《Making a Living: A Necromancer's Journal》Roses are Red, Dead Boys are Blue...(Pt. 1/2)
Advertisement
Dear Diary,
The last person I expected to be on the line when I answered "Vitale Vivification, I'm Bernadette, how can I help you today?" was Kate Beghana. Yet, there she was...calling me...to go have drinks.
I was so shocked I said yes. Idiot move, I know.
We met up at Lyre at 7:30. She was wearing a sun dress and her dark skin was glowing like she'd been tanning somewhere exotic. I'm so pale I think I glow in the dark at this point. She went to the bathroom so when the bartender asked, I ordered her usual gin and tonic along with my usual root beer highball. When Kate asked me how I knew what she drank I couldn't speak. I felt like was choking on my own tongue and stared stupidly at the napkin in front of me.
Thankfully the bartender was the annoying kind and, since Lyre was quiet right then, he asked if we went to Latimer. It was an easy assumption since Lyre is popular among magic students.
Kate explained that we were recent graduates. She then gave him the cold shoulder and asked me how freelance necromancy was treating me. She'd seen my flyer at The Grind.
The bartender didn't take the hint and asked if I was a necromancer. Real brain trust, this one.
"Bernie graduated top of her class," Kate said. I was ready to dig a hole in the floor and join Lady Delia Arnault in her grave.
Bartender then asked if my rates were better than Crane Renovations. I took to drinking deeply by that point and could only nod as the alcohol burned my throat.
"I have a job, if you want it. I'll..." He looked around for a moment then leaned towards me. I could smell his cologne a mile away and when he leaned in it felt like a cloud of synthetic pheromones washed over me. Did I mention I felt like digging my own grave at that point for relief?
Advertisement
The bartender offered to cover my tab for a month if I could handle a job for him related to his grandmother. Kate was ecstatic and before I could even ask what kind of job it was told him to make it two months, in writing. I gaped at her like a puffer fish while they worked out the deal.
After it was all said and done, Kate gave a half-hearted apology for charging ahead without checking on me. She said she was glad to see me doing well and wanted to have drinks again "real soon." I agreed, set up a meeting time with the bartender tomorrow to figure out what his deal was with his grandma, and went home to crash.
...
Bartender's name is Kyle. Of course it is. And Kyle's problem, Diary? He was supposed to be house sitting for his grandmother, who, btw, is very much alive! (She's vacationing in Florida.) Thing is, part of the house sitting gig was to care for her beloved garden.
Grandma is back in a week and said garden looks like a good setting for a zombie apocalypse film. Not a green leaf in sight. I don't know what the lady was known for growing but I doubt it was sticks, rocks, and dirt.
Kyle wanted me to revive the whole damn garden that he hadn't even noticed much until a day or two ago when grams called and asked about it.
Thankfully it wasn't a technically difficult spell and didn't require a dead loved one or midnight. It did, however, require blood and bone. We got some pigs blood from the butcher who asked if we were going to pull a Carrie and to make sure that it didn't get back to him if we did. The bone meal we got from the garden center at the local super store. I mixed it in a plastic tote with a stick I broke off one of the dead bushes. Then I slashed Kyle's hand to mix his sacrificial blood in.
Advertisement
Kyle fainted at the sight of his own blood. It was a blessing. At least I didn't have to deal with his babble. Dude had the nerve to ask me if Kate was single...I should have went old school and sacrificed all of his blood and resurrected him afterward. That tended to be messy and required me moving his body around. I don't have an assistant to help me and he was bigger than me so...I'm just glad he fainted.
Anyways, I did the Locus Revificarum rite and things happened about as you would expect. Big bursts of green, flowers bloomed, yadda yadda. Kyle will be pruning the next few days to get some order out of the place otherwise Grandma is coming home to a jungle.
Two months of free drinks in my future, I went home and prayed for a decent client.
Advertisement
- In Serial14 Chapters
Morcster Chef [THE MANGA/WEBTOON]
The Webtoon for Morcster Chef has come to RoyalRoad! Enjoy! Adventurers flock to massive crypts brimming with riches and promises of power. Heroes storm the gates of dark fortresses, their swords drawn in the name of freedom. Gods tear the heavens asunder, clashing over the fate of the realm itself. Arek cooks lasagna and tops it with a dash of finely chopped basil. An orc who has seen more than his fair amount of fighting, Arek wants nothing more than to share his love of cooking with the world. However, when Ming and her crew of misfit adventurers hire him as their full-time chef, Arek's plans of avoiding violence crumble. He swore off killing for money and fame, but you can't make Wyrmfire Steak without killing a dragon.
8 108 - In Serial16 Chapters
Hundred Worlds
A story about finding oneself in an ever changing reality and new alternate reality. Follow the MC as he tries to live up to his convictions and the changes he makes when he realizes he has strayed away from his path...
8 127 - In Serial72 Chapters
Sovereign
Is it possible to become a supreme being? After his withdrawal from Space Forces, in which he had spent twenty years of life, Captain Sava Gromov desires an extra reason for his existence. With a vague idea of becoming a merchant, he buys a secondhand spacecraft, loads the cargo, and leaves for an adventurous journey through the Solar System. On his way, he receives an SOS coming from a damaged research spaceship. To rescue the crew in a crisis is the easier part; the harder part comes afterward. The research team discovered an abandoned weapon, originating from a forgotten empire. Unfortunately, not everyone considers the vanished empire harmless. There is an organization actively destroying its remnants. Only two choices remain for Gromov: either to die or operate the unknown weapon in a slight hope that the archaic device may deter his pursuers. Choosing the latter, Gromov assimilates with inhuman digital being into the ultimate symbiosis of the organic and digital world. The Universe turned out to be a dangerous place: full of conflicts, threatening aliens, and unpredictable twists. The unmanageable chaos dwells in desperate need of a unifying force. Will Gromov become the Sovereign of the Solar System? Or will he become the ultimate enemy of humankind? There is an official repository for Sovereign on Github. If you are familiar with Github, you can suggest your edits there.
8 204 - In Serial10 Chapters
Slaves to Armok: Rebirth of the Shinerock - a Dwarf Fortress story
Bomrek is a dwarf who has hired on a troop of six other dwarves set to travel to a rumoured colony far to the south. Tales of silver, gems and other riches surround this place, but will it be what the people whisper about? Their arrival reveals the sad truth of the colony. Standing before rubble, the seven dwarves must make the hard decision: stay and rebuild or return to safety? This story is based on Tarn Adam's a.k. Toady One's famous free video game "Slaves To Armok: God of Blood Chapter II: Dwarf Fortress. The language, creatures and rough setting are taken from the game, but the characters, story and exact world are all my creation. Please support Toady One. This story is being published on RoyalRoad, Inkitt and Wattpad.
8 129 - In Serial11 Chapters
Are You Ready?
If your just in that stage. Or look forward to something so descriptive it makes you wet. Or gets you thinking. There passages. Lesbian. Pussy dripping passages. They will have you wanting these things in minutes.
8 159 - In Serial33 Chapters
Axis:Legacy
Years have passed since the Axis Conflict, a war that nearly tore the Axis region apart between the two Kingdoms of Jorouse and Exavis. In hopes of preventing yet another war, a Military Academy designed on training an elite and neutral force was made to serve as peacekeepers. This Academy is known as Axis Academy dedicated to the former heroes of the War, Arios Elpis and Andras Desper, who had perished. Unbeknownst to all, their long lost Children had enrolled into the Academy not knowing the heroic lineage they carry.
8 242

