There was the striking scent of human throughout the entire cabin. I remembered it well as soon as I stepped inside, but it still stirred old feelings inside of me. Something primal told me to just jump him whenever his back was turned and be done with it, but it wouldn’t cure the hunger in my stomach. The meat he gave was close, but the charred portions had lost their juice and tasted like ash to me. I wonder if I might have thought it was good if I were still alive.

Either way, he treated me with a level of care I hadn’t known for nearly a decade. He probably wasn’t even alive when I was turned, I can tell that much. After being treated like dirt by other clans for all this time, spending a few peaceful moments was alluring in its own right. I was fairly embarrassed by the way I acted and was dressed, but that much can’t be helped.

After having to argue with him about our similar heights, I agreed to take the smaller of the beds out of courtesy. Before I did, I took a seat by the window and pulled out the faded scrap of my mother’s last letter to me. My birth mother was a strict woman, and would often strike any rebelliousness out of me. Ironically, that only made it so I acted a lot more childish after I turned, but I still think more like her.

“Do your best to look like a proper lady, and try your hardest to survive.” The letter read in faded ink.

While I had thought it might be some vague threat when I first read it, it seems more like my mother was trying to carry me away from the house when it became infected with a vampiric plague. Unfortunately for her, the letter arrived a few days after I’d be turned by the aunt she had sent me to. The both of them had a heated argument over the whole thing, believing it was wrong for every member of the family to be made undead.

Straying from my memory, I stood up and moved towards Leo. I could tell his every muscle was relaxed, and could just barely hear the thump of his heart beneath the howling wind. I got down on my knees and brushed the hair away from his neck. It had been years since I fed on a human, I could hardly remember the taste. Feeding on deer and elk always left a small pit in my stomach, and I wanted to let loose and bite down on him, but something held me back. My tongue ran over my fangs before I flopped back onto the nearby mattress and kicked my legs in the air.

Why? I’m not scared he’s going to wake up or anything. This is the perfect opportunity to get a taste of real blood and get back to full strength. Why am I hesitating if it’s right here? I thought to myself before gazing back at the window. It’s because you might kill him, Senna. He’s been nice to you, and even gave you a place to sleep at night, and you would just drain him dry after all that hospitality. That’s not something a proper lady would do... well, neither is biting the necks of elk, but we all make compromises.

I rolled over onto my back and let out a long sigh. There was a stillness in the air that I wasn’t used to. Staring at the ceiling made me realize that it was staying in a house again, especially with a mortal nearby. When I was in the wilderness and surviving on my own, I had to struggle and wander nearly every second. Sitting around and waiting instead of hunting felt strange. Fed up with the feeling, I snuck past his bed and moved for the door.

The fireplace had only embers now, and the shutters were closed. Even this pitch black room wasn’t that difficult for me to navigate though, and I quickly made my way to the exit. When I opened the door, the wind rustled into the house and I had to step outside fast to keep the cold air from waking Leo. The gusts died down for a second and I got to appreciate how quiet everything was. Most of the animals were further in if I wanted to hunt, but something kept my feet locked in place.

An odd urge came over my body and I slinked around the side of the cabin. Once I got to where his room should be, I peered through the unblocked window back in on him. Even though he was asleep, I stayed crouching down on the ground. The distance and wall made it so I couldn’t hear his heart beat, so there was no sense of hunger in my watching.

He looks really nice in the in the darkness. I thought, resting my chin on the windowsill. Wait, what am I even talking about?

My brow furrowed, but I kept staring at him. There was an oddly pleasing feeling about seeing him without any connotation for feeding. It’s not as if I had a heart that could still race, but I only wanted to stare at him some more. After something close to half an hour, I pulled away from the glass and smacked both my cheeks.

Clear your head, Senna. I thought, pulling my knees close to my chest. You need to think of what to do next. Where do you go from here? I should leave as soon as possible, or else he might find out what I am and try to kill me. No, in fact, he probably would try and kill me.

For a good while I just sat there and thought of what there was to do. The Ainz clan rejected me, the Godwin clan was the one that killed my family outright. There was no one left to turn to, and it was clear that I didn’t have any recourse. If there was something to plan for, it certainly wasn’t something I knew about anymore. Choosing to distract myself from my misfortune, I went out for a hunt.

Ever since I moved to these woods, I’ve thinned out the larger herbivores from the food chain. They’re no match for me in the dead of night, and they’re clearly not used to creatures latching onto them from behind. It’s lucky for me, but obviously Leo and other hunters must be suffering. Still, I’m sure they’d prefer rabbit stew to being dead. After taking a larger buck for myself, I drained him dry and ripped out the section where my teeth bit into him.

Most of the night was gone by the time I found my way back to his cabin, but it still stretched on for far longer than I had thought it would. I was getting tired already and let out a small yawn when I got back to the door. Instead of heading back inside directly, I decided to take a peek through the window again to make sure he was still sound asleep. He thankfully was, but I made sure to watch a little while to double check. Satisfied with observing him, I snuck back inside of the house and moved back into the bedroom.

Before I got in bed, I crouched down near his bedside once again and looked at the nape of his neck. There was a decent amount of muscle there, and I very nearly reached out to stroke it, but restrained myself in time. He had a pleasant smell as well, though it might’ve made my stomach growl if I hadn’t just fed. Before I knew it, my head was lowering down towards him, trailing the scent of blood.

When I finally reached his neck, I closed my mouth to keep from biting it out of habit. My lips pursed from the quick movement and I ended up planting a soft kiss on his shoulder before pulling away and covering my mouth. If my blood was still warm, I’d probably have turned beet red.

To hide myself in case that woke him up, I laid down in the smaller mattress and pulled the blankets tight over my whole body. Slowly the panic died down as exhaustion took over my body, and I found myself nodding off under the blanket.

Does that count as my first kiss? I wondered, the last thought before I fell asleep.

My dreams were energetic but dark, and filled with the sensation of hunting. I gorged myself on many creatures in a vicious scramble, but during the end, a small wolf piqued my interest. Despite the thrill of the dream, something compelled me not to harm it.