Chapter Six

Aaron

When it’s technically late into the night, even though it doesn’t matter underground, Aaron finds himself sitting up in bed, stewing. Valerie is off somewhere and he’s stuck alone with an avalanche of thoughts crashing through his mind. He can hardly take it, and there’s no way to shut it off. She should be in bed by now. It’s well past eleven, and it’s a work night.

He was almost ready to open up to her about what he’s going through, but not anymore. He’s too pissed off for that. She’d make it sound like he’s expecting her to be his mom, and then he’d throw it back in her face. Nothing good will come of it, that’s for sure.

He’ll do what he always does, keep trudging along, quietly, pretending everything is ok while he figures it out on his own. He has all the time in the world, might as well get used to it. When he hears someone coming down the grate steel catwalk outside, he turns over on his side a little, so it doesn’t look like he’s been waiting up all night, to accost her when she walks through the door. Whoever it is, they keep going. It’s not her.

He starts to consider bringing his problem up with Gabriel, but he there’s just no way he’ll be able to trust him now, not after the shit Vaun and Sy said earlier. If anything, he should kill the man before he regrets not doing it. He’s sure there’ll be a day he wishes he had. He sighs, and slumps down against the headboard a little more. The best thing he can do right now is not do anything. It’s the only way to stop himself from being rash and doing something stupid.

For now, he’ll keep playing the SSS game. Whatever they tell him to do, he’ll do it. Even if it takes a lifetime, one day, Sy will be gone and they will eventually amass enough money to take care of themselves. With help from Five, Valerie will be able to figure out how all of their artificial systems work, and they’ll be free. Soon enough, they won’t need Gabriel anymore, they’ll be able to kill him, and move on with their lives. Unsettlingly, that puts him at ease, and he feels better.

Among his other trains of thought, he thinks about how all the others are doing, like Five. As it turns out, she’s becoming quite the little scientist. Some things have started to worry him though. She’s become quite manipulative as well. He doesn’t know if it’s something she’s picked up from some of the others, or if it’s a deeply rooted trait that was seeded back at Werker.

He kind of regrets telling her about the effect beauty has on men, among other things. She knows exactly what she can get away with and has honed the use of her appearance to a sharp edge, especially against Gabriel. She began working on him from the start. She deprecates the pitiful man for all his deeds against her, and lures secrets from him as repayment, all while letting him believe the two of them are closer for it.

He knows damn well she’s over what he helped Paul and Barry do to her, but she still uses it against him every moment it can suit a purpose. There’s no argument that what they did can never be washed away with any kind of penance, but the way she wields guilt is concerning. As long as she’s wringing every bit of information out of him as she can, the end will probably justify the means. She has become Gabriel’s literal shadow, permanently memorizing everything he knows. Lately, the two have started developing a process for salvaging SSS guards in case they fall in the line of duty. They’ve even posted a consent signup sheet down on the training floor.

Marek has been given the job of his dreams. He spends nearly night and day in the machine shop, perfecting Sy’s fighting robot. It turns out he knows a hell of a lot about robots, for a being a rat. When he’s not in the shop, he’s following Alexis around like a lost puppy. Everyone pokes a little fun at him for it, but they all know true love when they see it. Unexpectedly, the rest of the guards as a whole have shown the dignity to give them their space. Even though half of them look like scallywags, not a one has tried to make moves on her. He has a lot of respect for them because of that.

Having grown up quite adverse to men in general, she has very slowly started to let him get closer to him. She’s also become quite involved in her training, almost as much as himself. After living on the streets her entire life, she’s putting forth as much effort as possible to earn her place at SSS. She’s set staying for the rest of her life, and equals even Sy in her loyalty to the place. SSS is her home now, and she’s really setting the example.

She’s already won the respect of every one of the guards, Vaun included. Even though she was already genetically predisposed to be heavily muscled, she had never actually done any weight training before ending up here. Now that she’s been putting her time in on the equipment, she’s becoming a living legend.

He didn’t see it himself, but apparently a few of the skeptical men have learned some embarrassing lessons of her tenacity. When she got cocky herself though, Vaun helped her understand that in their line of work, there is no place for fun and games. As wild as she is, Vaun is a whole other animal altogether. His usual demeanor is quite modest compared to when he enters the ring.

He smirks when he thinks about training with Arma. She’s always in such good spirits when she gets to pal around with him. He doesn’t get to spend much time with any of the others either, but they don’t seem to miss him like she does. As little as anyone else will trust her, he has come to feel that she is his purest friend of them all. She may be, what some would call undomesticated, and certainly willful, but she is in no way malicious. She still despises people, and refuses to acknowledge that she was once human. She prides herself on being a robot, and above the shitty basic nature of people.

The first time the two of them went downstairs to mess around in the weight room, not many of the guards were impressed. As if he were supposed to have some kind of cliché super robot strength, some had even scoffed when he couldn’t push any more than five hundred pounds off his chest. They did shut up though, when he took four hundred past fifteen reps. He could’ve probably kept going until his battery ran out, but there’d be no point. Arma was mostly on par with Alexis in her lifts, even though she’s twice her size. Both idolize one another, so it ended up with both of them being quite proud of themselves.

It’s another story altogether when anyone tries sparring with him or Arma. Even Alexis is no match for her, despite Arma having almost no skills in fighting. With her mechanical endurance, she can wear down even the strongest of fighters. For the most part, she is cautious, and unexpectedly gentle, up until she is not. As soon as anyone tries to get rough with her, they quickly realize that she can hurt them much more easily than they can her. She teases them that they will get in trouble if they damage her expensive skin, flaunting the fact that she is the finest figure to have ever been created by the famous Evan Adams of AMF.

Most surprisingly, Mikel has found himself a well-received spot amongst the guards. He has been taken in by the small clique of armory specialists, delving his time into gunsmithing and tailored munitions. Rather than getting carried away with much physical training, he has taken to marksmanship. He was bitten by the gun bug from the first day he was handed the standard rifle.

While he himself has already outshined everyone, including Vaun, on the range, they tell him it doesn’t count, because he’s a robot. The pretty much use that excuse every time he becomes the best at anything though. He’s noticed it’s kind of had an effect on Arma though. She doesn’t seem to want to bother doing any training if everyone is going to brush her efforts off like that too.

What he finds most strange, is Sy’s lack of command over her. There was a short lived rumor that he had a thing for her, and that’s why she was getting away with it, but it proved to be far from the truth. Somehow. He hasn’t been able to find a way to reign her in. He has no leverage against her like he does everyone else. The rumor now, is that he’s actually afraid of her.

Apparently, during her review yesterday, she ended up sticking a dagger into the top of his desk. He’s pretty sure he saw the mark. It has to be what Sy was covering up with the ashtray. He smiles, wishing he could’ve seen what happened. It’s strange that he’d hide it from him like that too, or hide it at all. She’s got his number for sure.

Valerie said that from now on, Sy will only speak with Arma while she or Five is also present. She suspects that she still has deeply rooted trust issues with people. Apparently, Sy wouldn’t say what was said between them, so the screw up must’ve been on his end. He imagines something along the lines of Sy threatening to cast the punishments of her deliberately contrary attitude over onto Five. That would do it.

At first, she had actually started wearing SSS uniforms, to fit in like everyone else, but one day, it simply stopped. It probably started to make her feel too human. She’ll still wear boots and tactical gear when told, but only because they have a functionally purpose.

Sometimes, she might even wear things recreationally, but never to cover herself. She loves to tout her elegance, not shamelessly, but in a way that elevates herself above the lower-base animalistic natures of everyone else. The last time she wore her gun holsters and nothing else, Sy nearly had to have her dragged back to her room by force after someone walked right into him while gawking at her.

Today, she’s wearing her issued duty boots, black pants, and tactical vest. The thing is completely unzipped in the front though. It’s when she’s partially covered that makes her the most enticing. What he finds to be strange about her, and especially Five, is that no matter how strong the bond is between the two, they don’t seem to really have any sway over each other’s ways. Five never picks up any of Arma’s wild side, and Arma never picks up any of Five’s sweetness.

Whenever Five isn’t in the lab, the two are holed up in their little apartment. A few times, he’s gone to join them, to see what they’re really up to. They are plenty happy to have his company, but he still gets the feeling that he’s interrupting if he does. They’re not any quieter when he comes around, but they kind of look at him as if he has something on his face. It’s better when its only one of them at a time. He sees Arma more often, but it feels like he can talk to Five about deeper stuff more confidently.

Though his loyalties will always start and end with Valerie above anyone else, he’s finding himself befriending Gabriel often enough. She’d be pissed if she ever caught him. He doesn’t care. It’s not like she’s been spending any of her time with him either anyway. Whenever he shows up to say hi to her in the lab, she comes up with a reason to disappear and awkwardly leave him behind with Gabriel. As far as his own life is concerned, and its dependence on the process, Gabriel might as well be as good as blood.

When Valerie isn’t actively working on pulling the rug out from under Gabriel, she’s spending the rest of her time with her sister Clarice. He doesn’t know if it’s on purpose, but her avoidance is really starting to feel like it is. When he does happen to find time with her, she tells him she’s had a long day and just wants some quiet time. It’s that line, or some other canned bullshit. He wishes she’d just come out and tell him what her deal is.

For being a robot psychologist, she sure does a shitty job of communicating with him. Lately, he’s had to resort to not sleeping in their bed, for her sake. If she knows he’s there, waiting for her, she’ll stay up really late drinking. When she does finally come to bed, she immediately passes out. None of them can have her slipping at work because of this, so instead, he will sometimes hang out in the bar late at night, knowing she won’t show up if he’s there.

Her constant avoidance is really starting to take its toll on him though. His mind is always overclocking. Even though he doesn’t say anything about it to her, or burden her with any of his problems, simply having her around makes him feel like he’s going to be alright. He can’t tell her that either, or she’ll get annoyed that he’s being weird and clingy. All he has left anymore is his training.

Everything that once made him human, is continuing to slip away. Sometimes he thinks about taking the money he’s saved up, going back to his old job, and living alone in an apartment again. He could go back to taking his walks, go out to the woods every weekend, or do anything else but all of this. It might not last long, but even a short stint of peace might be worth it. No one would even know. It’s not like he even worked with any real people anyway.

He rarely visits his and Valerie’s living quarters anymore. Without her, the only thing that makes it a home is that stupid alarm clock from his old apartment, and his old backpack under the bed. Now, he merely finds wherever is dark, quiet, and has a plugin to hunker down near.

While he waits outside the apartment door, standing at the grate balcony tailing, he watches one of the massive floor platforms slowly raising up the far concrete wall. One of the small shuttles is being lifted to the main hanger, where it’ll be trucked off for tomorrow’s mission.

When the platform elevator clunks into its place in the ceiling, there’s nothing more to see, so he marches off down to the machine shop. No one should be in there this late, unless Marek has passed out at the computer again. Every time he passes by a camera on his way down the hallways, he wonders if Sy or Vaun are watching him.

As soon as he enters the shop, he notices his Runner parked in the middle of the floor. It should be up in the main hanger, where he parked it. It pisses him off that someone has been messing with it without his permission. They tossed his old canvas tarp too, and put some kind of stupid new stretchy black one on it. He liked his old tarp.

Something else suddenly catches his eye. Its feet have been painted white! He rushes over to it and angrily rips the cover right off of it. The whole big cat-like robot has been completely repainted in a flashy red and white paintjob. It looks brand new, and exotic, but it’s no trail riding machine anymore.

After standing there fretting, with his hands in his hair, he figures out what’s actually going on. The paint isn’t the only thing different about the machine. He can’t quite believe it, but the runner in front of him isn’t even his. It’s a completely different machine, but someone has duplicated the same mods he did to his.

He walks around the thing, inspecting its rather nice matte white and glossy red color scheme. He can’t believe anyone was able to find another one, let alone in this kind of condition. It has to have been a crime seizure. No one else would’ve tricked it out like this. Seeing another one is pretty exciting. He’d never have thought he made such an impression on anyone with his. He can’t even fathom who wanted one so bad, other than maybe Five, but she could never have kept it a secret from him like this. He covers the thing back up and even pats it on the shoulder, quite happy with it. It brings back the same excitement he felt the day he went out and bought the one he has.

When he finally settles down in the small dark tool-room in the back of the shop, he sits down on the concrete floor and leans against one of the big steel cabinets. After having made a little bit of progress the last time he tried meditation, he’s been waiting to give it another shot. Trying to quiet that constant feeling of rage is not only what he needs, but something he has to work out. It’s going to end up becoming dangerous if it goes unchecked for much longer. He’s been warned about his little outbursts enough times already. Even Vaun is starting to look wary around him, and that means everyone else must really be on edge.

Sy keeps telling him that when he’s ready, they’ll send him along on some of the shuttle missions with the other guards. He thinks about it constantly, wondering what it’ll be like. Having that to look forward to makes up for a lot. A single goal is often all he needs to keep him going, no matter how tough things are.

It felt awkward asking Five for advice about how to live with himself, now that he’s a machine. It’s all old-hat for her and Arma by now. For them, it was Valerie that guided them through all their difficulties. But, things are different with him. They didn’t know the difference like he does. It’s what they started with.

Thinking of Five makes him remember how embarrassed he felt when he learned that she was human, and not an AI. When he first discovered her, he’d gotten his hopes up that she was the real deal. She was supposed to be the one to take humanity to the next level. Having explained the intricacies of what makes people tick makes him cringe to think about now.

When he closes his eyes, he takes himself back to his trail in the forest where he would always go. He can rebuild it from his memories the same as it always was. He doesn’t take to trudging up the same old path this time though. All he wants to do is sit on the rock in the middle of the pool, under the spray of the falls. There is no darkness coming for him there. He remembers every detail, the black pea-gravel floor of the pool, the soft loamy dirt, and how everything is covered in ferns and moss. Everything is nice and dim under the evergreen canopy, just the way he likes it.

Whenever his mind tries to race off in another direction, he forces it to bog down on fabricating the most intricate details of the place. It makes him smile to remember what the mist smelled like. He was worried such a thing would forever be lost to him. The water is cold again, difficult to bare on his human skin, but not to be missed.