Now, dear reader, that we've journeyed a long way together, let us summarize Seth's remarkable achievements thus far:

- Punched a Town Elder

- Left his home village

- Did not kill a goblin

- Skipped fighting fifty wolves

- Went sightseeing in the 'sewers'

- Got bathtub-water from a king

- Stepped on some spiders

- Managed to stop an evil wizard within minutes

- Becomes increasingly too weak to survive, as he progresses to places he isn't ready for

Yet, some people still claim this story is awesome.

Oh, and he killed a dusty grandma, completely obliterating the illusion that he is a good hero. And from here on the story continues!

Seth just got rid off some pesky heroes who would've almost certainly ruined his breakfast the next day, as well as all other future breakfasts. These heroes named Seth an evil wizard, which would have hurt his hero status if not for Seth's quick decisive action to kill both of them; which is one way to deal with false rumours. Seth who is still accompanied by the late, and returned, Twig, decides that it is perhaps better to take refuge somewhere other than the castle in the City of... What? They consider the Swordery of Yuna at first, but they quickly conclude that being surrounded by swords, and people who can use those swords to kill them in their sleep, wouldn't be the most cunning of all possible options. They follow the forest and riverside a few miles west before something strange and mysterious happens!

Seth: We have been walking for hours, I am getting tired Twig.

Twig: It's only a couple of miles more. A couple of random encounters would've been nice though.

Seth: Random encounters?

Twig: You know... those things heroes get while walking. Some strange man handing them something useful, or some monsters to kill, or some clues for a mini quest perhaps?

Seth: That sounds rather dull. Would that not get predictable over time?

Twig: Well it seems that as long as it happens a couple of hundred times, other heroes don't seem to mind as much though.

Seth: I blame Stockholm syndrome for that. Heroes probably start loving it, like those heroes earlier with their long lists of stuff to kill. I imagine I would have become just like them if I had accepted the first quest from that lady at the entrance to the City of... What?

Twig: What was that quest though?

Seth: I cannot remember. It was dull.

Twig: Meh.

Seth: Perhaps we are not getting any random encounters because you are around?

Twig: What do you mean? Haven't we had several random encounters?

Seth: Like what?

Twig: Like... Those heroes?

Seth: Do heroes even count as random encounters? Heroes meeting other heroes is not really random... And they would not give each other quests?

Twig: What about the Grandma? Or the wolves? ... Or the guards?

Seth: Maybe that old granny getting lost was just a fluke? I cannot imagine hundreds of old grannies appearing in random encounters to all the heroes that we have seen. And I did not kill any wolves, remember? And the guards... Well, they fought each other!

Twig: Richard? Not to mention the spiders?

Seth: Richard? But we never had a fight! And those spiders were not random, they were part of the quest to vanquish the Evil Wizard in the Evil Tower on the Evil Mountain that may or may not be Evil... Maybe you are the random encounter I have got to deal with before I can receive another?

Twig: Are you thinking of killing me Seth?

Seth: No, no, not at all. Just make sure you do not anger me in the future though... I found a few insults in some of my books that will depress you to the bone, and make you suffer a lot more than those heroes back there did. So I can always use that if you like instead?

Twig: Sometimes you really are scary Seth...

Seth: I am practicing my villain skills. Those heroes got me thinking... What if I can only become a Mage if I turn evil? I am not very good at it though.

Twig: Considering how dark you just were and how much you just creeped me out, what makes you think you wouldn't be good at it?

Seth: Well, I do not get the appeal of being evil. I mean... you can kill everyone and anything around you for poops and giggles. Just doing bad things for the sake of status without ulterior motives that makes the risk of being vilified and being slayed by heroes worth it. I cannot seem to grasp the mindset.

Twig: Alittletenyearoldboysaidwhat?

Seth: What?

Twig: Exactly, now just stay out of your head for a while and look around you. Strange things are afoot.

Seth: I do not understand?

Twig: Good, that's how you should be at that age. Now prepare to be amazed.

Seth: But... AH!

Indeed! Twig is completely right. Everything around them starts to change drastically!

Twig: Seth, this is normal. Winter... is coming.

Seth: I have never seen this before in my life!

Twig: Nah, they skip the small boring villages, but the winter does change the forest and the City of... What? I guess they think the small towns aren't worth seeing.

Seth: Who are they?

Twig: Dunno... Weather Gods perhaps?

Seth: Are there any Magic Gods?

Twig: Don't keep your hopes up on that one.

Seth: Aw bullocks.

Ahem! Yes! Everything is changing around them. Small bushes suddenly become a darker variant, and a few seconds later there is snow on them. Tree leaves disappear and all the branches and twigs are covered in snow within minutes. Suddenly some deer spawn next to them. The bucks with huge antlers and the does with... red and white scarves? Not really natural, but it fits into the scene. The horizon changes as well; nightfall turns into a beautiful sunrise instantly where the sky is a little pink, slowly transitioning to a blue hue.

Seth: Beautiful.

Twig: Yes it is... I remember watching this with my old girlfriend.

Seth: You had a girlfriend?

Twig: Yes, have I never told you about that? She was called Leaf.

Seth: That figures...

Twig: Hey, goblins aren't really good at making up names ok!

Seth: Sorry, I meant no offence.

Twig: Some taken.

Seth: Well... excuse me?

Twig: No, that would mean you would walk away from me this instant right?

Seth: Ok, ok. Please act like a grown up and tell me about Leaf?

Twig: Leaf was a beautiful goblin girl. We met each other at a bar-

Seth: The same bar where-

Twig: Yes, yes. The same bar where I met Jimmy and the Balancing Staff. Stop interrupting me. She was a barmaid there, and we started talking. She was always fascinated by birds; so around this time we would sometimes see birds appearing or disappearing, depending on what type of birds they were. Some would actually change from one type into another mid-air! This place by the river was our secret spot.

Seth: I see. So where is she now?

Twig: Right there!

Seth: You timed this. You must have.

Twig: Mayyybe...

Perhaps it is a mere coincidence, perhaps not, but right in front of them out of the blue a huge building appears out of nowhere. Suddenly the quiet sounds of the river are overwhelmed by a huge amount of wings flapping through the sky. Hundreds, perhaps thousands, of pigeons emerge out of thin air, departing from the big building. Seth sees that some pigeons have small pieces of paper on their feet; a message system, he thought. When he looks closer, he also sees some pigeons with standard messages like "I love you" tattoo'd on their feathers. Some carry small packages with ink and quills, apparently for the receiver to use to reply, and he even sees some small flocks of pigeons carrying a few typewriters across the sky.

Seth: Amazing.

Twig: Heh... you should see them carrying the machines that print newspapers.

Seth: ... My head hurts.

Twig: That's the toll of taking a gallon of bird excrement without a poo deflecting umbrella. Let's head inside quickly.

Once inside they see hundreds, no, thousands of bird houses covering all of the walls around them. Even the counters, the tables, the chairs are all made of bird houses. Not a single square inch seems to be unused in some way.

Seth: Hmm I wonder where the paper comes from...

Twig: Funny story actually. She mixes the bird poo with the twigs from the forests that the birds bring her. See those plateaus up there?

Seth: Yes?

Twig: Well, when enough pigeons sit on it, the plateaus circle around each other and create a screw-twirl movement. Then it grinds down all the bird poo and twigs together into fine paper maché for everyone to enjoy writing on!

Seth: Woah... That is awesome!

Twig: Yes it is. And look over there!

Seth: The creature covered in twigs?

Twig: That's my wife!

Seth: Wait... what!? You said you were not married a few chapters ago.

Twig: Well... It's because our relationship is... complicated.

Seth: You really want my brain to start activating again?

Twig: Go ahead.

Seth: All right, allow me to ponder upon the upcoming explanatory endorsements.

Twig: Nevermind.

Seth: That is what you required of me right?

Twig: Meh, let me try to explain; Leaf always wanted to raise pigeons, but the market was apparently bad in other seasons. Heroes can message each other instantaneously, so there was no real need for a Pigeonary. Also, she preferred to stay young as long as possible, and to be honest... I don't mind it that much.

Seth: So, that is the opposite of me then. I would love for people to stop looking at me like I am just a small, unknowing kid. I prefer to be looked at as a small, knowing kid.

Twig: I see. How you continue to amaze me... So, Leaf figured it was best to just be alive one season of the year. That's why she set up a winter-themed shop so that the world would flicker her out in spring and add her back whenever the winter theme comes out and people start to feel nostalgic enough to send out mail by pigeon.

Seth: Awesome!

Leaf: And awesome is my middle name. Hiii Twiggy, how have you been in the last nine months? It's as if I saw you yesterday.

Twig: It loses it's wit after using it two hundred times too many sweetey, but I don't love you less for it.

Leaf: Aww, I love you too. By the way, have a big, pink blanket to keep you warm, Twig's friend. I will work in the background for a while. Feel free to have a look around this place, you're safe here.

Twig and Leaf take their sweet time to... reacquaint, so Seth spends his time walking around the Pigeonary. He notices there is much more to it than at first glance; in the back, there is a "Hero Point" shop. Well, that's what the sign says at least. Seth vaguely remembers that Twig said something about it. Looking around some more, he sees a Swordery? "That can't be good", he thinks to himself and draws his wand, charging at the door. It is a critical hit! To both the door, and his shoulder.

Seth: Dieeouch!

The pain causes Seth to go momentarily blind.

Mysterious Voice: What's this all about? What have you done to my door? And why do you have a pink blanket on. Aren't you a guy?

Seth: My head hurts.

Mysterious Voice: Yeah I can see that. Here have a healing potion.

Seth: Thanks.

Mysterious Voice: So, the breaking in part?

Seth: I want you to stop this shop. You are ruining the business of... of...

Mysterious Voice: Of...?

Seth: My...

Mysterious Voice: Future remarried wife?

Seth: Huh? Wait... Yuna?

Yuna: Aww you figured me out. Hi Seth, you missed me huh?

Seth: No, no. Of course I did not!

Yuna: You're blushing, so sweet!

Seth: Argh! Ok, I surrender.

Yuna: Good. I missed you too.

Seth: Thanks, sorry for my... falling in. It was just... I really want you to be able to repay your drinking debt.

Yuna: So we can be together again?

Seth's head turns red.

Seth: Maybe... But that is something for the future me to think about? I mean... You are still in debt right?

Yuna: Yes. So that still keeps us apart?

Seth: Well... You did drink all the lemonade in Bathvil when I was thirsty...

Yuna: I know... I told you a thousand times I was sorry about that. But I'm feeling better now!

Seth: Let us just... Let me adventure some more still. I will come back to you eventually. You are the only one I have fancied anyway.

Yuna: That's... a relief. Thanks Seth.

Seth: You are welcome. So why are you here then?

Yuna: I've done some networking. I figured since you just befriended goblins like it was nothing, why can't I? There's a huge market apparently with sending swords via mail. Perhaps I'll even make people bid on weapons, and the highest bidder wins!

Seth: Oh, that is a great idea. Then you just force heroes to use their greed and thirst for competition!

Yuna: Please don't say the word thirst. You know what kind of power that has over me. Even today still...

Seth: Sorry. I will try to rip that word out of my vocabulary for the time being, but that is a great idea! Perhaps you could even make people offer their own stuff for money, and charge like 5% of the price they try to get for their stuff! Then you make money while you sleep!

Yuna: Yeah, I could do that! But let's see how this goes first. I mean.. It takes a lot of pigeons to even get a typewriter to a person, imagine a suit of armor...

Seth: So will you stay here for the time being? I see you have upgraded your Shed.

In the background of Yuna's HUGE shop is the good old wooden sword shed, made of wooden swords. Though this time there was a bigger shed next to it made of iron swords.

Yuna: Yeah... I'm improving in my skills as well; I might even pick up armor smithing. The furnace here is bird poo-powered and there's an unlimited supply, so I can start on working bigger pieces of metal. Also, I have a present for you...

Seth: Another present? The wand already was enough. I still have not been able to cast spells yet. Though I feel I am ever getting closer.

Yuna: What did Richard's scroll do then?

Seth: It gave me this bracelet. It turns into a bat in combat that steals life from my enemies.

Yuna: That's... Flippin awesome!

Seth: I know right? It was a very dark time in my past when I used it though.

Twig: That was about twenty minutes ago.

Seth: Still the past.

Twig: Meh.

Leaf: So I see you've met Yuna then?

Seth: Yeah, she is my ex wife though.

Leaf: Oh, isn't that wonderful.

Twig: It really isn't usually with ex wives right?

Seth: Well, our circumstance is... special. We are both working towards being together again in the future.

Yuna: That's how we feel right now anyway.

Twig: Well then, Seth. Let's stay here for a while. Wanna see the hero point shop?

Seth: Sure! It will be fun!

Twig: I'd say. Let's walk to that place right away!

Meanwhile at the Castle.

Queen Eve: See? And that's how you make sure only the pretty people walk outside in your kingdom.

King Lacial: FAMINE?! Why not just give them dental?

Queen Eve: Of course not silly, dentists are too expensive! I did, however, bring the best dentist in the world with me to make your teeth as white as can be of course.

King Lacial: Please no.

Poor King Lacial. I mean... the townspeople. Yeah... Poor townspeople...

Back to Seth and Twig.

Twig: See? Here we are.

Seth: That sure was a short walk.

Twig: Yup, but there's plenty you can do in seconds.

Seth: Like what?

Twig: I dunno.. Intermissions perhaps?

Seth: Err...

Twig: So yeah... Here we are!

The hero point shop is a lot smaller than Yuna's Iron Sword-shed, or even the Swordery. There is a lot of creepy stuff around, and it seems that all of it is meant to be used to kill humans... While scanning around, Seth see things like extra sharp hoofs, strong metallic antlers, and titanium teeth? Seth shivers.

Seth: So all this stuff is obtained by killing off heroes? That is quite gruesome.

Twig: Yeah, it helps out a lot to survive... and to kill. Look, here are the bolts I used. I get 10 points per hero-level from the hero I kill. The bolts are 500 points each, so that hero wasn't worth the points. It was very satisfying though!

Seth: It would just be overpowered if you indefinitely gained enough points to keep buying them though.

Twig: I guess that's true. They're useful in a pinch.

Seth: A pinch of revenge that is.

Twig: Hehe...

Moving further into the shop, they see all kinds of more deadly things: Cobweb armors (Seth: Hey! Was that not harvested from the granny I killed? | Twig: Ssh, narrating going on), extended claws, all kinds of decorative evil-looking stuff, ooze-coating, and there was a pit full of magma; probably to decorate dungeons or something. They stop walking when they stand exactly in front of the shopkeeper.

Twig: Can I see my hero points, please?

Shopkeeper: Sure, here's a chart. Would you like to check yours as well, Sir?

Seth: Huh?

Twig: Cool, I got 1733 points left! I could go with either more cute eyes, cat ears, panda scarf, or perhaps even that cobweb armor!

Shopkeeper: That cobweb armor price has doubled though. Not too many people killing grannies these days.

Seth: Sorry, I did... not kill enough of them?

Shopkeeper: Meh, not your fault. Here's your point chart.

Twig: Huh?

Seth: Woahh... 520 points? How on earth did I receive that?

Twig: What the..

Seth: But... But...

As of this moment, Seth's brain starts to work full time. It takes a few minutes before he manages to talk and move again. Even though Twig kept stepping on his toes and screamed in his ears in the meantime. The shopkeeper joined for the fun of it.

Seth: All right so... I seem to travel a lesser walked path, I have been able to evade almost all life threatening events other than that I got a goblin for an ally, averted almost all of the quests King Lacial forced upon me, and I seem to be able to kill off other heroes for points. What does that make me Twig?

Twig: An NPC perhaps?

Seth: What is an NPC?

Twig: A non-playing character. They're the worst of all people around here.

Shopkeeper: Hey...

Twig: Utterly useless, living a completely boring life, constantly doing the same things, saying the same words over and over again.

Shopkeeper: Hey!

Twig: Aimlessly walking around the world, minding ' their own business', filling up the void heroes feel in their social lives; even though they blink in and out of existence all the time.

Shopkeeper: I've got feelings you know...

The shopkeeper walks to the corner of the store to sob in peace.

Twig: That's also something though, you should vanish out of existence from time to time if you were a hero. But... You haven't yet, right?

Seth: Err... Not that I know of.

Twig: Or maybe you're one of those entities like Balancing Staff, that have taken shape in the form of Seth the mage, a fictional roleplaying character in their own world?

Seth: Stop saying stuff that do not make sense to me! How did I get those points then?

Twig: Well, that's less of a mystery perhaps. You see, it could be that the dwarves you didn't kill are sharpening their axes in celebration of you.

Seth: Is that even possible?

Twig: Or Richard...

Seth: I do not even know how you came to that conclusion, but it will make sense when it does. There are those other two people I killed though... And perhaps those people who disappeared on the couch counted as well?

Twig: I doubt it.

Seth: So... What am I?

Seth: Shoot! I forgot to ask Yuna about that present!