Chapter Nine

Alone with you

Still leant on the wall, he half-turned to watch Alessandra dash out of sight.

“Come in.” He heard Karou’s familiar voice allow.

Grasping the ornate brass handle, Warren pushed the door out before him. He was met with a room that used to be an observatory. A glass dome sat like a crown in the centre of the ceiling. It was a window to the starlit evening sky above. As if the room wasn’t transparent enough, huge windows lined two walls and hung open to let in the cooler night air.

Against one of the walls sat her bed. Nobody had slept in it in quite some time, even though it appeared well used in as much as it’d become her impromptu office – notebooks lay strewn across the sheets. She still had untidy habits, it seemed. It was amusing and endearing in equal measure.

It struck him how her private chambers were quite the opposite of the home they once shared. It wasn’t a gloomy, half-buried, windowless concrete bunker. The sandstone and marble architecture of the castle carried through, and with all the glass, the place felt light and airy.

With the sense of her habitat established within a matter of seconds upon his entry, his eyes found her. Karou was sitting on the stone ledge of one of the open windows; both legs dangled over the side without fear of the height. It didn’t matter if she fell because her wings would save her. She was dressed in her day clothes, a pale blue summer dress, the thin straps tied over her shoulders for the sake of her wings.

Silently, he stared at her from the doorway. His hands tucked passively into the pockets of his pants. When Karou finally turned her head to look at him, the breeze messed the dark tresses of her hair, but he’d always thought that windswept look suited her.

“I wasn’t sure if you’d come,” she began; her tone seemed nervous. “I told the guard to leave you be if you were sleeping or didn’t want to leave your room.” Hoping away from the window, Karou stepped closer so that her healthy-looking eyes gleamed in the dim light. “I thought we could talk a little… if you wanted?”

Old habits died hard, so it stood to reason that Karou was cautious around him. She couldn’t help constantly feeling aware that there was a chance he might not want to be around her at all.

It stung to see her wilt to accommodate his oscillating moods by default; Warren cursed himself for ever having made her feel inferior or frightened of him. Regardless of having been estranged for so long, it was flattering and soul-destroying to witness the impact he still had on her.

“Why wouldn’t I have come?”

“You’ve made it clear before now that you never intended to come to Enoch.”

“I didn’t come of my own will, but I might as well make the best of it. When Alessandra came to fetch me, I couldn’t very well have refused knowing you’d be waiting.” Warren smirked.

Karou wasn’t sure how to take what he’d said. Her face drew a blank, her head slightly tilting on its axis.

Suddenly he hung his head in a lapse of confidence. It all seemed to come over him at once.

Karou was there. He was in her presence once again, and what was more, she seemed nervous.

He seemed comfortable standing in such proximity, but noting how well she looked, how her skin and eyes glowed as they used to, as he so fondly remembered, Warren felt uneasy in his own skin. It itched. He feared that the only salve might be her. Thus, a seedy thought formed; if she were to put herself all over him, he might feel better.

“Karou… I didn’t mean to insinuate that-…”

“I know. I know you would never have come here under your own steam.” She cut him off, knowing as much was true, even if she could never understand why.

“Right.” Warren hung his head a moment, defeated by her easy acceptance. Acceptance that didn’t stop him from feeling sullen. He would always feel guilty for not having fought harder to keep her; he was sure she held a secret grudge against him for that.

At this point, he glanced over her shoulder at her impressive private room, eyeing the windows particularly. He was almost inviting himself in without realising. “You thought I was dead, did you?” Shrugging off his ‘moment’, Warren decided maybe he should attempt to make conversation. It wasn’t an art he had much skill in, admittedly, but he didn’t want to sour Karou’s mood.

“You can come in and sit if you like? The sky is particularly pretty tonight.” Reaching out her arm, she welcomed him in and gestured over to where she’d been sat, in the window: a book and a mug of coffee marked in her place. There was a modest sitting area directly in front of it; she gestured to it if he wanted to sit there instead. Barefoot, Karou padded back to the window and perched on its ledge. Behind her, her wings shifted and rearranged themselves comfortably.

Warren hadn’t had the opportunity to look at Enoch yet, so he flocked straight toward the window and gazed out the view. Quietly, he admired the coastal scenery until he was distracted by Karou and how her feathers caught the light.

“And uh, yeah. A few months ago, I had a vision of sorts. I saw you. You were unwell, and I felt this...” She gestured about the space before her chest. “It felt like you were gone.”

In resignation, he responded to her troubling vision: “I was ill a couple of months back, but I pulled through.” Warren didn’t realise what had thought was an innocent dream about his death had somehow reached her and left her with the notion that he’d died.

From nowhere, a thought came to Karou. Her head tipped to the side curiously. “Earlier… Did you say Alice brought you here? Hmm, she’s normally asleep at this time...” Karou didn’t seem too concerned; she just shook her head, having found it a little odd.

As she'd suggested, he took a seat and nodded, “Mhm, Alessandra brought me. Both you daughters seem curious about, uhm... us. But I think I like them. They’re a credit to you.” A faint smile was permanently fixed on his lips as he kept his eyes trained on Karou sitting on the window sill, backlit by the tangerine dusk sky.

Karou leaned her back against the stone arch of the window, tucked her slender legs up into her chest, and wound her arms around them. “They’re curious because they don’t know much about my life before I came here. Alice probably knows more than Cassandra does, for obvious reasons.” She replied with a shrug.

She was always restless these days, she didn’t keep still for very long, and her legs extended away from herself again. One draped over the sill and down against the Palace’s outer walls as she thought, playing with the hem of her sundress. The small silence that was growing made her more anxious.

In his chosen seat, he folded his legs and looked very comfortable, but Karou’s fidgeting meant that someone what bothering her. “Karou, how do you feel about me being here and very much alive?”

“I’m not sure how I feel about you being here, actually. I was in court when my vision happened. I thought it was just a slight headache, but then the images came into focus, and I saw you as clearly as I see you now. It scared me. But now you’re here, and you’re alive so...” She exhaled a long sigh as if it were out of relief. “Well, anyway, you’d love the city, especially at this time of year, but I wished you’d come by choice.”

“Why were you scared? You don’t need me. You’ve no reason to fear my death. It’s inevitable, afterall.” He flashed a reassuring smile, a gentle, tender glint still in his dark eyes. “You’re all grown up now, a mother, a Queen... Don’t you think you’ve outgrown me?”

Able to see him untainted by her thirst and with a calm mind, she studied him from her perch, eyeing the way he had positioned himself in the chair. His mannerisms were just the same as they’d always been. Lounging with his arms stretched down those of the chair, legs crossed, ankle to knee, was nostalgic. All he needed was a couple of props, such as his reading glasses and a newspaper crossword to puzzle over. Perhaps a cigarette to take sparing drags from, held between his nimble fingers, which might also hold a slowly emptying rock glass filled with scotch. Then he would have been the picture of himself. That was the portrait of Charles Warren Howard that Karou had etched in her mind. Her Sire. Her imagination took her back in time.

What he said made her shake her head in silent disagreement. To her, it didn’t matter how much time had passed. Nor how much she’d grown as a person. Regardless of her title as a monarch or status as a mother of two grown daughters, she would always be his Fledgeling.

Warren interrupted her silent disagreement when he said, “I’d love to see the city, the Palace even, but I fear that I’m not here as a guest. I don’t think that your people want to drop their case against me, regardless of whether they have a solid one or not. They, er, resent me for Siring you, so I have been informed.” Warren closed his eyes for a moment, looking as though he were at peace. A contented smile remained on his lips, and he was quiet for a time until he sighed and admitted. “I’m pleased to see you again. I thought you’d be vengeful. I haven’t been the best of Sires, Friend or otherwise. It wouldn’t have surprised me if you’d have done the same to me as you did to our ‘friend’ Roman Black.” His brow furrowed as he thought aloud.

She smirked and shook her head; he was wrong again and on so many levels. She’d never wished him harm. Even though she’d cried nights away missing him, and then her dreams had turned to nightmares when she realised that his arms around her were utterly imaginary, she’d never been able to resent him. Not for letting Cambria take her away. Not for never hunting her down. Not for his stubbornness regarding keeping his nose out of her life. Not even for letting her go three times, because deep down, she knew that he did it all for her. If anything, she was always left a little disappointed in herself, that she’d never been able to convince him that he was enough for her. She wondered if the demons that lurked about the darkest corners of his mind still whispered self-effacing lies to him. She hoped not but thought it was likely, seeing as he didn’t seem to have changed. Now, she wanted to comfort him

Karou climbed off the window sill, but instead of sitting next to him, she chose to perch upon the arm of the chair - just like she had so many times back at the Compound. “I’d miss you if you were gone. Wouldn’t you miss me?” It was something she often wondered – had he ever missed her during their fifty years apart? Did he ever wonder what she was doing or who she was with?

He instinctively moved his arm around her lower back as she lowered herself to sit beside him. His fingers twitched; subconsciously, he’d considered laying his palm onto the side of her thigh. Reason spoke to him; that would have been overly intimate. So instead, his fingers curled tightly to the arm of the sofa.

Missing Karou had become a reflex too. Not a day had gone by since they’d parted where he hadn’t missed her. Warren figured it wasn’t wise to admit that just yet. Karou was an emotionally driven person. Things could quickly get out of hand if emotions were high, especially when he already had to consciously keep his hands to himself.

“You’ve never really left me, not in my mind anyhow. I’ve thought about you often over the years.” He let his head fall back against the chair and turned it to look at her directly. “After Italy, I wasn’t sure what do to. I know I convinced you to let what will be, be, but I didn’t find it easy. Still, you wouldn’t be where you are now if you’d stayed with me. I’d have always regretted holding you back. I never wanted you to grow to resent me, Karou.”

He was right; it hadn’t been easy being so far away for so long… “We’ll never know what could’ve been, will we? Or what will be, either, I suppose.” Karou watched her hand reach to sweep his hair from his forehead, and before she could stop herself, she’d traced her fingers down his cheek too; in one sweep, she’d stroked the back of her fingers under his chin.

Normally, after a period of distance or a fight, she’d noticed there would be a thawing out period between them - Warren would put up his icy façade and initially feel impossible to reach while she’d be sulkish yet itching to hug it out until she felt better again. They’d clash until neither could bear not to touch the other.

It was no surprise to her how quickly she’d reverted to her old self. She had always wanted to be tactile with Warren, so it was typical that she’d reached out first. This time around, she prayed that the period in which the tension would gradually slip away would be brief.

“But I wanted to thank you,” she murmured. “For earlier, it... it meant a lot to me.” Now, she pushed her hair away from one side of her neck and glanced up at him from under her lashes. “If you wanted to?”

“Is that an invite or a request?” He looked up at her from his lower seat and raised a brow to compliment his slightly coy grin.

A slow moment of thought passed.

Warren sighed through his nose. His voice fell into a whisper as he felt the moment was turning bittersweet. “Karou, where is this going? It’s cruel to set ourselves up for a fall...”

At a loss to answer the question himself, he pulled her from the arm and onto his lap - the moment he couldn’t bear not to touch her had come and just as quickly had Karou had prayed it would.

When she slid down onto his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck like that was the only natural place for her to be.

“But you helped me earlier... and your eyes.” She said and reached one hand back around to trace the bit of skin just underneath one of them. “You know it has the same effect on you that it has on me.” Her wings lifted hopefully behind her while her free hand reached up, and her fingers lightly grazed over the nape of his neck.

Groaning at how difficult he was finding it to deny her, he gave in some and coiled his arms about her lower back when she moved in closer; she fit against him in such a comfortable and snug manner. His nose brushed up the side of her neck, and Karou leaned her cheek inward, encouraging him to go on.

Pleased by how quickly she found herself in his arms, Karou knew that he might give in to his urges if she waited patiently.

Warren drew a deep breath through his nose, and Karou’s scent filled his lungs. He groaned again, “Hmn, you smell so good.”

Relaxed and at ease, Karou hummed contentedly and curled her fingers into his hair to reassure him; that she wanted his fangs at her neck. She stretched out her neck and smiled at how wonderfully tantalising having him so close to biting her felt. “Like… Sunshine… Right?” Karou’s eyes fluttered closed; he could hear her smile through her words.

As if he needed reminding how he’d once described her. The only way he felt properly described the calm that washed over him when she let him taste how sweet she was was to simply call to mind how one might feel when laid, relaxed and soaked in warm sunlight. Warren’s fangs were already in place, and he teasingly grazed them across her neck. “Damn it; you’re so persuasive.”

Having anticipated this moment since the last time he had fed from her, he was as gentle as his impatience would afford him when he finally gave in. Warren sunk his sharp dagger-like fangs into Karou’s flesh with a relieved groan. The lust for her blood instantly set in and caused him to pull her in possessively.

Mirroring him, the moment Karou had felt her skin split beneath the points of his canines, she’d tried to move closer. It was barely possible, but she shifted to reposition herself on his lap. Straddling his lap, she sighed happily and whispered encouragements into his ear.

Warren had no intention of prematurely breaking contact with her neck and fell into concentrative silence. He didn’t even think but communicated through physical actions alone. From his touches to the eager nature of his feed and rapid breathing pattern, it showed yearning but not a glimmer of aggression. Instead, he was slow, patient, and committed to savouring their time together as Fledgeling and Sire. Warren coiled his right hand onto her waist. His left forearm ran up the length of her back so that his hand could support the nape of her neck where his fingertips weaved into her hair.

The way Warren reciprocated convinced Karou that she had been right to offer herself to him. It was a sweet irony to Karou that giving herself to Warren always made her feel complete. “Ah,” She sighed once more, “Warren, I… I missed you.” Breathing heavier, overwhelmed with both love and lust, Karou arched back her neck submissively so he could feed with more ease. Her blood was golden and sweet as it had always been, and she hoped it pleased him and thoroughly gratified his bloodlust. “Mmm, I missed you so much; it hurt.”

Slowly he withdrew his fangs, though not after lingering a while over the golden wounds, carefully kissing them as they healed.

“I never wanted to hurt you, Karou,” Warren whispered.

Now that they’d shared blood again for the first time in so long, he convalesced.

Totally relaxed beneath her, he sunk further into the chair with a contented smile and closed eyes. He didn’t know if he dared to tell her that although sharing blood with her gratified him completely, he feared his past addiction would rear its ugly head if he made it a habit. He’d lost months’ worth of memory after she’d left the compound, consumed by withdrawals. To this day, he had no idea how Magnus got him through it.

Magnus… Magnus, his mentor. A man who, for all intents and purposes, was his father and so much more - a friend and confidant, a therapist, a protector, sometimes an enabler. A person who was unquestionably as precious to him as Karou was now someone he’d never see again. He’d fallen to Roman’s madness and lost his head for a bogus crime.

Karou wasn’t privy to how dark Warren’s thoughts had turned; with her head leant forward so that her forehead touched the middle of his chest, she held him close. She didn’t want him to disappear; not yet, anyway.

After the long pause in which she let him catch his breath, she peered up at Warren while her wings relaxed. “Better?” She hummed softly in a state of contentment. That all too familiar blush was staining her cheeks amber in its usual adorably yet slightly sultry manner.

A resonant humming echoed about his head as he felt the buzz take him over. He merely grinned, sated, in response to her question. He already dreaded the comedown and anticipated a crash that he’d have to hide from her somehow. He couldn’t help but think, Once an addict, always an addict…

Still, for now, he felt refreshed and wired. As though someone had turned on the ON switch, Warren’s eyes opened wide, a vivid blue, the colour of an uncovered iceberg fresh out of Arctic snow.

“You mentioned how beautiful your city is...” Warren grinned cunningly. He’d come up with a plan and no longer desired to stay hidden away in the Palace, regardless of the Enochian court’s wishes. He was more awake than he’d felt in years. His eyes were almost glowing, while his skin had found new youthfulness. He captured her gaze and said, “Take me out someplace. How about that?”

“Well, this is the time of night that I’d usually do my exploring…” Karou admitted. Lightly, she kissed the very tip of his chin before climbing out of his lap.