《I am the Night》Chapter 24: Love Advice
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Wayne got up to start his normal morning routine only... What was Clark Kent doing wearing what was obviously Diana's robe and pink slippers while standing in his kitchen? "Clark," Wayne said as sat down at the table.
"Bruce," Clark said as the toaster popped up. He took the toast and started to butter it.
"You, uh... Stayed the night, I see." Wayne looked around for Alfred as Selina came out a moment later and did an extreme double-take seeing Clark in the woman's robe and pink fuzzy slippers.
Selina looked like she wanted to ask something but only opened her mouth and held a finger up not committing to asking the question. Wayne said to her, "Clark stayed the night."
Clark rolled his eyes and then said, "Diana asked me to stay. I only had my suit with me."
Selina smiled and then asked, "Aren't you going to be late for work like this?"
Clark shook his head, "It's Saturday."
Selina looked at Wayne and then back at Clark, "So, then, where is Diana?"
Clark sighed, "She had to go to the last day of her conference. She had me stay here because I was trying to stay away from Metropolis."
Wayne asked, "Mr. Mxyzptlk?"
Clark shook his head, "No, I got into a fight with Lois again."
Wayne nodded and then said, "You were probably the one in the wrong, Clark, but you probably already know that, right?"
Clark nodded and said, "I just didn't want her to be in danger again."
Wayne placed a hand on his shoulder and said, "Lois wants to help the world in the way she knows the best, journalism. You are trying to take the one thing she knows away from her, that's why she yelled at you. The danger is what excites her. You need to support her, be ready to save her if needed, and stay the hell out of the way if not."
Selina nodded along with Wayne, "That's why I fell in love with Wayne, he understands my needs."
Clark hung his head and then asked, "But what if she dies before I can save her?"
Wayne held a hand up to stop Selina and then said, "Clark, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you will have to watch her grow old and die no matter what. A hundred years after Lois, me, Selina, and most everyone you know are dead, you'll still look like a man in his forties."
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Clark looked up at Wayne confused.
Wayne saw Alfred walk in and set down their breakfast at the kitchen table and said, "Come sit down, let's all have a talk." They all sat down around the table. Wayne started to eat and then once he ate the egg whites he spoke, "Clark, as Wayne Bruce on my homeworld Superman was a fictional character. There were many versions of your story but the one thing they all had in common was that you don't age the same as mortals. You will outlive all of us unless you die tragically to one of the many Earth-threatening beings that will come to destroy you. Just like Diana."
Clark nodded and then asked, "Then what are you saying here, that I should just let her walk into danger without saying anything?"
Wayne smiled, "I'm saying that if you love her, you'll help her pack for the trip. The Lois you fell in love with is the one that hears about the war in Ukraine and is on the first flight there to start writing those people's stories. Not Clark's wife barefoot and pregnant in his kitchen making him wheat toast."
Alfred walked into the room and said, "Master Wayne, Ms. St. Cloud is here to see you."
Wayne raised an eyebrow at Alfred and then Selina asked, "Who is Ms. St. Cloud?"
Alfred cleared his throat, "A woman Master Bruce had been seeing."
Silver burst into the room and looked at Wayne, "You have some nerve not calling me for two whole weeks!" She saw Selina and her eyes widened, "Who is she?"
Wayne casually finished his breakfast and then stated, "She is Selina Kyle. The woman I love. The woman I plan to marry."
Silver stared at Wayne with a blank look. "What about us? You told me..."
Wayne shook his head and said, "I told you nothing. I have never said the words to you nor have I ever implied them. Silver, we went to a few charity events together. That's it."
Silver started to look angry and then said under her breath, "I know that you are Batman, Bruce."
Selina leaned over to her and then said, "Yeah, but that guy is Superman." She pointed at Clark. "And Wonder Woman had to leave earlier."
Clark shook his head and said, "Maybe you aren't the best guy to get love advice from, Bruce."
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Wayne stood up and walked over to Silver, "I'm sorry Silver, the Bruce Wayne you thought I was, just doesn't exist. Selina is the woman I love, I'm sorry that's not what you wanted to hear. We have only gone out together six times in the last year, I just didn't see the same level of relationship that you did."
Silver looked at Selina and said, "She looks poor, probably just a servant girl. How could you settle for her, Bruce? She's obviously only after your money."
Selina made a disgusted face, "After his money? I don't even care about money, lady. From what I've seen of it, this money just seems like more trouble than it's worth to me."
Clark nodded in agreement.
Wayne suddenly tackled Silver and yelled out, "Clark!"
Clark grabbed an arrow out of the air and then said to Selina and Alfred, "It seems Bruce is under attack by a man dressed in an owl costume."
Selina said, "So, a normal Saturday?"
Alfred looked at Selina and nodded, "Sadly, yes, yes it is."
Silver was lying on the ground staring at Wayne with a look of awe. Wayne smiled at her and said, "Sorry, give me a moment here. We can finish that conversation once I deal with the Talon."
Wayne jumped up and then ran toward the Talon yelling out, "Clark can you keep her safe a moment?"
Clark nodded and then looked down at Silver and asked, "We were just having breakfast, can I make you some eggs or toast?"
Silver looked at Clark with a dumbfounded look on her face. Selina smiled at Silver and said, "Don't worry about Wayne, he's got this. We also have fresh fruit, yogurt, and mixed nuts."
They helped Silver up and she joined them at the table. As Wayne and the Talon fought through the other rooms the others finished their breakfast casually talking about relationships. Selina looked at Clark and said, "Wayne is totally right. You can never save a woman from the life she wants to live. All you can do is either help her do it safely or stay out of her way and pray."
Clark nodded and then asked, "What if I really want her to be like my mother was, you know, at home raising our children?"
Selina shook her head and then said, "You have to find a lady who wants that life. I can tell you, that kind of woman is probably not one who would be happy with a husband who is always rushing off into danger himself. She's looking for a man who wants to work and create a nice stable nest egg for her and her children."
Selina looked at Silver and asked, "How about you, Silver, what kind of man are you really looking for? Cause I'll bet it's not one like this jackass." She pointed to Wayne who had picked up the man in the owl suit and was throwing him through a glass table.
Silver made a face, "I guess you're right... I wanted a man like Bruce Wayne or what I assumed Bruce Wayne is like... Rich, handsome, but not one that is always out in the limelight. Someone who doesn't drink or smoke. Uh, good in bed." She blushed a bit.
Selina snorted and then said, "Yeah, but the constantly having your life threatened part isn't something you wanted right?"
Silver shook her head no. Clark looked intrigued and asked, "So you are saying that the very things that make Lois attractive to me are also the things that I hate about her?"
Selina shrugged at Clark.
The Talon in the other room yelled out, "Who the hell are you?"
Wayne smiled and looking dashing said, "I'm Batman."
The Talon stood up straighter and then asked, "Wait, Bruce Wayne is Batman?"
Wayne shrugged and then said, "Why, is that strange?"
The Talon shook his head and then said, "No, it's just way too obvious."
"Right? I can't believe people are genuinely shocked to find that out." Wayne and the Talon started fighting again.
Clark looked at Selina and asked, "Why is it obvious?"
Selina sighed and then looked at Silver, "You guessed it, right?"
Silver looked to be put on the spot but finally said, "Batman is obviously rich because of all the equipment he uses. He's young, in great shape, and he's obviously super intelligent. You may not know, but if you spend enough time around rich guys you'd know that Bruce Wayne has always been the only one who could be him."
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