Esther

I jumped into a different part of space and jumped again. It was similar how the shipped jumped through F.T.L., but faster. It only took a thought and I was there. The Awakened One had been teaching me after I asked him how he could get around in space so easily.

I was surrounded by familiar constellations. I was here. The Lion of Judah Research Station. My heart spasmed for many reasons and I double checked that my pink light was still tethered to my body. I didn't want to face what was in the station so instead I looked around space for signs of pink and red spirits.

Knowing that Vai had survived when he was dead - I had to come back and check. I couldn't stand the thought that my parents and little brother were just drifting out there somewhere. I searched outside the station, but didn't see any traces of spirits - my family or otherwise.

There was one place left to look. I didn't want to. I didn't want to go back to the place I once called home. There were happy memories, sad memories and horror. But I had to know. I had to know if my family still existed in some form. They shouldn't be alone.

I let my pink spirit drift inside the station. I was prepared for dead bodies. There wasn't any. Had El sent someone to clean up when she found out about me? Or had it been the miasmids?

I wasn't in my physical body to touch the nearest terminal, but I centered my pink power and used the power as if it were a finger. Usually when I used my light, I used it as a weapon of force. That was easy. It was more difficult to focus it into a smaller point. I played back the station logs until I found what I wanted. It was close to the day of the attack. The bodies were strewn all about on the playback - including the first Awakened One's. He was near the docking bay where he stood his ground and held the miasmids back to let me escape with the light.

My parents were there. Together. Near my aunts and uncles. All dead. My little brother was further back. He died in front of my younger cousins trying to protect them. They were all dead behind him.

I was connected enough to my body that I felt it when tears spilled from my closed eyes onto my cheeks. It was a strange sensation as it wasn't quite a physical sensation. I hurt. My spirit hurt.

On the playback, a small group of people came to the station. They took the bodies and burned them together - including the Awakened One. Pink glinted from their eyes. Then they left and the station was unattended all this time.

I focused my power one last time to shut off the terminal. My spirit drifted to the spot on the playback where they had burned the bodies.

"I'm sorry," I said to my family and friends. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay behind and be with you. Forgive me. I took the light to the Gathering. I've meet great people who have become a second family. It would be great if I could introduce you to them. Especially Owen. You would really like Owen." I said that last part specifically to my brother, Levi. "Owen always believed in me."

It was probably my wishful thinking, but I felt them. For a brief moment, I felt them with me. It was warm and nice. And fleeting. There was no visual sign of their spirit forms.

"The Gathering will win war against the Corruption. I promise we will. Your deaths are not in vain. The entire G.E.F. now have the light and we are opening it in colonies. Are you here with me? Please don't be out there wandering aimless. Please be in a place of peace. If you are watching over me, I hope you are proud of me. I'm trying my best. I have a foster brother now. He's older, Levi, so you don't have to worry about him taking your place. No one will ever take your places. But it's nice not being alone. I was alone for too long.

"I should go back. The fleet will be at Minidtin tomorrow. My friend, my sister, Minmin, is especially looking forward to it. She had her birthday a few days ago and is now officially an adult. She's exchanged a few messages with her idol, Bars. She's been ecstatic which is nice to see after she lost both her parents to the Corruption. Her mother died because she refused to let the Corruption control her. Her father is with the Corruption. So is my foster father for that matter. I've never met him. Shel tells me he was different though before the Corruption took him.

"And one of my friends can do the most amazing thing. He can heal people from the Corruption permanently. It is his light's power. A few people we have opened the light in can heal too, but none except Vai have been able to see the Corruption inside people, force them out and then heal the people. It gives me hope that Minmin and Shel will get their fathers back.

"I've spoken too long. Said more than I intended. I need to go back."

I turned away from the ashes, but paused. "I love you all." And then I blinked away back to my body.

My spirit self squealed in surprise when I saw Vai's green spirit near my body. I had left my body sitting next to the window in mine and Minmin's room.

"I didn't mean to startle you," he said.

"It's okay," I replied. "I just wasn't expecting to see you here."

There was a moment of silence while I wondered why he was there.

"They aren't out there," he finally said.

"Who?"

"Your family. It's not the first time you've gone out to look for their spirits."

Why did all my friends have an uncanny way of seeing through me?

"You were there," I said.

"I'm different," he said and there was sadness in his voice that I didn't understand.

"Why are you different? Why can't their spirits be there too? What if we are all wrong and when we die we don't go anywhere? We just drift - lost. In pain."

"But they weren't there were they?"

"No," I said.

"I'm a clone, Esther," Vai said. "My spirit is not mine."

I wanted to refute him, but he continued on.

"The real Vai Ma'amaloa is with the real Langi Ma'amaloa. Together. Waiting for my father to join them. My spirit was divided and put into many different clones before my dad rejoined them and put them in me. My spirit has been in and out of bodies - in and out of the Laumalie preserver many times. I've spoken with my dad about it. We've spoken several times about it actually. We both agree. My spirit is used to being outside my body - switching bodies. That is why I am different. My spirit survived outside myself because it was already used to doing so. Don't go looking for your family anymore, Esther. They are where they are supposed to be. And your new family needs you. Shel and Minmin. And me. And Owen."

It might have been my imagination or my silly hope, but I thought he emphasized Owen a little differently than the others. I nodded. "Thank you, Vai. You didn't need to come to me and explain why you are different. Honestly, I know I should be relieved that my family isn't out there, and for the most part I am, but a small part of me wanted to see them again."

Vai nodded. "I know that feeling all too well. Rest now. Move forward and help us destroy the Corruption. None of this would have been possible without you."

His green spirit smiled kindly at me and then he was gone. I highly doubted I would ever go back to the Lion of Judah research station. I said goodbye to my family and that was enough for me. Vai was right. It was time to stop looking back. Time to stop the Corruption.