"Did a tornado stuck in here?" Vihaan asked as he scanned the room with wide eyes.

Seriously? After all this, he has the guts to say that? Bloody fucker.

"And where the hell were you? I've been fucking looking everywhere. And you come home without telling anyone? I was soo worried, Rishi. Mom dad were soo worried. We called up your parents too and they said they had no idea! Do you know how tensed I was? I thought something happened to you" he said wrapping his hands around me but I took a step back. I don't want him to touch me.

He frowned at my actions and gave me a questioning look. I just took my bag which was sitting on the floor and was about pass him when he caught my hand making me stop.

"Where are you going? And why do you have a bag?" His frown had deepened as he turned me around towards him, staring into my eyes.

"Leave my hand!" I whispered.

"What? "

"I said leave my hand! " I shouted jerking my hand off from his grip.

He was flabbergasted by actions as his eyes flashed hurt and a pinch of anger.

"Rishi! What happened? Why are you behaving like this? Tell me babe!" he was about to touch me again when I stepped back keeping safe distance from him. His presence hurts, his touch hurts, his voice hurts.

"Which part of the sentence you don't understand? Don't touch me! " I screamed again.

His eyes were mixed with hurt and anger as he passed a hand through his hair taking deep breaths.

"Will you fucking tell me what is the bloody matter with you? " he shouted.

I flinched at his tone but didn't backaway.

"Matter with me?" I laughed. I literally laughed as well as tears streamed down my face again. I hate to be weak. I don't want to cry in front of him but I couldn't help it. This hurts soo fucking much.

He caught both my shoulders and forced me to look into his eyes.

"Rishi? What happened?"

His eyes were soo Beautiful, If I hadn't known the truth I would've fallen deep into his pitch black eyes.

"Your eyes are soo beautiful " I said out of the blue.

His face showed nothing but confusion and in any other situation I would've laughed at his expressions.

"Rishi... "

"Kristen!" I cut him off. "She told me everything"

The confusion on his face deepened as he heard my sentence.

And suddenly his eyes widened as realization must have hit him.

I shrugged of his hands from my shoulders and clapped,

"Congratulations Mr. Vihaan Malhotra, you won the bet! You fucked me in soo many ways and in maybe every position within two months."

My heart was ripped out of my chest as I said those words and reality hit me again like a bucket full of cold water.

"Rishita, it's not like that. Please let me explain" he begged.

"Explain? I heard those words Vihaan. If you wouldn't have fucked me, Alvin would have. Here in the same fucking bedroom, on the same fucking bed. And you know what you would've let that happen too. It was for the bet all along, wasn't it? And I thought you loved me"

"Noo! You're getting everything wrong. I love you Rishi, I really do! I agree it was for the bet initially but I have fallen for you in these two months. My words, my commitment wasn't a lie. Please trust me Rishi" his eyes were begging me to believe him. His face contracted in pain as he said those words.

"I have been feeling guilty since the day I started that bet. I was drunk Rishi, and that motherfucker saying things about you made me want to rip his face off. I'm sorry Rishi. Please don't leave me." he whispered the last part as a tear fell down from his eye.

It hurts to see him like this. It's fucking ripping my heart out but I ignored it, took my bag and turned towards the door to leave.

He immediately grabbed my waist pulling me closer to him.

"Please Rishi, believe me. Please." he begged as he knelt down in front of me nuzzling his head in my stomach.

Damn! The butterflies exploded in my stomach as a shiver ran down through my spine.

Fuck you, Vihaan for still having this effect on me. He was crying and so was I.

Heart breaks are the most painful way to say goodbye. And right now it felt like someone was continuously stabbing me with a knife.

I gathered the courage and removed his hands from my waist pulling myself away from him. He was still kneeling down begging me with his eyes to not leave me.

"It's over, Vihaan" I said turning around and leaving our bedroom.

***

There is a tenseness to my muscles that makes me more like a mannequin on this soft mattress than a woman of flesh and bone. I want so much to melt onto the soft foam, wrapped in eider-down, and drift into the world of dreams. Yet my brain is a violent whirl of stupidity, trying to organise. the chaos in my life. It seeks to discover a way to control the capriciousness of people, to acquiesce and please them so that our encounters are softer, less draining. Of course the task is pointless, life is far too random for a human brain to take the billions of factors that come together to form just one day for one person. Though my conscious brain knows all this my subconscious remains stubborn in its attempts to protect me, to ensure my survival. Ironic really, what I really need to survive tomorrow is sleep, at least six hours would be nice. But for that to happen I will have to be out in less than five minutes and not even the double of vodka I just downed can do that.

I was currently sitting at a bar downing my second shot of neet vodka. Yes! I can drink too.

After I left his place, I had no idea where to go, so I came here at the same bar where Neel always bought me. I had taken a few sips before but never this much. The burning sensation in my throat didn't took away the pain I was feeling right now.

I wanted to cry but I felt too numb to feel any emotions. I guess alcohol does that. Makes you numb and hollow.

My eyes were blurry, my body was on another planet and my mind was still stuck with him.

Where am I going to go? My parents have already kicked me out of their lives and my husband used me for a bet.

What a life I have!

As my eyes became droopy, my body swayed as I got up to leave the bar, a pair of strong arms wrapped around me and I smiled at his familiar cologne.

My saviour since day one.

"Neel! " I whispered as I passed out in his arms.

How could I forget him? He has been there since I don't know how long.

My best friend, my home, my everything.