Frank:

I snort loudly despite knowing I really shouldn’t. I mean, who could really blame me?

“Wait. Lemme get this straight. The one you like is the short one with the fancy hat.”

Clearly she must have really liked the hat, because there was absolutely nothing attractive about the boy. He was scrawny, shoddily-shaven, and stood a towering four foot ten at best. Man, he even made Dave look tall, but Dave at least had the face to back it up.

“Yeah, well, he’s a nice guy. Reliable and all, and- you know, it seems like he cares.”

Oh god. Did she just- She did didn’t she? She just pulled the personality card.

“So you like fun-sized for his personality, eh?”

“Do-Don’t call him that, and he’s not that short.”

I stared at her hard for that one. It didn’t take long for her to cave.

“Okay fine, he’s a little short, but he’s a really nice guy okay?”

“Uh huh,” I said, entirely convinced that the kid that couldn’t keep his eyes off her chest for more than five seconds at a time had a good personality. Heck, she’d said the same thing about the last five guys, and one of them was practically Satan’s second cousin removed.

“Look,” I said, rolling my eyes. “I know you’re getting a little desperate here.”

“I’m no-”

I lifted a finger hush her. Really, life would just be so much more pleasant for her if she just stopped to listen to me more often. I pat her shoulder gently and sent her a reassuring smile.

“Value yourself a bit more alright?”

Her eyes widened and her lips seemed to quiver for a split second before liquid started leaking from her eyes. Huh. Wait. What? Wordlessly, she turned tail and briskly walked away.

No really, what did I do?

* * *

Rachel:

God. Fucking. Damnit.

Was it so hard for him to just be a little considerate for once? Like, yeah, Frank was charismatic, intelligent, and cared when it really mattered, but why was he so, fucking, dense? Was it so hard for him to send me a straight message for once? He’d said yes when I asked him out for dinner, and we even went to the aquarium afterwards and had (at least what I thought was) a wonderful time. I mean, I even pecked him on the cheek after that. How much clearer was a I supposed to be?!

And then there was that time where I introduced him to Lucas. Lucas gave off a bit of that bad-guyish vibe and had a bit of a crude mouth, and was also really overprotective (which I admittedly found a bit scary). Here I thought I’d finally got Frank jealous, so I broke up with the asshole, but no, he just started complaining about how Lucas was just a shit person overall and that I had shit taste in men.

Yeah. Maybe I really did have shit taste if I fell for a guy like Frank. Maybe I did need to respect myself a bit more. I should just give up on him, call it a day, and just break off ties. Who needed that asshole anyways? Hell, I’d find someone better. Someone who actually took time out of his day to listen to what I had to say instead of immediately assuming I didn’t have two brain cells to rub together.

My tears just wouldn’t stop as I waved a taxi and got in. The driver stared at me weird, but I couldn’t care less right now. Today had been a long day.

* * *

Blake:

What had just unfolded pained my heart. The girl left in tears, and frankly, I pitied her. The two of them looked like they had some nice chemistry going on too. Imagine that. The boy probably didn’t even realize, and unless I told him, I doubt he never would. It was my responsibility as both a man, and an upstanding individual to help this young couple out.

“Hello, I couldn’t help but notice what transpired. Shouldn’t you chase after her?”

The boy looked over at me and smiled. There was a slight tenderness and lukewarmness in his expression. It was clear he cared greatly for the girl.

“Nah, it’s fine. I’ll talk to her about it later. But, nevermind that. What’s your name?”

The travesty. How dense could this boy be? My heart sent its condolences to the young girl who fell for this idiot, but now I was here to resolve this. At last her love would bear fruit.

“Blake, and what’s your name? Are you sure? You two looked like a nice match.”

The young boy blinked twice before awkwardly smiling. Ah, he must be afraid of commitment. I understood him well. It wasn’t that he was dense, he was clearly faking it!

“I’m, uh, Frank. With Rachel? Nah, man. She’s really nice and all, but I don’t think it’d work out.”

I shook my head. I understood. I too, used to be a man with little self esteem.

“No, I’m sure it would. She’s pretty, but you’re quite handsome yourself. Nice face, firm muscles. I’m sure you two would make a great pair. Come on, take a leap.”

“O-oh, you really think that?”

“Of course,” I said with a firm conviction. Look at me doing such a good deed. You’re welcome young lass. Now it was your turn to confess your feelings to hi-

His fingers stroked my arm gently and a sultry smile spread across his face. This time, I blinked twice. Perhaps...

“You know, you have some nice muscles yourself. Are you doing anything tonight?”

“Perhaps you misunderstood, That girl- you- you know. Trying to get you two together and all, haha.”

Alas, I’d misunderstood. Surely if I cleared this up, he’d understand.

“Oh come on now. Don’t be like that,” he firmly gripped my wrist and raised his brows. “Didn’t you say to … take a leap?”