《No Happy Endings? (COMPLETED)》XXVI: Eye Of The Storm

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Claire's POV:

Nightmares filled my next nights, most of them were about Justin and his sayings which he said when he visited here. On Sunday night, I wasn't able to sleep anymore. I just laid there my eyes open and stared to the ceiling.

"That bastard can ever give you that happiness which I gave to you"

I hated the way how he called Robert. How he dared to call person like that who he didn't know or hasn't ever met.

But same time I hated it how he was on some point right. Most of our time we had fought nowadays.

My happiness with Robert and then Justin was totally opposite. With Justin, I enjoyed every moment with him even those when we fought because they had ever been physical. Just light name-calling and yelling. I felt safe even when he wasn't around.

With Robert, I enjoyed those times when we were together and when he was sober. When we went out for fancy dinners and sat on the couch together, when he was close to me. Fights with him were terrible especially the last ones.

I loved him but now when I started thought about frame of our relationship, I couldn't find the reason why I deep down let the love blind me that way and make me stay and take all those hits from him.

I had no lack of money, not lack of safety or support, my life was in the end good, so where I needed a man? I had no idea. I loved myself enough already, in the end I wouldn't have need anyone.

But that all thinking didn't really removed that fact, it was rude to call other as a bastard if he didn't know him. Only jealous person would do that.

Yeah, that was it, he was jealous over us. He was jealous that I wasn't his anymore. It might sound stupid but not impossible.

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"Claire, I gave you my everything but it wasn't enough to you"

That was what he thought but I didn't know could I agree with him because if he gave everything to me, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here where I was now. Sitting on the bed in the middle of the night and thinking about what I should do with my life.

He gave me a lot of things but it was kind of too much say that he gave everything.

Of course, it was just his way to effect on my feelings. He was too good on that. He knew how to make me emotional and weak with them.

He said that he had broken up with Julia or whatever was that girl's name but I thought that it was just a lie. He didn't want make me even more sad that I already was.

It's no wonder why he's so popular. His music and songs were like a dope to his fans. He addicted them with his words and voice and the problem was that there was no medicine of that addiction.

I had followed that almost three years next to him and I knew all his tricks which he used. But one thing I had ever found out, the weapon which he had used to make me stay around his finger.

After few weeks of our breakup I had realized what it was, kindness. He had used that another drug of his on me, his kindness. The biggest and the most powerful weapon which anyone could use on me.

"You can't change your mind in every other second. You have to choose your side"

That was what I was doing right now too, I noticed. I was looking for good and bad sides of both. When one get point, in other battle other beat him. In the end, they were in same line and the game ended tied. I had to do my own choice now.

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"It's up to you now, Claire"

I heard his voice in my head. He was right. I had to take rein in my own hands and collect things together in my head. This wasn't a game. This was life, my life. I had to take control of my own life.

I couldn't let the storm take me, I had to step on it and tame it. Before it would be too late.

~

Thoughts? This was maybe one of the messiest chapter ever, I'm sorry. I finished this like in 2am so sorry for weird sentences etc.

I might re-write this later like probably all my chapters. Check word order, grammar etc.

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