I’m a 48-year-old insurance sales associate,

I was a 48-year-old insurance salesman,

Just one week I had a job, a house, a wife, two great Dane dogs, a general beautiful life but that all changed when I caught my wife cheating.

Let me tell you something it doesn’t matter if you are a man or woman but when someone loves you like hell, give your time and energy and when you find out they lied to you be it gambling, drinking or hell any number of other things it hurts…………… it hurts that the person who was putting in the work………but alas one person can only drag the relationship for so long. At least that is how I feel about the whole affair leaving my job as a data analyst joining my wife father’s company as an insurance salesman, just to get better hours to be with her, well that’s a lie I was fired from my last job because according to my supervisor I misplaced a crucial data sheet that cost the company a ton of money, but anyway.

Looking back sometimes I feel it was my fault our relationship fell apart.

But I’m unable to guess my fault, having the feeling she is being shady without knowing, will tear you apart, but finding out you were right especially the way I did will like it was as if someone kicked you in the balls repeatedly at least that's how felt.

If I had a best friend hell even a single friend, they would tell me to get revenge to hire a Private Investigator to get proof but I just wanted out, I just wanted to leave.

Well, here I’m now standing In front of my car holding the heaviest cardboard box in my opinion in my hands thank God for Raquel who helped me carry this box from my former office to the parking complex what in world did she eat for her to be this strong, the great She-Hulk wife of my half-brother………..well my stepbrother who insisted on me calling him his half-brother, was the only one reached out to help, but my worthless pride came in the way well sometimes this worthless pride is all you have left even if your lying cheating wife can take everything in the divorce, she can’t take that.

jobless, homeless, futureless and purposeless also friendless did I mention I don't have any friends that’s how I can get along with pride, well this should be in past tense nowadays my pride is scarce whatever pride I had disappeared when I was humiliated in front of the people I had worked with 20 years well 21 come January. Funny how things turn out even when you are in the right you still get screwed over.

“Common David Wang snap out of it” I slapped myself hard on the face

If I go into self-pity I might just start crying right here instead of my car, I started moving toward the elevator, generally, I take the flights of stairs but not today not with this motherfucking cardboard box of fucking memories. AS I GOT ON THE Lift pressed the 2nd-floor button my mind took me down the dam memory lane, most of my memories are shitty, the earliest memory I have is sitting by the stairs at 4 in the morning as I watch my mother pack her things and get into the cab and drive off before my dad got home from his route as he was a truck driver, I didn't know at the time but my mother had left me and father to me it was ordinary for to leave to run some errands and get back.

I waited for 2 days for hungry because there was no food in the house until my father came back.

I remember asking him where mom was

“Sorry KIDO, but I don’t know” he had answered with compassion in his voice

To me it sounded fake in my mind it was his fault for not being there in my mind my father didn't love me or my mom, in my mind it was his fault she left and most of it was his fault that she left me, what else could you expect from a 7-year-old child who 2 days before his birthday had lost his mom.

As pops was a busy man growing up, I resented it was our Neighbor misses Shaw, and her son 1-year-old son mark took care of me don’t get me wrong they were nice people but I hated them, in my mind, it was all of them who were at fault for my mom leaving. Mrs. Shaw husband had died suddenly of cardiac arrest but I believed she poisoned in him; I hated the baby mark thinking he was an attention grabber I hated my house: the one place I didn’t hate growing was school especially the library where I got hooked on books especially fiction my favorite was count of Monte Cristo, I loved how he got revenge how he didn’t forgive and I liked to believe he got the happiness in the end that he deserved.

I used to fantasize about how I would get revenge on my father Mrs. Shaw mark all of them

That was not school was the only place I had found any happiness home was a place where I made myself and those around me miserable, in school I found friends I found a computer and I found Abigail, she was the first person to talk to me my first girlfriend and the second person to break my heart.

It wasn't anything serious we were going to different colleges and she broke up with me during the break before college started, that year my father married Mrs. Shaw or should I call her Lucy Jackson as she was my stepmom now, even at 16 I didn't believe my mom would leave me it had to the old man my father and Mrs. Shaw who drove her out and that marriage felt like the confirmation I needed that my father and Lucy Shaw or Jackson now were the ones who drove my mom away.

The first chance I got I took the furthest away university from home L'Université de Sherbrooke, University of Sherbrooke, unbeknownst to me dad had a cabin in Quebec but it didn’t matter to me in my eyes I would never see my father or step-mother or brother, I studied in college for two years it didn’t matter that my father was paying the tuition through his own pockets or that they regularly contacted me or that they were the only ones who were happy to see me; In college, I become kind of shut-in not caring about anything bunking classes failing tests and took all kinds of bad habits so let's put it this way smoking drinking were least questionable things that I did. As soon as I turned 18, I dropped out of college changed my surname to my mother Wang which I later found technically meant King went on a search for mother.

How stupidly naïve I was, believing that she would be happy to see me, believing my life was with her, boy was I in for a world of hurt I hired a P.I with the credit card dad gave me for emergencies, found her after 4 months of wait in Augusta Maine USA, then it was another 2 months before I got my passport and then I took a flight to Portland and from there to Augusta via bus there I found myself in front of a relatively big house with the bachelors I thought that too funny at the time.

I went to the door and rang the doorbell and waited quietly

I was a nervous wreck, but l was excited too.

As I waited for the door to open, I imagined a lot of scenarios but none were anywhere near the reality that took place that day, none of the signs that seem so obvious today the new name the two cars in the driveway the toys left on the front deck was visible to me that day all I could see was my mother’s face the happiness she would feel when she saw me, my mind was imagining things that weren't there but I failed to seem them for what they were.

As the door opened a white bald man appeared in front of my eyes I smiled at him hoping to show my best face,

“Good mooring,” I said chirpily

“I’m looking for Xi Wang I said or Wang Xi whichever way you prefer it”

The man looked confused at my statement

“Son, I don’t know any Wang Xi or Xi Wang you sure you got the right address,” he asked confusion apparent on his face

I was stunned momentarily before coming back to my senses. I opened my backpack and took out a pink folder from which I took out my mother’s old photo and handed it to the man

He looked at it for few moments and then suddenly shouted

“Ruby, can you come here a moment?”

“Coming dear,” came a voice from inside the house

Soon after that, the owner of the voice appeared 5-foot-tall beautiful Asian woman next to the man

The man was I shocked beyond belief she looked nothing like the woman in the photo gone was the petite black-haired black-eyed sharp chin woman instead stood there was a blue-eyed blond-haired plum woman with what I could only imagine as breast implants.

If this was his mother Than she had gone above and beyond to change her appearance

The man handed her the photo

“Do you know this woman; this young man is looking for her?” he asked

Taking the photo in one hand she immediately shook her head said “NO”

But I saw her eyes widen it was just for a second but I saw it

You know in tv series a dumb person is hit on the head in an accident or is in a life-changing situation that person's behavior completely transforms overnight it is as if God came down and gave him the gift of wisdom.

Well to me it was as if somebody knocked the air out of my lungs as I started to realize what has happened my mother left me, not because of dad, Lucy, or anyone else but she fucking wanted to, all this time I had been placing onto others but well

"FUCK!!!!!!!! " My mind screamed

I realized the things; I had done the torture I had put on my father the more I thought the more dawned on me the harder it became to breathe

“You, alright over there,” the man asked concerned

Even though I heard him I couldn't answer him

“Ruby, go and call 911, I think he is having a panic attack” he shoved my mother in and came to help me

I tried to shove him because of worthless pride I didn’t want his help but so hard to move so hard to breathe and the last thing I remember is the woman who I thought was my mother coming to the door and saying something inaudible and then I passed out.

When I opened my eyes again, I was in the hospital with my father, Lucy, and mark by the bedside Lucy and mark were asleep while my dad was on his knees praying with his head, tears formed in my eyes

I tried to speak but my mouth was so dry that couldn't, noticing the movement he turned to me

“Oh David,” He Said

He rushed towards me and hugged me and I hugged back in my mind I kept screaming I’m sorry I’m so very sorry

DING!

The elevator door open pulling me back to reality