Violet

I still can't believe that Alpha Greyson is dead.

Liam told us about it once the council declared a change in Alpha for the Redfang pack not two weeks ago. That means Demitri is now the Alpha. Even though I am now apart of Liam and Anya's pack I could still hear the howls of sadness from my previous pack members. Their emotions and despair running riot through my brain during his funeral. It almost felt like I was standing there myself, right next to my mate. I felt the disconnection from the Alpha when he died but i didn't want to accept it until Liam received confirmation.

It figures, since I was technically supposed to be the new Luna of Redfang since Alpha Malcolm's passing. I would naturally feel the emotions of my previous pack. It was gift given only to the true Luna of a pack, It was stifling and felt more like a curse to me now. All Luna's are given the ability to feel her packs emotions, re call their memories and send waves of love and support onto them through our bond. I had been trying to avoid such feelings this last week as their grief became stronger.

I had been in bits since we got the news. I constantly felt a tightening in my chest and unimaginable pain and sorrow almost 24/7. I knew these emotions were not my own. I didn't want to admit it, but I felt HIS pain too. He hadn't cried yet but I knew he was holding back. I didn't hate him anymore for the decision he made, but that sure as hell didn't mean that I was going to forgive him any time soon. I felt guilty though. It's odd isnt it? That I feel so strongly for a wolf whom i knew for only 5 minutes but the pull and the bond was always present in the back of my mind. I wanted to reach out and send him my condolences but as things were, I didn't feel like he would want me to. Milly was the Luna he wanted and I would only be interfering by connecting with him again. Sometimes, when he slept I would let my guard down so I could send waves of comfort to him and I would wait for the lines on his forehead to smooth out before putting the mind block between us again. Sometimes, It would take hours before he settled and I often thought about him during the day time too.

It's no secret that there was no love lost between Alpha Malcolm Greyson and I, or my father for that matter but I wouldn't wish any ill will on any of the them. When Demitri's mother Luna Hannah died, my mother often spent time with Demitri and would ask me to play with him often as children. When my own mother passed he often sent Birthday cards to me even though he worked for the councill and rarely returned to the pack. He was gratefull for what my mother did for him during those first few months of Luna Hannah's passing and call me a sucker for punishment but I didn't want to harbour too much resentment toward him because of my mother. She wouldn't agree with me being callous and quite frankly, if she were alive today I bet I would have received a dressing down for not reaching out to him already. But I just couldn't. Not yet anyways. I had already forgiven him though and maybe I could forgive Milly too one day. But not yet. I was also replaying our last encounter. He told me that he begged his father to keep me in the pack . My mate unknowingly was trying to protect me even when we didn't know about the bond between us. I shook my head.

I sat on the end of my bed deflated and emotionally exhausted with all of my previous packs issues running wild in my head. It was late now and almost midnight. I had stayed awake most of the week to ensure that Demitri could sleep well but tonight I was too tired. I changed into my pyjamas and brushed my teeth. When I had finished I dragged my feet all the way to my bed and dropped down onto it like a beached whale. Desperate for some sleep.

Within minutes I was tossing and turning. My brain went into overdrive thinking about the pack and their wellbeing. Some of the children had become restless and I could feel their nightmares since hearing about the Rogue King. The mothers were worried about this new threat also and the loss of protection from our old Alpha. whether their would be a war or not and if their husbands, brothers or sons would be paying the price for it. Our warriors were also desperate to fight and avenge the fallen packs from the east. Some of them had family friends living there. Their was much confusion amongst the higher ranks as Demitri had yet to choose a second in command to manage our army and borders. He was under a lot of pressure and so was I. Emotionally at least. I can only imagine if this is the same that Ayna feels with her pack.

I sighed

....

I was shattered and Eventually, I managed to switch off my brain and sleep. But my peaceful dream was short lived.

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DREAM.....

Smoke. Forest. Moon, darkness.

I was in a forest, that much was clear.

But there was no noise. It was like the forest was muted, no birds, no wind, no animals moving. It was eerie and even though I knew I was alone I couldn't help but feel threatened by something or someone. All I could hear was my own laboured breathing like I had been running or something. Only, I couldn't remember whether i had been running or not and if I was running, what from?

Below me the soil was black and my feet felt like I was rooted to the spot. I tried to lift my right leg but I was immobile and i started to be pulled down into the earth slowly. At this point I started to panic and my alarm bells were ringing so loudly I started to scream. Then suddenly it stopped.

'What the hell was that'? I said out loud thinking I could rationalise any of this. I was rooted to the spot and I couldn't move. I tried to remember where I was before this but I couldn't. Then I notice that the light I had from the moon was starting to be blocked out by some clouds and I panicked. My face and hands started to turn dark until I was enveloped in it. My breathing was erratic and I tried to reach out to Layla for help.

'Layla.. are you there'?

No answer....

It was like we were no longer one and I started to silently cry. It was so quiet and I was alone. Layla has been taken from me but I have no memory of ever losing her but I know I have to find her.....

'

I shouted!

'

My anxiety hit a new peak and I started to shake uncontrollably. I searched the trees but could see nothing. It was pitch black and I prayed those damn clouds would move so I could have some light from the moon again. I could feel the voice's presence getting closer to me and the hair on the back of my arms lifted. I was terrified. I couldn't tell if it was a male or female voice. It was distorted and cold.

That's when I felt it, my heart literally broke in two. I mean literally, half of my heart was ripped out of my chest and disappeared in the fog around me. I could hear them. Both of them making love. He kissed her and she him. Tears spilled from my eyes and I tried wiping them as fast as I could but it was a river or water that I couldn't stop. The damn broke and I was flooded... drowning in my own misery. I now wanted this soil to envelope me. I wanted to die. The pain was unlike anything I had felt before. The disdain from my father, the rejection of my mate, being made an outcast. All of it together wasn't even this bad. Half of me was dying and I couldn't do anything about it.... Demitri betrayed me.

The voice and the person around me had disappeared but I didn't care. I wasn't even afraid anymore.

I screamed and opened my eyes. I was back in my bed in my room where I had fallen asleep only Alec was hovering over me with a look of fear in his eyes. He looked worse than I felt. Like my pain was hurting him somehow. He pulled me up and sat my back against the head board before sitting down beside me. I was breathing really fast and now I was painfully aware that I obviously sweated my body weight out during that horrible nightmare. My hair was stuck to my face and the back of my kneck. I must have looked awful but I didn't care.

'What happend Vi, I swear I've been in here for the last five minutes trying to wake you up. It was like you had died or something and you were unconscious for so long and then you started screaming... 'what happened to you'?

I closed my eyes and lent my head back against the wall needing to feel grounded.

'He cheated on me Alec' my voice was creaky like I had been crying for a year.

Alec's eyes widened and he bit his lip. Everything went quite and awkward all of a sudden. I didnt think he knew what to say to me and I didn't really feel like expanding on the subject. But what frightened me in those woods I couldn't tell anyone. It felt so real and I had to hope that it wasn't. It was like this voice was far away but close at the same time.

Far too close for my liking.

I suddenly felt a lock of my hair that had fallen onto my face being pushed back behind my ear. My eyes drifted to Alec, I was expecting to see Pity there but he looked at me square on and said

'my mate did the same to me Vi, I know what it's like to be thrown aside and i know you said you weren't open to a relationship, but i am always here for you even if you just need a friend or someone to talk too. No strings attached'.

He backed away from me slowly and he looked towards the door and then back to me. He didnt want to leave and if I was honest with myself, i didnt him too either but I wasnt ready yet. He smiled knowing that I was confused and undecided. He kissed my forehead and stood from the bed.

'When you're ready, I'll know'.

He closed the door behind him and i stared at it dumbfounded.

'Didnt take you too long to forget about me did it'? Layla spat.

I jumped up right. YES! LAYLA I COMPLETELY FORGOT.

'LAYLA.... oh my god I am so happy you're still in there. What happened and why couldnt I reach you'?

'I don't know Vi, it scared me when I felt you slip away from me. It was like your mind was blocked from me.'

'It was just a nightmare Layla... I'll take you out for a run tomorrow, I think you have been locked inside for too long'.

She almost purred and then paused...

'Honestly Vi, I can feel that a threat is coming but I don't know where or what it is. We should train harder if we can'.

'I agree' I said.

That was the worst nightmare of my life and I had had quite a few. I was willing to give Demitri benefit of the doubt before i fell as sleep. I guess he got a new Luna after all and I got some creepy voice stalker in my dreams. On the plus side though, Alec seems genuine about liking me so maybe there could be some good that come out of tonight. After Dimitri's rondevu with Milly, I felt hollow inside. I rolled over and turned off the side lamp that Alec must have put on when I was having some kind of panic attack when I felt Demitri starting to cry. That's when my the tears fell onto my pillow.

GOOD... I'm glad he's hurting.

Layla whined softly in the background. I didn't sleep that night.

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