man that I had forgotten for a few minutes to my side could feel the shudders that I experienced just now from Axel's voice.

"So," a new type of chilling tone filled the already tense— now tenser and darker— atmosphere, "This here is, uh, Li-"

"—Leeading the success of the R.U. hackers, Axel!" I cheered with a startling, higher-pitched voice, punching the air with my free fist in pretentious triumph, "Look at that sexy man securing the safety of our corporation! Much respect, much love, Agent O— O' great he is indeed!"

.. Shit. Let me jump out the window instead. Axel can catapult me in place of Liam, I volunteer to go quietly. I will dig my own grave so that he doesn't have to dirty his hands with my unexplainable self.

I let out quiet, nervous laughs as I glanced at the new male put in the spotlight at this dorm. Liam stared back at me with unassociated feelings and continued staring back at the scene that he wasn't sure how to handle.

I needed the name 'Liam' to die for now. No one could utter it anymore in fear that the name would trigger the man cuffed to me. I tried to cover up my dear man Axel, but this wasn't going to end well. I could feel it in the pits of my empty stomach.

The man at the couch raised his brows at me and he seemed to understand that the name should be avoided. But that doesn't stop me from getting in 'trouble,' no.

"Have a seat," Axel warmed his tone, staring at Liam with a subdued smile and friendly outstretched arms.

I glanced at the victim with a stern face and drawn expressions. Do not sit down, my face read in an instant.

Couldn't even if I wanted to, Agent W, Liam spoke up for the first time in the presence of my entire team, making my body tense up in anxiety at what quirky reply the man could come up with in that split second to save his life, I'm tied up to a well-skilled, high-ranked top elite R.U. Agent that knows her way around trigger and bullets like using a pencil and an eraser. Involuntarily. With all due respect, I'd like these off to properly go back to my business without interferences. I have a date in less than 25 minutes.

I didn't even realize I was about to suffocate as I let out the breath that I didn't know I had been holding ever since the man dared to speak up.

But everyone in the room was taken off guard. Sammy watched on in awe, slightly frowning his eyebrows as if he couldn't believe he just saw what happened. Helene couldn't help a slight smirk emerging from the side of her lips as she seemed to silently approve his words while looking at the side of my face. Kora smiled seeing that Helene had smiled as she realized the tension just loosened up in the room.

Chestin lightened his breathing and was now paying full attention to Liam, who waited for his reply to make whatever impact it was supposed to make. But you know it was a success. How so?

Well, Axel broke into a genuine laugh.

Liam's response hit all the vital points that Axel wanted to hear. Number 1, addressing my formal title showed he respected me. 2, acknowledging my skills meant that he acknowledged I was well a competitor and that he understood the intensity of the situation. 3, using the word involuntarily stressed to my team that he did not want to take advantage of me nor the situation. 4, with all due respect addressed that he respected the others that I was close to. 5, voluntarily saying he wanted the cuffs off meant that if he had a choice he would have not involved himself with me. 6, going back to his business meant his mind was still of an agent's and his role still dictates his actions, not his feelings. And 7, and probably the most important one, a date meant that he was taken and there was absolutely chance that he would have anything to do with me in the future other than the current situation.

Axel's laugh warmed everyone's hearts and put us at ease. He had been working all day long on his laptop securing the database that we had and trying to ensure that the organization wouldn't be easily hacked into again that the man had forgotten to eat, sleep, and rest.

My eyes softened and I was filled with a strong desire to walk up to him and into his arms to comfort him. No one else dared to anyway. Helene and him were cool, but not close. She had her own family. Sammy wouldn't let his little boy pride die because of a hug, now would he? Same goes for Chestin and his big boy pride. And little Kora has her little girl pride. Why? Because becoming an agent meant you matured exceptionally faster than your peers, and that may just take the child out of you.

But you could say Axel was my older brother. I had no problem loving him once in a while openly. After all, without him... I probably wouldn't be the same Jamie Lennon I was today.

And it was then that I felt the true pain of being cuffed. It wasn't the bruises or the marks or the cuts or even the man I was forced with— it was the cuffs that physically and mentally prevented me from going back to the life I should have.

I couldn't stay at my own dorm no more, nor stay in the R.U. building, as long as I was with Liam. How could I? It wasn't right to continue living around your teammates with a fully grown man that they didn't know, constantly at your side 24/7. And my and Liam's past were not resolved at all, and until answers presented themselves we couldn't just stall on our butts and goof off when our lives were in danger.

I was deeply afraid whatever I got myself into just recently could potentially harm my team as well.

I wanted a normal life back. I wanted— even if it wouldn't be possible to be like Helene with her boyfriend and her kid— I wanted at the very least to return back to Chestin and Axel.

My heart felt heavy and while everyone was warming up to Liam, I couldn't help but feel slightly detached now, and possibly even a little distaste towards the man.

If he hadn't shown himself, if he had just gone back to the Renai's that day with Isla and Kai, things would've played out differently. So what had exactly happened that day?

What was going through that man's head that made him turn around?

His stuff? No, it was all easily replaceable.

Carter... why, did you turn around? And why, did you get involved with me once more?

I wanted to shout it in his face. I wanted to tell him to leave me be, leave my business, leave my life for good. Even if I couldn't get an answer, I wanted our ties to cut.

His amnesia wasn't for him, I soon figured, it was for me. So that I couldn't ask questions. So that I had no right to shout at his face when he wasn't even 'Liam Carter' in his mind.

In one way or another... I supposed Allison and her family got what they wanted.

They ruined my hope of happiness. The small hope... of an agent's happiness, something so rare that you'd have to for it, or die trying.

Indeed, I loved my work as much as I loved killing a life. Risky, and only once in a while would it really mean something to me. In truth, 99% of the time, I didn't even dare to think what should go through my mind as I'm instructed to shoot a human being and watch them blow up in my face.

And now I wanted to be alone with my dark and gloomy thoughts. But then, I felt like laughing in frustration a second later as I realized that that was taken from me too. The cuffs were a physical restriction to my freedom now.

Back then I gave myself freedom by going solo, back then I had freedom by attending that school and faked a nerd.

I took freedom for granted, didn't I?

Now I couldn't even snipe.

And it was at this moment that I wanted to lock myself in a room, shut my eyes, and rest, but Jay's words on attending the mission with the man stroke a nerve in my mind like electricity smacking me back awake to reality. I let out a dry laugh that escalated.

Everyone heard and was caught off guard. The room silenced itself gradually as heads turned my way and eyes widened in scrutiny.

And let's all repeat now,

Everything, was taken from Jamie.

When one became an agent, they had to be prepared to lose everything... to win something back.

And most of the time that life-on-the-line prize benefited some other man.

-

pain

suffering

very

- M i n n a