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We remembered the woman with the dark brown hair and amber eyes.

Amber eyes are light brown with some orange, some describe them as ochre or a vivid orange. It's the most rare eye color, since it's a perfect balance between eumelanin and pheomelanin. There's no collagen in them either. I didn't learn this on my own time, but because when you spend time with Iris, you learn a thing or two about eyes (which she's a fan of).

But I remembered the amber eyes on the news, and the amber eyes reminded me of whiskey, naturally. They had the same golden tint. And when I heard the woman's name, Leah Donnelly, I remembered that too. I didn't want to pay much mind to it of course, because that was all in the past and there was nothing I could do to change it now, but the dusty portrait of the woman on a bookshelf with a little kid and a husband reminded me that he killed a woman. A woman with a past, and a name, and a family. A pair of ochre eyes which she viewed her entire world through.

And my father? He murdered her for a few bucks, as if you could put a price on a person's life. He didn't just kill a woman, he killed a family. And that was why he was put in prison.

What were the odds that the tutor — my neighbor — would be her daughter?

It was hard for me to wrap my mind around it when I was looking at the portrait, and it's hard for me now even as I'm walking home. It made sense why she would be thinking about it so often — not because she was a killer of course, but because it had caused her mother's death.

My father had caused her mother's death, and somehow now I'm carrying the guilt. But now I have a decision to make; should I tell her or have her find out herself? I like Iris's company — well, truth is, I like Iris. But this is the exact kind of thing that would make her stop talking to me altogether. And to save the potential of us being friends, I have to keep it shut.

To be fair, it's kind of hard to tell someone, Yeah, so I don't want you to get mad at me or anything, but that dude who murdered your mom? Yep, he's my dad. Sorry 'bout that. So my solution is to skip it as a whole, and have her find out by herself.

But here I am now, over-thinking the entire thing just as she would. Maybe now it's time to take a chill pill or something and take a nap.

Yeah, the latter sounds like a plan.

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When I hear Julian knocking on the door and a laugh following that, I internally groan when I don't recognize the laugh as Julian's. After opening the door to answer it, I see one of my old friends from the year before. Irritably I mutter, "What do you guys want?"

Julian turns to me, a grin still on his face from whatever it was him and that one guy guy were talking about just a second ago. "We thought you might've wanted to hang out with the guys for a bit, you've been kinda isolating yourself lately. I was trying to get a hold of you but you never answered our texts."

"No, I've just been hanging around that girl next door. And you know, work and sh*t keeps me busy," I make up excuses with ease. "But yeah, thanks for dropping by."

"Well alright man, I'll see you later."

I close the door, not believing I used to go with those people nearly every day for the last few years just to ditch school and get high off my *ss. I guess this year had been pretty different. Since I realized Ruby actually kind of looked up to me, I had to be a good role model. And that didn't include becoming the infamous 'bad boy' because you couldn't deal with your emotions in a healthy way.

Either way, it doesn't change what I did in the past, I just can't believe I thought that crap and all would make a difference. Now here I was, in my own apartment with my own car and job and probably only failing one class. Surely it's a step up from last year.

I decide it might be better to finish what I can of the math homework since I figure I can probably do it myself. At least, checking my grades would do me some good. After spending so much time with Iris as my tutor for a week, it was obvious I'd learn a thing or two - not just in one class, of course.

I said to my boss I needed this week off to get my grades back up and have time to move into my house, and now that it's the end of Monday, I realize now that every single weekend is going to be full of work. I'll be getting no free time because I'll be too busy worrying about if the light of the car needs checked or if the oil in it needs changed.

Balancing my priorities has always been a struggle, if you haven't noticed. Although I guess I'm getting it figured out now, it doesn't change that I still have a way of jacking things up for their own jacked up reasons. Mistakes happen. There's always a way you can deal with problems though, even if you take a few years to get it all sorted out.

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