I feel my breath stop in my throat, in the middle of an exhale. Suddenly the world around me goes out of focus. Suddenly nothing matters more than those few words and in an instant I feel like those are the most important words in the world.

"Don't play with me, Flex." I say firmly.

"You think I would play with you like that?" He laughs, happy and as shocked as myself.

"How do you know? How do you know this news isn't fake? That this ain't some kind of fucked up game they playin?" I ask, my words stumbling over each other into a jumbled mess.

I stand to my feet and walk with Trisha's phone to my room, quickly I pull out my laptop and slam it on the bed.

"Trevon told me himself. He wanted to surprise you but I don't think he knows that you're in Cali most of the time now. I saw a ticket for a 7 AM flight back to New York. You would miss him actually getting out, because they're releasing him at noon." Flex says as though he is reading this from a paper.

My finger tips crunch along the laptop keys. Flights from LAX to Laguardia and JFK are booked solid. Flex is right, the next flight isn't until 7 AM tomorrow. I close my laptop, not willing to accept this defeat.

"I'll be there in the next 6 hours." I say after a few moments.

"Trisha, wake up." I rock her soft and then heavy as I begin to lose my cool with excitement pouring through every vessel in my body.

"Wake up, wake up. We gotta go back to New York!" I say continuing to shake her.

She groans and fans me off, her head turns into the pillow and her eyes remain shut.

"Trisha!" I say, shaking her over and over.

"What?" She mumbles.

"Trevon is getting out tomorrow! He's getting out Trisha, we gotta go now!" I say laughing but tears have already begun to form at the tips of my eyes. I wipe them away quickly.

Trisha sits up on her two arms and turns towards me.

"What?" She asks squinting at me. "Tomorrow? I thought he had several more months." She says.

"Me too, but Flex just called, we gotta go." I pull her up so she is sitting at the edge of the bed and throw some clothes at her. I stuff the rest of her clothes sloppily in her bag and zip it shut.

"I need a second, Chan. I'm drunk and high." Trisha says.

"Me too, I understand. We just have to be out of here in the next 20 minutes. Can you call Remus, I don't know where my phone is." I say to her as I rush to my room to pack my own necessities. I slide out of my expensive dress and slip on sweats and a big sweater with new Adidas, the first shoes in my sight.

"Yea, Remus. Sorry to wake you up. We need a ride to the airport in the next 20 minutes." I hear Trisha speaking.

"Tell him he will be greatly compensated." I scream to her.

"She's paying you for all this, she apologizes but its kind of an emergency for her." She says nicely. You can hear that Trisha is still half asleep. Her voice is course like she has been screaming all night.

I smell my arm and my armpit, I don't stink but I reek of liquor and weed. Shit. I need to shower.

"He says he will be here in 15 minutes." Trisha speaks through my room door. As I start pulling off my clothes like a maniac, the zipper from my sweater gets stuck in my hair and as I am dragging it off, it twists into a knot.

I yell out and freeze.

Trisha chuckles and walks to me slowly. My eyes are covered by the hood of the sweater and half of my body is exposed. The cool air brushes against the top of my chest not covered by my bra. My breathing is heavy and my head takes a minute to form a headache.

I feel the warmth from Trisha's body close to mine as her hands reach from the bottom of the hoody and begin to pull the sweater up and over my head.

"What took you so long?" I question annoyed. It seems like it took her forever to walk over and help me.

"I needed you to calm down. Calm down babe. I know that you would run to New York if it was possible. I know." She speaks quietly. She carefully pulls the hoody over my head and untangles my hair from the zipper easily.

She presses her hands on top of my shoulders and stare into my eyes.

"I know you're excited but if you don't calm down you're going to hurt yourself...again." Trisha chuckles and picks a hair strand from my sweater zipper.

"Okay. Thank you. I gotta shower before Remus gets here. I smell terrible." I say.

"Go ahead. I'll pack some more stuff for you." She states getting on her knees and folding the clothes already in the suitcase.

I watch her for a moment, again not knowing what I would do or be without her. I get down and kiss her a dozen times and even though she pushes me off, I see the smile on her face.

"Go shower!" She retorts.

I shower as fast as I can, scrubbing the important parts hard and fast. I pour on lotion gifted from Bath and Body then slide on all my clothes again. Remus beeps his horn a few minutes after.

"Ughh! My phone!" I panic, looking around my room.

"I got it. Come on." Trisha calls from downstairs.

I run downstairs and see that she is dressed in a hoody and sweats just like me, she must of took a quick shower herself because she smells amazing and all her make up is off her face..

"My keys." I say annoyed.

She dangles the keys in front of me.

"Oh my God. I love you." I say as I lock up.

Remus opens the car doors and Trish and I sit in the back.

"Did you find an available flight?" Trisha asks me.

"No we will deal with that when we get there." I fan her off.

I check the time and realize that it is close to 3 AM. Trisha knows I sound ridiculous but she leaves it because she knows by some miracle that I will get us the flight to Trevon and she knows if I can't get a flight that I would find one myself and fly it there then worry about the consequences later.

Remus catches up on what's going on and we swear him to secrecy though we trust him already. With very little traffic on the road, he speeds to the airport and gets us there in 20 minutes time. We grab our bags from the trunk and are about to head inside when Remus calls to me.

I run back to the car.

"Put your hoody up and keep the shades close by, you don't want the attention now, I'm sure." He says protective.

I nod and pull the hoody over my head. I kiss his cheek and disappear with Trisha into the large airport. I already see people looking at me, I grab the shades from my carry on and place them securely on my face.

"Okay, so what's the plan?" Trisha questions.

I hear the question but by the time she turns towards me, I am already walking to the airport worker at the empty register up ahead.

"Hello, Good morning." The woman who looks to be in her late 20s smiles at me.

I smile back politely.

"Good morning, I wanted to know if there was any last minute flight to New York before the one at 7 AM." I say politely.

She shakes her head with just a glance at the screen and my heart sinks to the bottom of my shoes.

"Did you check?" I laugh subtle, it comes off as rude.

"I did, I've been looking at the screen for the last 4 hours, there are no more flights to New York until 7 AM, ma'am. I apologize." She answers as nicely as she can manage but I can tell I have bothered her.

"I really need to get to New York on an earlier flight, it's an emergency and it's severely important that I get-"

"There's nothing I can do. The flight at 7 AM will be $500 per person, if you want that one." She responds.

I sigh loudly, my hands going up to my head in panic.

I want to cry but I shake it off. I'm getting there before they release him.

Think Chanel.

You have to be there.

You HAVE to.

I look around the airport, there aren't many people around but the workers are already staring as I have clearly drawn their attention to me by freaking out.

I shift my hoody off of my head and it falls. I reach up to the shades and slide them off my face.

"What are you doing?" Trisha says, by my side immediately.

The airport worker looks confused for a moment and then suddenly apologetic. She smiles brightly.

"Wow, you're Chanel." She chuckles, suddenly becoming shy.

"I fucks with your music, hard." She compliments, her eyes widen and she looks around to see if any of her workers heard her. I laugh and shrug it off.

"Thank you. I don't usually pull any kind of fame card but I'm so desperate right now, i'm honored that you even know who I am." I say sincere.

"Everyone here knows who you are! My parents were raised in Brooklyn, I'm always there." She laughs. "Can I have a picture?"

I try not to show my emotions but I can feel the grimace on my face.

"I didn't want anyone to know that I'm headed to New York. If we take the picture, can you wait to post it?" I ask nicely.

"Sure. No problem!" She squeaks.

She takes out her phone and I smile slightly and she snaps it.

"Thank you so much, girl. Let me check this stupid'ol screen again. You know people cancel flights all the time. Maybe something opened up." She insists.

I watch as her blue long nails tip and tap the keys, her eyes focused on the computer.

Trisha looks at me and shakes her head, impressed.

"There are no flights going straight there, but there is a flight going to Pennsylvania. From Pennsylvania, there should be another connecting flight to New York but there might be a lay over or delay of about 2 hours." The woman says.

"I'll take it. It's better than being this far away." I say.

"When does it leave?" Trisha chimes in.

"It leaves at 4:15 am, they're boarding right now." She looks panicked.

I put my hoody back up and grab my wallet and photo ID.

"We'll take the tickets." I say quickly.

"Okay, that will be-"

"I don't care, I don't care. Please hurry." I rush.

She takes my card and swipes it, I sign and we both give her our photo IDs. She prints the tickets and we run off to TSA checkpoints. Just as a lady dressed in full blue is about to close the plane door, Trisha and I scream her down. She is startled and looks at us like we are maniacs.

"We need to get on that plane." I say out of breathe.

"Tickets?" She asks weirdly.

She glances at the tickets and rips off the bottom.

"Lucky you." She shakes her head and smiles.

"Thank you so much." I breath.

She opens the gate and Trisha and I make it on to the plane. We don't get a seat together but at least we've made the flight.

I take the next five hours to sleep, I don't think I've ever been this tired.

____________________________________________________

We arrive in Philadelphia close to 6 AM. My body is still tired but all I can think about is the look on his face when he sees me, all I can think about is holding him after so long. I imagine already his smile, the dimples pouring into his cheeks like water down a fall. His almond eyes, long eyelashes and plump lips.

"Oh my God, that's Chanel." A young girl motions to her friend. Her friend looks at me and screams, I turn away quickly.

I can hear the Mother's voice as the two girls erupt in chaos.

"Mommy, mommy can we go take a picture with her?" They ask impatient.

Trisha and I sit by the terminal as our connecting flight has delayed, just like the girl in Cali said. The lay over isn't suppose to be more than 2 hours, but we have been here for close to two hours already.

Trisha sleeps on my shoulder, her hoody up and her mouth wide open.

The two little girls end up coming over. I was hoping the Mother could talk them out of it. I turn my head to the side, hoping they stop and think if it really is me but the two children are sure.

"Hi Chanel, my name is Hailey. I-wanted to as-" She starts and the younger girl beside her interrupts.

"We want to take a picture with you." She says. They both smile. They are amazingly adorable with their dark skin and baby hair poking out of their pony tail. I smile and nod my head.

I ease Trisha off of me and kneel down in between both of them.

The Mother snaps the photo and I hug them both. They smell like clean laundry.

"Thank you!" They say in unison.

"You're welcome." I smile.

"We loved the album a lot." The older child says.

Some of the songs on that album were definitely not child friendly. I go with it.

"Thank you sweetheart. I'm very glad you liked it."

"Okay, bye." They say as their Mother begins to pull them away. She turns and says 'Thank you' herself, not even seeming to notice who I am or much about me which makes me chuckle.

I get back to my seat and find Trisha awake.

"Put your shades back on n that won't happen." She says sleepy.

"Forgot they were off." I say casually. I slide them back onto my face and doze off again. When I wake up it is 9 AM and the flight has been delayed for another hour.

"Oh my God. We Made it all this way, just to still not get there on time?" Trisha asks annoyed.

"Hell no we didn't." I say pulling my phone out of my carry on.

Flex answers on the first ring. "Where are you?" He greets.

"We stuck in Phili, our connecting flight is delayed." I answer.

"Damn, so what's the plan?" He questions.

I sigh into the phone and tap my nails against the arm rest.

"How long would it take to cab it?" I question.

"I'm not sure, like two hours at least." Flex answers.

"Okay, be there in two hours." I say, hanging up the phone.

"What?" Trisha looks at me crazy. "But what if the flight leaves in the next hour?" She asks.

"What if it doesn't leave until 12? I can't wait around for that, at least with the cab I know we will get there in the next 2 hours, I don't know what this plane is doing and frankly I'm not gonna wait around to find out." I pick up my carry on and begin walking to the exit.

"But all our luggage is in New York, Chan! The bags aren't even here!" Trisha picks up her handbag and begins running after me.

I continue walking, nothing in the world would stop me from getting to him, I don't care what comes up. Outside is a little chilly, but not as bad as I expected it to be at the ending of fall. We run to a cab waiting right outside of the airport and tap on the window. The window goes down and a brown man with black hair stares back at us.

"Hello, can you take us to New York?" I ask.

"Yes, but that is a lot of money." He says with a small laugh.

"That's fine." I say opening the door. I climb in and Trisha gets in behind me.

It is truly a wonder how money comes in handy. None of this would have been possible without my newly acquired wealth or fame. I thank God for the blessings as the taxi cab pulls off. An hour passes and Trisha and I are awake and talking about different times when Trev would just look out for us even when we didn't know it.

Our entire conversation in the car only made me more and more excited to see him. But then the worry sets in.

Would I be me, if the worry didn't set in?

Truly, would I?

I don't think I would. And at least I know that the fame hasn't changed me, because I still worry about the same things I used to. That's a sign by itself.

Would things be the same between us? Would they just pick up where they left off, before everything happened? Before that night coming home from the library? Before his jail sentence? Before Julius died from a trauma related to how bad he beat him just to protect me?

I don't even know.

But it's better than nothing at all.

And if it doesn't go right back to the way it was, then I'll settle for even a glimpse of it. Just to kiss him again. Just to have him hold me. I check the time and it reads 10:35 AM. We are only thirty minutes away. I call Flex and let him know to wait for us so that we can all drive there together.

I'm not sure what the cab price comes up to, but I give him the $500 dollars I have in my wallet. As I am getting out of the car he calls me back.

"Too much, too much." He says in his broken English.

"It's okay. Thank you for getting us here." I say nicely.

"Thank you." He says with much gratitude, his smile warms my heart but my heart sets on fire when Flex walks out of his Bronx studio to greet me and Trisha.

I hug him tightly and his big bear arms wrap around me easy.

"Where's the rest of your stuff?" He questions confused.

"Ha! At the airport." Trisha scuffs.

Flex chuckles and we walk to his car immediately.

"Alright well lets go get Trev, we worry about that later." Flex announces.

The sound of his name makes my chest throb. I will get to see him soon. I will get to physically hold him and touch him in less than an hour.

I take the time to go over what I am going to say, I don't want to sound like an idiot. I don't want to sound like I didn't miss him but I don't want to scare him. As the car bumps and glides to the prison, my mind begins to close in on itself.

How do I stand when he sees me? What do I do? Don't cry. Don't scare him, Chan.

Trisha and Flex, leave me to be engulfed in my thoughts.

I look at the time and it reads 11:42. We are almost there.

I pull out the mirror out of my handbag and check my face. I am wearing no make up. Maybe I should have put on make up, maybe I should have gave him something amazing to look at. Instead I'm in sweats with a rugged face and average hair.

We pull into the driveway and park by the gate we are directed to park at. It looks barren here, eerie and cloudy, even on this beautiful day at noon. Flex and Trisha get out the car but my heart is pounding into my throat, my palms are sweaty and my hands are shaking. I check my face in the mirror again and then my breath and then I adjust my clothes.

My breathing is too heavy, I try to slow it down. If anyone was paying attention to me in the car, they would think I was going crazy. I see Trisha and Flex standing by the car, laughing with each other, waiting for someone to meet us out here. A guard comes up to them, speaks with them briefly then returns to the fence and into the prison.

I stare into space. I stare into space until I begin to lose myself.

There is a knock on the window which startles me Flex sees me jump and puts his hands up in surrender. I wind the window down.

"I ain't mean to scare you darling, but I know you ain't left your luggage at the airport, plane and cabbed it all the way here, to sit in this car while this man gets out." Flex has that smile on his face that he always does.

"I know you scared. I know. Suck it up. Let's go." He opens the door and holds his hand out to me.

I take it and exit the car, then let it slam behind me. Slowly I walk and stand next to Trisha. She rubs my arm and smiles.

"Your man is bout to be here any minute." She speaks.

Her words are distant. There is a loud ringing in my ear that wont stop and I fear that the quiet is making me go deaf.